A/N: So I've been writing scripts and stuff, and I thought I could turn this one into a nice Eric/Calleigh story. The details will be vague, I shall add a story that precedes this one (I think that's right…precedes haha) to explain how this one came to be, but for now, here this is. I will also add on more later, but yeah, for now this shall be good I suppose. I have enough stories to update right now hah I'm almost done my next Christmas with Calleigh chapter hah yay.. here we go:
--& Calleigh's POV &--
I still remember the day they found you. I wouldn't believe them. I refused to face the truth. I thought they were lying, I honestly did. I honestly believed that they were just trying to hurt me, to break me, in any way possible. I need you more than I ever did. I can still feel you, when I'm alone, holding me tight. Protecting me like you always did, like you promised me you always would. You promised me you'd never leave. Sometimes I swear I feel you shaking me gently, calling me back ton the consciousness of another day, but when I open my eyes, it's not you. Then I remember you're gone and my heart dies again. It shatters, explodes. Every time I'm reminded you're gone, gone forever, you're not coming back, my heart breaks into a million pieces and I wish I was gone too. But I couldn't do what you did to me to someone else. True, I'm destroyed, but I'm not a destroyer. Then some days, my sorrow is suddenly gone and vengeance and spite take its place. You've broken you're promises, you've broken my heart, and I hate you for it. I loved you, couldn't you see that? I really did. What happened wasn't my fault, you know, and I know that everyone told you to do the right thing, but you couldn't, could you? So you jumped ship, in the worst possible way. I would have rather you walked out on my life, on our life, rather than your own. You left, and I have to go on. It would have been easier, don't you see, for me to tell my daughter, she's going to be a girl you know, that her Dad had to go away, that he didn't have a choice, to make up a heroic story, because I would have done that for you, I loved you that much, rather than to tell her that you killed yourself. Rather to tell it was our fault you died, in some twisted way. You were perfect in my mine, as you could have been in hers. You didn't have a single flaw. To me, you were the reflection of perfect, and I would have done anything for you. How was I blinded by your love and promises? How was I so naïve to think you would love me too, no matter what, if you ever loved me at all, that is. You promised you were different, and now you left me like everyone else. I still have to get up every day, and push one more memory to the back of my mind. I have to get up and pretend that one more thing isn't ripping me apart inside. You don't have to wake up every morning anymore. You don't have to have your heart shattered to pieces every single time you open you're eyes. You took the easy way out, you left me with broken promises and nearly hopeless tomorrows, and that's all I'd have left if it weren't for this girl. The girl that killed you. And I'll love her more than I loved you, because she's you and more than that, she's me as well. I'll do anything to give her the life I never had. I'll do anything for her.
--& Eric's POV &--
Do you know what it feels like? It doesn't compare to anything else in the world, except maybe the continuous reminders that you're gone and you're responsible. I really can't believe you did things this way, how could you leave her? How could you leave me? How could someone as amazing as you do this to yourself, to all of us? Did it make it more fun to know what you were leaving behind? How many people depended on you? How many people loved you? The promises you made, the lies you made to earn my trust, did they replace your self-respect, did they replace your soul? You used to have the biggest heart, when we were little kids, when did everything change? Do you know how much that hurts? Do you know what you've done to me, and not only me, we were only best friends, but to your girlfriend, to your child? You died in such a dishonest, painless way… it makes me sick to think about it. The only thing that makes me sicker is to think how blinded I was, how blinded we all were, by your promises, by your image of false perfection that we couldn't see through. You left this world knowing I loved you, trusted you, and confided in you like I did with no one else. Hell, I told you that minutes before you took your own life. I can't imagine how she feels, I feel bad enough but you were her everything, and you chose to leave. Who's the one helping her through this all now? Me. She wasn't going to force you into anything, she was simply telling you because you had a right to know. You chose to shatter her, to leave me, and now, I am paying more than the price for my will to trust others when no one else did. Do you remember all those years ago when no one else would trust you, and I was your friend? Your best friend. Then things changed and now I am paying for my faith, for my hope, for everything that I put into giving you a second chance just like everyone warned me I would. Now I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust anyone again. When you were around, I was never more than second best, and now I've finally proven that I'm better than you. Who should be up with her when it's six in the morning and she is throwing up? It should be you. But it's me. I didn't get into this situation, you did, and you got out, but I'm still here. Knowing that I've proven myself finally, that we all understand now, what a horrible person you were, doesn't make it any easier though, because when you were around, I didn't mind being second best, and knowing that all those years were a lie… that hurts more than anything else. Knowing that I'm taking your place in your daughter's life, it's a girl by the way, rips me up inside. But maybe you didn't deserve to be her father, not if you didn't want it because this girl will be amazing, and you'll never know how much you missed out.
--&
CONFUSING? Yes I would think it would be confusing, but I'll clear things up soon. For now, reviews would be b greatly /b appreciated! Thank you for reading!