ME AND THE AKATSUKI IN .. WALMART :O
catlizard is officially BORED
Caitlyn: Well I found this huge list of 101 things to do in walmart.. but what if I do this with.. THE AKATSUKI!?!?! Make that 102 because I am adding on 1 later xD
This is 1-10 :)
I sigh angrily, being cousin's with Itachi was horrible, but his plan for summer was something I always wanted to do. So I agreed to get kicked out of every walmart in the county with him and his "Gang". Goody!
I sigh as I walk into the store looking at the list. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.. hmm easy enough.
I get paired out with Tobi, for the rest of this, the other were doing other jobs to distract and film our doings. We pull the carts out of the 4 slots and I place them all over the womens beauty department, the clothes, and the health department.
"WOO!" I yell as I sail the last cart into the medicine section. I heard a few screams and giggled gleefully.
"TOBI DIDN'T MEAN TO PRETTY LADY" yelled Tobi running across the store away from a old women who he had obviously hit with a cart.
"Uh.. Ma'am" I yell standing in front of her and Tobi " Sorry I didn't mean to loose track of him! I was just looking at what to buy and my retarded brother slipped away from me!" I said sternly glaring daggers at him. Which was true, but he wasn't really retarded he was just.. putting up a act.
She nods sympathetically and walks away. I sweat drop and scold Tobi for his dumbness. He growls and just hits me over the head. I roll my eyes and take out the list again... Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.. I squealed with my brother as we ran all the way over to the kids section.
I grabbed a little Barbie pink car and started Driving it all the way to the front of the store. Tobi had trouble fitting in one so he just rode on the back of a little kids car with Deidara driving it. Did I mention it was JOHN DEER :O I wonder what he looked like anyway, hope it was hot!
I started driving around the front of the store and the employees just stare at us like we are idiots. I ram over a fat lady giving out Smiley Stickers to little kids, which scares the little kids away. The lady clearly has a broken nose and I just slowly back away like nothing happened. Deidara of course explodes a cashier's shoes with acid. Had no idea where the hell he got that but I just laughed. I didn't even look where I was going because I hit the manager who was glaring at me. I tried to run him over but it didn't work.. wait was he liked 7 feet tall or something?!?
I feel someone pick me up by the top of my shirt and throw me outside the building. Here comes Deidara and Tobi sailing right out the door.
I laugh my ass off at Deidara's remark. He hit Tobi over the head and growled at him for being a stupid ass.
"Deidara." I say and he looks at me " YOU'RE MY NEW BEST FRIEND!" I scream and hug him. He was definitely shocked to being hugged by me, and best of all Tobi kicked Deidara off me :D
We made our way over to another Walmart a street down from the way there I was assigned my new Hell partner, Hidan! My brother was to pissed off at Deidara to go. Can't believe he was that protective. -.-"
When me and Hidan walked in the store, the others followed close behind and appeared to be "Shopping".
"Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day... COOL!" I yelled, excitedly. Hidan cussed so I wasn't going to put that at ALL! I flipped him off and we headed off to the alarm clock section. I set them all at every 10 minutes. Hidan just made sure no one walked in on me. When I was done I smiled proudly and just went on to the next one. We would know what we had accomplished in a little bit.
I read the next one aloud too. "Start playing football; see how many people you can get to join in, Hidan I have no effin idea how to play this so YOU are going to be the leader of this" I thrusted a football from the sports section at him. " I'll join in ,in a minute." To my surprise he didn't do anything about it, just winked at me, which I could literally hear my brother going nuts a few aisles down. I sigh and as he is yelling if anyone wants to play football , I join in and a guy and his little girl do too.
I trip over my own feet a few times, get caught by Hidan, Throw the ball into the wall and WHAM all the alarm clocks in the store go DING DONG DING DONG on full volume. I laugh my ass off as the little girl clings to Hidan's leg telling him that she loves him (AWW MOMENT) but it is short lived when Hidan kicks the little girl into her dads arm and puts his arm around my waist, which I didn't agree on and says "Sorry already got a girl I love" and walks away with my me kicking him in the balls.
I stop by the main door and stare at the next one GAPING! Hidan looks at it and Snickers and looks at the Hidden Camera in Pein's Hair. "Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him "I need some tampons!!"" I hear everyone laughing there asses as I growl at them. I twitch, and Yell " does that mean I have to bleed -.-"!?!?!" everyone sweat drops. "Well that is up to you.." Hidan snickers evilly. "Okay thank GOD" I hear Hidan yell JASHIN! When I'm walking to the rest room casually.
A few minutes later a male employee walks by and I jump behind him while squeezing my legs together and wham..
" I NEED SOME F_____ TANMPONS!" I scream at the top of lungs setting the guy spiraling into the poor floor. Looking at me Mouth Agape.
"Are you gonna sit there and watch me BLEED ALL OVER THE DAMN TILE OR ARE YOU GONNA GET ME A TAMPON!" I scream again hearing a thud, must be the guys trying not to laugh.
He suddenly stands up goes over to the intercom, and says "Aisle 25, Women needs Tampon, Security." And smirks at me. I scream and grab the intercom "JUST GET ME A TAMPON!" A few minutes later a lady walks up to me and gives me a box of tampon, sports flex. I smile and squeal my thanks and hop off to the rest room. I casually put my "Gift from Heaven" into mu purse and wait about 5 minutes. I walk out to see everyone smirking.
"A girl has to do what a girl has to do." I smile happily. And everyone looks at me like I'm nuts and I hear Someone say, Damn did she over do it..
"I over did what? A girl who needs one needs one right Konan" I smirk as I hand her the "Gift from Heaven" and her face goes 10 shades of scarlet, which by the way did not go good with her. I sigh as I look at the next one, my partner in crime will be.. KONAN!
"Konan dear come here" I show her the list and she nods. I grab Kisame, and Zetsu too. "Okay" I look at Pein's hair again and .. "Try on Bra's and walk around the sewing and fabric department and see what happens, probably for people who do not wish to get arrested." I smile. "That is where you come in boys." I grab Zetsu's hand and drags him all the way, he got glares from all the guys with that. Kisame just follows. We get to the bra department, time for some LACE.
I pull out a hot pink lace and throw it at Zetsu. He gapes and gulps at me. I see him go over to the Changing room, and so does Kisame. Me and Konan giggle evilly until..
"HOW THE F___ DO YOU PUT THIS THING ON" which came from both directions. I sighed as I walked into Zetsu's stall because Konan refuses to do either.
"DAMN ZETSU YOU'RE BUILT :O!" I scream and start poking him and his abs are as hard as STONE! I start trying to hook the bra up and it works perfectly. I jump out and I get a jealous look from Konan.
"Come on you can go feel, those things are as hard as STONE.." I smirk at her and she happily skips on into Zetsu's stall. I walk over to Kisame and stare at what Konan has picked out for him. A green froggie bra. As Kisame takes off his shirt I gasp. He is more built the ZETSU. Damn... I hook up the bra to him and I smirk. This was going to be hilarious. I walk out and open the door to Zetsu stall, and Konan is on a full out make out. I SCREAM and..
"MY VIRGIN EYES" I scream ever so loudly Tobi comes over here and literally puts his hands over my eyes while I'm having a panic attack.
After the incident, Pein and Konan break up :( Poor Konan just couldn't resist Zetsu's hotness could she. Anyway time to put my plan into action. I drag Kisame and Zetsu through the Aisles, put them in the middle of I hear people screaming nudist at the top of their lungs, I grab Zetsu and and Kisame and put their shirts back on and throw them in my HUGE camping bag. I have the guys drag us out of the door and I open it up with they are in the back of the car.
I start laughing so hard, Hidan "bumps" Into me and kisses me on the lips. Hehe Tobi tried to smother him and screams " WHY MUST YOU BE SO DAMN HOT ROOREN?!" he yells angrily and throws me in the front seat with Pein. We drive another block around and here comes the.. SUPER WALMART. I squeal at the next one, this one I could definitely do. When we get there Tobi walks by me to make sure no one makes another move on me. I push him off and grab Konan, she will be my partner in crime again. I look at Pein's hair and say.. "Try On Bras over the top of you're clothes!" I hear them all laughing silently as I make my way over to the "Bra Department in bright Yellow Letters, with Konan of course!
I smile happily as I grab a bright yellow bra, to go over my black shirt and pay for it. I go into the changing stall and put the bra over my outfit. Thank you JASHIN it was not padded. I looked to see Konan with a Bright Pink bra with her Dark blue Shirt. Heh goes with her I guess. I run out happily and see people staring at me.
"Naw you people just don't no hotness when you see it" I smile at them and waltz over to Konans stall.
"Come on we need to complete this by the end of the summer if you dont mind." I bang on the door and it swings open to see, Konan with the bra on huddling in a corner looking at a damn Tarantula.
"RUN FOR YOU'RE LIVES THE PET ZOO LET OUT A BOMB!" I scream and grab Konan and we run for our Lives while everyone is rushing out the doors thinking what I said was true. I twitch as we calmly walk out to the car where the guys are waiting for us. We head down about 5 blocks into another Walmart.
My partner in crime for this is.. :O Sasori! I let him read the note thing and I face Pein's Hair again. " Make a Trail of Orange Juice on the ground to.. the man's rest room :)" I smile at him ruffling his hair, DAMN HIS HAIR WAS SOFT. I hand him his orange juice, not really wanting to take away my hand and he does his thing. He pours the orange juice over the ground and into the mens rest room. He walks out as calmly as he went in.
A few minutes later over the intercom it says.. "Clean up from Front of store to Man's Rest rooms on the west side! Trail of GIFTS!" says a girls voice giggling over the intercom. I smirk as I look at the next one, oh DAMNNN this was gonna be good. I grab Itachi, and I whisper in his ear and his eyes go wide.
I smile at the Camera "While walking around the store, sing in you're loudest voice possible, Sex, and CANDY!" I smirk as Hidan starts laughing his ass off and puts his arm around me again, not a wise choice when my over protective brother was right by you.
Me and Itachi calmly walk up to the front of the store.
Btw my singing is Underlined and Bold. His is Bold and ITALITCS!
I cough a little bit getting everyone's attention.
Hangin' round downtown by myself
And I had so much time
To sit and think about myself
And then there she was
Like double cherry pie
Yeah there she was
Like disco superfly
I smell sex and candy here
Who's that lounging in my chair
Who's that casting devious stares
In my direction
Mama this surely is a dream
I see everyone looking at me terrified and slowly covering the kids ears.
Hangin' round downtown by myself
And I had too much caffeine
And I was thinkin' 'bout myself
And then there she was
In platform double suede
Yeah there she was
Like disco lemonade
I smell sex and candy here
Who's that lounging in my chair
Who's that casting devious stares
In my direction
Mama this surely is a dream
Mama this surely is a dream
I smell sex and candy here
Who's that lounging in my chair
Who's that casting devious stares
In my direction
Mama this surely is a dream
Mama this surely is a dream
Yeah mama this must be my dream
We sang this 5 times around the store, and we got kicked out right on the last verse, it sucked though because Itachi was finally LAUGHING! Damn how long did that take to get out of him, hell was I to even know.
We head over to the next one right down the block. I smirk as I walk into the next store. I look at the camera and say " Walk up to a random employee and tell him in a official tone, We got a code red in housewares, and see what happens" I don't hear any laughing yet.
I walk over to a employee and sure enough as I tell him that they have a Code red, He runs over with a Medical kit, bandages and has the Police on phone, the SWAT team comes out of no where, and explodes the entire store. I gape at this.
"Tobi." I say and he looks at my flabbergasted "Remind me to dye my hair!" I yell as we run out of the store laughing, I look at this store and smile, thus begins my royal summer getting kicked out of every walmart in the county :)
END OF CHAPTER ONE :O
Caitlyn: Damn I had a lot of fun writing this story! I surely did. Ill post the next one when I can, Hope I get a review :)