SMOTHER ME

Summary: It's time for Neil's birthday. Todd gives him something very special. What could of happened …ToddxNeil
Please R&R. Story is set right after Neil finds out about the play.

Disclaimer: Neither song nor the caracters are mine. Song is Smother Me by The Used.

Rating: K+

Special thanks: To Masha, who wrote this story on her computer (she types faster than me) and to Mia, our beta.

Neil never liked his birthdays. It was very unusual for a boy his age. He never liked getting free things. His friends knew that, so they never gave him anything. He still had to suffer an hour a year of his many relatives giving him sweaters and socks he will never use and then saying insincere 'thank you's and telling them how 'marvelous' presents they got him and how will he 'realy' going to need them. But nobody ever told Todd.

He was very surprised when Neil's birthday came and none of the others gave him anything. He decided that he'll give him his present later in their room.

One month ago he figured out that Neil's birthday is coming soon. He took one of his empty notebooks and started to write. He wrote everything. He wrote poems, short stories, ballads, lyrics, … It was very beautiful.

Back to present: Neil and Todd were alone in their beds. It was little after bed-check when Todd whispered quietly:

»Ba – Neil … You awake?«

Neil sat up and said:

»Yeah … What's up, Todd?«

Todd stood up and answered:

»Happy birthday, Neil,« and gave him his present. Neil sighed and asked Todd:

»Didn't anyone tell you I hate birthday presents?«

Todd's smile quickly vanished as he said:

»No, sorry. I can take it back if you want …«

Neil discovered some sorrow in his voice, so he quickly reacted:

»Oh, no, no, no! Just so you know for the next year,« and smiled. Todd's smile quickly found its way back on his lips, when he saw Neil's happiness as he opened his present. Neil opened the notebook and found Todd's dedication written in caligraphy on the first page. It said:

To my best friend in the whole world for his birthday.

Suck out all the marrow of life!

Todd Anderson

Neil was touched. He turned to say Todd his, this time sincere, thank you. But from the looks of it Todd was already asleep. He opened his new book again and started to read, but stopped, when he saw an envelope in the middle of the book. He took it in his hands and slowly opened it. He took the letter out and started to read.

Dear Neil!

Happy birthday again. I wrote this book to you, because like I said once before, I'm not like you. You say things and people listen. I'm not like that. But I finally figured away that I can tell everything yet say nothing. I started to write. This poems you will now read are meant for everyone. Everyone can read them and understand them differently. But this one, this lyrics, are just for you. Uhhh …Here goes nothing:

Smother Me

Let me be the one who calls you
baby all the time
Surely you can take some comfort
knowing that you're mine
Just hold me tight, lay by my side
Let me be the one who calls you
baby all the time

I found my place in the world
Could stare at your face for the rest of
my days
Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and Smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
Would you smother me?

Let me be the one who never leaves you all alone
I hold my breath and lose the feeling that I'm on my own
Hold me too tight, stay by my side
And let me be the one who calls you
baby all the time

I found my place in the world
Could stare at your face for the rest of
my days
Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
Would you smother me?
Smother me (Smother me)
Smother me (Smother me)
Smother me (Smother me)

When I'm alone time goes so slow
I need you here with me
And how my mistakes have made
your heart break
Still I need you here with me
So baby I, baby I'm here

Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
Would you smother me?

Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
Would you smother me?
Smother me (Smother me)
Smother me (Smother me)

Let me be the one who calls you
baby all the time
Let me be the one who calls you
baby all the time
Let me be the one who calls you
baby
The one who calls you
baby

I hope this song explains 'Ba – Neil' incedent before.

I hope you understand.

I hope we could still be friends.

Love,

Todd

Neil took a deep breath and roll over on his back. He never thought of Todd in that way, but Todd always seemed more attached to him. He kinda liked it. It was like having a younger brother to protect and teach. More and more he thought about it, there indeed was something more than just friendship between them. He thought about it for a bit and then jumped right up. He stepped on his bed and from this perspective he saw, that Todd wasn't asleep at all, he was just pretending. 'Mr Keating was right,' Neil thought. 'Everything does look different from this perspective.'

He went toward Todd's bed and sat on the corner. He softly said:

»I let you.«

Neil started to like his birthdays after all, as Todd's lips slowly curled into a smile.