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Prologue:Welcome to hell kid!
Tears streamed down Naruto's face as he fell from the ravine Jiraiya pushed him off of.'Why?Why?I thought I could trust him!JIJI TRUSTED HIM!But...if Jiji trusted him,and he did this...WHY JIJI!WHY?'The tears came harder when he thought about the village and the people in it,memories surfacing as the ground approached fast.
Sarutobi letting him wear his hat,and sit in the Hokage's Chair.
Iruka treating him to ramen.
Becoming A leaf Shinobi.
Kakashi,Sasuke,Sakura and him in their team picture.
Training on the Mission to wave.
Hinata congradulating him after his C-Rank mission.
And then...it ended...and the bad memories came to the surface...
The Academy class mocking him,the villagers beating him,cursing him,Sakura bashing him over the head,Sasuke and Kakashi belittling him,Sarutobi taking the villagers demands over his health,Kakashi not training him,the council trying to have him assassinated,the Kyuubi taking over.
Naruto's eyes snapped open as he looked over his shoulder,and realized that 60 seconds from that moment his body would be broken.
'NO!I DON'T WANT TO DIE!I DON'T WANT TO DIE TRAINING FOR THAT VILLAGE!THEY'RE NOT MY PRECIOUSE PEOPLE!THEY'RE TRAITERS!I...'
"I DON'T WANT TO DIIIIE!"*Crack*
~Top Of The Ravine~
"NARUTO?NARUTO!Oh shit...what have I done?I just killed my own god child!"Jiraiya exclaimed.
A passing couple looked over at him,shocked,before the woman screamed,"BASTARD!"
"...Minato...what have I done...?'he asked himself as he fell to his knees.
~Konoha~
"-ow,right?And he's so-"*BOOM*'WHAT WAS THAT!"Looking up,Nii Yugito was greeted with the site of a humongous toad hopping towards the Hokage's tower with a solemn looking man on top of it,that was...crying?
"Huh...Well it's not any of my business...Now back to my order,I want 5 pounds of Sushi in 5 Minutes ago,NOW!"
"YES MA'AM,PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!"
~Hokage's Tower~
"Oh Kioko...You Dirty,dirty girl you!Wh-"*Knock,Knock*,"Huh,oh yes,Come in!"
"Sarutobi-Sensei..."
"Jiraiya,what are you doing back so early,where's Naruto?"
"He's...he's dead Sarutobi-Sensei..."
"WHAT?WHAT HAPPENED?"
"I was trying to teach him how to summon the toads,but he couldn't summon GamaBunta. So to try to get him to tap into the Kyuubi's power,I...I uh...I pushed him off of the ravine outside of the village..."
"WHAT!"Moving faster then anyone in the village thought possible,the old man had the Toad Sannin pinned to the wall by his neck."DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE?HOW COULD YOU KILL YOUR OWN GOD SON!...Minato and Kushina trusted you,I trusted you and Kakashi,and Tsunade,and Rin,wherever the hell she is, and had you four been there like you were SUPPOSED to be...Maybe Naruto wouldn't have had his child hood taken away.
Maybe Naruto would have had a family to call his own...I wasn't even there for him most of the time...But YOU...this has taken it too far Jiraiya!Minato wanted Naruto to be seen a HERO,not KILLED BY YOU!Of all people Jiraiya,of ALL people...it was YOU!Just what in the HELL possessed you Jiraiya?"
"Sarutobi...Sensei...I"
"NO!I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!At the prelimanaries...I'm going to announce his death and his heritage. Then I'm...No...YOU'RE going to stand in the middle of that stadium and tell EVERYONE there that YOU killed him...even HER..."
"You mean..."
"That's right...Naruto's fiance. She was told he was dead,and when she finds out he was alive,only to also find out he's dead 'again',she's going to kill someone...And I'M not protecting you."
"*Gulp*"
~Ravine~
"W-Where am I?"
"You're in hell kid."
"Huh,who are you?"
"My name's Dante kid."
"That's a funny name!"
"AND YOUR FUNNY LOOKING!"
"BASTARD!"
"PUNK!"
"DANTE!You're arguing with a TWELVE year old..."
"But Vergil!HE STARTED IT!"
"Dante...I worry about you sometimes..."
"That's enough you two."
"Yes sir!"
"As funny as this is,WHERE THE HELL AM I!"
"Like I said,You're in hell kid."
"You expect me to believe that a place with the four of you,and me,is hell?"Naruto asked in a skeptic voice.
"No,I expect you to believe this is hell,because of him."Dante replied,pointing at the humongouse,three headed dog gaurding a gate with two doors."Hey Cerberus,We have a none believer!"One of the three heads looked at him curiosly for a moment before the dog started trotting over,the ground shaking with paw that hit the ground.
When it stopped in front of Naruto,it lowered it's heads that started sniffing him. Then, it finally pulled its heads back before shaking them,and started growling ...RIGHT before Naruto dropped down onto his knees in front of Cerberus screaming,
"I BELIEVE!I BELIEVE!I BELIEVE THIS IS HELL,AND THAT YOU NEED A DOG BREATH MENT!"
"It's okay Cerberus,BACK TO WORK!"
"WOOF,WOOF!"The dog...dogs...WHATEVER replied before trotting back...wagging its tail...
"HAHAHA!YOU WERE SCARED OF A DOG THAT ACTS LIKE A PUPPY!"
"HERE!But when he's up there...*SHIVER*!"
"...okay...if this is hell...WHAT AM I DOING HERE!"
"Oh that's easy!We sensed our last decendant,that's you,was going to die,so we brought you here."Dante replied.
"To be severly dissapointed."Vergil cut in."We thought you had already used a Devil Trigger,only to find that you used a lowly DEMONS power. You have a lot of molding to do."
"...that's cold man..."
"But true Naruto,look at the way you're dressed. What are you,a delinquit?"
"Look,all we're saying is that you have alot of training to since time runs differently here then it does in your world.5 years here is 5 minutes in your world."
"WHAT!"
"That's right. From here on out it's your own personal hell...conveiniet...isn't it?"
"Eh.."
"How long can you be gone before people start to miss you?"
"Uh...a month..."
"Hehehe,in 20 minutes in your world,it'd be a hundred years here."
"WHAT!"
"Don't worry,you don't age in hell."
"Oh thank the lord."
"You should be begging US for mercy right now!"
"*Sigh*Before we start,let's get to know each other!"Dante insisted.
"Fine,he's Dante,He's Vergil,That's lord Sparda,and I'm Nero,let the training begin brat!"
"*Gulp*"
"To begin,let's unlock that devil blood in you!"
~Konoha~
"AND ANOTHER THING JIRAIYA!"Before the Sandaime could finish his rant,he Jiraiya,and an unkown amount of others were floored by an evil aura that was suffocating.
But as soon as it began,it ended."What was that!It was like the Kyuubi!"
"No,Jiraiya,it was worse,and you better hope it doesn't come back to bite you in the ass."
"I already am Sarutobi-Sensei...I already am..."
~1 Month Later~
"Where's Sasuke-Kun and Naruto-Baka?"Sakura asked.
"I don't know."
'Naruto,forgive this old man for not protecting you.'Sarutobi thought from the Kage booth.
"The first match of the Chunin exams are about to begin!"the proctor called."Will Naruto Uzumaki and Neji Hyuuga please come to the arena!Naruto Uzumaki!If Naruto Uzumaki does not report to the arena in the next 60 seconds,he will be disqualified!"
~Genin~
'Where's Naruto-Kun?'
'WHERE IS THAT BAKA!'
"It's not like Naruto to be late like this..."
"Troublesome...but no it's not...he would have usually been here by now..."
"If he can be here at all."
"SHINO!DON'T TALK LIKE THAT!"
~Arena~
'Hmph...I guess that loser finally figured out fate wanted me to win...'
"10...9...8...7-"
"Excuse me proctor!"
"Yes Hokage-Sama."
"Naruto Uzumaki...passed away during this month..."Immediatley the Konoha civilains,and some of the shinobi erupted into chears."SHUT UP!I also want you all to know that you are chearing for the death of the son of One Namikaze Minato,and Kushina Uzumaki!"As soon as those two names were uttered the crowd went silent,and Jiraiya spoke up.
"It's my fault...I wanted him to tap into the Kyuubi's power to summon GamaBunta,so I pushed him off of a Ravine..."Jiraiya squeezed his as shut as the eyes of the stadium were on him,and tears slipped down his cheeks."If anyone wants to say something,say it respects,what he was like,how-"
"About I'm here."
"Huh?"Looking up,he and everyone else,saw a boy that looked to be 16.
He wore black anbu style pants with green flames around the ankles,and in those green flames were human skulls,that looked to be screaming. Forgoing the traditional ninja sandals,he had on greaves that had BeoWulf ingraved into them. He wore a black muscle shirt with the Grim Reaper grinning evily,and written above it was the phrase,'Death Is Right In Front Of you.'
Over that Muscle shirt he wore a black T-Shirt sleeved leather Trench Cloak(Trench coat with cloak hood).Written on the back of the trench coat was,Titan in kanjees. Around the sleeves and bottom of the Trench Cloak were green flames with screaming skull in them like his on his pants. On his hands were gauntlets,also ingraved was the name BeoWulf. Tattood on his left arm was the Wolf of Legends Fenrir,and on his right,the gaurd to the gates of hell, Cerberus.
Put on over the shirt was a 'Police Gun Holster' That was brought from beyond the 'veil'.In the three holster on it were three 'guns' that had said Ivory,the second Ebony and finally,Blue Rose.
Strapped on his back were six swords with names ingraved into the sheathes. The first had Sparda ingraved into them,Yamato,Rebellion,Alastor and finally Red queen. Then, finally placed on his hips were two Scimitars,one red and one blue,each said a different name. One read Agni while the other read Rudra.
On his face had what seemed to be squigly lines that spread out like tree branches,birth marks,that started at the base of his neck and went to the middle of his cheek bones. His eyes were a demonic red,with snow white hair.
"Who are you!"Jiraya questioned.
"That depends...who are you talking to?"a voice asked from around,Jiraiya saw the same boy.
"What the!"Swinging around,he still saw the boy,but he started fading.
"Don't bother,it's an after image."the boy stated in a monotone that sent chills down the veteran's spines in the arena."And you should remember me very well ...after all...you shoved me off of that Ravine..."
"Naruto!"
"No,it's Dante Sparda,now get out of the arena before I kick Hyuuga's AND your ass."
"B-b-but!"
"We'll talk about it later Old Man."Dante cut him off sharply as he glared at the Hyuuga."Proctor,start the match."
"Huh,oh,right,The match between Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze-"
"Dante Sparda!"
"...Right,the match between Dante Sparda and Neji Hyuuga begins !(Begin!)"
"Hmph,you may have changed your looks,your weapons and your name,but you are still a nobody loser,and fate has decreed that it will remain that way on this day."
Narrowing his eyes,Dante(I'm calling Naruto Dante now,'cause in my other stories when I called him Naruto but he announced himself another name,it confused the HELL out of me!)grabbed the handle of Yamato before unsheathing the sword,and then...nothing...he dissapeared...
Only to reapear behind Neji,already sheathing Yamato. Finally, he shut it with a click before Neji's chest and back exploded,blood flying 3 feet away before pooling around him.
"There you go Caged Bird...I have freed you...By breaking your neck."Dante stated in the same Montone as before.
"*Gurgle*"
"Shousha (Winner) Dante Sparda,can we get the EMT now!HURRY UP!"
"He'll be fine...though if I had've aimed over,and an inch deeper,that wouldn't be the case now would it? Hinata!"
"Huh?"
"I don't care about this contest,therefore I don't mind getting disqualified. Now, you come down here and stop me,or I kill Neji where he stands."
"NANI?(WHAT?)"
"Hurry up...Neji doesn't have all day."
Standing up,bangs covering her eyes,Hinata traveled to the arena floor,where Naruto smirked.
"Well?"
Raising her head up,her eyes held a determined fire."I WON'T LET YOU HURT NEJI-NII SAN!"
"There you go Neji,there's the girl you tried to kill...protecting you from me."Dante stated as Neji watched on in shock. Naruto pulled a pill out of his pocket, before he flicked it to Neji."Eat that,you'll be fine you sissy,but if I hear you've made Hinata cry...you know how a father is protective of his daughter?"
"Y-y-ye-ah...*Gulp*"
"I'll be 92% worse."
"NANI!"
"That's right,that bad."
Turning his back on the two Hyuuga,Dante dissapeared,only to repear by the Hokage and Jiraiya."We need to talk."
~30 Minutes Later~
After kicking the third Hokage's and Jiraiya's asses,they had finally got regrouped where Sarutobi promised that he wouldn't listen to the council anymore,and when Sasuke didn't show for his match,Dante was put in his place. And then...the shit hit the fans...and it stunk...
"Wait...who in the hell Writes this shit!"
"I don't know we just follow it..."
"*Sigh* ON WITH THE STORY!"
Naruto stood across from Gaara."Gaara...as the devil...it is my job to send you and your mother back to HELL!"
Shaking so much that Gaara lost control of his Chakra,a genjutsu dropped revealing...
"THE HELL!YOU'RE A GIRL!I KNEW IT!"Naruto screamed,dropping his monotone."ONLY A GIRL CAN GIVE YOU A HEADACHE AS BIG AS THE ONE YOU GAVE ME!"(Please don't kill me!)
"Get out of my way loser."
"*Sigh*And after all of that...I wish I could say it's nice to see you again Sasuke,Kakashi...but that'd be a lie..."
"I SAID GET OUT OF MY WAY!"
Sasuke drew his hand back,and swung,only for his fist to meet the blade of Rebellion.
"You had your chance Sasuke,it's my turn now..."
"HOKAGE-SAME!"Kakashi complained,"YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS-"He was cut off as Red Queen poised itself at his throat.
"My father would be SO dissapointed...get out of the arena...or I kill you...right here,right now."
"B-but...Naruto-"
"Dante!"
"W-whatever,HOKAGE-SAMA!"
"KAKSHI,GET OUT!"
"B-but...yes Hokage-Sama...at once..."Kakashi replied,pulling Sasuke's shoulder.
"Sorry about that Gaara...or is that your name...anyway let's get this over with!"
"Let's."
Rushing forward,Dante slung Sparda out of it's sheath before reapearing behind Gaara's sand that once protected her before it...blew into bits,much like Neji's chest and back. Dante looked at the shaking girl.
"Now,with that sand out of the way...Yamato will have an easy target...Any last words?"
"Proctor...I...I QUIT!I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"Gaara sobbed as she dropped to her knees. Sheathing Yamato,Dante walked over to her as the proctor called the match.
"Gaara..."
"Huh?"
"Stay out of the invasion...and you won't die...and I think you know that I know that we both know,that that man in the Kage booth,isn't your father. You help the leaf,you stay in the leaf. But it's your decision."Dante stated,walking back to his seat in the competitors booth,but before he could get to his seat in the challenger's booth,he was stopped by one of the random news paper guy.
"Naruto Namikaze-"
"Dante Sparda."
"Right...anyway,now that you are going to the Semi Final,WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NEXT?"
Suddenly Naruto's monotone face dropped,replaced by a smile and sparkling eyes."PIZZA AND SODA-"
"PIZZA AND SODA!"Dante was takled to the ground by another silver blur,revealing a man that looked a lot like Naruto,"WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR MAN!LET'S GO!"
"HELL YEAH!"
"I worry about them sometimes Vergil."
"As do I Nero."
"Don't we all?"Sparda asked looking at them.
"...Good Point..."
"...Good Point..."
In the distance they all here a "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T SELL PEPPERONI AND SAUSAGE YOU ONLY SELL THEM SEPERATE MAKE A NEW PIZZA WITH BOTH BEFORE I BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF" Everybody sweatdropped at this even Orochimaru who was thinking "Note to self don't piss them off"
PJ:I'm done
Who's Naruto's Fiance?
Will Naruto actually want to marry her?
Gaara's a girl?
What happened to Kyuub?
Is Kyuubi a girl?
Who will Naruto be paired with?
Why am I asking you all this?
BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO VOTE!
GOODNIGHT LADIES AND GENTLE MEN!