A/N: My first post in awhile. It is heavily personally inspired, though I myself do not have any children...It takes place in the far off future where Castle and Beckett have a two year old son, named Mason. Here we go!
Child's Pose
"Walk your feet slowly to the front of your mat and slowly begin to unfold." The sun was just beginning to set and streaming in the yoga studio and bouncing off the hardwood floors. The yoga instructor with her audiobook-like voice was telling the students to breathe. Kate, whose mat was unfortunately right in the beam of sunlight, was trying her hardest to control her breathing despite the beads of sweat falling off her forehead and trying to balance in a fly-away.
"Now inhale. Feel your ribs expand to the breath of new air." Yoga was not particularly Kate's thing. She came every once in awhile, each time when she was upset, trying to look for its appeal, but alas, she has not found it yet.
Inhale.
The teacher's voice drifts to the back of her mind as she recalls the events from earlier. Castle had come home, two large grocery bags in each hand and as usual, grinning for ear to ear. "You'll never guess what I have in this bag." Kate squinted at it. "Your x-ray vision isn't going to help you. Its x-ray vision proof!" He exclaimed excitedly in response to her squinting.
Before she could answer his question, she could hear the thumping of small feet on the floor shortly followed by "Daddy! Daddy!" Castle lifted their two year old son into the air, dropping the bags and emptying their contents all over the floor. Mason pointed to the groceries on the floor and declared loudly, "tomato!"
Castle was beaming with pride.
"Now interlace your thumbs and press your biceps to your ears." Kate returned back to reality. She was sitting in a thunderbolt pose and trying to breathe again. "Exhale, releasing all your feelings from moments before you arrived here. Let the day flow out of your lungs, your ribs, let them all go."
Exhale.
Kate wished she could let them all go. Moments after Castle had announced that the family was going to make pizza that night, they were arguing again. It was like a broken record on loop. They argued about the drapes, the couches, work, child-safety locks, and driving. They left Mason sitting in his high-chair screaming, begging them to stop. They argued seemingly non-stop and worst of all recently, it had made Kate wonder how much was enough?
They argued about nothing; about the same nothing over and over again. They always talked about it, and never came to a resolution. Castle never wanted to talk about it. He just wanted to let it be, let it scar and move on.
Inhale.
She could feel a sense of sadness pervading through her chest as she tried to wash her old thoughts away with new ones. Her thoughts were stubborn and refused to leave her mind.
"Katie, we can't always argue." He said just before she left out the door with just her keys and yoga mat.
"I know."
"What are we going to do." Mason had stopped crying and was simply sniffling in Castle's lap. The dog had joined them, lying down and looking up at Mason with almost human-like concern.
"We'll figure it out." Kate replied.
"We're just going through a rough patch. A few speed bumps that's all."
"Just a few speed bumps." Castled repeated.
Exhale.
Yoga's focus was on the breath, breathing; being very aware of your body. Signs written in typography were posted around the room reminding the practitioners to perform the involuntary function of breathing.
Kate knew that every relationship had its problems, but she was growing weary of the almost routine arguments. She was tired, exhausted. She didn't want to anticipate the next argument or feel like she ever has to defend herself. She hates to see Mason's smile turn into a frown whenever his parents argued.
Inhale.
"Take your final shavasana." The teacher said. Kate obeyed. "Let your limbs be limp and lifeless; the only part of you moving is the rising and falling of your belly and chest. Concentrate on your breath. You have completed a full cycle from life to death. Beginning in child's pose and ending here." Kate found this commentary eerie.
Every relationship will have its obstacles to overcome. She loved Castle and she would most certainly never leave Mason.
"This is the end, but notice that your breath still. This is life."
The teacher began to ring the Tibetan singing bowl as Kate concentrated on her life; her inhales and exhales. Her every sensation.
As the ringing resonated in her head and filled every single corner of her mind pushing her thoughts, concerns, and most importantly fears out she felt free. A sense of hope.
As she lay on the floor she felt the mysterious and reassuring sensation that everything was going to be okay. What a beautiful feeling. She wouldn't trade it for the world.
She smiled to herself. Everything was going to be okay.
When she went home she found Castle asleep on the couch, a book spread across his rising and falling stomach. He had been trying to read Marxist theory. Castle and Mason were her life now, and she would never let that slip away.
She wrapped his arms around his neck and he jolted awake.
"Hey." She said.
"Hey yourself. Did you have a good class?"
"Yeah."
"Mason's been asleep for about fifteen minutes now. He missed his Mommy."
"I'm glad."
"About earlier..."
Kate took three deep breaths, relishing the life that entered and exited her body. "Let's not talk about it now. Okay?"
"You sure?" Castle raised an eyebrow, but she caught the sense of relief that washed over him and she couldn't help but to smile. She kissed his cheek, then moved to the corner of his lips and kissed him there.
Kate looked at their son, sound asleep in his own shavasana, but so full of life."Yeah. I'm sure. Everything's going to be just fine."