Well, I was bored last night so I wrote this random fic. Read if you want to, if you like it I'd really appreciate if you check out my other fics too :).
Don't own Naruto blah blah blah
Warning: While this is rated T is probably a hard T. Some strong language and sexual references.
Cynicism
Why does she have to be so loud? She's always so loud and bossy and it really pisses me off sometimes. If I ever do anything she doesn't approve of I can pretty much count on not hearing anything for about a week on account of the sheer volume of her voice when she yells.
I've always held sort of a cynical view of dating. It always seemed like too much of a bother to have to deal with everything that went a long with it. I always though dating was kind of pointless. Maybe that's because I've never met anyone that I really liked all that much around here.
I thought that maybe the reason I had that view on dating is that I never actually really dated anyone. Everyone else was all obsessed with it and I always overheard the girls gossiping about who's going out with who and all that crap. Maybe that's how I got into the mess I'm in now, because I had never dated and was curious why it was such a big deal to a lot of people.
Well actually, let me just clarify something first. When I say I never really cared about dating that's not saying I didn't care about girls. A lot of most of my days were devoted to thinking about them and I think I was fairly average in that regard. But this also is probably another reason I got into this mess.
Because I had never gone out with a girl a lot of the guys started making annoying little jokes about how maybe I was gay and the reason I didn't have a girlfriend was because I wasn't interested in that. Well first of all that's not true at all, like I said before I definitely am interested in girls and I am not gay. This is probably another reason I started going out with her, because I just wanted them to shut up.
What's was even worse then them calling me gay though, was when they started accusing me of fucking my dog. Apparently, since I spent so much more time with Akamaru then anyone else that meant that we were lovers or something. Now that's just disgusting. They even went as far to say that I made him turn into me and I quite literally fucked myself. I had to beat them up a couple times for saying this. Not only is it completely not true, its just plain wrong. What kind of narcissistic bastard would fuck an exact copy of himself!? I hate them so much for just putting that image in my head. I'm also just shocked that they actually go around thinking about stuff like that. I wouldn't be surprised if that brat Naruto went home and used that weird shadow clone technique and had a massive orgy. Gah, now I hate myself for getting that image in my head.
So let's get back to dating so I can get these insanely disturbing images out of my mind. I was pretty hesitant to just go and ask someone out because for one thing, I didn't exactly like any of the girls here, and another was that I was kind of awkward around girls and I'm pretty sure that most of them hated me any way and if I asked they would just laugh and say no.
But in the end I ended up going out with Ino. I don't know why I asked her out. I've always sort of hated her; she was just to loud and bossy. But I decided that I wanted to know what dating someone exclusively was like so I decided to ask her out. I thought that maybe if we were boyfriend and girlfriend she would be a little nicer to me or maybe if I got to know her a little better I would actually like her.
Boy was I wrong. It's not to say that she doesn't have any redeeming qualities. She can be pretty nice and caring sometimes, and yes, she is pretty damn hot. But despite these few redeeming qualities I think I hate her more now. On the surface we both are somewhat similar, we're both pretty loud and we both can be pretty obnoxious sometimes, but when you get down to it we just don't work at all.
I'm not really sure why she said yes. I'm pretty sure she just said yes so she can use me. Like me, she hadn't exactly gone out with anyone else yet. She had gone out with a couple people for maybe a week but then it always ended for no reason that I could see. I think she said yes so she could parade me around to show everyone that she had a boyfriend and she could go to all the social events with a date instead of going alone. If this wasn't why said yes then I don't know why she did. I'm fairly certain the only guy she actually likes is that prick Sasuke, and since he ran off with that pedophile Orochi-something, she pretty much has no one of interest in Konoha. It's not like I really cared if she was using me since I was pretty much just using her as well.
The first couple of weeks were decent enough I guess. We argued a little but I think we both were trying to make an effort to get along and like each other so we avoided as many arguments as we possibly could. I actually liked dating for the first week or two. It was pretty enjoyable to go on a date every once in a while and go see a movie or something. It was also nice to always have some one that was waiting for you when you got back from a mission or finished training that wasn't your family. For the first couple of weeks I was actually pretty happy with dating and my views on it started to change a little.
But then things started to go horribly wrong. As we started to like each other more and more she just got more and more clingy. When we had first started to go out she was happy seeing me for a short time once a day and have a date a couple times a week. But as she started to like me more, she wanted to spend everyone single waking moment with me. She wanted to do every thing with me. I couldn't do anything unless she said it was ok first. Forget about going and doing things with other people. I had to spend all my time with her and just her. She got mad every time I would hang out with some of my other friends or every time I had some down time and I didn't go and immediately find her.
If the only thing wrong was that she wanted to spend too much time together then I probably could have lived with that. But no, there were so many other things that annoyed me about this whole dating thing with Ino. For one thing, since I was her boyfriend, apparently now I was supposed to buy everything for her. I had to pay for all her meals and when she wanted to go shopping she tried to make me pay for all the clothes and makeup and crap that she bought. She even started to get mad when I didn't go and by her something when she hadn't asked like it was required or something. I'm pretty sure I ran out of all my money I had been saving since I had become a ninja in about 2 weeks. It's not normal to buy this much stuff for your girlfriend is it? Although I guess this could kind of be my fault. I could have just said 'no, I won't buy you that perfume that smells so bad that I'm going to have to hunt down and kill the person that made it if you wear it,' but instead I just said ok, not wanting to deal with her bitching at me.
And then she also started to get mad at me for little things, like the fact I wouldn't say 'I love you' to her. I don't see what the big deal is with this. I didn't love her so why should I say it? We had only been going out for a couple weeks so I didn't think it had progressed so far that we now loved each other. Maybe our definitions of the word were just different. I blame all the other girls though for Ino getting so mad over this trivial little thing. According to Ino; it was a normal thing for boyfriends and girlfriends to tell each other that they loved each other. I think they were all taking the meaning of the word a little lightly. I mean I did like Ino, but I didn't love her. If I'm going to tell someone I love them, then they would probably be someone I would be willing to spend the rest of my life with, not someone I may go out with for a couple months.
I also started to hate the fact that she always started to talk about our future. Once we had been going out for three months she started talking about all kinds of crazy things and hinting at things like getting married and having kids. No, she never did come out and say 'so do you think we're going to get married and have kids,' it was more little hints like, 'so have you ever thought about getting married' and 'how many kids do you think you want'. Whenever one of these subjects came up I would just try and immediately change the topic to avoid getting yelled at. Because if we did end up talking about that, I always ended up saying stupid and getting her mad. I had no intention of marrying her. I wasn't even sure if I was going to get married at all. I also figured it was pretty pointless to talk about stuff so far in the future when in all likelihood I may be dead next week because of this whole Akatsuki thing.
The whole thing also started to really annoy Akamaru. Because Ino wanted to spend so much time together, Akamaru and I never got to be alone together anymore. Yes, Akamaru tagged along most of the times when me and Ino went out, but he still felt neglected. Ino didn't like me talking to Akamaru because she said a guy talking to his dog in public like that was weird and she wasn't going to go out with a crazy person. And then any time Akamaru and I wanted to go for a walk; Ino always had to tag along and we never got to have as much fun because she more wanted a peaceful stroll, while Akamaru and I wanted more of a mad dash through the woods.
And yet despite all this we're still together and now, more then ever, I think dating is one of the most annoying things on the planet. In fact, I would have ended this entire thing and just given up dating for now if it wasn't for one thing.
Sex.
Not to say Ino is a whore. But she is pretty easy. We had only been going out for like a week the first time she gave me head. And it was only a few more weeks after that the first time we had sex.
If it wasn't for my damn hormones I would have ended this crap long ago. But yet I just can't give it up. All those times when we're making out or fucking it almost makes it seem worth it to keep the relationship going.
But even sex has its downsides. Every time she gives me head she goes around acting like I owe her a favor. It almost makes it not worth it. After she goes down on me, she usually wants me to buy her something or do something all romantic for her, which makes me think of her even more of whore. I mean she's basically using sex to try and make me do stuff for her.
I really need to end this. Although I have a feeling that even if I try to end it she'll somehow find a way to convince me other wise and we'll continue to go out. I've decided that after I do manage to end this, I'm going to stop dating for a long time and if I ever really need sex I'll just go to a club or bar and find some really horny chick to fuck.
So that's basically where things are now. I'm completely miserable and I'm about ready to kill myself if things don't change soon.
Two Weeks Later
I'm a complete idiot. I think I may be the dumbest guy on the face of the earth.
I tried to break up with Ino several times, but like I had predicted she somehow managed to convince me not to.
So, I went to my teammates for help, hoping that they would have some advice on how to get rid of her. Of course Shino was absolutely no help and he didn't seem to have any interest in girls and he knew absolutely nothing about them. Kurenai was even worse, because well, you know. So I asked Hinata for help.
Hinata was a very shy person and as such had never gone out with anyone either. Just because she was so shy she hadn't even made an attempt to even really make friend with anyone. I actually think it's pretty cute how she gets all nervous and red when she's around people; especially that Naruto kid for some reason.
So I asked her for help, but she wasn't much use as she didn't really have any advice for me.
Then one night, Ino was being particularly annoying, constantly nagging me and being really emotional about all her really trivial problems, that even she had to have known didn't mean anything and she was just using them as excuses so she could get attention. So she was being pretty much unbearable to be around, so I had to get rid of her somehow. She wanted to go to a movie, and when she's in this kind of whiny, emotional mood, that's never fun as we usually get yelled at and kicked out of the movie because she talks too much.
So in an effort to get out of the movie, I told her I had a mission I had to go on and dashed away before she could try and convince me not to go. I went straight to Hinata to try and see if I could just hide at her house for the night so Ino wouldn't see me. Sadly, I couldn't, as Hinata's dad didn't particularly like me and wouldn't allow 'a mangy mutt' in the house. I didn't know if he was talking about me or Akamaru but I hated him for that comment either way.
So Hinata, being the nice person she was, offered to go around with me for the night so that if Ino ever saw me I could just say that we were on our way or coming back from a mission.
And me, being the genius I am, got an idea right now. I decided that maybe I could use this opportunity to break up with Ino. If I acted like I was on a date now with Hinata, Ino would break up with me for cheating. Admittedly, even at the time I could see the hundreds of ways this could go wrong, but I was so hell bent on just getting away from Ino that I was willing to try anything.
So I told Hinata we should go to a movie, using the excuse that Ino would most likely not see us there. That was a lie though, as I knew that Ino most likely would be there. I got to know her pretty well in the past few months and I knew that if she made a plan to see a movie she would see it whether I went or not.
So Hinata and I went to the movie. I made sure to go to the same movie Ino and I had been planning to go to before so that there was a high likely-hood that we would meet.
Well the movie didn't start for a while so Hinata and I went to get something to eat. We started talking and I remembered how amazing a person she actually was. We had been teammates so long that I usually only thought of her as that and I never really got a chance to just see how great a person she was. Yes, she was very shy, even when talking to me, someone she had known for years. But she was very smart and caring, and was just plain enjoyable to be around.
So we when the time came, we went to the movie. I sat next to her there, in the dark, just thinking. I was having a better time with Hinata today then I ever had had with Ino in the entire time we had been going out. Was this what dating was supposed to be like? Had I just approached this all wrong? The way I was thinking before I was acting like dating and being with someone was a chore, some mandatory thing you did just because you were expected to. But now I realized it wasn't such a bad thing as long as you were with someone you truly liked. Being with Hinata I didn't even mind that there was no way that we would have sex or do anything of that nature this night, I was just glad that I had gotten to spend time with her. This was different than any time with Ino. With her I would have deemed the night a failure if we didn't at least make out.
Through all this I had completely forgotten about my plan. So when a particularly sad part came along I put my arm around Hinata and gave her a kiss on the cheek as she was being noticeably touched by it. Just my luck, Ino was actually in the theater. She had just gone to the bathroom and when she was going back to her seat, a couple of rows in front of us, she noticed me kissing Hinata.
While it definitely was not the most uplifting experience to be dumped in a crowded movie theater by the loudest person in town the worst part was what happened after. I figured that maybe since now I was technically single again I could go out with Hinata. Who, throughout this night I realized that I truly did like. But Hinata had realized what I had done. She realized that I had just used her to get rid of Ino. Hinata was a very fragile person. Now she didn't trust me at all and I have a feeling she even hated me a little.
How could I have been this dumb? Because I wasn't strong enough to just break up with Ino normally instead of trying to make her break up with me with some stupid plot like this, I had effectively lost some one that truly meant something to me.
I don't really believe in fate, but I'd like to think that if me and Hinata were really meant to be together, that somehow I would be able to make her forgive me for this and give me a second chance. I also learned something new about relationships today that I hadn't realized before. I wasn't angry at myself now because I wouldn't have the joy of being with someone I actually liked, I was angry because I had hurt Hinata. If you really like someone, then in your mind, you will always think of them before thinking of yourself. With Ino, it had never been that way. I had only used her, I had never once worried about how she felt because I genuinely didn't want her to be sad, I just didn't want to be yelled at.
So in the end, like always, I get fucked over. I guess this is just my bad luck, since I've always seemed to have awful luck. I'd like to think I learned from all this, but chances are I'm just going to forget all this in about a week and just fuck up all over again.
Oh well. Since it doesn't look like I'm going to be getting any action for a while because of the scene Ino made in the theater making it so that all the girls think I'm a jerk. I think I'll get reacquainted with an old friend I haven't spent enough time with in the past couple months; my right hand.
Well, Hope you like it. This is alot different then what I normally write and it may have degraded towards the end since I got bored of writing. Please check out my other fics and review if you want.
