Save Those Words, a south of nowhere fanfic

One-shot, song fic.

Song used is Save Those Words by Lil Eddie

Disclaimer: I only own my imagination, sadly nothing else

I'm dedicating this to all those wonderful people who regularly review my work, it means so very much. You all know who you are so this is my way of saying thank you and of letting you know it's deeply appreciated

Save Those Words

I wish I knew how it came to this. I wish I knew the exact moment that set all of this in motion so that I could go back and fix things, make them right. I wish I knew the precise second that changed the world as I knew it and led to me to be standing here right now.

Where is here, I hear you ask? Here is outside a beautiful old church letting the colours of the stained glass windows bathe me in all the hues of the rainbow while I prepare for what I am about to do. Here is taking a deep breath before I take action that could change my life as I know it forever. One way or another it will. The next few minutes will decide if I get to live or merely exist for the rest of the time I am on this earth.

I push open the heavy wooden silently doors and step into the shadows so that I can watch her undetected by a church full of people who would probably try and stop what I am about to do. She looks like a goddess. Her long blonde hair is up off her kissable neck with a few loose tendrils framing her beautiful face. Her dress is simple and elegant, it is perfect for her. Her smile is huge, but her eyes are haunted and unsure, lacking the excitement you'd expect to see in a bride on her wedding day, or at least I hope they are.

You look beautiful in white
Standing there in front of your friends and all your family
And the man beside you 'bout to say 'I do'
God wish that man was me
Yeah...

I step out of the shadows and start making my way along the hard wood floor, that is covered in rose petals, towards the alter where my soulmate is standing about to make a mistake that will destroy both our lives forever.

I can't keep silent any longer... Nooo
I gotta speak now or forever hold my peace
I only got few short seconds to make you change your mind
So baby listen to my plea

As I make my way down the aisle all eyes turn to me and the whispers start. I saw her mother shooting daggers at me as her father forcibly held his wife in her seat in the front row. He had always supported my relationship with his daughter and I could see the approval in his eyes. He knew what I had always known, that happiness could never fully exist for me and her unless we were together. Finally the pair of eyes I most wanted on me caught mine in a fiery gaze full of so many conflicting emotions it almost shattered my cracked and damaged heart. I locked my chocolate eyes on her ocean blue ones and started to speak…

If you say those words, then you don't love me
If you tell him you do, then I'll just turn around and leave
But you still haven't said it
And I'm here not to let it
I crashed, uninvited call me crazy

If you say those words, then I'll just throw up my hands
If you go through with it, then he's the better man
But you still haven't said it
And I'm here not to let it
My baby I'm beggin' please... Save those words for me

Tears spilled down both our cheeks unchecked at my admission, at my plea. Her eyes flicked to the man standing beside her and then back to me. The pain and longing in her eyes so plain for all to see.

I remember when I had heard about her pending nuptials when my sister had let it slip, I wasn't going to do anything. I just figured I had lost her once and for all and then the night before her wedding I saw her parked in her car outside my house. Her big blue eyes locked on mine and spoke of the depths of her confusion. It was then that I knew there was a hope, a tiny chance, that she still loved me just as much as I loved her. I knew I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't take this chance to make things right between us.

I finally came around to my senses
I've drove all night and here I am right now
With all these angry faces staring
At this desperate look I'm wearing
Calling out your name and interrupting vows

The church is deathly silent, not a sound can be heard and the tension in the air is palpable. I stare at her and plead desperately with my eyes, begging her to make the choice that will give us both a chance at a love we could never deny. Even when we were 'just friends' we were never just friends. It was always more intimate than that. So there I stood begging her with my eyes in the silent communication that only we can understand.

If you say those words, then you don't love me
If you tell him you do, then I'll just turn around and leave
But you still haven't said it
And I'm here not to let it
I crashed, uninvited call me crazy

I take a step closer to the alter, to her, oblivious to the stares and glares of the assembled people. To me there is no one else in the room but her. The rest of the world has ceased to exist, all that matters is the woman in front of me who is holding my heart and my future in her delicate, yet strong hands.

'Till I hear I from your lips
See you seal it with a kiss
I'm not buying it

I'm not buying it

I smile at her, the fear and hope both evident on my face. I can't walk away from this, from her until I hear her tell me absolutely that there is nothing between us anymore, that she doesn't love me and that she wants to spend her life with the man staring numbly from the alter. He isn't even fighting for her, it looks like he has already accepted defeat. I would fight for her to the ends of the earth and back. She deserves someone who is passionate enough to fight tooth and nail with everything they have for her.

I hold her gaze, noting her erratic breathing and tear streaked cheeks and softly say the words once again, leaving myself more open and vulnerable than I ever have been in my entire existence. It's terrifying, but anything less is short changing the moment and what it means for me, for us.

If you say those words, then you don't love me
If you tell him you do, then I'll just turn around and leave
But you still haven't said it
And I'm here not to let it
I crashed, uninvited call me crazy

She takes a step down off the alter and turns back to the man she had promised her love to. She smiled sadly and whispers, "I'm sorry. My heart has always belonged to her, it was never mine to give,"

The guy smiled kindly, but sadly and murmured, "This is what happens when met with an unstoppable force, it's time I stepped out of the way and let things be as they are meant to be. I wish you love and happiness and I have a feeling you will only find that with her." The guy stepped forward and kissed her gently on the forehead before tears started to spill down his cheeks and he strode quickly from the church.

My blonde beauty turned back to face me and stepped forward, closing the distance between us and taking my face in her hands. I felt tears of happiness spill down my cheeks as she leaned in and tenderly kissed my lips. She pulled back and fixed watery blue eyes on my swimming brown ones, "This is it Ashley, this is real. If we do this we go all in, we don't mess this up again."

I nodded and swallowed around the lump in my throat, "I'm done messing this up Spencer. I love you more than I ever thought I would be capable of loving anyone. If you are going to say 'I do' I want it to be me."

Spencer threw back her head and laughed, "How about we start with coffee and see how we go?"

I grinned and nodded, taking her hand in mine and running out of the church amid yells from her mother for us to come back and clapping and cheers from our mutual friends and her brother and father.

Once we were outside I pulled her into my arms, where she fit so perfectly, and kissed her like I had been dreaming of doing since we parted. I crushed her body against mine and wrapped my hands around her torso to hold her close. Spencer tangled her fingers in my curls and molded herself to me as our lips danced together. It was heaven. It felt like coming home and yet it was also a beginning, our new beginning of forever.

Save those words for me…