X_X

"...denial..."

He didn't know where he was going, as long as he felt he could keep pressing forward, pretending that no painful things had happened. Satou ignored the sound of rushing vehicles, people chattering with each other, hollow footsteps on the pavement. In his mind, the memory of yesterday event coursed through his body as the sorrow reached his heart.

Yoshida's gone...

His incurable diseases took the small boy away from him, from his family and from the few of his friends. Among all of people that knew Yoshida, Satou planted the thought that he was the one who hurt the most - because Yoshida was the precious important person to him.

The most important.

Yoshida's last words rang in his head. He just stared at him with broken but full of affection gaze and at that time, something broke inside Satou.

But no...this was merely a bad dream. A nightmare. Tomorrow everything would return to normal and Yoshida would be lying next to him, smiling ever so brightly.

Except, when Satou woke up the next morning, the spot where Yoshida used to lie on was cold.

Cold and empty.

"...anger..."

Satou wasn't furious. He was livid, perhaps beyond livid. He refused to hear his family told him that it was going to be okay, that he needed to move on and let him go. How could he? When he was his everything? No one understood. They acted like they knew and cared. It was merely a performance of a happy family. He knew. They couldn't fool him with those sad and understanding smiles.

His final string snapped when his dearest sister attempted to make him forget about Yoshida - because to her, Yoshida was nothing but a monkey-shaped eyes boy who was slowly running her brother's life. He hollered. Red angry veins made its way to his face, as he forced his sister to leave him room.

He didn't want to listen to anyone saying that life should move on.

He just wanted people to shut up and leave him alone.

"...bargaining..."

Why him?

And as always, there was no answer to that question. No matter how many times he wondered, it was pointless.

Please, turn back time.

Satou's eyes brows narrowed in disdain. Please just...just give him back. I'll do anything.

Once again, he was rewarded with another silence.

"...depression..."

"What would Yoshi say if he saw you like this?" Tsuyako spoke in a low, composed tone. Her hands folded on her knees as she sat elegantly on the couch in the corner of her friend's room. Tsuyako observed the quiet man with profound gaze, contemplating why Satou was holding a beach ball with utmost care.

"Yoshida's gone, Tsuyako. He won't know." and damn, it hurt to admit that.

Then, slowly, the girl roused from her seat, giving her friend a disapproving look.

"You're not the only one who's hurting." she uttered thoughtfully. "He was my friend and...Yoshi believed his lover was a strong person." with that, she left. Her heels made a click clack sound on the floorboards. Satou didn't bid her farewell (as always). He looked at the spot where she once sat on, and then he turned his head back to stare at the beach ball.

The beach ball was the last thing he had of Yoshida because of it inside was his deceased lover's trapped breath. The only connection he had of him.

"...acceptance..."

Months had passed and still..."The world isn't stopping." In his weary state, Satou pondered, the world wouldn't stop revolving no matter what happened. It wouldn't wait for him, it waited for no one. And that was his cue life must move on. "Everything's falling apart."

'Then you just have to use super glue and put everything together again!' Satou chortled as he remembered Yoshida's favorite line. Yes, Yoshida was gone. He was now part of his past. However, he would forever be a past he treasured above of all. Without the past, there would be no future.

Satou took the beach ball and opened the seal, allowing the air to escape from the plastic object.

'You'll be fine.' those were Yoshida's last words.

Satou closed his eyes. A smile graced his face.

"Yeah."

I'll be fine.

X_X

Written by Wookie