Bobo ll and

Doodah ll!

Artemis is teaching Physics at oxford university, when all of a sudden butler comes running in…

Butler: Come quick, it's Minerva.

Artemis: What about her?

Butler: For a genius, you really are dense.

Artemis: Being a professor really wears you out so don't you call me dense you son of a bitch!

Butler: Oh for gods sake Minerva is having the baby.

Artemis:……Ok. I'll be there as soon as the lesson is finished.

Butler: That's over an hour! You'll miss the birth!

Artemis: Exactly I don't really want to see a baby's head poking out of Minerva's arse thank you very much. Please tell her I'll be there about three ish.

Butler grabs Artemis by the collar, puts him in their car and drives to Minerva's house. By the time they get there, Minerva is lying on the bed holding not one, but two little babies. She lives in France so it took a while to get there. Don't ask. All the other characters are gathered round her except Holly who is sat is a chair sulking and holding her baby. Artemis bursts through the door.

Artemis: Oh my god. I thought you were having a baby!

Minerva: Say hello to Bobo the second and Doodah the second!

Artemis: Holy crap.

Interviewer: Artemis, you're only fourteen and already you have three children. How does that feel?

Artemis: Oh god, yeah I forgot about the other one.

Artemis walks over to greet Holly.

Artemis: How are you?

Holly: Fucking depressed. I haven't had sex in over a week.

Artemis: Don't worry, we can do something about that. And how's Artemisia?

Holly: Bloody annoying. Artemis, Minerva's really pissing me off. She's getting all the attention.

Artemis: Aww, are you feeling unappreciated again? Why didn't you call me we could of sorted something out.

Holly: You cant fucking sort anything out. Not with this pile of shit crying and whining all the time! I just cant handle breast feeding either.

Artemis: I could help you with that…

Minerva: ARTEMIS! You're not paying enough attention to ME! I'm the one that's just had twins here!

Artemis: OH GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAKE! I CANT BE DOING WITH THIS! IM TOO BLOODY CLEVER TO WASTE ANY OF MY TIME BABYSITTING! Apart from when you need help with breast feeding Holly, that I'm fine with.

Artemis stormed out the room.

The end!