"Your turn, Cassidy," Calista told her. "Truth or dare?"
"Dare." Cassidy thought to herself.
Dana and Calista got up and went into the hallway to decide upon
Cassidy's fate. For a moment, they both sat there thinking. Scully broke the
silence. "What's the name of that nasty soccer coach of yours?"
"Oh...that's Irene...wait...you want her to call Irene? That's
PERFECT!!" Giggling, they both walked back into the living room.
"You have to prank Irene!" Scully said, a grin on her face. Cassidy
tipped her head, a smiling. She reached for the phone. "Hey, sis? You know
the number?" "Yeah. 555-6666."
Cassidy rolled her eyes. "No, seriously. What's her number?"
"That *is* her number!" They all laughed at the irony. Cassidy
pressed in the numbers and listened for Irene to pick up.

"Um...is your refrigerator running?" Cassidy asked, failing miserably
at her attempt to conceal her laughter. Her sister stole the phone from her
and quietly said to her, "Let me show you how to do it!"
"Monica? It's me, Billy-bob." Calista said in a southern drawl. In
the background, Dana and Cassidy were rolling on the floor, keeping their
laughter as quiet as they could. "I love you, Monica! You're much better
than Hillary!!"
"Oh, I'm sorry. Wrong house. Well...I love you anyway!!" Calista
said, hanging up. Now they were all really laughing. It took them a whole
five minutes to stop, and by then, their sides were really starting to hurt.
"Calista, your turn!" Cassidy squealed. "What? I just went!"
"That was my turn. You know the rules! Your turn!"
Calista sat on the floor while Dana and Cassidy plotted.
"No! That would be too mean!" Dana said.
"I don't like the sound of that," Calista called.
"Okay, Calista. You have to call the Gunmen and ask one of them to
marry you." Cassidy said, grinning. "What? Do I have to say who I am?"
"No, but that would be interesting..." Cassidy said.
"Which one?" "Doesn't matter," Dana said shrugging.
"Ok, here it goes."
"Hello?" John Fitzgerald Byers answered the phone reluctantly.
"John, is that you?" Calista said with a soft, muted, voice.
"Yes. Who is this?"
"It's me. Listen, John, I don't have time to talk but I need to ask
you something..." she paused trying to cover her giggles. "Will you marry me?"
"Susanne? Susanne Modeski is that you?"
"I have to go! Good-bye, my love." Calista giggled again. "That was
so cruel!" "Hey Calista, could you do a British voice?" Scully asked her.
"Like this?" she said, matching the exact tone of voice Scully was
looking for.
"Can you call Mulder and tell him your name is Phoebe Greene and say
you miss him so much?" Scully said, smiling.
"But of course!" Calista picked up the phone and dialed Mulder'snumber.
"Fox, it's Phoebe. Phoebe Greene." Calista told him.
Mulder heasitated for a moment.
"Fox, honey, I miss you so much! Things are so different here without
you!" Calista urged on. Cassidy sat by her waiting for his response.
he said quietly.
"WHAT?! What are you talking about?!" Calista screamed into the
telephone.
Calista listened
to the dial tone.
"Wow! He really hates her." Cassidy said, stating the obvious.
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Back at his apartment, Mulder made a mental note to buy himself a
caller I.D. machine. He knew those twins
well. They could make any sane person act... well...weird. He was going to
find out. He picked up his coat and the keys to Scully's house.
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He knocked lightly twice, but no one came to the door. Then, he let
himself in. He walked further into the apartment, into the guest room, to
discover the sleeping forms of his twin cousins and Scully. The two girls
were laying on Scully's lap; one on each side. been thinking about when she said she wanted a normal life.> It would have
been nice to come home to family; a wife and children. He smiled and had the
strangest feeling inside of him. It was very strange, in that it was so
strong: he wanted more than anything else to stay with Scully and those girls
through the night. But he knew he couldn't. Rather than frown, he smiled at
the 'sleeping angels' and took all three of them to Scully's room, laying them
down gently on her bed. Then, he grabbed some extra blankets and fell asleep
on the couch.
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Calista woke up to the smell of pancakes. She opened her eyes and
looked around the room frantically before finally remembering where she was.
"Cassidy?" she called.
"Come on Cal! I thought you would never get up!" Cassidy said, smiling
at her sister.
Calista grabbed one of Dana's brushes and ran it through her brown
hair. Grabbing a scrunchie, she put it up. She walked into the kitchen where
a red shirt was thrown at her head.
"Here. Put this on and eat some breakfast or you'll be late for the
game!" Dana told her, handing her a plate full of pancakes.
After eating as many as she could and getting in her uniform, she
followed her sister and Scully to Mulder's car. "When did he get here?"
Calista whispered to her sister. Cassidy just shrugged, and off they went.
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"Come on, say it with me...win Win WIN!!!!" Coach Irene told her
players. The team just mumbled in response.
"Hey, we're not going to win like that!" Coach Bob said, walking
towards his team. "All right, girls. Say it with me. Win Win WIN!!" The
girls screamed out the words along with Bob. Irene looked over at him and
gave him a questioning look, as if to say 'How did you do that?' Bob just
shrugged his shoulders.
"Okay, let's deal out the positions..." said Bob, consulting his
clipboard. "Cassidy, you can be in goal first half, if you want, and Calista,
you're defense. Christina..." The girls didn't hear another word he said, as
they walked away from the circle to Uncle Fox and their new-found friend,Dana.
"I get to be in goal first half," Cassidy bragged, doing a victory
dance like a drunken football player. Her sister playfully punched her in the
arm. "It's not that big of a deal, gosh, Cass!"
"That's great!" Scully encouraged her. "I'm sure you both will do a
good job."
"Yeah. Until the space ship comes," Cassidy said dryly, again showing
how much her sense of humor was like her uncle's.
"Hey, you guys better go," remarked Mulder. "The ref just stepped onto
the field."
"Wish us luck!" Calista said, hugging her uncle. Her sister did the
same and waved goodbye to Scully.
Mulder and Scully sat watching the girls as their team got into their
positions. Cassidy had on heavy goalie gloves and a long-sleeved goalie
jersey.
"Poor Cassidy...she must be sweating bullets in that thing!" Scully
said. Just then, the whistle blew, signalling the beginning of the game.
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It was now the beginning of the second half of the game. No abductions
had occured, and it didn't look like it would happen again any time soon. The
other team had scored one on them, but the Sliders had come back and scored on
the other team. Now the score was tied up at 1.
"Come on, girls! Win Win WIN!!!!" Irene screamed. Calista was running
with the ball, when all of a sudden, the air became thick. She struggled to
pick up her feet. Irene attempted to yell at her, but the air affected her,
and she didn't have the energy to run her mouth. Without warning, the light
came back and covered the entire field. "NOOOOOO!" Irene shouted in slow
motion. All of a sudden, one of the girls, Sara Jennings, got lifted into the
air. "My...my, my, PLAYER!!!!" Irene shouted again. Before they knew it, the
spaceship had gone and things were back to normal.
"Keep on playing, girls!" Irene instructed. Bob gave her a funny look
but said nothing. So they played on for the next few minutes or so. The
light came again, taking another victim. This time, it was Erin Timult.
Then, the ship left again. Irene was pissed. Oh, yes, VERY pissed. She
jumped up and down, pounding the ground with her feet. Her face was redder
than a tomato. Bob worried if he touched it, it would explode into a million
pieces. "It's okay," he consoled her. "We can still play! But one more
player, and I'm afraid we won't be able to." Irene took a sip of water from
her water bottle to calm herself. She nodded and stepped away.
"Hang in there, Sliders!" Bob encouraged his team.
The game continued on. Just then, the other team fired a rocket at the
goal. Cassidy dove to her right and caught the ball with ease. She fell on
the ground and made an "oomph" sound. She cringed and looked at her wrist.
"Wow...she's really good!" commented Scully. But Mulder said nothing.
The wheels in his head were turning. Scully supposed he was thinking about
the spaceship.
Cassidy kicked the ball to her sister, the only open player. Calista
passed up the other team easily and made her way to the goal.
"Positions, Calista!! Get in your postion!!! Positions Positions
POSITIONS!!!!" Coach Irene screamed at the girl.
"Bitch, bitch, bitch," Calista mumbled to herself as she made her way
to the goal. As she was about to score, she imagined the ball as Coach
Irene's head and shot it. It scored.
The team cheered and gave each other high-fives, yet no one noticed
Calista Mulder making her way to Coach Irene, water bottle in hand. She dumped
the contents of the bottle all over Irene.
Irene just laughed. "Oh Calista, you're so silly!! Good Job!
Remember... win Win WIN!!!"
Calista fumed. She was about to punch out her coach when her sister
came up behind her. "Cal, just ignore her."
"Kill Kill KILL!!" Calista mumbled.
"Come on, get in goal! I hurt my wrist on the last play." Calista
reluctantly accepted the sweaty jersey and ran to the goal box.
"Mulder, isn't that cute; they even have your temper," Scully said,
laughing. Mulder looked up. "What?" "Never mind."
The light came AGAIN! Cassidy screamed. The light circled Lela
Jewelse and began to take her up into the air. Calista was the closest to
Lela and was able to grab Lela's ankle and latch her own foot to the goal post
at the same time. She fought with all she had in her to not let go of the
girl, but her attempt failed miserably.
Scully and Mulder tried to run to save the girl, but the light was too
bright, and they were too slow. There was a big blast, and the space ship
flew away. Calista and Lela were gone.
All of a sudden, Irene's eyes took on a demonic glow, as if she was
possessed. She appeared to be focusing on nothing in particular. Without
even realizing what she was doing, she was gripping her hair and harshly
ripping it out. "No...No...NO!!! win...Win...WIN!!!" she screamed.
Cassidy ran as fast as she could to place where her sister had been
standing. All that was left was one of Calista's spikes. "Calista!!!" Cassidy
screamed to the sky. She collapsed to the ground, bawling her eyes out.
"Samantha." Mulder mumbled, lost in thought. Snapping back to the
present, he went to comfort his cousin.
"Would someone help me?!" Calista's voice floated from a nearby bush.
Everyone ran to the spot where her voice had come from.
"Yes...Yes...YES!" Irene cried, running her hand through her slightly
thinner hair. With spots of hair ripped out on each side, she looked like
Bozo the Clown.
"My leg hurts," Calista whined as all the parents pulled her out of
the small thicket that was behind the soccer fields.
"What happened?" Coach Bob asked, genuinely concerned.
"I wasn't able to hold on to Lela; and when the blast came, I was
blown over here," she explained.
"Can you play???" was all Bozo could say.
"Irene, is that all you ever think about?!?!" Bob shouted at her. "If
she's injured in any way, she's not playing!!"
"I'm...I'm okay. But we can't play anyway, right? Lela's gone..."
"Yeah, that's right...I...guess we can't play." Coach Bob said sadly.
"No No NO!!!!" Irene reached for her hair again, but one of the
parents standing nearby grabbed her hands and stopped her.
"Don't do that; it'll only make it worse," said the kind, sympathetic
man. Irene turned around to face him. He was a man in his late
forties...tall, authoritative, wore glasses. But most of all...he was going
bald!! "Here..." he reached into his bag and pulled out a small black box
labeled 'Rogaine.' "This'll really help."
Irene stared hungrily at the box. "Oooh, I'll have to use this when I
get home!!" She wandered happily away from the crowd, clutching the box to
her chest.
Mulder and Scully gasped at the man handing the Rogaine to Irene.
"Skinner!" they both said in unison. They both looked at each other, confused
as to why he'd be at a soccer game. He didn't have any children, as far as
they knew. They approached him. "Skinner?" Mulder asked tentatively.
"Who?" asked the man.
"Oh, it must not be you. Sorry to trouble you, Mr..."
"Mr. Tillman," the man offered, "and it's no trouble at all."
Mulder walked away, grinning at Scully. "What a *weird* coincidence!"
All of the sudden a light burst through the air, but it was a
different light this time; not as bright. Some of the girls screamed as
Jeannie, Sara, Erin, and Lela fell from the mysterious craft.
"They have come for me!!!" Irene called to the mother-ship. "I *knew*
I'd be with my family again!!" With that, she was lifted into the air, never
to be seen again.
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"God Cass, don't eat all of it!" Calista called as she snatched the
Macaroni 'n' cheese-covered spoon from Cassidy.
Cassidy stuck her tongue out at her sister and grabbed Calista's
crutches.
"Hey!" Calista whined as Cassidy ran to the other side of the room.
"Give those back!"
Scully and Mulder laughed as Calista limped over to her sister.
"You could help you know." she said, giving them a threatening look.
Then, she turned her eyes back to her sister. "How old are you?"
Cassidy gave her sister her crutches back and sat at the table. "So
what do you guys think happened out there?" Cassidy said, questioning Mulder
and Scully.
Mulder turned around to face her. "It's kinda hard to say. We
examined the girls, and they had no implants or anything. They were fine.
But the crop cirles, bright light, the beaming up into the air...everything
seems right for an abduction."
Calista sighed. "Will we ever know what happened?"
"I don't know, Cal. I really don't know." he replied.
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In a far off distant land...
"Do you have enough information to take over their planet, Agent
Einyeinyein?" "Yes, high commander, earth will be ours!" With that Agent
Einyeinyein, also known as Coach Irene thought to herself, we will take over their planet! We will win Win WIN!> The end End END!
(or is it?)