Title: Garcia Really Does See Everything
Author: darkbardzero & sofialindsay
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: JJ/Emily, (a little Reid/Will)
Disclaimer- We own nothing!
Rating: R, to be on the safe side for implied themes!
Summary: Everyone's gay…
AN: This what happens when darkbardzero and sofiaLindsay decide to drink together. It's borderline crack!fic, and not to be taken seriously! Well, certain parts are serious, but you know what we mean!
Archiving: Women in Kevlar, P&P
"You can't put that up there! Oooh, put that up there!"
Garcia jumped back from the conference-room door as though she had been burnt. On the other side was none other than Spencer Reid and Will LaMontagne, doing only god knows what.
"JJ... do you realize Captain Crawfish is gay?!"
JJ and Emily both stood stock still as Garcia entered the room in a whirlwind, whispering loudly and almost conspiringly.
"What makes you think that, Garcia?" Emily asked, trying to hide her amusement. Obviously Garcia's gaydar needed a fine-tuning.
Garcia looked over her shoulder, before leaning forward and whispering, "Erm... cuz he has Reid bent over the conference room table..."
"WHAT??"
"I'm sorry Jay…But I'm pretty sure they are… yeah."
"OH! How dare he!! That's mine and Emily's spot!" JJ stood from the desk, determined to go set the two men straight…on location for their romps, that is. Only Emily's arm grabbing her around the waist stopped her.
"Erm, Jay...I think your priorities are a lil' out of whack!"
"Like hell they are! We'll never be able to use the table again! I sooo don't feel guilty for sleeping with Emily now!"
"Jennifer!" Came Emily's indignant squeak.
"Wait… you're gay? Or would you be bi?" Garcia started, stopping only when she saw the death glare from the press liaison. "Okay, I'll take that as gay then…and your boy toy is gay… and Reid is gay…and Emily… what the hell are you?"
Emily raised her eyebrow, "I don't do labels. They get too messy and complicated."
"So you would agree to a threesome with JJ and a guy?" Garcia replied, the tone in her voice would make you think she was simply asking if you wanted coffee or tea.
"Oh hell fucking no! No guy is coming near me! I have a gun, and I'm not afraid to use it!" Emily retorted, earning a simultaneous eye-roll from the two blondes.
"She's gay," The blonde pair said in unison.