A/N Twilight and characters are property of Stephenie Meyer, I just rerouted them to my laptop for a bit of play.
"Let's play some cards!" Emmett yelled.
"Okay, but we need to find a game all of us can play, I hate that two of us are always sitting out when we play Spades," Alice whined.
"We could play Spoons," Edward said quietly.
"Spoons?" Rose asked.
"Oh yeah, that's awesome, and if we play with liquor the shit is even funner," exclaimed Jasper.
"Seriously, you just said 'funner,' way to crap all over our language," Rosalie said, raising an eyebrow at Jasper.
"Whatever," Emmett said brushing it off, "Spoons is simple but the shit is hysterical. You take a deck of cards and pull out a matching set for each number of players there are. So if there are six of us, we could pull out aces through sixes, shuffle them up. You lay out a spoon for everyone, minus one, so we would have five spoons, put them in the middle of the table, then you deal out the cards and start passing them trying to collect four of a kind, when someone collects four they reach out and grab a spoon, then everyone scrambles to get a spoon, the person who doesn't get a spoon gets a letter, when you spell SPOONS, then you get a truth or a dare. Also, after each round, the loser has to take a shot of something, that's what makes it funner."
"Totally in, this sounds like the funnest game ever," Alice bounced up.
Bella rolled her eyes in Alice's direction, "I'm in."
"Let's do this," Rose said walking towards the table.
Bella went and grabbed five spoons and plunked them down on her dining room table.
Emmett, Jasper and Edward all looked at one another with mischief in their eyes, none of the girls caught it.
When Bella came back with the deck of cards Emmett snatched them out and started to make piles for each set, "Okay, we are doing aces through sixes," he declared after he shuffled them and started to deal them out to the table. "Okay, and GO!" he shouted.
The cards started to fly furiously around the table, a brief glance and passed if not needed, or a stuffing into a hand if it matched what was being collected, there were elbows being thrown, cards being slid too far on the smooth tabletop, people trying to grab a wrong discarded card before their neighbor picked it up, the table was fraught with organized chaos, suddenly a hand jutted out grabbing a spoon, "Spoons!" Rose shouted and the rest of the table scrambled to grab a remaining spoon, Bella was left without one.
"And Swan collects the first 'S,'" Edward stated grabbing a pad of paper and pencil off of the credenza to keep score.
"Bite it Cullen," Bella said sulking, she hated to lose at cards. Edward snapped his teeth a couple of times for her benefit, Bella was not amused.
"Let's do it again, that was a rush," Alice declared, rubbing Jasper's knee.
Emmett dealt the cards and they played again and Bella lost again.
"What the stink is going on?" Bella exclaimed.
"Come on, Bellie, just relax, this is fun," Alice bubbled.
The next round Emmett lost, but only because Bella stuck her fingernails into his paw to stop him from grabbing the last spoon.
"Oww," Emmett whined.
"Don't be such a girl Emmett," Bella said shamelessly.
The next round Jasper lost, Bella had let out a high pitched scream which startled him long enough so she could grab the last spoon.
But in the end, Bella was the first person to spell out SPOONS, plus the shots she had weren't helping matters much, although, the boys did take it easy on Bella and only made her do half the amount of liquor, they didn't want the night getting too ugly too soon.
"Okay, Swan, do you want a truth or do you want a dare?" Edward asked, looking at her intently.
"That's a toughie, but since I don't feel like having to dress up in a chicken costume and desecrate our national anthem let's just do a truth and move into the living room, cause I want the couch."
"Fair enough, you go to the couch while we deliberate on a truth for you," Edward replied.
Bella walked to the living room and plopped down on the couch waiting for whatever silly question they were going to come up with.
"I think you girls should come up with the question, you've known her longer, there's got to be something she won't tell you?" Jasper said.
"I got it," Alice's eyes lit up, she leaned over and whispered it to Rose.
"I don't know if that's such a good idea, Alice, that could go terribly wrong, I mean we don't want to have the girl hate us after this," Rosalie replied.
"I think it's been long enough, she's got to tell us, that's the rule, never go back on a dare or a truth."
"Alright, but you ask," Rosalie said reluctantly.
The guys all shrugged their shoulders before following the girls into the living room.
"Okay Bellie, here's your question, what was your relationship to Dick Newton, and who did you lose your virginity to?" Alice asked.
"Fuck," Bella said under her breath. She turned at looked at Rosalie and Alice, Rosalie shook her head to absolve her of any association to the question.
The question had long been a puzzle to Alice and Rose. One day Bella had changed. Gone were her clumsy ways, she had even asked Rose to teach her how to dance, which Bella always attributed to curing her of her clumsiness, but it was more than that. She also stopped blushing so much. She didn't glow, but she just came to school one day with a certain coolness, both in behavior and trait. When Rose and Alice asked Bella what was up with her, Bella had been noncommittal, answering that nothing was really up with her. Neither Rose nor Alice believed her but knew it was useless to try and get anything more from Bella.
"Who's Dick Newton?" Edward asked.
Bella let out a little titter, "Hee, Dick Newton."
Alice rolled her eyes. "Seriously Bella, get over it already."
"Get over what?" Jasper asked, the boys' curiosity continuing to pique.
"When Bella worked at the sporting goods store, Newton's, in Forks the owner's name was Dick Newton. Bella admitted one night to us, and we may have been a little drunk, that every time she thought of his name she had a mental picture of a penis lizard running around," Rosalie explained.
"Get it, like a newt, and a penis, kills me every time," Bella's slight inebriation was starting to become evident.
"Yeah, we cracked the code," Emmett said, laughing at Bella.
"So, answer the question please," Alice said nearly tapping her foot in impatience.
"Wait a minute here, Alice, I lost one game and you asked me two questions. This isn't like a genie bottle and you can wish for another question," Bella argued.
"Come on, just answer it then we'll never bring it up again," Alice gave one more whine in hopes of getting her questions answered.
Bella let out a huff, this question came up every so often and it irritated her, but she figured Alice would just keep whining and Bella would look like a poor sport so she decided to just tell the story once and for all and put it behind her. She didn't have regrets but she didn't like sharing this much about herself.
Bella, in her normal story telling habit, looked around the room to make certain she had everyone's attention. Alice was staring at Bella, Rosalie too was looking at Bella, but had a look of contrition on her face. Emmett and Jasper had smirks on their lips while Edward's face was blank. Bella looked at Edward for a smidge longer wondering why he was expressionless. She decided to start her tale.
"Well, as Alice and Rosalie brought up, Dick Newton owned the sporting goods store I worked at in Forks. Wait, let me back up a bit so you all get the full story. Now, to answer the question directly, I didn't lose my virginity to Dick Newton, I lost it to Sam Uley."
"Wait, wha—" Alice exclaimed.
"Ironman Sam?" Rosalie questioned.
"Who is Ironman Sam?" Emmett asked.
"Sam Uley, he lived on the res and he was training for the Ironman competition in Hawaii, you know, that freaky hellish triathlon? Anyway, he used to come into the store for whatever supplies he would need and we sort of became friends. Actually we already knew each other, sort of, Charlie would take him fishing. But he didn't treat me weirdly after Charlie died, he was easy to just be with," Bella looked at Rose and Alice. Rose and Alice understood how much Bella hated how the town treated her differently after Charlie's shooting.
"Holy shit, you're like Indiana Jones with the secret hiding places for secrets, how did we miss this?" asked Rose, her eyes wide.
"Damn, wow, Sam, he was like, wow, those arms and those legs and muscles, wow," Alice choked out. Jasper looked at her appraising her expression.
"Alright, you nosey nancies wanted to know all about my Forks sexual escapades, so tonight, and tonight only you'll get the whole story," Bella said. She added, "If you guys aren't interested there's some more food left in the oven," Bella offered.
"And miss a look into the sexual escapades of one Bella Swan, no way, I'm all about it," Edward said leaning back into his chair, getting comfortable.
"Well, whatever," Bella said, averting her eyes from Edward's. She continued on with her story, "You know how I had been dating Mike?"
"Wait, who's Mike?" asked Emmett.
"Mike Newton," Alice replied quickly, wanting to get back to the story.
"Holy fuck, this is like, As the World Turns Into Day of Our General Ryan's Hope," Jasper said lasciviously.
"Listen you fuckers, you asked this as the truth question, I'm trying to tell you, do you want me to get through this or not, 'cause I already know the story," Bella said with slight exasperation.
"No, no, no, come on, tell the story," Emmett gestured with his paw to continue on.
"Well, I had been dating Mike, and we still hadn't really done too much, but I had gone down on him a few times. Let me just say, I wasn't exactly going to be overwhelmed the first time out of the starting blocks. Anyway, Sam kept coming in to the store, for little stuff, protein bars, butt balm, all things that if he made a list he could get and not have to come in so often. At some point during this time, not specific to Sam or anything, I decided I didn't want to have my first time be with Mike. I knew it was bitchy of me, but wanted something to be more than like, 27 seconds of Mike getting off and me left to either wait for another round or so or finish up myself. I didn't set my sites on Sam or anything, but I told Mike I wasn't ready to sleep with him, which wasn't exactly a lie, and I also set him up, covertly mind you, with Jessica, I couldn't stand to think I had been a cock tease all of those months with him and not help him at least get laid once."
"I wondered about Jessica, geez, she acted like the cat that swallowed the canary on the Mike coup. Kinda funny actually," Rosalie laughed to herself.
"Moving on from swallowing," Bella continued, "one day I was working when Sam came in," Bella was then interrupted.
"Wait, how old were you two?" Jasper asked, "Just as a point of reference."
"Uh, I was 18, Sam was maybe 22, give or take," Bella replied.
"Okay, got it," Jasper settled back into the couch next to Alice.
"So, Sam was in the store, buying more random stuff when I went over to the display to ask him if he needed any help. We started chatting and he asked me if I wanted to go to Quileute Days with him, I went and we walked around, he showed me all sorts of stuff from the tribe and explained some of their tribe's belief's and legends and history, it was really cool. From there we just started have these clandestine meetings, movies in Port Angeles, afternoon lunches on the cliffs at First Beach, walks in the woods. He was really nice, I didn't feel like I had all this pressure on me since he was a few years older. We talked a lot about our parents actually, his mom never telling him who his father was, I talked about Charlie. There was something behind all the muscles and tough expression that was a little sad but very sweet. Anyway, one Saturday we were over at my place having lunch, he had jogged over and he was going to help me fix the vent in the attic because there was a squirrel that kept trying to make a nest up there. The attic it was all hot and dusty and musty, when we finished we came back down the ladder and he took his shirt off, asking if he could wash up in the bathroom."
"Ahh, the ol' hot and musty and dusty attic, clean up in the bathroom trick," Jasper said while rubbing his chin.
"No, come on, it wasn't like that," Bella contradicted. "I went and got a towel from the linen closet, I knocked on the door and he opened it up and he was all shirtless and stuff," Bella looked away recalling the pleasant memory.
"Oh geez, is this going to get all Harlequin Romance embarrassing?" Emmett said.
"Alright, I won't give you the play by play, I'll just say that on that rainy Saturday afternoon was the last day I was a virgin."
"I can't believe we had no idea it was Sam," Rose said.
"So what, you started dating this like 22 year old guy after that?" Edward asked.
"Uh, I wouldn't say dating, but I was sort of, um, fanatical, no, that's not how to describe it, really eager? Maybe that was the best way to put it?"
The three boys all looked at one another, surprised for one that Bella was being so open and curious to have her continue her tale. Rosalie caught the glances and jabbed Emmett in his side.
"Ow, Rose, what was that for?" Emmett said, rubbing his side.
"For leering like a dirty old man," she replied icily.
"Yeah, so speaking of dirty old men, how does penis lizard guy come into all of this?" Edward asked.
"I'm getting there. Sam and I continued to hang out, he was good that way, he never acted like he was just in it for the high school girl sex. Around this time Mike and I started hanging out, just as friends, he was still trying to seal the deal with Jessica. But I asked him where his mom had been, I hadn't seen her around the store for maybe a month or so, and I had been picking up extra shifts and stuff like that. That's when Mike confessed that his mom had left his dad. She had moved back to California. That's all Mike really knew, or all his dad had told him. He missed his mom but knew his dad needed help with the store, but he was really torn up about it, he felt sort of caught in the middle of things.
"Aww, that's so sad, Mike's a good guy, a little dopey, but sweet nonetheless," Alice commented.
"Yeah, well, that's where things got a little weird. One night I was closing up with Dick, it was just the two of us in the store. He didn't know that I knew that Karen had left. I went in back after he locked the doors, to go and count out my drawer and I walked in on him pulling a bottle of liquor out from his desk. I tried to excuse myself but he just started talking, pouring his heart out to me. I didn't know what to do but sit down and listen to him. Apparently they had been having troubles for years, that's why Dick had moved his family to Forks and bought the store, he thought it would bring them closer, all of them working together, reestablishing themselves as a family in a small town community. Karen, that was Dick's wife, kept saying she had to go back and help her sister, who still lived in California, but in actuality she was having an affair. When Dick found this out he tried to get her to leave the other guy and go to counseling with him and stuff. She said she didn't want to live this life anymore, that kind of thing. He understood, he tried, she tried, it just wasn't in the cards for them. He just felt like he failed at something. I told him he was a good father, a good businessman who was an upstanding man to his community, a charitable man, always helping out with the rec center on the res, but he was just so sad. We would spend hours talking after work, nothing sexual about any of it. This went on for months," Bella paused taking a sip of water.
Rose spoke up, "So how did things change?"
"Alright, well, here's where it gets kinda Dear Penthouse Forum," Bella smiled to herself. "I had left the store one night, Dick was still in there, it was raining like mad, per usual, and it turned out I couldn't start my truck. I went and opened the hood because I knew sometimes if I jiggled things around it would start up, I was leaning over the hood when he came out and saw me there. He started to help, sort of leaning over with me when I felt him," she paused again, "you know, getting um, excited. At first I didn't let him know I felt it, I wasn't certain if he wanted me to or not, but then he kept kinda pressing into me. I know, it sounds so creepy, but, it, uh, it wasn't. I was in fact getting sorta hot," Bella touched her neck.
"Whoa," both Alice and Rosalie breathed out.
"Well, you girls remember that he was pretty good looking, yeah?" Bella asked.
"Yeah, I guess he was actually, in a dad kind of way," Rose agreed.
"Yeah, well, I thought he was, with his light brown hair and still in good shape and blue eyes. When he was pressing up against me I turned myself around so we were face to face. I asked him if he could give me a ride home since I didn't think my truck would make it. We got into his truck, we didn't say anything on the drive to my house and when we got there I asked him in. When we got inside he said he got the divorce papers that day. I took his hand and brought him into the kitchen.
"Wait, where were your parent's?" Edward asked.
"Bella's dad had died and Bella had gotten herself emancipated. Her mom said she trusted Bella and she came into town every month or so," Alice explained for Bella's benefit.
"Yeah, I was living in my father's house, which was actually mine at that point, I got good grades in school, wasn't known for being wild, my mom trusted me."
"So then what?" Alice asked, gripped by the story.
"I heated him up some pasta leftovers, I was terribly domestic. It was sort of depressing really, he said he hadn't eaten a home cooked meal in like years. God, what do you say to that? So I fed him, and then took his hand and led him upstairs. That first time was just about him releasing his grief, in a way. I told him he was a good man, and not a failure. And to my surprise, it wasn't Dick's side that Mike inherited his, um, features from, Dick was really, mmm, pleasant," Bella hummed a bit.
"So wait, how long did this go on?" Rose asked, her curiosity winning out over her contrition.
"Almost until we moved here. He said how he and Karen hadn't really had sex for years, I think he was making up for lost time. And after a few months Sam had already moved to Hawaii, so I didn't have too much else going on. Dick eventually joined some group therapy thing and met a woman, but he still writes me like once a month," Bella finished her story.
"So, did you ever hook back up with the son?" asked Edward.
"What, no! I wasn't trying to plow through all the men of Forks, that's just gross Edward!"
"Okay – sorry," he held up his hands in supplication.
"Dick Newton, I gotta hand it to you Bell, had you not told us, we would have never known," Rose remarked.
"But wait, you had to have known something, why've you been asking me this for years?" asked Bella to Alice and Rose.
"We actually just wanted to know who you lost your virginity to, and then things sort of snowballed from there, and one night Rose and I went to your house to see what you were up to and all the lights but your bedroom light were off, then we saw Mr. Newton's car parked around the corner and we were joking around that you two were carrying on a torrid love affair. How the shit were we to know that that was exactly what you two were doing?" Alice explained in a rush.
"Well, now you all know my secretest of secrets, and ladies; in the vault, at the bottom of the sea, to the grave, throwing away the key, and pinky swear to never, ever, repeat this to anyone, as long as you both shall live."
"Cross our hearts," Rosalie and Alice said in unison, crossing their hearts solemnly.
"Holy crap, and I thought getting laid the first time in the back of the Volvo was cool," Emmett exclaimed.
"Huh, I did it for the first time in the back of the Volvo," Edward said.
"Fuck, me too, and with dippy Katie Marshall," Jasper said.
"Shit, I was with Katie Marshall too," Edward said.
"Damn, that girl scored an unassisted triple play! She took all three Cullen's out!" Emmett slapped his thigh at the memory.
"Yeah, you guys are right, Spoons is funnest funner around," Bella laughed.
So, I have a story started, for the most part involving what you read, although will be a little more angstish, or hurt comfort, I hate being put in a box, but regardless, if this holds any interest to folks I'll post it up. It would be posted under a different title though, we'll see how it goes. Thanks for making it to the end!