SHADOWY GO
Chapter1: Encounter of the third kind.
It was springtime when the cherry trees began to bloom when Hikaru's young life had taken a turn for the worst. He was up in his grandfather's attic rummaging for something to sell, without his grandpa's permission of course when he noticed what look like a tea table with grid lines on the surface. Well actually if it wasn't for the two beautifully carved wooden bowls sitting on top of it, he wouldn't have noticed. Amidst the paintings, calligraphy of ancient masters and scrolls, the bowls were the only things shiny there.
His grandfather is a hoarder and he had acquired a lot of stuff through the years. Weird stuff as Hikaru sees it. Surely some of his grandpa's collection would fetch a good price if pawned?
It was the start of the school year and Hikaru just entered junior high and he needed money to supplement his allowance. He was only given 1000 yen per week which was, let's face it, that's just ridiculous. Honestly, he doesn't know what era his parents were living in. So yeah, he had a train card for going to school and back, a phone card to call them in case of emergency, a bento which his mother makes and forces on him but really, there were more important things he needed to buy. Like shounen jump manga, video games and stuff every self-respecting teenager couldn't do without.
Hikaru approached the table to take a good look at the two bowls. They were really quiet pretty, shaped like a balloon with a wide bottom and it was polished to perfection it would catch anybody's eye. He opened the loose fitting lid and stared at the bunch of black stones inside. He removed one for closer inspection, it was convex on both sides. He opened the other bowl, the same stones but white this time.
"A board game?" He murmured to himself. He had seen this kind of stones before played by old men at the park. Although they hadn't played on a table like this one but used some sort of chipboard, smaller in size but with the same intersecting lines. He didn't care then but what kid would?
Hikaru removed the wooden bowls and put it at the side, out of the way. He then pulled the table to check all sides for damage. He didn't think there were any but he wanted to make sure. "I wonder how much this thing cost," he thought to himself. It was a little heavy but he could always ask Shibuya or Tagami to help him move it. It wasn't that he couldn't lift it but with the two bowls and stones too, it was not exactly what you could fit into your pocket.
He noticed that there seemed to be a red stain like blood running from the corner to one side. He wondered if it was part of the design or his grandpa just didn't clean it right. But that was highly unlikely knowing him. It wouldn't find its way into his attic if some dirt was still on it. He tried to rub it off but it wouldn't come off. "Part of the design then," he murmured. And that's when he heard a voice, "You can see it? You can see the stain?" Hikaru's heart jumped into his throat. His grandpa is in Kagawa-ken right now with his old priest buddies, his grandma is in the kitchen baking some goodies for him. So for all intent and purposes he should be alone, right?
Hikaru jumped up from his crouching position ready for battle and took a quick look around to find the source of the voice. "Who are you? Show yourself? Let me tell you, I'm a black belt. I'll kick your ass from here 'till Sunday if you touch grandpa's stuff!"
"You can hear me? You can hear my voice?"
Hikaru felt goosebumps all over. The hair at the back of his neck was standing up, all of his hairs were standing up. He was not a coward, where it matters. But the voice he was looking for was not in any direction but was all around him, behind him and so close. He felt cold all of a sudden as a rush of cold damp air enveloped him. His grandpa's attic which usually feels like a safe haven seems ominous now.
His whole body trembled involuntarily, he never felt this scared in his entire life. He was going to make a run for it, pride be damned when he met a shock of white wispy apparition as he turned around. Hikaru's scream died in his throat as he fainted. A soft thud could be heard as he dropped like a ton of bricks to the wooden floor. The last thing he remembered or rather heard was a voice, "Kami-sama, thank you. I will now return to the world of the living." Even as his conciousness dimmed, he noticed that the voice was not anywhere else but in his head.
xxxxxxx
His grandmother found him in the attic beside the table and thought he just fell asleep. He woke up with his grandma shaking him gently, calling his name. "You should have gone to the guest room if you were that tired Hikaru. I know you like it here but don't sleep on the bare floor like your grandfather does." His grandma chided at him. "Come, the cookies are done and I'll have tea ready."
He couldn't remember what really happened but he knew he fainted but he wasn't goint to tell his grandma that. His grandma went on ahead and he slowly followed down through the small passage way that connects the attic to the living room. The passage way was skillfully hidden with paper panels, you wouldn't know it's there. He still feels a little groggy as he slid the paper panel door open and entered the twenty-four-tatami mat room. He approached the low tea table and sat down on the tatami covered floor. He reached for a pillow which was stacked on one side and pushed it under him, his grandpa never uses pillow but prefer to sit in seiza instead. Hikaru sprawled in an ungraceful heap waiting for his tea and cookies to be served.
"Your lack of height is a good thing Hikaru. There's only a short distance between you and the floor, I'm glad you're not hurt."
"What, how..." Hikaru wriggled around trying to locate the voice.
"You can only see me in your mind's eye, Hikaru. I am not of this world anymore. I live only in your consciousness."
"Oh man, I sure am going crazy. I really didn't hear that." Hikaru laugh.
"Why do you say that Hikaru? I know you can hear me."
"I seriously didn't hear that." Hikaru beat at the side of his head with his fist.
"But Hikaru..." The voiced trailed off as Hikaru interrupted it.
"Shut up, shut up, shut up, just shut the hell up!"
"Hikaruuu... so ferocious." The voice whined like a child.
"Aaargh!" He screamed in frustration.
"Hikaru, are you all right?" His grandma alarmed hurriedly put the tray of cookies and tea on the table, knelt down and reached for him and checked his forehead. "Are you cold? Do you hurt anywhere?"
"I'm fine grandma, I just felt like screaming." Hikaru tried to laugh it off.
His grandma didn't seem to believe him but took his word for it anyway. "Hikaru if you have a problem, your grandpa and I... will always be here for you, alright? Hikaru just nodded, he never thought his grandma would say stuff like that to him. He felt embarrassed, the words felt heavy. He was not ready for that kind of talk.
"Grandma, I'm going home after I finish this cup. Mom would be looking for me. It's almost 5 o'clock and it'll be time for dinner by the time I get back."
"Alright, be careful and bring these cookies home with you. I know your sister loves them." His grandma's soft smile made him think everything was alright.
"Yeah OK, thanks grandma." His grin with a hint of embarrassment.
Hikaru blowed on his cup and tried to sip his tea in a hurry. He wanted to get away as soon as possible. Ghosts were suppose to haunt one place so if he leave it will be left behind or so he thought.
"Hikaru, don't make a sound while sipping your tea. It's considered very unrefine." The voice admonished.
"I'm not talking to you." Hikaru gulped the rest of his tea, grabbed the bag of cookies and shot out of there while hollering to his grandma, "I'm going home now, grandma!"
xxxxxxx
It was only an hour walk from his grandparent's house to his home if he hurry but that if it's not winter. With the snow and slick ice he can't use the shortcuts and he had to walk real careful so he won't slip but since snow rarely happen, it was not a problem. It was spring and the scenery was simply beautiful and with the cherry trees in bloom, it became absolutely breathtaking. Hikaru forgot all about his problem for almost an hour when the incessant voice calling his name began again?
"Ohhh! Hikaru, Hikaru, Hikaruuu... I almost forgot how beautiful the cherry blossoms are." The voice was full of wonder as they cross the Japanese garden of Shinjuko-gyoen.
He couldn't really blame it for there was truth in what it said. He is luckier than most, he lives in a nice neighborhood. His grandfather, Shindou Heihachi is a shinto priest and lives within the temple grounds and also act as a caretaker. The Hie Shrine is located downtown of Akasaka on a hill, so even if it is surrounded by the city it still feels isolated. The torii easily marks it and you have to actually go up several stone steps and reach another torii to enter the courtyard. There are lots of temples in this one small hill, lots of steps from all sides artfully hidden and integrated with the trees and foliage. Hie Jinja might not be as popular as the other shrines in Japan but Hikaru have always loved it. It's a combination of old and new.
From his grandpa's house he had to cross a park which he doesn't mind at all, pass by a stadium, a gymnasium, and another park. Hikaru's house is actually situated opposite that park adjacent to the back entrance.
"You're a ghost, aren't you? Why are you haunting me? Did I do some grievous wrong to you? I'm only thirteen, you know? I couldn't possibly do something that bad yet." Hikaru got it all out in a rush. He didn't want to talk to it for that would only confirm its existence.
"I don't know Hikaru. I know I died but I can't remember how. All I know is that I still want to play igo. I lived in that goban for I don't know how long, waiting for someone to play with. Ne, ne, Hikaru. Do you play igo?" An ingratiating voice asked.
Hikaru would have laughed, if he didn't feel like crying. He was talking to the voice in his head which means he now have a personal ghost or worst, he could be crazy. Crazy people do not realized they're crazy, that's why they're crazy in the first place.
"That game is only for old geezers and people who doesn't have a life, no pun intended." Hikaru's tone with much hostility. "I wouldn't play that game even if you pay me."
"Waaahhh! Hikaruuu... so mean!" The ghost cried. It kept crying, wailing in his head, it's making him sick to his stomach.
"Stop it already! What are you a kid? You're so noisy, you make me want to puke!" Hikaru shouted out loud and kicked the stone viciously that was in his way. It was a good thing there were no people in that side of town at the moment.
"But Hikaru, I'm so sad. I was so lonely for a long time and now that you've found me... I thought I would finally have someone. But you don't even like igo, waaahhh!"
"What's got igo got to do with anything?" Hikaru bit out.
"Igo is what I live for Hikaru."
"Oh yeah? In case you haven't notice, you're not alive!" Hikaru snarled a retort.
The voice didn't answer but started wailing instead. The sensation of wanting to puke got so bad he had to stop and leaned on a tree or he would have keeled over. His stomach started rumbling and he didn't know whether to throw up or poop. He knew the ghost had something to do with it. He was in a cold sweat and was beginning to feel dizzy. If he do not say anything soon, he'd probably faint again.
"It's fine, we can play igo if you want. Just stop all this caterwauling. Really, you'd be the death of me." Hikaru said faintly. He didn't have the energy to say anything witty.
"Really Hikaru? We will do that? When, when ,when...? I want to play, I want to play, let's play Hikaru, let's play now!" The voice urgent in its need.
"Not now, I don't have a go board and I don't know how to play." Before it gets sad again and kill him he added. "But soon OK? You've waited for a long time, a week will not matter."
"O... OK Hikaru. But Hikaru, what's OK?" The voice asked.
"Uuugh! It means alright." Hikaru was at the end of his patience.
"Well, you could have just said so." The voice sounded like it was offended.
"Whatever, just shut up for now and let me think. You're giving me a headache."
They walked in comparative silence. The ghost although not talking was happy, he can feel it. He let out a deep sigh. His mind, the only place where he can truly call his own has now an uninvited guest he can't get rid of.
xxxxxxx
Hikaru found himself sitting by the window of his classroom which he thought was really lucky for him. He likes to look outside once in awhile to relieve his boredom. The teacher allowed them to pick their seats but the tall ones were usually relegated to the very back. During elementary they were seated in alphabetical order and that was how he got close to his two buddies, Shibuya Takeo and Tagami Towa. They've been together since the first grade but now he got separated from them by a different section. He's in class I-2 while those two are in class I-3.
Hikaru was in a bad mood that morning, what kind of school gives exam on the first day of class? And on top of that, he thinks he's going crazy. I mean if you hear voices inside your head, you're so not sane, right? "Of course, Hikaru." The voice in his head answered. "Just shut up!" Hikaru was so aggravated he felt like beating the crap out of someone. Preferably the owner of the voice. Beat his own head then? "But Hikaru that would hurt you more than it would hurt me, ne?" The voice sounded amused which made Hikaru even more angry, he almost choked on his own irritation.
"Shindou Hikaru!" Another voice grated on his nerves.
"What!" He snarled then realized he just snapped at his teacher. "Oh crap!" He muttered under his breath.
And that's when he noticed the silence in the room. Weren't their teacher talking about them being no longer kids and responsibilities and the likes? He didn't really listen. He looked around and took in the wide eyed stares of his new classmates, some scared and some with almost akin to respect which was crazy. I mean, this was the first day of school. He haven't done anything yet.
"Young man, you will stay for detention after class." His homeroom teacher's voice dripping ice.
"Ne, ne, Hikaru. What's detention?" He wanted to scream at the voice inside his head. His frustration was clearly showing in his face. The voice had been pestering him non stop since their first encounter. It was like a child asking for what and how of things, only he couldn't get away from it or tune it out.
He smiled at the teacher wanting to apologize for spacing out. But with the voice in his head, the feeling of confusion and agitation, a smile was all he could manage. He didn't realize that his smile wasn't as pacifying as he thought. With his turmoil at the forefront, he looked more like threatening than peaceful.
xxxxxxx
He was eating in the cafeteria at a table which can seat four people but oddly enough no one seems to want to sit with him. It was twelve noon and the cafeteria was busy with students lining up for lunch. Some students were standing around looking for seats with their trays or bento in hand and yet no one approached his table. It looked like they would rather just leave to find other spots in the campus or stick together uncomfortably at one table than sit with him? What's up with that? He saw his friends, Tagami and Shibuya as soon as they entered the cafeteria. He waived at them and motioned them to sit with him.
"Hey Shindou! What's this I heard? You told your homeroom teacher to shut up? Man you're brave, I grant you that." Tagami laughed as he put his bento on the table.
"I did no such thing!" He retorted. And then again, did he? He was talking to the ghost, he's the one he told to shut up. "Oh shit!" He cursed silently. Did he said it out loud? Is that why he was getting detention?
"Don't deny it man. You're the talk of the town, so to speak. Geez! I would've love to have been there when Shindou said that." Tagami cackled like a hyena.
"Hikaru, Hikaru, who are these boys? Do they play igo?" That voice again.
Hikaru felt a large tick forming on his forehead. He didn't really want to deal with it right now. Hikaru closed his eyes, took a deep breath and tried to think of happy thoughts. He tried with all his might to ignore it since he can't really tune it out.
"It was just a misunderstanding, I will apologize once she's calmed down." Hikaru smiled, but it look painful on his face.
"Don't worry about it Shindou, she'll forget about it as long as you don't do anything stupid again." Shibuya predicted.
Between Tagami and Shibuya, it was Shibuya that Hikaru really felt close to. They don't talk all that much when they're together but somehow they understood each other better. Tagami on the other hand filled in the silence, he was their balance. He would keep the conversation going and he would be grateful especially if he felt like not talking. He suspected Shibuya of the same, without Tagami they would've probably repelled each other.
xxxxxxx
Hikaru was sitting alone in class for his detention. His teacher was having him write down 'I'm sorry for being disrespectful towards sensei. I deeply regret my action.' five hundred times, and his right hand was already stiff and he's only about 150 at it.
"Ne, ne, Hikaru. Why are you writing that again and again?" The voice which he totally ignored for the whole day broke through his concentration. He didn't want to talk to it because he was pissed at it for landing him into this situation but he was bored out of his skull and couldn't help himself.
"I'm being punished for telling sensei to shut up this morning."
"Eeehhh really? But weren't you talking to me that time, Hikaru?"
"I know that and you know that but they don't. That's why don't talk to me when there are other people around." He growled.
"I'm sorry Hikaru, I didn't mean to get you in trouble. Would you like me to help you write that so you can rest your hand for awhile?" The voice offered.
"How can you help me, you don't have a body." Hikaru was surprised at that.
"Ah, but I can take over your left hand if you want." The voice seem excited.
"Oh yeah? And what's stopping you from completely taking over if I give you permission?" His voice low and menacing.
"I wouldn't do that Hikaru because that's just rude. You are my host and I am your guest. Besides, I couldn't even if I want to. You are the dominant soul after all." The voice sounded aggrieved by the accusation.
"Well whatever, my fingers sure are stiff. So do it then." Hikaru gave up, he was tired from his constant bickering with it. Without meaning to his left hand took the pen from his right. It didn't feel like it was possessed by something or someone. It felt like he's the one still writing and controlling the pen. If it weren't for the fact that he's right handed and couldn't write worth a damn with his left, he would have thought that it was still him doing the deed.
He found the silence eerie. He was beginning to get used to the voice's incessant chattering, it had been with him for three days now. The voice in his head was silent for the first time without him telling it to shut up and for the first time it was Hikaru who broke the silence.
"So what's your name? I have to call you something if we have to be together."
He can feel joy coursing through him. He knows it's not him because he had nothing to be happy about, so it must be the ghost. "My name is Fujiwara no Sai. All I know is I want to play igo forever. And I'm looking for someone or something but I've forgotten what it was." The ghost who called himself Sai seemed troubled.
"Well I hope you don't expect me to help you find it. Whatever it is, it must be long gone by now. What year were you born?" Hikaru continued on, he has nothing better to do and to tell the truth he was beginning to get curious now that his initial shock was over.
"I... I... I forgot Hikaru... but Emperor Daigo, I remember him."
"Daigo, huh. Well, I don't know him. Sounds familiar though."
"We're almost done Hikaru, a hundred more and..."
"Eeehhh...! What the hell? You wrote everything in kanji, Sai!"
"Am I not suppose to? I happen to know my kanji and calligraphy are very good. I remember my old teacher praising me for it and even said I could work as a scribe if I so wish. I've spent time with the written words quiet often. I think I studied in court but I'm not sure. My memory is hazy, it's just bits and pieces." Sai seemed proud of his accomplishment.
"Well, OK. Really Sai, my kanji is not that good. I have to have a kanji dictionary to write even a short note and sometimes furigana to read it. We mostly use hiragana and katakana now and some kanji, of course. I think I know about a thousand characters.
"Hikaru, in my time hiragana was mostly used by women and in writing personal letters, katakana and kanji for official document. This is for school, yes? Therefore we must treat it like an official document." Sai sounded happy. Come to think of it Sai's handwriting was so much better than his own.
"Hikaru, let me apologize to your sensei for you."
"Why? I'm the one that said it."
"I know but it was my fault all the same, yes?"
"No, I'll do it but I could use some help with choosing what to say."
xxxxxxx
Sensei Satonaka Midori was angry at the rude behavior displayed by one student named Shindou Hikaru but at the same time fascinated by the boy. As a student, Midori always made it a point to make a good impression to all her teachers. She would never tell any of them to shut up, not in a million years. But this kid told her to shut up right out of the bat and smiled that seem to threaten her control over the students.
She reported the incident to the principal but not before giving the brat a detention to teach him some manners. She was observing him without his knowledge and looking at him, he seems to be talking to himself. She was quiet amazed to see the child was ambidextrous. She had never met anyone who could write with either hands with what looks like the same degree of proficiency. She would have to check and see how good or bad his handwriting is. She went over to him when it looked like he was done. Her attitude was frosty, she didn't want him to get away with such rudeness.
"Sensei," Hikaru stood up as soon as he noticed that his teacher was there. "I'm very sorry for my rude behavior this morning. I was thinking of something else and the words just slipped out. It's no excuse but please forgive me." Hikaru bowed down low to his sensei to show how sorry he was. He was not usually this smooth or courteous but with the ghost inside him, it wasn't so bad. He didn't feel any embarrassment talking to a teacher like she was his equal. Is this the ghost's influence? Usually he would've just run away from a situation or let the problem resolve itself. He certainly would have been tongue-tied and won't be able to say anything but then again he wouldn't be in this situation either. Is Sai taking over him?
Midori was enchanted now. Wow! The kid is sure confident of himself. He's a tough one, she decided. She wouldn't like to alienate him or stretch the problem any further. She doesn't want to be on this kid's bad side either. So she smiled at him and reprimanded him in a soft manner befitting a teacher that truly cared for their students' future.
xxxxxxx
Hikaru couldn't wait to get home, he was glad that that problem was over and done with. Satonaka sensei is sure cool, she said she wouldn't contact his parents since it's the first day of school so she would cut him some slack but he won't be so lucky next time if he messes up again.
"Whew!" Hikaru let out a sound. He doesn't know if he could talk to anyone about this. I mean who would believe that he was being haunted by a whiny, irritating ghost? They'd probably think he was making it up or he was just plain nuts. I mean, a ghost? Come on. If it were someone else he wouldn't believe it either. In this day and age there are no such thing as ghosts.
"But Hikaru ghosts are real. When I was alive, we had priests come all the time to say prayers and burn incense to help the poor souls as they travel the three paths. They also exorcise demons and evil spirits that causes mischiefs..."
"Whaaat? You can be exorcised? My grandpa is a shinto priest... he could help me exorcise you..."
"Hikaruuu... so mean! I'm not an evil spirit... waaaahhh!"
"Yeah, yeah, shut up already. I don't want you talking while we are in the train station. Hikaru fell in line and waited for his turn to insert his Suica train card to the designated slot. He passed through the turnstile found a pillar and squatted waiting for the fast train that will take him to Shinjuko, oblivious to the throng of busy people rushing past him.
"Ne, ne, Hikaru... when are we going to play?" Sai's voice buzzed like an annoying fly in his head.
"Geez Sai, it's Monday and my first day ever in junior high. Let me get used to that first before anything else."
"Ne, ne Hikaru... how does the train works. I see no people or horses pulling them and it's faster than any cart I've ever been on."
"Hell if I know, fueled by gasoline or electricity. I'm not really sure and don't ask me what they are, I'm only thirteen."
"Hikaru, there are so many people. Aren't you afraid of getting lost?"
Hikaru laughed at that. His father works as one of the controller in JRailway company. He spent almost his entire childhood in train stations. As long as they exist he'll never get lost. As the saying goes, all train stations leads to Tokyo. But he had never been outside Tokyo prefecture before.
Hikaru noticed some people giving him the wide berth. He bend down his head low to hide his face. He just realized he'd been grinning like an idiot and talking to himself.
"Hikaru, do you think..."
"Hey Sai! Stop talking already! The people are giving me the look like I'm nuts and they could be right."
The voice or ghost stopped its chattering in his head and Hikaru for once was grateful for the blessed silence. It was silent like it used to and Hikaru almost forgot all about the ghost when he realized he's starting to feel like there's a hole in his gut. It's not physical pain but rather grief and his energy was being sucked right out from there. His heart seems to beat faster and he felt a sense of impending doom, which was crazy. He never felt like this in his life, it kinda scared him.
"Hey Sai! Stop it! Are you trying to kill me or something?" Hikaru didn't know whether to get mad or get scared. He already suspected that Sai is not evil or anything like that but his emotions hits Hikaru like a steamroller. Sai's passion was just too much for a thirteen year old kid.
"I don't know what you're talking about Hikaru. I'm not saying anything just as you wanted." Sai sounds subdued.
Hikaru realized he was acting like a punk, a rude one which he is but he never meant to hurt anyone. Knowing how Sai literally feels, he felt guilty on top of everything he's been feeling which aggravated him again.
"Look Sai, I'm not like you. I say whatever comes into my head without thinking. I don't mean to hurt your feelings or whatever but I'm kinda confused right now what to do with you and it comes out angry. Do you understand how I feel? You should, you're inside my head after all. Let me get used to you, OK?"
"I... I understand Hikaru. I'm so sorry, so sorry Hikaru." Sai in a voice so small it was pitiful.
"It's alright, you're alright Sai. I think it's not so bad being with you." Hikaru tried to cheer him up half-heartedly.
"You mean it, Hikaru? You think it's good with me as your companion?" Sai in a hopeful voice.
Hikaru felt himself getting out of his bad mood. Must be Sai, because he still felt like kicking its ass if it had any.
(End of Chapter1.)