It just wasn't fair.
The memories that surfaced upon that thought only proved to add insult to injury. Her emerald green eyes snapped closed to shut out the sight before her.
"Sarah!"
The strangled cry was awkward and muffled from the direction of her roommate's bed. Though, in a way it was almost impressive that she could form words at all with his tongue so far down her throat. She could feel her brow twitch sharply at the sound of the pair rushing to separate.
"Sarah, hun, I thought you had another class today…"
Her gaze snapping back to her soon to be ex-boyfriend in utter disbelief, she managed to school her expression into a bitter smirk, channeling a certain condescending narcissist from her past. Pulling her shoulders back and tilting her chin just so, her displeasure seemed to fill the room with a tangible spark.
"My apologizes, Brian. I didn't mean to inconvenience you with my abrupt schedule change…" spitting the words out like poison in her mouth. If only she could imitate his unaffected air as well… She swiftly turned on her heels and flew from the room before the traitorous tears managed to break free.
Their pleading voices rang out behind her as she nearly tumbled down the stairs in haste. Oh yes, I want nothing more than to stay and hear how you accidentally managed to fall on top on my roommate in only your boxers while trying to help her find a filling she swallowed. Oh? Your hand up her shirt was just to try to help keep her warm? How chivalrous of you!
Giving the glass door to her dorm a not so gentle shove, her ears were assaulted by a distinct ripping noise as her favorite jacket decided it would rather remain (partially) behind, snagged as it was on the adjacent door handle. With only a momentary pause to let the rage bubble out in a less than elegant, "Aaaaaaahhhhh!" Sarah continued to stalk across the soggy grass of the courtyard, ignoring the near blinding sheets of water raining down.
"Just a minute!"
Sagging heavily against the wall just outside the worn apartment door, each second passed endlessly, replaying her day from the coffee mug she'd shattered to the rejection email for the grad study she'd applied to and through the events of the last hour leaving her cold, tired, dejected, and thoroughly disenchanted with the world around her.
The aged door creaked open shedding brighter light into the dingy hallway. Swinging around the corner of the door frame came the closest thing Sarah had ever known to a sister. Her wild red curls bounced carefree about her luminous face. But as she saw the state of her disheveled best friend, the joy seemed to evaporate from the very air around her.
"Sarah?! You okay? What happened to you?" Cassie's gently accented voice and slender arms wrapping tightly around her was the most soothing thing she'd felt in forever. As she was carefully guided into the cozy apartment, she felt some small amount of hope for the first time that day.
The comforting light scent of citrus and berries seemed to permeate the small space, and the warm glow from the small fireplace sent merry shadows dancing about the room. Sarah curled deeper into the worn quilt, her hands gratefully absorbing the heat from her mug of tea. Finally finishing the account of the worst day of her life, she turned her now dry but still swollen gaze to the couch's other occupant. Cassie leaned in, hand gently resting on Sarah's shoulder, a steady comfort in the storm of her raw emotions.
"Sarah… I am so sorry! You ne'er even would have looked twice at Brian if I had not pushed you to it! It's entirely my fault…" The guilt she genuinely felt twisting her lovely features in a painful way, her light brogue losing its character lilt.
"Honestly, while I feel rather betrayed, I can't say that I'm all that heartbroken. I mean… maybe it's because we'd only been dating a few weeks. I never really felt a spark with him. He was always just so…" ordinary, boring, mundane. A mismatched pair of eyes alit with teasing mirth, flashed in her mind, and she shook the haunting image away. "…not right." were the words she lamely settled on. "It's probably a good thing it didn't go any further… though, I can think of a few better ways he might have ended it."
Looking back up from her steaming drink, she saw relief begin to sweep away the shame and smooth the lines on the redhead's brow. It marveled her. Sarah got along well enough with others, but she was never able to make a connection, to feel close to any of her friends, or even boyfriends for that matter. Until Cassie. The honest kinship she shared with Cassie struck her as one of her greatest treasures. And taking in her friend's compassionate visage, she was pretty certain Cassie felt the same.
It was a strange chance meeting barely more than three years prior. Sarah had just moved into student housing at the university, and while most of the freshmen chose to spend that weekend pledging houses or enjoying their new-found freedom at campus parties, Sarah wandered through the small town she would call home for the next few years.
In wasn't long before her aimless meandering led her down a small bricked alley lit warmly in the orange sunset. While most of the storefronts on the main street boasted large, colorful, well-maintained signage, just before her was a half-hidden faded wooden sign with elegant script reading, "Books & Coffee". She might have missed the small placard entirely if the sun hadn't chosen that moment to gleam off the last of the gold paint set in the lettering.
The heavy oak door pushed open much easier than she had expected it to, and Sarah nearly stumbled into the little shop, her entrance announced by the delicate tones of a crystal chime above the door. Before she could right herself and look around, her nose was assailed by the intoxicating scent of ground coffee and aged leather. Glancing up, her mouth parted slightly at the wonder she had found. The high walls were lined to the ceiling with volume after volume of leather bound books, surrounding an assortment of antique furniture. Just past the last table on the right was an ornately carved counter curving out from the wall, furnished with a what appeared to be a wide selection of coffees & teas.
Only one of the room's two occupants bothered to look up from their books at her arrival, and the older gentleman barely spared a disinterested glance and a quick nod of his head before looking back down. While creeping insecurities made her consider that she might not belong here, her fascination pushed her deeper into the shop. She hadn't made it five step before one of the most beautiful and cheerful people Sarah had ever seen bounded out of the doorway at the back left and made a beeline for her.
"Fáilte Romhat! Come in, come in! Sit anywhere you like… except maybe by James over there. Likes his space, that one. But anywhere else… please take your time lookin about. Anythin' I can get you?" Partially entranced by the fair, freckled beauty with shining bright blue eyes, and partly overwhelmed by becoming the target of so much enthusiasm and attention, Sarah stood there stone-faced a moment as the girl, not much older than herself, waited patiently for an answer.
Heat coloring her cheeks as she finally came back to herself, Sarah quickly smiled back and looked over towards the offerings on and behind the counter. Stepping closer to peruse her options, her gaze settled on one of the homemade tea blends featured in a glass jar with a hand-written label sporting the same elegant script as the sign outside. "Maybe…the Willow's Rose? Please?"
"Comin right up!" Her head snapped up to see the girl just in front of her on the other side of the counter. When had she… Without missing a beat the lively girl set about her task, but stopped mid pour as if in dawning realization. Turning back to Sarah, she quickly wiped her hand on her apron before offering it, "I'm Cassie, by the by…"
"Sarah" As their hands met, a sort of charged warmth seemed to spread from the point of contact, clearly surprising both. Cassie recovered first, her kind smile stretching even wider still.
The fond memory wiping away the last of her self-pity, her brow furrowed with a sudden thought.
"Cassie, how is it that I never see you with anyone else? You are sweet, smart, pretty as hell… why don't you have other friends?" The utterly perplexed look on Cassie's face seemed to convey genuine confusion at such an obvious answer rather than any offense taken. Quickly catching herself, her charming smile reappeared.
"Gods, Sarah! You sure know to hit where it hurts." She playfully bumped Sarah with her shoulder to indicate that she was merely joking. But a teasing memory, faded by time, played just on the outside of her consciousness. Such an odd exclamation… but the wet heat running down her hand quickly brought her attention back into focus as she gave out a little yelp, "Cassie! The tea!"
It was only a few errant drops but Cassie leapt to grab a towel, apologizing profusely as she went. By the time she rushed back, her smile was firmly entrenched, "Well, surely this will be the last bit of bad luck for the day! I think you have more than filled your quota, so …"
Her bubbly statement was cut short by the angry buzz of a Sarah's cell phone on the side table next to her. Almost immediately, a familiar ringtone joined in, causing Sarah's smile to drop and brows to furrow deeply. "That's my dad…"
Her soft murmur trailed off as she moved to trade her tea for the phone before it could run to voicemail. "Hello? Dad?"
"Hi Sarah, Sweetie." His tone was flat and empty, and the fingers of dread began to walk their way up Sarah's spine. "Dad, what's wrong? Is Toby okay? Karen?"
Letting out a distinct sign, her father's voice quickly replied, "Yes, Toby is good. So are Karen and I. Sarah…"
The silence dragged on and Sarah was about to make sure the call hadn't disconnected, when he finally spoke again. His pained words clawing at her mind.
"Sarah… it's about your mother."