~* This is my new oneshot, slightly inspired by Caution, Wet Floors by XxRandom NemesisxX but it's completely different. It's a humorous oneshot of the confrontation between Anakin and Padmé on Mustafar with Obi-Wan, Threepio, Artoo and Palpatine thrown into the mix. Reviews are much appreciated and it's not meant to be taken seriously.
Watch Your Step
By xXJedi Knight BlazeXx
Mustafar was a volcanic planet lying in the Outer Rim where no one would even think to look for anyone and Anakin Skywalker hated this planet. Then again, nowadays, he hated everything but that's another story. Anyway Anakin walked down the platform toward the Nabooian style starship as it landed because he knew exactly who was going to be on it.
When Anakin came to a stop and the starship opened, he noticed that the platform in front of the starship was shimmering in the light of the river of lava. He paid no attention to that as the boarding stairs?... lowered and Padmé Amidala walked down the stairs and over to join them.
Why does that starship have stairs? Anakin wondered silently but decided not to bother thinking about it as he walked over to join Padmé.
Padmé gazed at him before hugging him as they came toward each other. "Anakin, I was so worried about you! Obi-Wan... told me terrible things!" she said.
"What things?"
"He said... you turned to the Dark Side. That you... killed Younglings!"
"Obi-Wan is trying to turn you against me," Anakin said angrily.
"He cares about us," Padmé whispered.
"Us?"
"He knows. He wants to help you. Anakin, all I want is your love," Padmé said.
Blah, blah, blah, you know what's coming so why should I bother repeating everything that they say to each other, it's getting on my nerves. Ahem, anyway, I think I will skip over this part and get to the part that matters.
Padmé started crying, what a wimp!... "Anakin, you're breaking my heart! You're going down a path I cannot follow."
"Because of Obi-Wan?" Anakin demanded angrily. Gee, he really needs to go to Anger Management classes. "And I don't need to go to anger management classes.
Padmé paused in her crying. "What are you talking about Anakin?" she asked.
"Nothing and you never answered my question," Anakin snapped.
"Oh right," Padmé said. "Um, what was I supposed to say next?" The script was thrust into her face and she read it. "Oh right. Because of what you've done…what you plan to do! Stop! Stop now…come back…I love you."
Anakin glanced over his shoulder just as Obi-Wan appeared at the top of the stairs and he grew angry. "Liar! You're with him! You brought him here to kill me!" he screamed. Gee, I was right, he really needs anger management. "And I DON'T need anger management!"
"Why do you keep yelling that?" Padmé asked.
Anakin glared at her before glancing up as Obi-Wan missed the first step and rolled down the other three steps before skidding across the platform as if the platform was covered with water.
Anakin couldn't help it and he burst out laughing so hard that he was clutching his sides. Padmé glanced over her shoulder at Obi-Wan and also started to laugh until she was on the ground from laughing so hard.
"It's not funny!" Obi-Wan exclaimed struggling to get to his feet but he kept slipping on the platform. "Blast, how in the world can a platform on Mustafar of all places be covered with water?"
Anakin also fell to the ground and started laughing like crazy, clutching his side. By the time he and Padmé got control of their laughter, Threepio and Artoo appeared.
"What's going onnnnn?" Threepio yelled as he missed the first step, rolled down the steps and went skidding to where Obi-Wan was located, he was closely followed by an angry Artoo who was whistling with rage as he skidded across the platform.
Anakin and Padmé started laughing again so hard that they couldn't get back up.
"It's not funny!" Obi-Wan and Threepio yelled at the same time.
"That ship should have a 'watch your step' sign," Anakin gasped still struggling to get control of his laughter.
"I've been trying to have one installed for three months now but no one wants to do it," Padmé gasped.
At that moment, another ship appeared and landed before the boarding stairs opened and Palpatine, himself, appeared at the top of them. "What's going on here?" he demanded. "Why is that damn Jedi still alive?" His livid face was even more ugly than ever before and his yellow eyes gleamed with malice. "I'm not ugly!" he yelled to no one in particular.
Anakin was still laughing at Obi-Wan's misfortune and Palpatine glared at him. "You have a job to do, Lord Vader, stop that laughter this instant," he snapped angrily.
"Gee, any yet people say I need anger management," Anakin said in between each laugh that escaped his lips.
Palpatine scowled before stepping down from the ramp but he missed that first step and went rolling down from the ship. "Ahhh!" he yelled as he skidded across the wet platform, directly at Obi-Wan, Threepio and Artoo who rolled out of the way in time. Palpatine screeched in fury as he skidded right off the platform.
"Curse you, Jedi!" Palpatine screamed as he crashed into the river of lava. "Blub, blub, blub," were the last things you could hear coming from him.
This caused a fresh mirth to escape Anakin and Padmé's lips and they, though they had barely managed to get to their feet, collapsed onto the ground and began laughing like crazy.
By the time they got control of their laughter, nothing was left of Palpatine and Obi-Wan, Threepio and Artoo were still trying to get to their feet. Anakin got to his feet before gazing around, frowning.
"I don't get this," he muttered.
"You don't get what?" Padmé asked.
Anakin gestured around them. "We're standing on the only dry part of this platform but I don't understand how the rest of the platform could be covered with water," he said.
"Who knows?"
Anakin glanced toward the part of the platform that Palpatine had skidded off. "You know, I think I'll return to the light side," he said.
"What made you change your mind?" Obi-Wan asked finally managing to get to his feet and helping Threepio and Artoo up as well.
"Simple," Anakin replied with a shrug. "The dark side is full of a bunch of clumsy idiots." As if to emphasis his point, he gestured to where Palpatine was last seen burning in the river of lava.
"Truly," Padmé agreed.
"I could have told you that," Obi-Wan grumbled.
a/n what do you think?
Blaze: well that was a little oneshot I came up with
Darth: I liked it
Blaze: ha, I thought it was funny
Darth: how in the world did they get water on Mustafar?
Blaze: how should I know?
Darth: it's your story
Blaze: and your point is…
Darth: (scowls, slices Palpypie in half and stalks off)
Palpypie's Ghost: what did I do?
Blaze: (laughs) reviews are once again really appreciated and I hope that you liked this little oneshot.