Clouds
(A 300 Stelios/Astinos fanfiction, for Merrie, by Lissi)
Clouds drifted across a dull and depthless sky. The orange sunset looked flat, unreal. Smoke rising from the pyres stained it with black, the lives of the dead warriors floating away in dust and ash.
Stelios lowered his gaze from the sombre sight, glancing only briefly at the smouldering fires. With a barely audible sigh, he turned to the younger man next to him. "Come on. You want a drink?"
Astinos started out of distraction. This was the first time he had sent a comrade off to the shades. "…yeah."
The two young warriors turned away from the pyres, leaving them to be watched over by the remaining band of silent, cloaked, vigilant men.
---
"Here." Stelios passed Astinos a cup of unwatered wine, raising his own in his free hand. "To a beautiful death." He downed half the cup in a mouthful, taking pleasure in the prickling warmth of the wine on the inside of his throat.
Astinos echoed his words, emptying his own cup and holding it out to be refilled. "More?"
Stelios raised an eyebrow, but refilled it without a word, topping up his own wine while he was at it. They drank in silence, in memory, each in his own thoughts, until their cups were empty again. Leaning across to refill Astinos', Stelios paused at the preoccupied look on his face. "What is it?" he asked.
"…They were too young to die." Astinos' dark fringe fell across his face, obscuring his eyes. "Demaratus was in the agoge with me, and Agis was your age – it could've been one of us. Next time it might be."
That was true, and Stelios felt slightly uncomfortable about it, but he did his best to make a light-hearted reply. "What else did you expect? It'll happen to us all some day, might as well enjoy life while we can." He took a swig of wine, this time directly from the neck of the amphora, the large jar unwieldy but easier to lift for being half-empty.
"... I don't want to die."
Astinos glanced across at Stelios, blushed at his somewhat disapproving expression, and continued before he could say anything. "It would be an honour to die serving Sparta, of course. But I – I can't die yet. I haven't lived."
Stelios could tell Astinos was getting to the heart of the matter by the tormented look in his eyes. He frowned, feeling rather awkward. "What do you mean? I'm not sure there's much more to life than this."
"You can't talk! At least you're married, you have a son – that's more than me, I – I've never even been with a woman." Astinos blushed crimson as he realised what he'd just admitted to.
But Stelios wasn't surprised. "No?" he asked rhetorically. While his wife hadn't been the first woman he'd slept with, his previous experience had consisted of hurried illicit fumblings with prostitutes. Women were in short supply in the society of young warriors. In a community full of frustrated young men, the atmosphere was heavy with pent up sexual tension, and many – himself included – had yielded to temptation and taken a male lover. He knew Astinos well enough to know that he was not one of them.
Astinos sipped from his cup of wine, avoiding looking at Stelios. The older warrior refilled his own cup, sipping thoughtfully. He glanced sidelong at Astinos, who looked thoroughly miserable. Stelios sighed, running a hand through his blond hair. "You want to try?" he said at last.
Astinos looked up, confused. "What?"
"You know, sex."
"Uhh… what do y'think, Stelios?" A hint of a smile found its way onto Astinos' face.
"…does it matter if it's a woman?" The blond looked at him through half closed eyes. Astinos blinked, realisation dawning in his eyes followed immediately by confusion. Stelios grinned. "Say no if you don't want to," he said quietly. He put down his cup and shifted closer to the younger man. Astinos was frozen, watching him with wide dark eyes, but he didn't say anything. Stelios traced the curve of his arm with a hand, not touching the smooth tanned skin. He paused with his hand at Astinos' waist, and then in one fluid movement pulled him close and kissed him firmly.
He drew back to find Astinos still staring at him from those eyes. Surprise suited him. Stelios smiled. "Well?" he asked. "I'm not a woman, but I don't mind if you don't."
He didn't answer, just sat there, eyes wide. Stelios wasn't sure if it was just his hopeful mind – that kiss had been electric – seeing curiosity in the younger man's expression. He had a feeling he wasn't going to get an answer, in any case, so he leaned forward and kissed him again.
He had never expected it to feel this good. When Astinos tentatively put a hand on his shoulder and began to return the kiss, tongue lightly teasing its way out from between his lips, the shiver that ran through him was enough to melt all his self-control. He pushed Astinos down onto his discarded cloak, lying chest-to-chest and thigh-to-thigh on top of him, tongue in his mouth, the kiss deepened by urgency. He was surprised at the eagerness with which Astinos responded, the impatient way his hands clutched at his body. The younger man's hands tangled in his hair, pulling him in.
Stelios could feel Astinos getting hard, pressing against his thigh through the thin leather that was all either of them wore. He grinned, shifting position and making Astinos arch up towards him, a soft gasp escaping his lips.
Stelios pulled away, running a hand down Astinos' chest, stopping at his waist. Astinos squirmed as Stelios slid his hand under his waistband. Stelios could feel the younger man's quick, shallow breaths on his face, growing more irregular as he teased him by edging closer and closer, culminating in a sharp gasp when his fingers found their goal. He looked down into wide eyes clouded by desire, and smiled.
Abruptly Astinos was naked, what little covering he'd had torn away by the older warrior's eager hands, and Stelios was moving down his body, tracking his chest with kisses, sucking a nipple, trailing his tongue across taut tanned skin, mouthing impatience along his hip-bone – and Astinos moaned aloud, eyes widening at the new and wonderful sensation.
When Stelios pulled away, Astinos struggled to sit up, wanting to tell him to carry on. Looking into playful blue eyes, breathless, his voice sounded husky when he finally dragged words from his hazy mind. "Stelios – what… you, I…"
The blond warrior placed a finger against his lips to silence him. "I'll show you." Astinos nodded, relieved. Stelios' hand stroked across his cheek and down his neck, looping lazily around his shoulder as he drew him in. Astinos' response to his kiss was insistent, demanding. He pushed Stelios impatiently backwards.
Stelios let out a cry of surprise as he hit the floor, a soft laugh as the younger warrior removed his clothing. He pulled Astinos down on top of him, stopping him in his tracks with a fierce kiss. Naked bodies pressed together, breathing hard, the two men looked at each other. "Well?" Astinos asked quietly. "Go on."
Stelios smiled at his friend's newfound confidence, raising himself up on one elbow to look around. Astinos sat up, kneeling over his thighs and watching as he stretched to reach a small amphora, opened it and poured out a little of the oil into the palm of his hand. "Here," the blond warrior murmured, and took Astinos' hand in his, coating his fingers in oil and guiding him to do what was necessary. He edged backwards, spreading his legs and lifting his hips.
Stelios gasped as a questing finger found its way inside him, followed by another probing deeper. Astinos' expression was curious, half-dazed, wondering at his own boldness. Stelios found it beautiful. A wave of pleasure ran through him as Astinos fingers brushed a sensitive spot, and he cried out, arching towards him.
Astinos withdrew, and Stelios looked up at him with bright blue eyes darkened by desire. "Take me. Now. Go on."
A flicker of hesitation showed in Astinos' eyes, only for a second. He moved forward, guided again by Stelios, and the blond moaned in mingled pain of entry and pleasure at the look on Astinos' face. He let himself be drawn into a rhythm, one hand working his own cock in time with the younger man's inexpert thrusting. The other hand gripped Astinos' waist as he arched towards him, muscles tensing, making the younger man gasp. His gaze never left Astinos' face, and his name escaped his lips in a gasp of pleasure as he thrust harder, deeper.
Astinos came with a moan and a look of revelation in his dark eyes. His hand slid down to join Stelios', taking over from him, stroking lazily until Stelios jerked and gasped and came, crying out loud enough to be heard outside the storeroom. Astinos silenced him with a kiss, then rolled away to leave him breathing in gasps, mind fogged in the aftermath of pleasure.
Gradually Stelios' breathing slowed, and he laughed softly. "Well?" he said after a pause. "Worth me not being a woman?"
Astinos grinned, leaning on one elbow and looking down at him. "Yeah. You were a pretty good substitute."
Stelios smirked. "Thanks. You're not so bad yourself, for a beginner." He laughed as Astinos glared at him, and poked him in the chest. Looking up through half-closed eyes, his face grew momentarily more serious, though his tone was light-hearted. "So now you're all ready to die?"
Astinos shook his head, grinning. "And miss out on more of that? No way."
"You're obsessed already!" Stelios grinned back and pushed his friend so he fell back onto the floor. The younger man looked sideways at him, and unexpectedly yawned. Stelios rolled his eyes. "Go to sleep. Lightweight." He rolled over, pulling a cloak around himself. Head pillowed on his arm, eyes closed, he tried to still the uneasy feeling that he'd got more than he'd bargained for when he'd suggested this.
---
The light-bringer rose in a dark sky, heralding the arrival of golden dawn from her husband's bed. The horizon began to glimmer with saffron, orange, crimson, and painted the clouds with the colours of love and desire.
The two young men slept on, wrapped in red cloaks in a secluded storeroom, the evidence of the night before plain to anyone who would care to look. But only the sun saw them, a burning disc into the morning sky, its rays streaming through the narrow window and falling on their faces. The blond one awoke, sat up, and smiled at his still sleeping companion, a trace of genuine affection mixed in with his amusement.
The chariot of Helios rose into the clouds and continued in its eternal journey, leaving behind those two friends and lovers, unaware of the fate that awaited them, unaware of the future but content with the present.