"Here we are. The final show. The conclusion of the USO Tour in the South of France coming to you from the Citadel. What a gorgeous setting here tonight under the stars…"
And indeed, it was a gorgeous night—a night Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale will never forget.
Two hours earlier…
Beca was two hours away from her performance as DJ Khaled's opening act. Just two days ago, she declined this same offer, but now, she was two hours away from doing it. Now, she was officially signed as a solo artist on an actual record label. It hasn't completely sunk in in Beca's head. Everything was happening very fast, and Beca was having a hard time keeping up. She seemed put together, but deep inside, Beca Mitchell was a confused mess still in a daze over everything that's happening around her.
It wasn't that she wasn't happy or grateful for the opportunity that she was given—hell! Beca was the probably happiest woman on the planet right now. She has been waiting for this opportunity since she started getting into music. She was excited for what's to come, but the problem was, by doing this, it meant choosing her career over her family—the Bellas, and that was something that Beca never wanted to do, nor did she ever think she ever had to do. Yes, they already talked about it days ago, but Beca still couldn't help the sadness that she felt—the guilt over the choice that she made.
She knew that the Bellas meant what they said when they told her that she had their full support on her new journey. She knew how genuine those words were because that's how much they love her—that's how much they loved each other; they'd support and love one another unconditionally no matter what. Their words should be enough to comfort her, right? But why did Beca still felt the way she did? Why did she still feel like a nervous mess? Why did she feel like she was betraying them?
Beca was by herself backstage at the Citadel anxious because that was the first time she was performing without the Bellas—her girls—her family. She has tried everything she could think of to calm herself even those meditation stuff that Chloe always insisted on teaching her because "you're too tense Beca… you need to relax," but none has worked; Beca Mitchell was still nervous hiding behind the façade of her shiny new look.
She was pacing in her dressing room trying to shake off her nerves when she heard a soft knock on the door. Beca stopped pacing and closed her eyes as she released a breath she didn't realize she's been holding.
"Come in."
She opened her eyes and turned her head to her visitor only to see a stunning Chloe enter. Beca was taken aback—not expecting her best friend's presence in her dressing room, but also because Chloe looked beautiful in her black dress and leather jacket, but then again, Chloe always looked beautiful—Beca thought to herself.
Beca was busy admiring Chloe, but Chloe began to speak.
"Hey, Bec…"
Chloe proceeded to talk to no one because for a reason unknown to Beca, Chloe kept her head down even as she entered Beca's room. She didn't bother to look at Beca or to look for Beca at all. She just began talking to no one in particular hoping that Theo was right, Beca was actually in that massive dressing room to hear her.
"… I asked Theo where I could find you, and he told me you'd be here, so here I am. Standing in front of you. I mean at least I think I am. If this even is the right room…"
Beca was in the far end of her dressing room and as soon as she saw Chloe enter the door, she was ready to sprint across the room to hug her best friend for comfort, but then Chloe started babbling, so Beca just allowed her to embarrass herself for a little while. Chloe hasn't even been in the room for one minute and she has already managed to make Beca smile; she has already managed to calm her down and make her feel safe, and that's something that no one can ever do. Chloe's voice echoed.
"… Beca? Are you here?"
Chloe, who was still standing in the same spot, scanned the dressing room for a tiny brunette when finally a beaming Beca finally caught her eye.
"Hi, Chlo."
Chloe couldn't help the smile that formed on her face. Beca looked stunning. She was extra shiny tonight, which was different from Beca's usual look, but she looked gorgeous nonetheless.
"Hi, beautiful."
They both have smiles on their faces as they walked towards each other because continuing a conversation based on the distance they were at would be unbearable especially for Beca and Chloe. They needed to be close to each other. They needed each other's comfort especially Beca; she needed Chloe close to her at that moment.
"I just wanted to see you before you went on stage. Actually, all of us did. The Bellas are right behind me. They're just talking to the other groups, but I went ahead of them because I wanted to talk to you first. I just wanted to be alone with you for a bit—you know, before I have to share you with the whole world and stuff."
Beca chuckled and rolled her eyes.
"Oh my God. You're so dramatic, Chlo."
She thought it was sweet that Chloe wanted to be alone with her; she appreciated that, and if she was being honest, she wanted that—Beca needed that. Slowly, Beca started to be at ease. It was crazy how Chloe's mere presence and simple words can slowly turn "nervous mess Beca" into "comfortable at ease Beca." It was like Chloe has some sort of magical powers that can magically cure an emotionally confused person, OR she just naturally knows where Beca's emotional switch was. Either way, Beca was grateful that her best friend was finally with her because she doesn't know what she would have done if Chloe didn't show up at all.
"It's true, Bec. After tonight. After your performance, you won't get to be just 'my Beca' anymore because everyone will know you, and each and every one of them will love you. Obviously, not as much as I do, but they will because you're amazing, Bec…"
Beca couldn't help but smile because of the way her best friend was talking about her, and she also couldn't her the way her heart skipped a beat when Chloe said that she loved her and called her hers. Beca knew it wasn't the way she wanted it to mean, but she still couldn't help but fantasize from time to time that maybe Chloe actually meant them the way Beca hoped she did.
"... Once they hear that amazing voice of yours—once they find out how talented you are, they won't be able to forget who Beca Effin' Mitchell is. No one will be able to resist the Beca Effin' Mitchell Charm."
"You give me too much credit, Chlo—way more than I deserve."
"Shut up. It's true. I mean fuck! You're Beca Effin' Mitchell for fuck's sake!"
Beca's smile grew wider.
"Okay, are you done with your 'Beca Effin' Mitchells now?"
"No."
Chloe sounded like a petulant child at her response, and the pout that formed on her face didn't help either. Beca wanted to laugh, but she also wanted her friend to hear what she had to say without her getting annoyed at Beca, so she decided to keep her laugh to herself.
"Well, can I at least talk?"
Chloe shrugged.
"I guess."
"First of all, thanks Chlo. Thanks for coming here. I've been so alone in here all afternoon since you guys left after watching the rehearsal, so you have no idea how much your presence means to me. I mean, until now I'm still not sure I did the right thing signing that contract with DJ Khaled…"
After she realized what she had said, suddenly, as if someone pushed a panic button, Beca's nerves was back. Beca's heart started racing, and suddenly, she felt like she couldn't breathe. She paused, then suddenly Beca was panicking, and she was talking as if someone was running after her.
Chloe noticed the sudden change in Beca's behavior. She saw the anxiety taking over Beca's eyes; she heard it in Beca's voice. She saw the wheels turning inside Beca's head. She saw that Beca was on the verge of a panic attack. She tried stopping it as soon as she realized it was happening, but it was too late. Beca was already spiraling into a nervous breakdown, and she was starting to pace.
"… Oh my God. I have no idea what I'm doing here, Chloe. I'm freaking out. I mean this is way out of my league. This is too much. What the hell was I thinking? I can't do this. This isn't me. I mean maybe this was what I wanted to do at some point in my life, but I'm a producer now. I do the backstage, before release stuff for singers—for up and coming artists…"
Chloe wanted to stop Beca from panicking; she wanted to stop her best friend from torturing herself; she wanted to do something, but she also knew that Beca needed to release all of her anxiety that's been building up in that tiny body of hers or else she will explode in a much worse way later, so it was better if it happened before her first performance, and before the many more to come, and while Chloe was present because no one was better equipped at handling Beca Mitchell at her worse than Chloe Beale herself, so as much as it pained Chloe to see Beca like the way she was, she allowed Beca to release all of her anxiety and frustrations.
"… Hell, I'm an up and coming producer. I'm a producer, Chloe. Not this! Okay yeah, I sing but only as part of a group. You know that thing that consist of other people other than me. You're in that group with me remember? The key word is group. Group, meaning not by myself. I've never sang in front of a bunch of people on my own, Chlo. My Bellas audition was the first and last time I ever performed by myself in front of a crowd. I've only ever sang with the Bellas—that's the only type of performance I've done—not this! I don't even remember dreaming or ever wanting to become an artist this way. Chloe, I can't fucking do this! Do you think it's too late to back out? Oh my god, yeah this is a huge mistake. I have to find that Turtle. I mean, Theo. Where's Theo? You said you talked to him, right? I'm going to go find him. I have to tell him they made a mistake. They have to choose someone else. Better yet, I'm going to tell them to choose the Bellas. I can't do this… I can't do this on my own. I just… I just can't…"
Beca was about to walk out the door, but Chloe was able to grab Beca's arm before she can move past her. Then Chloe grabbed Beca by her shoulders to steady her in front of herself.
"What the fuck, Beca! What the hell just happened to you?"
Chloe raised her voice slightly out of shock, but she was also hoping that it would snap Beca out of her own head. However, after seeing her best friend up-close looking very small and vulnerable, Chloe hated herself for what she did. She knew that should have handled it better, so Chloe took a deep breath and held on to Beca.
Chloe was staring at Beca's steely blue eyes with so much concern. She saw how much the anxiety has taken over them, but Chloe became even more concerned when she noticed the tears that started to form on the beautiful greyish blues she loved so much.
"Just calm down okay? I know it's easier said than done, but please trust me. Breathe with me, Beca. Close your eyes. Don't think of anything else. Just breathe with me. Be here with me."
They do that for a while until Chloe finally felt confident that Beca was starting to be at ease.
"I'm not going to ask you if you're okay because I know you're not, but Bec… you were just thanking me for coming, and now, you're on your way out to quit? That's not like you, Beca. Also, didn't you hear anything I just said? You're Beca Fucking Mitchell! My badass grumpy little weirdo. You're a wonderful person—a very smart one might I add, and there is no one in this world that I trust more than you. You're my amazingly talented best friend—a little annoying, but hell, you're a beautiful wonderful human being and anyone would be lucky to have you in their life…"
Beca was wide eyed in between Chloe's grasp. She was intently listening to every word that Chloe was saying—not wanting to miss a thing.
"… I can't think of anyone that can do this better than you. And I certainly can't think of anyone that deserves this more than you. You've worked so hard to get where you are, Bec. You've been through so much, and you've put yourself through so much in order to be here. You've been waiting for this opportunity since forever. Hell, you didn't even want to be a Bella in the first place remember? You thought we were lame. 7 years later, it still hurts, but let's not get into that right now, my point is, you didn't want to be with us because THIS is what you wanted… not THIS necessarily, but this will lead you there, Bec. This is your chance, so, and I mean this with all my love… shut the hell up and take it! You got this, Beca."
Chloe used her right hand to caress Beca's face. Beca closed her eyes sinking into her best friend's touch. She felt safe right now. She felt comfortable. She felt at home, and at that moment, that's exactly what Beca needed.
"You're going to be okay. We're not leaving you. I mean if you think we're not going to ride off of your future fame with you then you clearly don't know us very well!"
"Chloe!"
Beca pushed her, and they both laughed. Chloe smiled, grateful that she was able to cheer up her best friend.
"I'm kidding. Well, maybe not for Amy…"
Beca was smiling because yes, that was very true about their Australian friend.
"… But seriously, Beca. You don't have to worry about doing this on your own because when you step on that stage, or any stage in the future—because for sure there will be many—you will always be at home. You will always have the Bellas with you no matter what and wherever you go. We will always be right there with you. We're a family. We're pretty hard to shake off especially at times when you need us the most. It's Bellas for life, Bec."
As soon as Chloe finished speaking, tears started to fall from Beca's eyes. Chloe didn't say anything; she just pulled Beca closer to her and hugged her tight—tighter than she ever had before. It was as if she was afraid that if she hugged her any less, it would make them both fall apart.
Beca gave in to Chloe's hug. She hugged her tight, and she didn't want to let go because she knew that only Chloe can give her the sense of comfort that she needed at the moment. She placed her head on Chloe's shoulder, then suddenly she felt that everything will actually be alright—she didn't know how, but she knew that things will work out because she had Chloe with her.
Chloe felt Beca hug her tighter as they basked in each other's presence. Chloe felt Beca's breath evening out as they stand in the middle of the room. She felt Beca's heart beating on her chest, but it wasn't anxious anymore—it was calm. Chloe heard tiny sobs coming from Beca, but she didn't say anything; she just hugged her tighter and breathed in deeper as if she's breathing for both of them. They weren't saying anything; they were just standing there in the middle of the room living in their own little world—hoping and begging that the peaceful quiet moment they were having doesn't end.
It was what they both needed. A moment of peace. A moment of quiet. A moment of just them two enjoying each other's presence. A moment of just them being Beca and Chloe—the best friends who were always there for each other—the best friends whose actions speak louder than words—the best friends who were too blind to see the truth.
Beca was the first one to break the hug, and as much as Chloe didn't want to let go, she let her. Beca was trying to wipe tears off of her face with her hands, but Chloe offers her a tissue instead; she would have done it herself, but she thought she'd give Beca some chance to recollect. Beca gladly accepted Chloe's offer and spoke again.
"I don't want to fail, Chloe. I'm scared that if I do this, the same thing would happen just like last time."
"'Just like last time?' You mean with your last job? Bec, as far as I'm concerned, you didn't fail when you quit that stupid job. You did the opposite. You knew what you wanted—you knew what you deserved. You have integrity, and you wanted to stay true to that. That's not called failing, Beca."
Chloe smiled at Beca as she tucked a piece of Beca's hair behind her ear.
"And in regards to you failing now? You won't, baby. I know it! Don't ask me how. I just do. But also, I just really believe in you."
"Geez thanks for the pressure, Chlo."
"I didn't mean it to pressure you, Bec. I said it because I mean it. You know I'm your biggest fan regardless of what you do or what happens to you. Whether you become Beyoncé famous or not, I'd still be your number 1 fan. But you know what, if by some stupid stroke of fucking whatever and you don't happen to fully succeed, then Beca Mitchell, I promise you, I will always be here to catch you, so you have nothing to be afraid of, babe. I'll always be here, alright? So, please no more crying, Bec. We don't want to ruin this night for you."
Beca released a small laugh as Chloe helped her fix her smudged make up. She was really grateful that her best friend showed up when she did. She didn't know what would have happened if Chloe didn't show up at all, and she's glad she doesn't have to find out because she's sure that it would be a million times worse than the roller coaster she just went through.
She was an emotional mess, and she doesn't know how it all happened, yet Chloe was able to fix her just by being there and talking to her. Chloe was able to talk her out of a mental break down. Chloe was able to find her emotional dial and figure out a way to tone it down, so Beca could function again as a somewhat normal human being. Beca could breathe again thanks to Chloe, and everything just feels so right.
"By the way. I would have said something earlier, but I got distracted. You look beautiful, Beca. Stunning. It's an outdoor stadium, and the stars are out, but you'll be shining brighter than all of them because you're a star, Beca. The brightest of them all."
Beca almost choked from what Chloe just said. She appreciated the sentiment, but she's taken by surprise by Chloe's words.
"Jesus, Chloe! How long have you been holding on to that one?"
Chloe smirked at her, and both women started laughing after they realized the cheesiness of the statement, but also because they were grateful that the worse of the moment had passed.
"A while. But I'm not kidding though. You're beautiful, Beca. The most beautiful person I've ever met. Inside and out, and I'm very proud of you. Not because DJ Khaled picked you. You know I've been proud of you even before that…"
Beca smiled at Chloe, but also feeling a little shy because of Chloe's sweet words. One would think Beca Mitchell was used to it by now, but something about this moment was different. Maybe it was because of Beca's meltdown and how Chloe perfectly handled it, or maybe it was because everything about tonight was a big deal so all of her emotions and feelings were heightened, but something about the moment they were having now just made everything feel more vulnerable and surreal—it was unlike anything Beca has ever felt before.
She wanted to bask in the feeling and live in the moment, but she knew it was too good to be true. She thought she was making something out of nothing, so in true Beca fashion, she tried to avert the weird feeling through sarcasm. She didn't want to avoid it—she loved the feeling, but at the same time she wasn't sure what the feeling was: it's weird; it's great; it's amazing; it was everything that she wants to feel but at the same time can't identify because she's never felt it before.
"Now, you're just boosting my ego. That's not good, Chlo. My head is gonna get so big. If you don't stop, my head will literally explode."
Beca was hoping that would've at least eased some of the weirdness, but Chloe wasn't ready to back down. Chloe didn't even realize what Beca was trying to do because Chloe was a woman on a mission—she was determined to do something, and she was not going to let Beca's sarcasm stop her from doing it.
Chloe stepped closer in front of Beca, so she could get a better look of her best friend. She was staring directly into Beca's eyes. Baby blues staring into a pair of steely blue ones. Beca wanted to look away, but Chloe's magnetic eyes wouldn't let her. "Oh my God, she's so captivating," Beca thought to herself. She wanted to run away now more than ever, but she knew she wouldn't be successful. Beca felt like she was glued to the ground because of how intently Chloe was staring at her. In her head Beca thought, "what does she want from me. She can't just stare at me like that with those damn blue eyes." She was frustrated that Chloe has that much power over her, but she couldn't help it. She didn't know how to stop it, or maybe she didn't want to stop it. She didn't know what to do; all she knew was how much she loved Chloe's baby blue eyes and basically everything about her. Beca wished nothing more than to be able to say it—to tell Chloe how she truly felt, but she was Beca Mitchell—she wouldn't know how to do it even if it bit her in the ass—well, it already has—multiple times.
"Beca, I'm serious. I'm just… I'm in awe of you Beca Mitchell, and I wanted you to know that. You're an amazing person, and there aren't enough words in the world to describe you. You make everyone around you feel better without even realizing it. And you're so good at everything you do. You're a little weirdo, and you put on this tough exterior, but in reality, you're actually very sweet and thoughtful and kind. You speak your mind, and you're tiny, but I know damn well you can handle yourself. You have integrity, and you're loyal. You're everything people wish they can be. You're just unapologetically YOU, and I admire you for it. You're Beca Fucking Mitchell, and I love every single thing about you. I love you... I'm IN love with you Beca Mitchell. Hopelessly in love."
Beca couldn't believe what she just heard. Her eyes were wide and her mouth agape. She was breathless from disbelief. It didn't seem real. She didn't know if she heard Chloe correctly or if she was just imagining things. Chloe has complimented Beca countless of times before—she's told her she loved her more times than Beca can count, but this time was different; just like the emotions Beca has been feeling this whole time.
"Chloe…"
Beca said Chloe's name like it was a prayer. She said it as if it was the most precious thing to ever come out of her mouth. Chloe was smiling at the astonished look on Beca's face; she thought Beca was so beautiful the way she looked, but it was the way her heart skipped a beat after she heard the way Beca said her name that Chloe would never forget. She was going to cherish that simple moment forever; it was already been engraved in both her heart and memory.
Chloe was looking at Beca with so much love and adoration, and she could feel that Beca was doing the same thing. Beca raised her hand to move a strand of hair away from Chloe's face, then finally, she just went for it. Beca didn't think about it. She didn't have any words because she was not good with words like her best friend. Instead, she was going to live in the moment with Chloe—she'll take it in and breathe with Chloe. As she gazed into Chloe's blue eyes, she no longer saw the baby blues that she loved. At that moment, she was looking at Chloe, and Beca saw everything that she has been missing. She saw everything she has been too afraid to see. She saw everything she has always wanted but never had the courage to fight for. She looked into Chloe's eyes, and she saw the woman she loved.
After 7 years, Beca finally got the courage to lean in and kiss the woman she has been in love with. Slowly, Beca and Chloe inched closer to each other to finally close the gap between them and have the moment they've both been waiting for. For Beca and Chloe, it felt like the world has stopped, and everything just became about the two of them. For them, it seemed like the universe finally gave them a break and decided to give them the peace and quiet that they needed so that they can finally have a chance to be together—give them the happiness that they deserve after making them wait for a long time. But unfortunately, it wasn't like that. The world didn't stop. The universe wasn't that kind. Unfortunately, as much as everything inside the room seemed to stop, everything outside didn't. The world kept going. Beca's performance was still happening in less than 2 hours. Everyone was still preparing for the big night. And most of all, the Bellas were still on their way to Beca's dressing room to see her.
Everything happened so fast, but their kiss wasn't one of them. Beca and Chloe were so close when they were startled by a knock on the door followed by Fat Amy's voice roaring through the doorway. The Bellas unannounced but expected grand entrance made Beca and Chloe jump apart like they just got caught kissing—which they were except they weren't—the appropriate term would be that they got INTERRUPTED from what would have been their first actual kiss.
"What's up, short stack! Are you ready to do this? Or should my sexy ass replace your cute ass?"
Amy's voice echoed through Beca's dressing room, and it scared both Beca and Chloe. They saw the Bellas follow right behind her, and all the girls noticed the wide-eyed Beca and Chloe in the middle of the room looking at them. They all look at each other a second too long in an awkward pause until Cynthia Rose finally broke the silence.
"Sorry, did we interrupt something?"
Chloe was snapped out of shocked state by Cynthia Rose's voice, and nervously responded for her and Beca.
"Oh no… You didn't. I was just helping... Beca fix her make up. Yeah! I was helping her fix her make up. She kinda smudged it earlier wiping her eyes."
Beca was just as nervous, and when Beca was nervous, she gets extra weird and awkward.
"Yeah. You know me. Smudgy McGee. You guys are fine nothing to interrupt here. Just klutzy ol' me… We good, Chlo?"
After she realized that Beca was addressing her, Chloe nods and responded.
"Yeah. We good, babe… I mean, Bec."
Chloe moved away from Beca to let the other Bellas talk to her, then she threw away the tissue she has been holding in the trash and walked towards Aubrey. She stood next to Aubrey, and while they were looking at the rest of their friends, Aubrey addressed her friend quietly so no one else could hear.
"We interrupted something didn't we?"
"Yes. Yes, you did."
