This was just a little something stupid I came up with.
I don't own Death Note.
No one reviewed my other Death Note story ("Love Apples") but I thought I'd take another stab at DN and put this up anyway.
I don't know if you've read My Immortal, but I hope you've at least heard of it... God, that thing is awful... I read it all in one day; I think I lost 98 percent of my brain cells.
So, enjoy "The Real First Kira". I hope it makes you laugh - oh, and review!
...the infamous Harry Potter fanfiction that has become known across the globe as the world's worst fanfiction ever. Those who like to spread the word of it often point to the fact that if one searches "worst fanfic ever" in Google, it appears as the first result.
The story in question is supposedly written by Tara Gilesbie, who is either a retarded twelve-year-old girl or the most determined troll in history...
"Hey, Sayu!" Light called to his sister over the TV. He wouldn't dare call her in here if their parents had been home, but luckily, they weren't. "We're on the news!"
"Really?" She poked her head into the room to take a look. The words "My Immortal" appeared on the screen, and next to it was a dark outline of a person with a white question mark on it.
It is not even known whether or not Tara Gilesbie is the author's actual name, as they misspell it on many occasions.
"Oh. You mean like that." Sayu walked over to the couch and sat next to Light.
It is doubtful that the author, whoever he or she is, is just a front: many other websites, such as MySpace and several forums, consolidate her identity. The person behind Tara would then have to go to the trouble of creating the persona of Tara's friend Raven, as well as make a fanfiction-dot-net account for her and write her stories.
Raven's two stories, while slightly more readable, are not much better than Tara's infamous "My Immortal".
"That's got to be the first time your work's been insulted, right, Light?" Sayu playfully poked her older brother on the arm.
"Actually, that's a compliment," he replied. "You know that was the point."
"True."
They would also then have to stage the fight between the two authors, which was apparently over a sweater.
The younger girl grinned, though she said, "I still want that back."
While there has never been much doubt that Tara and Raven are two real people, at least in the minds of us here at Sakura TV, whether or not those are their real names... the question that is the topic of a heated debate right now is whether or not the person behind the story "My Immortal" is also the person who hides behind the name Kira.
Sayu's jaw dropped. "What?"
There has been a total of nearly a hundred suicides suspected to be caused by an attempt to read this God-awful fanfiction. The story was originally published in 2006, and the suicides have happened all during that time. However, the majority of them have happened since Kira's appearance.
As a matter of fact, more than seventy of them happened last week alone.
"Light, what if I'm Kira and I don't know it?" she shrieked.
"Sayu, calm down." Light rolled his eyes.
We suspect that Kira may be linked to these suicides because recent evidence has shown…
Her older brother turned off the TV, and then told her, "Everyone knows that Kira only kills criminals. And anyway, he can only kill with heart attacks. Criminals or not, these people committed suicide."
"Oh… yeah… You're right, Light, just like always. I wish I was smart like you."
She seemed comforted by that, but even more so when he spoke again.
"Trust me, Sayu. There's no way anyone you or I know could be Kira."
- -
Sakura Inoguchi
Holly Watashen
Yusuke Hatake
Saito Hanaka
Kamira Johnson
John Smith
Tony Tahaka
Between 6:30 and 9:30 PM, reads partway through "My Immortal" and commits suicide, leaving the story up and the computer screen on.
- Kuramastrass -