Disclaimer: All characters, places and situations mentioned and embodied are not my own, I only borrow them for a short amount of time.
A cynical, berating look at why Jade West is Jade West. All for a boy.
The Girl Who Runs With Scissors
[and the boy who won't]
She calls him Casanova.
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He hates coffee. He hates the colour black. He hates mean, cynical girls who look down imperiously at others.
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Ever wondered why she is the way she is?
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He dated her because she was safe. It's a funny thought – dark, mysterious, vicious Jade West is anything but safe in the eyes of the overall student body, but she knows it's the truth. He dated her because he needed a piece of arm candy, a girl to shower with meaningless gifts and kiss by the lockers. High school flings were going out of fashion and as the self-declared 'coolest guy in school' needed to keep on top of the trends. Suddenly going out with strings of pretty, blonde cheerleads was frowned upon (oh, the horror!) and long term relationships were becoming the norm.
Of course he had to choose her. It gave a sort of impression to his classmates (hey look – I tamed the Silent Jade West) and it gave him the sort of security he needed. There was absolutely no chance of him falling in love with her (because however he acted, he wasn't a one girl kind of guy) so he asked her out.
She was just decoration. She was just the plain white icing on the cake that no-one liked. While she was busy being ignored he was busy swapping spit with his flavour of the week behind the curtains in the auditorium. Of course she knew. She's the all-knowing, forever cynical Jade West, after all. She knew what she was in for from the very beginning.
Which begs the question: why? (Oh, so many answers.) But it just boils down to one, in the end. [(She liked him.)] Despite her better judgement and every warning about falling for pretty faces she said yes to that date and never looked back (she convinces herself it was worth it. Most of the time she's not so sure.)
So she stops being the plain white icing. She's always been a tad frightening but now she notches the intimidation up to full blast. Electric blue highlights go into her hair. Her nails are painted black and her eyes are smothered in paint. She sharpens her attitude and practises her glares in front of the mirror. Anything to be noticed. Anything to make it all worth it. Anything to become Wild Jade West. Anything to shield her from this constant heartbreak. ('Cuz he's a heart-breaker.)
He still sneaks around behind her back (of course he does, people don't change drastically within a week (she's an actress)). She still notices the ten minutes it takes him to get to the cafeteria, still sees the lipstick smudges at the corner of his mouth. Jade's gotten good enough to guess who his victim was with a fair amount of accuracy. She's had the practise. (She's so damn tired of it all, so damn jaded.)
(God, how she loves dark irony.)
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(It was inevitable really.)
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She's his smokescreen (wafer thin, so very delicate), the opaque glass he places in front of himself to hide his true nature. It's amazing what people will believe. (and the damage a pretty smile can inflict.)
(Beck is so much more dangerous than the girl who runs with scissors.)
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It becomes less, slowly. Her iron façade and piercing glares start to take effect. She might not be able to keep Beck away from the girls but she sure as hell can keep the girls away from Beck. (choose the lesser of twoevils.)
They make progress. Joint projects bring them closer; the mask they must bare wraps them tightly in each other's company. They learn to filter out the bad. (Everyone will say that she's difficult, obstinate, downright mean (they're not wrong) but he's just as bad. He tells no lies but he tells no truths either.) He starts to love her – the girl underneath the makeup and hair colour and black. He learns to love the plain white icing in her but he also loves her bark and bite. She can tell because he starts inviting her over, spending time with her, talking to her. And Jade falls harder, faster (she's not scared. she loves the r-u-s-h.)
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Tori jars them to a halt. Jade hates her, hates her curling brown hair and her delicate little face and her chocolate brown eyes that one can just melt into. (she was always the delicate one.)
Tori threatens to ruin everything they've (she's) worked so hard for. Jade knows because she sees the look in Beck's eyes as the infernal new girl (how horrifically cliché) hastily wipes the coffee off of his shirt. His smile is their smile – the smile that belongs to his portfolio of fangirls, each one laid out carefully on a page in his life. It's the sweet, I-really-like-you liar grin his flicks on whenever one of them walks a little too close or bumps into him a little too accidently. (What did you expect? she yells at herself. He's an actor.)
(never trust professional liars. never trust pretty faces.)
And the worst part in this melodrama that has become her life? She's just his type too. Not the airheads with their bubblegum smiles and light laughter and dyed blonde hair (yeah, she' really not one so speak but hey, why don't we add hypocrite to the list?) that flutter in out of his life like bothersome flies. She's exactly the kind that every boy secretly loves, charming and sweet and funny and so-so-so talented.
Jade's so different. (special.) [She writes and directs and casts and] she sings occasionally and acts because it's the staple of everyone's career. She wears black and electric blue and too much eyeliner. She's snappy and rude and doesn't give a damn. She's nothing like Tori and it kills her to see Beck staring after brown locks and stylish clothes. (No-one likes special.) (They just want comforting normalness with a side of cherry lip gloss and a bright smile.)
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She falls for a guy who is so superficial he needs a fake girlfriend to stay popular.
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He falls for a girl who is so deep her soul is shrouded in shadow.
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She's anything but a liar and he's anything but truthful.
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She doesn't hide her feelings, doesn't bite back her thoughts.
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Every word out of his perfectly proportioned lips is another carefully constructed [mis]truth.
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And yet he loves her, no matter how many other girls he falls for in the meantime. For someone so used to playing pretend she is refreshingly real to him.
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One day, Jade promises herself. One day he'll have eyes for only you.
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(But he's Casanova, the man who never gave away happy endings.)
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In the end she's not really that special.
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He doesn't kill her inside. She doesn't drown in her sorrow. He runs off with Tori and she's relieved. (She laughs about that, later.) She finds someone [eventually].