Crazy Eyes looked over her copy of "Twelfth Night, as she lay on her bunk in the cubicle at Litchfield Correctional. Was that Dandelion coming her way? Crazy looked down at
"Most villanously; like a pedant that keeps a school
i' the church. I have dogged him, like his
murderer. He does obey every point of the letter
that I dropped to betray him"
Shee-it. The Bard would have plenty of betrayal if he'd seen a week or two at a women's prison. Unwillingly, Crazy moved her head up slightly, and took another look at Chapman. Looked like the girl was coming her way.
"Suzanne, you can make friends with McKenzie and Graceanne if you just try a bit harder." Mummy and Grammy would say. They didn't believe that Suzanne's contemporaries at Rye Country Day School could be racist. Little blonde girls just like grown up Piper Chapman…Crazy had been trying to make friends with them her whole life!
Mother and Dad had always stressed to Crazy that she was a "chosen child" that her skin color was just a beautiful thing about her, and if the love in her heart was expanded, she'd be embraced by everyone. And of course Crazy didn't remember anything about a life before Mother and Dad and Grammy—she'd been adopted when she was three weeks old!
And just like Piper Chapman, the little girls at Rye Country Day had pushed Suzanne back—called her Horseface—they wouldn't dare use the "N" word, but it was clear enough.
And Crazy had returned the favor by Saran wrapping the toilet seats, so little Whitney Hastings ruined her pretty plaid skirt from the Talbots. She'd dropped a firecracker in Madame Bouvoier's antique vase at the dancing school after noting the old Frenchwoman's nose scrunch up at Suzanne's nappy hair one too many times.
It was probably over-sensitivity that forced the matter when Suzanne had killed and bagged her riding instructor the summer before she was supposed to start at Wellesly, just because he had started calling her "Winfrey" for Oprah Winfrey. And it had spread, the nickname…all through the stables, and at sailing lessons.
Putting a bagged person into a wood-chipper looked so much easier on CSI. But what were you going to do? Grammy used her influence with the Attorney General, who had been her first BF after her deb party in 1972, to ensure that Suzanne be sent to low security Litchfield. And Suzanne had promised, so earnestly, to avoid trouble.
And here was Piper Chapman, who Crazy had written off after Chapman's fiancée had said all that nasty shit on the radio show, approaching the cubicle. Dandelion had quit her fiancée, and had been dumped by Alex, her old smuggling lesbo buddy…here in prison.
Well, whatever Chapman wanted now, Crazy Eyes was going to tell her to get the fuck out of her face! She'd tried to make Chapman her "wife" in the beginning, but that little ungrateful bitch could just…
"Suzanne?" Piper smiled at Crazy, her eyelashes fluttering.
Fuck you, Blondie, Crazy thought. I bet your SATs were a lot lower than mine.
"O cruell causer of undeserved chaunge.
By greet desire unconstantly to raunge :
Is this your waye for prouf of stedfastnes ?"
"Cra—Suzanne, how are you? I just got out of SHU for the Pensatuckey incident."
"Congratulations on that, Chapman." You manipulative bitch. "Learning to kick some ass, are you?" Crazy leaned back on her bunk, trying to look bored.
"Yeah." Piper blushed. "I wish it hadn't had to go that way. But what could I do?"
Hesitantly, Chapman sat down on the bunk next to Crazy Eyes. Crazy knew that Chapman was seductively trying to play her. If Alex snapped her fingers, Crazy would be history. But here Chapman was, trailing her fingers on Crazy's thigh.
Tell her to get the fuck out your cubicle. Have some self respect!
She's leaning forward, murmuring about loneliness. Goddamnit! Slap her!
As Crazy Eyes met Chapman's lips with her own, plunging her long tongue down the white girl's throat, she cursed herself for the weakness…