You don't know me, a naruto fanfic

Dark. Angsty. Violence. Blood. Swearing.

Don't own Naruto.

English is not my native language.

I'm losing my mind

and you just stare and stare

as my world falls

„You don't know me, Sakura."

These words you said to me have haunted me for a long time.

They are on my personal top ten list of words-that-have-hurt-me-the-most.

And you know what?

Almost every word on this list was once said by you.

First place: Thank you

To be honest: I don't even really know myself, why these were the most hurtful words in my entire life.

Actually, it should be you're annoying (but surprisingly, it's only fifth place) or you're weak (made it to fourth place after all) or some of these other nice things you said to me.

But first one is thank you.

It isn't an insult, but it's not a compliment either. However it's nicer than you're weak, that's true.

Maybe I hate these words so much, because I never understood, what you meant, when you said them to me, six years ago.

And probably will never understand.

Second place: „You don't know me, Sakura."

This time I knew very well, what you wanted to say.

„You fucking don't know me, Sakura."

On this day, we, Naruto and I, Sai and Kakashi, were on our god damn chase after you. And we found you. We knew, that you had killed your brother and we were full of hope, that you would come back, back with us.

How foolish we were. So damn stupid.

There you stood, thogether with your new, better team (how I hated that redhaired cow, who was standing by your side), in all your fucking glory, looking down on us, like you always do.

„I' m not coming back."

I remember those words perfectly (third place, member of my top three).

„Stop chasing after me."

Sharingan activated, sword blazing.

„Or else I'll kill you."

Of course, we tried to stop you.

Of course you showed us, that you were serious.

The fight didn't last long. In the end it was always the same:

Naruto would fight with Sasuke.

And lose.

It wasn't, that Sasuke was so much stronger than Naruto.

No, the difference was their heart:

Naruto couldn't bring himself to fight his best friend/rival seriously with a cold mind and an empty heart.

Well, Sasuke could.

That's why, when the battle ended, Naruto lay on the ground, bleeding and bruised.

Sasuke stood. With some tough injuries, but he stood.

Slowly he made his way to Naruto's unmoving body

In this moment I finally found the courage to stand up against him.

Kunai in my hand, standing in fighting pose, I was ready (well, so I thought...) to stop him.

„Don't be stupid, Sakura."

He looked at me with his cold eyes. (So cold, so cold, where is you heart? Where is your fucking heart?)

He didn't take me seriously. He didn't take me seriously.

Something inside me snapped. Full of rage I charged at him.

I don't remember the details of our fight, the only thing I will never forget was the end:

Panting and bleeding I crouched on the ground, watching my opponent with suspicious eyes. I had reached my limits.

Sasuke seemed to have almost reached his, too, but not quite.

(This was his second fight after all)

I looked around, saw the destruction, this fight had caused, saw my injured teammates, saw Naruto (my poor Naruto), saw you.

And I wanted to cry.

„Why are you like this?"

He seemed to be surprised at my sudden outburst.

„Answer me!"

Now I was really crying.

I saw his impassive face, deep into his icy eyes, into his empty soul and I realized:

„You aren't Sasuke."

No answer.

„The Sasuke-kun I know would never-"

„You don't know me, Sakura."

My eyes widened, my heart was hurting.

I looked into his face and I saw...anger?!

„You fucking don't know me."

His words pierced my heart, his sword pierced my body.

Everything became black.

And a part of my heart died.

I loved you, I loved you, I love you.

Later I would realize, that this was just the beginning. The beginning of the end.

Akatsuki destroyed Konoha. Fights everywhere. Blood everywhere. Death everywhere.

We didn't have any chance.

Kakashi died.

Tsunade, my beloved master, died.

My parents died.

My lovely mom.

My smart daddy.

Many people died.

Another part of my heart died.

And Naruto, my poor Naruto, was taken. Away. From. Me.

So I chased after him, since that seemed to be the only thing I could do.

Chasing, always chasing.

But I was too late.

There goes another part of my heart.

They already had ripped the Kyuubi out of his body, leaving him empty and broken.

Oh, he did not die. It was far worse.

He is only an empty shell of his former self, unmoving, unseeing, mute.

And I begged, oh how I begged, to have that pitiful rest of him. To keep him living (if you could call that living), because I am selfish, and I coldn't let him go, he was all I had left, my friend, my brother.

And I amused, oh, how I amused him.

I never thought, I could hate another person so much. He taught me wrong. But he is an Uchiha after all.

An Uchiha, just like you.

And as much as I despise him, I need him (sick, I am sick)

I have no place I could go.

No place would let me in.

They say pain has made me insane.

But it's not the pain, that made me this way (well, maybe a bit). Oh no..

It was power.

Because power makes you mad. Everybody with power is crazy. In order to gain strength you must become cruel, if you're cruel, you kill.

You kill people, friends, your heart, your soul.

And then become insane (nobody can stay sane, without a heart, without a soul).

Andhe made me kill many people.

He finds it funny, how my opponents are decieved by my seemingly innocent appereance.

Fools.

Finally, the last part of my heart is dead. I don't feel the pain anymore. I'm not Sakura anymore.

I. Am. Nothing.

I am on a mission.

The target, who posseses the desired scroll, is easily found.

I stand between the slaughted bodies (people I killed), blood on the floor, on the walls, on my cloak, my targets whimpering, begging, to my feet, as suddenly the door bursts open and a person, a shinobi, runs in.

I know this person. I search in my foggy, locked up memory and I find him.

It's this Suigetsu-guy, one of Sasuke's teammates.

After him, the huge man, I think his name is Juugo, then the redhaired bitch and at last Sasuke. They stop, as they see me, changing in fighting poses.

I watch them with slight interest. They seem to want my scroll.

Well, they are not going to get it.

And then, suddenly, I see how a look of recognation flashes over Sasuke's face.

His pretty, pretty face

„Sakura?"

I don't know, what I feel, as I see him now, my first love.

Maybe nothing?

Maybe something?

Love?

Hate?

Both?

I don't know.

I don't care.

Sasuke looks around, taking in the dead corpses on the floor, the crying target in my clutches, my cloak, my ring.

Yes, this is your brother's ring. Ironic, isn't it?

„This isn't like you."

Now, this makes me laugh. Almost.

„Really?"

I speak softly, yet loud enough for everybody to hear. Slowly I bring my hand down and snap my fingers around my target's neck.

And rip his head off.

I watch adorignly how his blood splahes on the already tainted walls. Then I turn around to look into their shoked, disgusted faces. My glance lingers on Sasuke.

Then I let my mouth curve in my oh so pretty, bright smile, I used to wear so often, back then.

„Well, you don't know me."

Because everybody has a darker side -

you only need to search...

Maybe I'll do a sequel, don't know yet.

Review?