When I looked out my window the next morning, the silver Volvo was in the driveway, as it had been the last two days.
He was earlier today, though. I hurried to get ready, grabbing my jeans off the floor and a bra from the arm of the rocking chair and darting into the bathroom with my bag. I pulled my brush through my messy hair as I leaned over the sink, thankful that my straight hair was easy to fix. The toothbrush almost fell from my mouth as I haphazardly pulled my sweater on over my white t-shirt, but I bit down on it until my hands were free and I could continue my inadequate brushing. Oh well, I was having breakfast after this, anyway.
I crashed into the wall as I tried putting on my tennis shoes while walking, eventually toppling over and landing on the hard floor with a loud thud. I blinked, momentarily dazed by the sudden fall. But then I jumped back to my feet and almost ran headlong down the stairs to grab a quick bowl of cereal and greet him outside.
This had to be the side effects of love. Love. The word felt strange and terrifying on my tongue, but so right. I was never this reckless; I always took my time and did things thoroughly. But all of a sudden I just couldn't do anything fast enough. It was painful every moment that passed when he wasn't right with me. But did he even love me back? That was certainly something to worry about, but for now, it took all of my concentration to eat my cereal without choking to death. He obviously didn't hate me, so that was good.
Approximately two minutes later, I dumped my empty bowl in the kitchen sink – almost shattering it in my haste - and grabbed my book bag from the back of my chair, stuffing my binder into it as I headed for the door.
I stepped outside, and he was there, leaning casually against his car with my favorite crooked smile on his lips. My heart did a summersault in my chest.
"Good morning," I said breathlessly.
He nodded. "Good morning."
As I slowly approached him, still tired from running down the stairs, he straightened up and extended his hand to take my bag. I slipped it off my shoulder and handed it to him, and he placed it in the trunk of the Volvo, next to his bag.
I watched him, and was still blown away by the utter grace of his quick movements. I was about as graceless as they came.
"So, what was going on in there?" Edward asked then, coming around and opening the passenger door for me. I blushed as I climbed inside.
"Umm…nothing," I replied in a tiny voice as he got in the driver's side a second later.
He chuckled. "Really? It sounded like there was a marathon taking place in your hallway."
"Oh." I frowned, struggling to come up with a response that made me sound somewhat normal. "I fell."
He laughed again. "Of course."
My blush darkened as he started the engine and pulled out of the driveway.
"But really," he started a minute later, "I'm curious; is that all? You were making quite a racket. I was worried that you might have injured yourself, and I'd have to drive you to the emergency room." He shook his head. "I'm sure my father would remember you."
I tried to sink into the leather seat and disappear. "Well, I'm fine." I hesitated, biting on my lower lip until I almost cut through the skin. "You heard all that?'
"Bella, I can hear things miles away. But you didn't answer my question."
I looked up, and he was staring at me inquisitively, with just a hint of that slightly frustrated gleam to his honey-gold eyes. I sighed.
"No. That wasn't all."
I expected him to ask the obvious 'what else?', but he just stared at me for another minute – causing my face to redden even further – before looking back to the road ahead.
"Hmm…I thought not."
Another minute passed in silence; awkward, uncomfortable silence on my part. Why did I always have to make myself sound like such an idiot? I should at least be able to frame a coherent response to the simplest questions. What happened to being diplomatic?
"Bella."
His voice pulled me from my train of thought, and I unthinkingly blurted out, "What?"
My voice was too high; I blushed again. Thankfully, he didn't seem to notice. Or if he did, he didn't say anything.
"What are you thinking?"
"Umm…" I paused, deliberating whether or not to tell him. He would know if I was lying, but I would sound even stupider if I told him the truth. But suddenly, I remembered something, and was saved. "Oh."
"What is it?" He glanced over at me again, raising his eyebrows as he took in the ridiculous grin now plastered on my lips. "Bella?"
I turned my head and looked back at him, still smiling. "I just remembered, it's my turn today. I don't have to answer you." My smile widened. "Now you get to answer me."
His expression changed. He frowned, narrowing his eyes slightly. I could tell he'd been hoping that I wouldn't remember. Well, too bad.
A minute later, he sighed. "Very well. A deal is a deal. And you did put up with my ruthless interrogations quite well." His lips twitched. "I would have expected a bit more of a fight from you."
My smile faded. "I don't really fight back," I mumbled pathetically.
"Which is why I have to look out for you."
I felt small and stupid again. He didn't sound like he minded, but he was probably just being nice. He had to look after me, so I didn't get myself killed or something. It sounded like a burden to me. Great. My fleeting moment of excitement was squashed.
I turned my face away and looked out the window, watching the dark rain streak past the windows as he drove. Recklessly fast, as always, but I didn't mind anymore. Not much.
I jumped when something as cold as ice brushed my hand. I quickly looked down, just in time to see him pull his hand away, back to the steering wheel. My eyes met his, and he looked away.
"I'm sorry," he murmured.
"Don't be," I responded automatically. "You just startled me."
He glanced at me again, and frowned. "I've said something, haven't I? You weren't like this a minute ago."
I shook my head. "No, I'm fine. Really."
"If you say so." I could tell that I hadn't convinced him. "Please, continue."
"Hmm?"
"I was under the impression that you had a few questions for me."
"Oh…right." I felt the brief flutter of excitement course through me again, and I smiled in spite of myself, momentarily forgetting my sadness. I was free to ask him anything I wanted, and he had to answer, because he'd made me answer every single thing that he asked, whether or not I had wanted to. And more than often, I hadn't wanted to.
"Umm….all right…" I couldn't decide what I wanted to ask first. There were so many things that I didn't know about him – it was like I didn't know him at all. But I reminded myself that I knew he was a...vampire – I could hardly think the word - and no one outside of his family knew that. His biggest secret was out; he shouldn't have any problems with any of my questions. But then why was I so afraid all of a sudden?
"What's wrong?"
I glanced up at him and dropped my gaze in the same instant.
"Nothing." A small frown turned down the corners of my lips. "I'm just trying to decide what to ask."
"Why don't you start with the basics?"
"Okay." I hesitated. "What's your full name?"
He snickered. "Very basic."
Embarrassed, I started, "But you just said to-", but he held up his hand to silence me.
"I know. I'm sorry." He grinned. "My name is Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. The Masen was my name when I was human, and obviously it became Cullen when I was adopted into Carlisle's family. Next."
"Oh." Edward Anthony…A slight blush crept onto my cheeks. "That's a pretty name."
He laughed. "Next."
"Umm…how old are you? And don't say seventeen. I already know that you're seventeen forever. I mean, how many years old are you really?"
I watched anxiously as his face darkened, and a frown replaced his smile.
"Next."
I was startled by his sudden change in mood, but I was stubborn enough to resist his rejection. "No. Tell me. You made me answer everything."
"We're here," was all he answered. I looked out the window and saw that we were parked in the school parking lot. I hadn't even noticed that the car had stopped moving. The trip must have taken all of five minutes.
"Edward, why won't you tell me?" I demanded, turning my attention back to him. He killed the engine, but didn't move to get out. Finally, he sighed.
"I'll tell you later."
"Promise?" I could hear the desire in my voice. Pathetic.
"Promise."
"All right." I hesitated again, now discouraged. I still had so many questions, but I was more intimidated than I had been when we'd started. I should have known that he would bend the rules to his liking.
I glanced around the car, distracting myself while I thought. The clock on the dashboard caught my eye, and I blinked, making sure I'd read the time right.
"Why is it so early?" I wondered aloud.
He glanced down at me from the corner of his eye, and I thought I saw a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"Because it is. Because time moves and minutes go by, and it just happens to be earlier than you thought."
"No," I started. "I mean, why are we here so early?" I paused. "Why did you come to my house so early today?"
"I have my reasons."
I frowned. "That's not fair. You have to tell me. It's part of the deal."
He sighed deeply and tightened his grip on the steering wheel. I watched, curious and anxious.
"Remember what I told you driving back from Port Angeles?"
"Which part?" So many things had happened on the drive.
"I don't like being away from you. It makes me uncomfortable. I like knowing that you're safe."
"Oh." I was caught off guard by the statement, as I had been the first time he'd said it. "You did say that." I looked down at my hands. He was waiting outside my house for who knows how long, just to make sure that I was alright… "And I told you that I feel the exact same way."
"Even though you shouldn't."
I huffed. "Well, too bad. As I said, it's too late. I'm in too deep."
He took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly. "It's never too late, but I'm not going to fight you. You're old enough to make your own decisions, and smart enough to realize the danger of this situation."
"But, as you love to point out, not smart enough to do anything about it," I retorted.
He rolled his eyes. "You know it's true."
"I don't care."
"I wish you did."
"Well I don't." I crossed my arms. "And I have another question for you."
"Go ahead."
"Why do you worry so much about me? Or, moreover, why am I even remotely interesting to you? I've got to be the most boring person I know."
"Again, you don't see yourself clearly at all. And I like worrying about you. It gives me something to do during the long and repetitive hours of school."
"But, in the scheme of things, six hours must not really be that long to you who lives forever, if my calculations are correct." I raised my eyebrows.
He sighed. "You would be surprised."
I glanced at the clock again. Only five minutes had gone by. We still had a good twenty minutes before anyone else would even begin to show up. I was surprised I'd been able to get up and ready so quickly at such an earlier time.
"What are you thinking?"
I looked away from the clock and back at him. "You asked me that about ten minutes ago, you know?"
"But you didn't answer." He sounded annoyed by that.
"But I don't have to." I was enjoying the fact that I had him at my command. I didn't know if I would ever get the chance again, so I might as well have fun with it and torture him a bit.
"That one shouldn't count." He frowned. "Remember, I'm used to knowing what people are thinking. It still feels strange having to ask you."
I shrugged. "Oh well. You can ask me tomorrow and I'll answer."
His sigh almost sounded like a growl. I grinned.
"You are so maddening."
"Glad to hear it."
"Fine. Keep going with the questions."
"Okay. Hmmm…what do you remember about being human?"
"I don't." He leaned back into his seat and turned his head slightly in my direction so that I could see his grimace. "You're asking all the wrong questions."
"You don't remember anything?" I pressed, not willing to give up.
He closed his eyes and pressed his fingers against his forehead, thinking. I waited, and after a minute or so he said, "All that I remember is that I was an only child, and I grew up in Chicago with my parents. I know my father had a good job, because we had more money that most people. My mother didn't work." He opened his eyes. "And I know she had hair like mine, and eyes, too."
"Is that all?"
His frown deepened. "Yes, Bella."
I bit down on my lip, staring at him curiously. "You really do lose your memories when you become a…vampire, don't you?"
He nodded once.
I chewed harder. "Do you remember their names? Your parents?"
He hesitated, but answered, "Edward and Elizabeth Masen."
"You were named after your father?" I guessed.
"It would seem so." He shrugged. "It was a common thing in my day to have the same name as an elder family member."
"And when was that?" I asked, hoping he would slip. I tried to think if I was named after anyone. I didn't know anyone named Isabella; just my middle name, Marie, for my grandmother…
He scowled. "No."
"Fine." So he was going to play mean. He'd promised though…so I would know soon enough. "What's your favorite color?"
He glanced over at me and his expression changed again. I'd never known anyone that could switch moods so frequently, and naturally.
"You think that's a question I'll answer?" His eyes were suddenly light, amused.
My mouth dropped open. "Hey, what do you mean? You said to give you easier questions!"
He laughed aloud. "You believe things far too quickly. And, blue."
"Hmmm?"
"My favorite color is blue."
"Oh." I blinked. "It's mine, too."
"I thought you didn't have a favorite color," he accused.
"I don't, permanently. But today, it's blue." I pointed to my dark navy shirt. "Remember, I tend to dress according to my favorite at that moment."
"So, if you were wearing orange pants one day, I would know that you were feeling rather orange that morning?" he teased.
I rolled my eyes. "Why would I ever have a pair of orange pants?"
He shrugged. "My sister does."
"Alice?"
He nodded.
"Well, then she's obviously braver than I am."
"Too self-conscious?" He was trying not to laugh, and completely failing.
"Yeah. But even if I wasn't, I still wouldn't have orange pants."
"Whatever you say, Bella," he chuckled.
I sighed. "Anyway…"
He was silent, but a mocking grin still danced on his lips. "Yes, I'm waiting."
"What are your favorite books?"
"I'll read just about anything. My house is better stocked than most libraries I've been to. And Carlisle collects books, so there's always a new one to read."
"Have you read every book in your house?" I was intrigued by his obvious appreciation of reading. Everyone I ever attempted to start a book chat with just rolled their eyes and called me a nerd. Which, honestly wasn't that far off when it came to me and my books, but it still wasn't fun having a one-sided conversation.
"Not quite all of them," he answered. "I've been a bit…distracted lately, and haven't had the time to read."
"What's distracting you?"
He ignored my question. "I do hope to finish them before he brings home his next load, or I'll fall even further behind." He pursed his lips. "But for favorites…I really can't say. I just love books in general."
"I do, too," I said, slightly annoyed that he'd ignored yet another of my questions. He was completely breaking the rules that I hadn't been allowed to escape.
"I must say though," he continued, unaware of my pouting, "I did find Bram Stoker's
Dracula highly amusing and entertaining." He smiled at me wryly. "It was interesting to see what the world's perception of vampires was. Not at all correct, of course." He laughed, amusing himself. I had to smile.
"Oh?"
He shrugged. "As I've told you, we real vampires don't sleep in coffins, turn into bats, or burn in sunlight." He shook his head. "We don't even have fangs. That must be a disappointment."
"Not really."
He chuckled. "You certainly are very strange. Not bothered at all by the fact that you're completely alone with a vampire, and comfortable questioning him about certain aspects of his potentially murderous life. Are you really that brave – or stupid for that matter? Or have you had experience with other vampires in the past?"
I was surprised by his casual use of the word – I could hardly force it off my tongue - and wasn't able to be properly angry. I sighed.
He looked down, his expression curious. "What?"
I stared back, debating whether or not to respond. While it was admittedly giving in, I decided I could grant him one answer.
"It's nothing…I was just wondering, how you're so easily able to call yourself vampire, and not have the word catch on your tongue." I hoped he wouldn't get angry, or think that I was scared. I didn't know which was worse.
He frowned, dropping his eyes to his hands. I waited, biting on my lip again. The skin would be gone soon.
"It's what I am," he finally murmured. "Whether I like it or not, I don't have a choice in the matter. I've just forced myself to get used to it." He raised his head, and I met his eyes again. They were smoldering, as always, but dark – reflecting his anguish. I had a sudden urge to reach out and touch him, comfort him, but I was too afraid that he might push me away.
"I'm sorry," I answered quietly. "That must be a hard thing. You're very strong."
The corner of his mouth raised in a half-hearted smile. "It doesn't matter. I shouldn't fight it." He sighed. "But thank you, though."
I shook my head. "I shouldn't have said anything. You were happier a minute ago."
He shrugged. "I'm fine. It's nothing. Besides," he smiled again, a bit more genuinely, "I like knowing what you're thinking. No matter what it is. It helps me feel…closer to you."
My heart jumped. He must've heard it, because he chuckled quietly. I blushed.
"Then I'll keep telling you," I mumbled a minute later. "Everything."
"Everything?"
I hesitated. "Most things. Like I said before, you may not want to know some of the things I think. I don't want to hurt you."
"You won't hurt me." I glanced over at him, and his eyes were unexpectedly gentle. My breath caught in a sharp gasp, and I quickly dropped my eyes to my hands.
"Bella?"
I waited for my heart to slow down, and then I slowly raised my gaze. He was staring at me in confusion, and worry.
"Are you all right?"
"Yes, I'm sorry."
"For what?"
I shook my head. "Nothing. Nevermind."
The look of confusion returned. I sighed.
"What is it?"
"I don't know. I'm just thinking…another question."
He smiled slightly. "Let's hear it."
I bit my lip again. "Your brothers and sisters; how did they meet?" I looked down again, but then quickly back up. "You said they're all together, right?'
He nodded. "Married."
I blinked. "Oh." That was a little surprising, but I supposed it was to be expected.
"Why do you ask?"
I shrugged. "I'm just curious. I mean, were they human when they knew each other? Or already…"
"I'll tell you another time," he promised.
"Why not now?" I stared up at him, pleading.
"Because, firstly, it's getting late. Everyone is starting to arrive."
I glanced outside the window, surprised to see how many people were already here, leaving their cars and heading toward the school. I never seemed to notice anything when I was with Edward, anything but him, that is. It was just so easy for us to get lost in our own little world.
"And secondly," he continued, making me return my gaze to him, "because the stories aren't really mine to tell. I know you're curious, but be patient. I promised I would tell you someday, right?"
I nodded. His statement made it sound as if he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. I liked the feeling of permanence, security. I knew very well by now that I couldn't possibly live without him.
"Alice and Jasper's is truly remarkable. I'll bet Alice would tell it to you if you asked."
I stared at him in astonishment. "But I haven't even met her."
He shrugged. "Alice is special that way. I don't think she would be offended."
"Why? Have you read her mind or something? Has she thought about me?"
He pursed his lips. "Something like that."
He glanced down at me, noticed my expression, and laughed. "Well she doesn't hate you, so you don't have to worry about that." He released a deep breath. "Alice has a special gift, like me. And, being a mind reader, well, I have a better understanding of her than anyone else. Except for Jasper, that is." He laughed again. "He would definitely argue that case with me."
I tried to smile, but wasn't quite able. I was focused on something else, something he'd said. "Wait, so Alice…can she read minds, too?"
He sighed. "No, that's just me."
"Then what can she do?' I turned towards him, full-on, intrigued.
He stared at me for a long moment, and then looked away. "Another time. We should go; I don't want you to be late again."
"Fine." I pouted in silence as he unlocked his door and got out, and then came around to open my door for me. I climbed out too fast, my foot got caught under the seat and I stumbled forward, headed face-first for the concrete.
Edward caught me, of course, and steadied me before quickly letting go. I sighed.
He got our bags out of the trunk, but to my great surprise, he didn't give me mine. Instead, he slung it over his shoulder and carried his own in his hand. I looked away, fighting a smile but not stopping my blush. Thank god my bag wasn't bright pink with lavender flowers on it. The simple brown material blended nicely with his jacket, I noticed with secret satisfaction.
Everyone still stared at us as we walked under the canopy of the school, but I hardly noticed them. It wasn't raining yet, but the heavy purple clouds threatened a downpour soon. I shrugged my jacket on, zipping it up to my neck as we walked.
"I'll see you at lunch," I said once we'd reached the door to my first class. "And no listening today." I narrowed my eyes in what I hoped looked like a scolding glare.
He smiled his crooked smile. "Promise."
Before he left, he brushed the hair out my face, hesitant as before, and gently stroked my cheek, causing my heart to splutter hyperactively. He chuckled as he handed me my bag. "Lunch, then."
I watched him walk away, my heart still pounding furiously in my chest. What had I ever done to have such an amazing person in my life? It was mind-boggling; a concept almost impossible to grasp. I was ordinary, and he was anything but. I was a klutz, and he was the most graceful thing on two legs. I was boring, and he was enthralling. And I was completely in love with him.
I watched until his retreating form disappeared from view, far too quickly, and turned with a smile into my English classroom. Lunch, hmm? I already had a few more questions that I couldn't wait to ask him.
(A/N:) awwwww...I love those two sooooo much!!! *hugs them tightly*
