My younger brother and I got very bored so he picked up a dictionary and told me to log on to the computer. Without explaining what he was doing he opened the book to a random page jabbed his finger on a word and said "Nic, you have ten minutes in which to write a Doctor Who fic containing the word 'whipped'." So this is what I came up with...

If it is popular more will be written as there are lots of words in the dictionary.

Disclaimer: It's mine all mine I tell you. MWHA HA HA HA HA!!! Actually it isn't, don't sue.

The one with the whipped cream

Jackie wrestled with her shopping bags as she searched for the key to her flat. Upon finding the key she shoved in the lock and as she turned it she could have sworn she could hear a muffled giggling coming from inside. Rose and the Doctor had turned up for supper so she assumed it was them.

She pushed open the door, "Oi! What're you two up to then?" She called.

The giggling stopped and there was a hurried rustling that Jackie couldn't quite place. Then the rustling too, stopped.

There was complete silence.

Jackie dumped the bags in the hall, going over to Rose's bedroom to investigate, "Rose what's going on?"

"Uh nothing mum."

The last Jackie had heard, nothing did not giggle, she opened the bedroom door. Rose was flopped on her bed, head in a magazine, a wide grin on her face. She looked up as Jackie entered.

"Hey mum."

"What're you reading?" She asked.

Rose smiled secretively before she shuffled round, her back to her mother, hiding the magazine from view.

"Rose?"

"Oh it's nothing mum, not even in English, the TARDIS is translating it for me."

"Wot you mean his ship thingy gets in side your head?"

Before Jackie got an answer to her question someone tapped her on the shoulder. She jumped with fright before spinning round to see who it was. It was the Doctor. She resisted slapping him. Instead she poked a finger in his chest and looked at him menacingly, "See here, I don't want you stickin' alien things in my daughter, you got that?" She threatened.

For some reason this made the Doctor snort with laughter.

"What's so funny!" She demanded.

The Doctor placed his hands on her shoulders, and looked at her solemnly, "My dear Jackie, you wouldn't understand." He let go of her shoulders and looked at Rose, "Coming?"

Rose jumped of her bed, throwing the magazine across the floor "Yep!"

"Oi, I thought you two were stayin' for dinner, I was about to make a big meal, with a desert and everthin'!"

"Oh we are staying, yum yum I love dinner and a desert too! Did you know the Morchanians of Morcham always have whipped cream for desert." Jackie could tell he was about to start rambling. "In fact it is a custom for the chief to have a nice long, hot bath. Eat some dinner, retire to his bedroom and eat whipped cream with Yogalberries for desert. Not as boring as it sounds as his room is full of beautiful women. Iron thighs those women have, or so I've been told, don't actually have any experience. Lots of things I am am experienced at though. Took Rose dancing the other night."

"He's a good dancer." Rose informed her.

"So don't you worry yourself Jackie, we'll definitely have dinner with you." He said cheerfully "But, Rose and I need to fix the Hydrogormic optilating extractor in the bathroom." He turned to Rose, grinning. "Don't we Rose."

"Yep." She confirmed, "The shower is just far too steamy these days. Not that I don't mind a steamy shower of course."

Jackie looked between her daughter and the Doctor, her suspicion growing. "And why do you both need to fix the Hydro- whatever it is?"

"Ah Jackie, well the thing is, though we are both very good with our hands, the job really requires two people to do it properly."

"Well how long is this gonna take?" She demanded, irritate that the two of them were messing up her dinner plans.

"Don't worry mum, we'll take a break for dinner."

With that the two of them practically ran out the front door leaving Jackie standing alone in Rose's room. Her eyes went to the magazine on the floor, she walked over to it, picked it up, if that girl was reading some sort of alien...

"What?" Her face screwed up in confusion.

It was a hair styling magazine, perfectly English and perfectly unfunny. Jackie stared at it as though she expected it to spring to life and announce it's name was Jarvis Cocker.

Confused she put the magazine on the bed, she would just ignore it.

After putting the chicken and vegetables in the oven Jackie went to her shopping bags that now sat in a heap on the kitchen table, she dug around until she found the Marks and Spencers chocolate pudding. Her idea of making a desert was buy it from the shops.

Now if she remembered correctly, which she was certain she did, there was a can of whipped cream sitting on the top shelf in the fridge. They would have some with the pudding she decided, seeing as the Doctor had been going on about it, among other nonsense. She placed the pudding on the worktop before going over to open the fridge.

The fridge contained a number of things: a carton of apple juice, two bottles of milk, fruit, veg, a couple of packets of pre-cooked food and a half eaten ham sandwich.

However there was no whipped cream in site.

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Chibi Nightmare