Don't own it. This takes place somewhere after episode six (chronological), but it's spoiler-free. Rejoice and be glad.
The Trouble with Gaming
Haruhi has a habit of asking the opinions of others, namely me, and then not listening to or completely disregarding any given that differ from her own. This happens quite often when she's planning some ridiculous activity or making me and Koizumi (mostly me) do some sort of physical labor reminiscent of the slaves in Egypt while she, Nagato and Mikuru sit by and watch peacefully.
She does listen to common sense on important subjects, I'll admit - like not putting up the photos of Mikuru in her maid outfit on the internet - but truly important or meaningful events in SOS Brigade are few and far between, and thus, so are these brief intervals of sanity from Haruhi. Most of the time she's already made a decision and is just asking others' opinions for show, to give the Brigade the illusion of democracy when, in fact, I find it to be much closer to a totalitarian form of government. And, since Itsuki is a yes man, Mikuru is too scared to stand up to her and Nagato is close to being mute, any protests I might have are completely without additional support and easily drowned out.
With all of this in mind, I believe you'll be able to understand why, on a Friday morning in late spring, I answered the following question with no seriousness or thought whatsoever. While poking my back with a pencil for attention, Haruhi asked:
"What should Mikuru's next outfit be?"
Like an idiot, I replied with, "Ninja girl."
"Ninja girl?"
The interest in her voice, and the fact that she'd actually listened to what I said was enough to make me turn around. She was resting her head against her right hand and giving me a wide-eyed, deceptively innocent look. Don't try that on me, Haruhi. I know you too well. There was curiosity in her eyes as she went on. "Why a ninja girl?"
"They're popular at the current time, aren't they? There's a lot of video games with ninja as main characters and they fly off the shelves. A cute ninja girl is pretty much a staple character in a fighting game." I was mostly bullshitting this, of course, but I didn't want to look like an idiot or a pervert by just saying 'ninja girl' with no reason behind it. Somehow I don't think it would matter much to her, though, as I'm already defined as an idiot in her eyes as well as the only Brigade member that stands up to her.
Unfortunately, Haruhi was listening to this garbage with a serious face. "That's not a bad idea, Kyon. I'm impressed! The only problem," she said, leaning forward now and tapping her chin, "is that I don't own any games like those. You'll have to do the research for this one and find an outfit-"
"I could just show you some games." I swear that these words came from my mouth completely involuntarily - my brain was in no way involved, because then I would have properly thought out the possible consequences.
Haruhi's brief expression of annoyance at being interrupted at the start of what doubtlessly would have turned into an impressive speech immediately transformed into the bright smile she gets when she believes that she's come up with some amazing idea; this smile always means trouble. "That's perfect! Tomorrow is Saturday, so bring your console and games to my place."
"Wait, what are you saying? Ask if I have plans first before ordering me around on weekends!"
"You never do. Stop complaining and just do it!"
I really hate that she's right about me never having plans, but I could very well blame that fact on her taking up so much of my time for herself. You can't be selfish like that and then say that it's my fault! "I'm not dragging a console all the way to your house just to play games for a day. If you want to do that, then come to mine. It's much more sensible to do it that way." I should also mention that the thought of meeting her parents terrified me.
Haruhi frowned at me, sour that I'd actually raised a valid point to avoid doing more useless physical labor, and scrunched her nose in a way that might be called endearing. "Fine. But you better be prepared to properly entertain me as your guest - there's a penalty if you don't!" Those clear eyes, a finger pointing in my face and a commanding tone are things that I've become much too used to.
Anything else I might have said was cut off by class starting. As it went on and my mind naturally drifted out the window like a ghost quietly leaving a room, I began to think seriously about the previous conversation. Would Haruhi really try to get a ninja girl outfit for Mikuru? I already knew the answer to that: yes, of course. Haruhi is always dead serious. What new future horrors have I created for Mikuru with my thoughtless comment? I should apologize. The thought of Haruhi attacking Mikuru with some new piece of revealing clothing and inflicting even more emotional trauma is going to be wracking me with guilt all day, even if I feel indecently eager to see the way she looks in it. Oh, Mikuru, please forgive me!
More importantly, did I just invite Haruhi to spend the day at my house?
... Alone?
---
Oddly enough, we didn't speak about this visit for the rest of the day. During lunch Haruhi leapt up as usual to go walking around the school grounds, and when the five of us assembled in the club room after school, I kept my mouth shut because she seemed to be keeping the whole thing to herself. Haruhi was abnormally quiet that day, only surfing the internet for a while before leaving earlier than usual. I stayed with the others, as it feels abnormal to go before Nagato shuts her book. Koizumi and I played Othello until we received that unofficial signal for the end of the day, and then left the room when Mikuru shyly told us that she was going to change.
Haruhi's silence had unnerved me a bit – what was she thinking, not giving Mikuru hints about a new outfit on the way, or even turning the whole thing into an event that involved the entire Brigade? It wouldn't be atypical of her to extend my invitation to the other three without my permission. These stirring thoughts caused me to blurt out, "I'm spending the day with Haruhi tomorrow," as Koizumi and I waited in the hallway.
He looked at me with some surprise, his slightly absentminded smile fading for a moment before it returned with a much more genuine feeling. "Is that so?"
"Yeah. I somehow ended up inviting her over to my house to play video games. I'm not sure how it happened."
"Regardless, I imagine Suzumiya is quite pleased. I should probably thank you for keeping me from working this weekend, if everything goes well."
"I'll take the thanks, but I'm not sure about the pleased part – you saw how quiet she was. When Haruhi is happy about something she bounces about like a rubber ball and throws around strange ideas."
"Well, while she is quite content, at the same time she's feeling nervous about tomorrow."
"Why would she be nervous?"
He stroked his nose in that odd habit of his. "You're spending the day alone, without the rest of the Brigade, correct? You haven't done this in quite some time, so naturally she's feeling a bit anxious."
"... I'm not following you. Hey, what are you laughing at?"
Koizumi hid a grin that appeared at my own expense with his hand. "I'm sorry. Perhaps it is only so clear to me because of my connection with her. I believe that you'll understand at some point tomorrow, though."
"I don't need you patronizing me. There are already enough mysterious things going on, so I don't want to feel like I'm missing something right in front of me."
Mikuru came out of the classroom then, thankfully putting a stop to our conversation, and Nagato trailed out after her. It was somewhat out of the ordinary for us all to leave school together like this, but I personally found it useful as I informed Nagato and Mikuru how I would be spending time the next day while we all changed into our outdoor shoes. Nagato only gave her typical tiny nod, and Mikuru smiled sweetly and wished the both of us a good time. Oh, if only you knew how it had come about, you would be much more anxious about the upcoming Monday. Nothing, though, is going to make me confess to Mikuru what tomorrow is really about, just in case I can divert Haruhi from her ridiculous idea before she decides to torture the Brigade's mascot another time.
We went our separate ways afterwards. I pondered the conversation I'd had earlier with Koizumi as I walked home; I didn't figure out anything new. Instead it just left me feeling frustrated that the esper boy was hiding something from me. I did notice, though, that as time went on I was putting less effort into trying to completely halt Haruhi's plans and much more into altering them enough so that nobody – namely her – got in trouble with the law. I suppose it's much the same as how it's useless to try and stop a bulldozer in its tracks, but you might have more success making it go on a different path so it doesn't destroy your house.
Whatever. I was lying down for at least an hour in my bed that night before I fell asleep, since I was dreading the next day – or anticipating it. To be honest, I'm not sure. During that time it never occurred to me that although I had mentioned my plans to my mother, neither Haruhi or I had thought to set a time for tomorrow.
This, as anybody who knows that girl might imagine, was a mistake.
Feedback is awesome, just in case you were wondering. The second part will be longer.