Why Doesn't Mommy Pray?
Disclaimer: I don't own any thing related or directly attributed to The Mindy Project.
"Piper, you have ten more minutes to slap on that face paint and then we have to leave." Mindy heard Casey yell down the hall to their 13-year-old daughter.
Mindy snuggled deeper into her pillow; she had thoroughly grown to enjoy Sunday mornings. Casey took Piper and CJ to church with him; allowing her to sleep in and the foursome would usually meet for a family brunch afterwards.
"Casey, can you please not refer to makeup as face paint. It's degrading towards women." Mindy softly quipped from her place on the bed as she looked over and saw him snapping on his watch.
"Well it's a good thing she is still a child, not a woman." He quickly followed back.
"Mom, I have a massive pimple on my face, can't I just stay home with you?" Piper dramatically cried, falling onto her parent's bed.
Mindy reached over and half-heartedly patted her leg. "Not my call, princess."
"Piper, people are coming to church to be focused on God, not your pimple." Casey said, raising an eyebrow.
"That is just something you were trained to say at that bible school. This is a serious problem." Mindy wanted to laugh, but she thought it would undermine her daughter's actual opinion of her father, so she decided to grin and shake her head instead.
"Well that bible school also told me to raise my kids to be contributing members to society and that includes going to church. Now let's go." Casey grabbed one of her feet and tried pulling her off the bed.
"No!" Piper cried, grabbing onto the comforter and pulling it off of Mindy in the process.
"Piper, you are reminding me of someone vaguely familiar right now. Oh, that's right, it was you ten years ago. Your tantrum is ruining the natural order of things and you know how I feel about disturbances." Mindy said, throwing on her glasses and sitting up.
Piper huffed and got up. Her mother usually was just as overdramatic as she was, if not more and she could tell by her tone of voice that mama was going to win today.
"Fine, I'll go, but I have some questions for you two later today." Piper said with as much of a serious voice as her normal hi-octave one would allow.
"If this is about the birds and the bees you are coming to work with me tomorrow. I'm putting in three IUD's." Mindy yelled out to the hallway as they walked farther away from her earshot.
They had their lunch, lugged the kids back to their townhouse and the couple were about to fall asleep when Piper threw the door open and walked in.
"Woah! What the hell happened to that knock before you enter rule?!" Mindy demanded.
"I wanted to catch you two before you take your four hour "nap" and then come out this room growling about me and CJ about doing our homework." Piper accompanied the word nap with air quotes, to which Mindy rolled her eyes.
"It's more like a guiding stern voice than a growl. God wouldn't give anyone the voice to growl at a child." Casey answered smartly.
"Anyway," Piper started, jumping on the bed, CJ following behind her. Mindy rolled her eyes as her children snuggled their way in between her and Casey.
"No, I will not have this convo with CJ in the room Casey, that is your job." Mindy demanded as Piper opened her mouth but no words came out.
"Relax, mother. We are not talking about putting the p in the v." Piper smartly answered.
"What do you know about putting the p in the v?!" Casey quickly answered back.
"Why aren't you guys just saying penis and vagina? I'm ten, not two." CJ finally butted in.
"Oh my God, my baby boy did not just say that. Casey, what the hell did you tell him?" Mindy shrieked.
"Dad told me the basics, mom. Also, were in the city, I go to school. I hear stuff." He said as Piper reached over and slapped his arm.
"Anyway, the reason we came in here is because we want to know why mom doesn't go to church with us or why she doesn't pray when we do." Piper let out, and Mindy faked a smile while shooting her eyes over to Casey.
"Well, that's a very good question." Casey commented, crossing his arms. "Mom doesn't really believe in anything specific."
"What do you mean specific? I thought there was only one God." CJ asked.
"Ok, I'll take it from here, Pastor." Mindy intervened, placing a hand on Casey's knee.
"Guys, I don't feel any sort of feelings when it comes to church or God. I'm kind of like Switzerland." Mindy said, hoping they wouldn't ask anything else.
"So are you going to hell?" Piper asked, tears welling in her eyes. "Cause it would suck if were all in heaven and you were in hell, like burning all the color off your skin."
"I appreciate the concern, Piper. No one really knows who or what is controlling or creating all of us. Like that time I told you to have faith that your brother was going to be a girl because you really wanted a sister, we all have faith in what we choice to believe and what makes us happy. And for this mama, Christianity doesn't make me happy, just a certain Christian man." Mindy sat up in confidence, shooting a wink Casey's way.
"So we just can have faith in anything and then follow whatever that is?" Piper asked, unsure she understood.
"Well, as a pastor; I can't say you can have faith in anything. God still loves your mom even if she doesn't have faith. Just like one day you two can choose what you have faith in and that is what will make you happy." Piper nodded, and CJ looked back at his sister.
"So if My Xbox makes me happy, I can have faith in my Xbox?" CJ asked, a smile growing on his face.
"No, you idiot." Piper chastised. "Do you think that your Xbox created the earth? Because if you did, you need to ride the short bus to school."
"Ok, lets not get personal, and no, CJ, we are talking about having faith in a higher power, something you can not see but you chose to believe is there." Casey calmly said, "Also, Piper, don't call your brother an idiot."
"You tell us to speak our truth, and truthfully he is acting like an idiot." Piper snapped back.
"Ok trailer track princess. SeaBiscuit called, he wants his teeth back." CJ argued back, rising from his place on the bed.
"Well you better get the ambulance on the phone because mom can't repair broken kidneys." Piper said the last part and punched him in the side.
"Ow!" CJ cried, before reaching over and pulling Piper's ponytail. "Brat!"
"Well that conversation really answered their questions." Mindy sarcastically told Casey as they watched CJ run out of the room, Piper on his tail.
"You know we have to go after them and talk about this all over again, right?" Casey asked and Mindy took a deep breath and looked around, "yah."