Beneath Their Masks
Zero stepped forward, instantly drawing all eyes to him.
"Prince Schneizel," he began, his voice coming out simultaneously sweet and venomous from behind his mask, "would you care for a game of chess?"
Where lesser men might be intimidated, the Britannian prime minister smiled in amusement.
"Chess?"
"If I win, I'd like to have Sir Kururugi. Or rather, I want the Knight of Seven."
Before the prince could respond Suzaku growled.
"Now, wait! You can't just-!"
"I understand," Schneizel interrupted. "A Knight is not so without his knightmare. And a knightmare is not so without its crew. I'll agree to your terms. Is that alright with you, Sir Kururugi?"
"I..." Suzaku hesitated, unsure what to say. He was a Knight of the Round, working directly for Emperor Charles himself, so his employment couldn't actually be bartered away by the prince. But Schneizel was also undefeated at chess. And if he felt certain enough to accept Zero's proposal, then... "Yes. I'll agree to it."
Standing safely aside with the other guests and watching the exchange, CĂ©cile gasped.
"Lloyd, does that mean we have to join the Black Knights if Zero wins?"
Lloyd only shrugged and whispered back, trying not to draw any attention from the masked man who was Britannia's single greatest threat in the world.
"We're on Suzaku's payroll now, aren't we? If he goes, I don't think we get a choice. Nevertheless..."
"However," Schneizel continued to Zero, unaware of the two engineers' banter, "if you lose I want you to remove your mask and show your face."
Zero didn't answer right away. He stood still, arms wrapped beneath his cape and his expressionless, mirrored helm facing forward. For the shortest of moments it almost seemed he was reconsidering his proposal, but to actually believe it would be the height of naiveté. Zero never backed down, and when the odds were against him he would raise the stakes. And above all, Zero always defied every expectation.
"Unfortunately, I cannot agree to your terms. After all, merely showing my face would not be sufficient. To truly know Zero, you must know exactly what caused him to exist in the first place. If you should win, Prince Schneizel, I will reveal everything to you - and you alone - and leave it to your discretion how to act upon what you have learned."
There were gasps around the reception hall, and Suzaku narrowed his eyes, his mind racing in an attempt to see through Zero's plot. Could it be that he intended to lose? What was his reasoning? If in fact Lelouch had reclaimed the mask, then this could just be a pawn, and showing his face would be a way to throw everyone off the true Zero's scent.
As the room began to fill with the excited speculations of the masses of guests and guards surrounding them, Kaguya trotted back to Zero's side and Kallen looked up at him with worry etched into her face.
"Zero, is that-?!"
Schneizel held up a hand, signalling for peace, and at once the other wedding guests quieted down.
"How very generous of you, Zero." He directed a small smile at the rebel leader, donning his most-worn mask of weary benovolence. "I will accept your counter-offer."
LLLLLLLLLLLL
There was absolute silence from those watching as Zero and Schneizel peered at each other from either side of their game of chess, their hands dancing back and forth and their pieces making syncopated clacks against the board. At one moment Zero was ahead, but the next he found himself at a disadvantage - again and again until finally he had no choice.
Zero paused then dramatically plucked his king from the board to move it ahead one space. His play was met with hushed bewilderment from the onlookers, but Schneizel was unphased. He smiled and placed his fingers around his own king, and to the shock of everyone, moved it forward as well.
By now it could be reasoned by those watching that both of them had abandoned playing the game with any real intent to win, each of them pushing their kings to their respective front lines until eventually there was no more room for them to advance.
The black king of Zero and the white king of Schneizel stood one space apart, daring the other to move forward.
It was Schneizel's turn, and he sat back in his seat to consider his options. No matter how he acted the game would descend into a potentially endless cycle of cat and mouse, both he and Zero attempting fruitlessly to trap the other and claim victory. It was truly disappointing.
"It wasn't my intention," Zero offered at last, no doubt coming to the same conclusion as the prince, "but shall we declare this a draw?"
"I think not." Schneizel smiled again, an idea coming to mind. He picked up his king. "You would do well not to underestimate the White King, my friend."
Behind his mask Zero hissed.
"You wouldn't...!"
It was too late. Schneizel had set his king down once more, placing it directly in the path of Zero's own.
"Checkmate."
No one could believe what they were witnessing, Kallen and Suzaku, Odysseus and Kaguya, and others still, all exclaiming at the bold and foolish move the Prime Minister of Britannia had made.
"What is this?" Zero demanded of the prince. "You call checkmate when it is clearly my win? Why? Tell me, Prince Schneizel, is it that you expect me to draw my king back? - to refuse a victory that I have not earned? Or do you think I'll take advantage of your refusal to continue, and prove myself easy to manipulate?"
Standing vigilantly by Zero's side, Kallen narrowed her eyes, finally understanding what was going on. Under his featureless black mask Zero was really Lelouch, a prince of the Empire, and Schneizel was his brother. It only made sense that Zero would instantly decipher his brother's intentions: This was a ploy to get the leader of the Black Knights to reveal something about himself. Schneizel might lose the game, and Suzaku would be honour-bound to join Zero as per the wager Schneizel had agreed to, but in return he would gain valuable information about Zero's character, and would no doubt be able to use it to outmanoeuvre him at a a later date.
As everyone in the palace watched on in suspense, Zero made a show of considering what to do, folding one arm across his stomach so he could lean his other elbow against it and resting his mask's chin in the crook of his thumb and finger.
"Which would I do?" he said to himself, though loud enough for everyone to hear. "I wonder... Or perhaps..."
Zero sat forward and reached out one hand toward the board. His fingers hovered over his king ominously. Then, without warning, he reached for a pawn, waiting patiently to his king's right, and moved it at a diagonal, knocking over Schneizel's king.
Instantly the room became awash with gasps as Zero stole victory from Schneizel el Britannia, dealing the prince his first defeat in chess ever.
Suzaku stepped back in horror, his eyes wide.
"No..."
"That's it!" Kallen blinked in astonishment, hardly believing the sight in front of her. "He's won!"
For a mere fraction of a moment, almost unnoticeably quick, Schneizel's mask of calm assuredness faltered, his lips quirking down into a frown.
"Well..." he began, his expression returning to normal but his voice not following, instead sounding as if he were holding back frustration. "With a pawn... That's an interesting approach. You're a different man from how I assumed you to be, Zero."
Zero sat back, his relatively relaxed posture telling everyone exactly how he felt about the outcome of their game.
"In my battles against Cornelia in Area 11 I learned something, Prince Schneizel. And that is to place my trust in my men."
His voice, filtered through his mask's synthesizer, dark and metallic, grew caustic, and Zero sneered.
"Analyze that, Your Highness."
At this, Schneizel could no longer keep the irritation from his face. Zero had defied his provocation and denied him the insight he'd hoped for, and now the man was taunting him.
The prince was about to ask Zero as calmly as possible to leave and not come back, but was interrupted by the sound of gasping and shouting behind him, and he turned in his seat to see Nina, a shining gold and silver steak knife in hand, rushing toward him.
"Zero!" she shrieked, hysterical, her voice squeaking with rage.
In an instant the room became filled with motion, Zero and Schneizel leaping from their seats and Kallen and Kanon stepping in to protect them. The crowd who had been watching their game stepped back in fear, and Suzaku threw himself into Nina, holding her back while she continued screaming.
"Princess Euphemia will be avenged!"
"Stop it, Nina!" Suzaku wrestled against the girl, trying to use the barest force necessary to pacify her. "Drop the knife!"
She broke free and dove at Zero, intending to run him through, but Kallen stood fast. Her arms reached out quick as black and silver lightning and snatched Nina's wrists, then twisted, disarming her in one fell motion and stopping short of breaking them entirely.
Nina dropped to the floor, weeping and howling, blaming Suzaku and Kallen for being Elevens and demanding the resurrection of Euphemia li Britannia.
"My profound apologies, Zero," Schneizel finally said once Milly came through the crowd to take her friend away, not sounding at all sorry. "You have beaten me. Please take Sir Kururugi and be on your way. I'll have the Lancelot and its crew sent over to Horai Island after the party's over. Also, I'd like to remind you not to attend the ceremony tomorrow."
Kallen stepped over to Zero's side and Kaguya came scampering from where she'd been sitting with Tianzi, and Zero folded his arms beneath his cape.
"As you wish, Prince Schneizel." Zero turned to leave, but then paused, looking back at his archnemesis with his blank, visored helm. "I don't know who you expected to meet if I had been forced to reveal myself to you, but I am quite certain the result would have been disappointing."
Schneizel raised a brow curiously, silently permitting the leader of the Black Knights to explain himself, and Zero continued.
"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh, Prince Schneizel; there is an idea. In some ways you could say I am the same as the man who led the Black Rebellion. In other ways you might find I am very much unlike him. But though the man who takes up his sword may be different, Zero will always remain unchanged."
No one spoke after that, for there was no way to respond. Kaguya looked up at Zero, her eyes gleaming with wonder. Schneizel gave him a hard look of disdain. Suzaku glared at him, trying to figure out just what Zero meant by all that. And Kallen simply stared, the only one in the room who understood the truth of Zero's - Lelouch's - words.
He was different, wasn't he? Kallen could tell, and it was becoming more apparent to her all the time: Zero had been cold and calculating at the beginning, but still awe-inspiring. Now, while all that remained, there was the faintest hint of familiarity in his tone when he spoke to the Black Knights, and if she wasn't imagining it, a kindness when he was speaking to her.
Something had changed in Lelouch since the Black Rebellion, and the game of chess with Schneizel was indicative of it. Before, he would have fixated on his king, trusting only that piece - a representation of himself - to either advance or retreat from Schneizel's own king. But instead he'd used a pawn, and even mentioned his trust in his soldiers.
Though Lelouch had clearly endured much since becoming Zero, and would continue to suffer the longer he fought, Kallen could see that he'd come out of those trials a better person.
"Well, Lady Kaguya," Zero addressed at last, turning to the Black Knight mascot and then Kallen, "I think it's time to for us to take our leave. Kallen?"
Kaguya grinned and took Zero's arm. Kallen nodded. Zero glanced to Suzaku.
"Sir Kururugi," he commanded. "Come."
Suzaku trembled with fury and balled his hands into fists. He clenched his teeth and exerted himself to stop from growling at his new master. This wasn't how things were supposed to go. Schneizel shouldn't have lost like that. He shouldn't have bartered with Suzaku's freedom. But most importantly, Suzaku shouldn't have agreed to the two kings' wager.
After taking a deep breath, Suzaku closed his eyes and let his muscles go slack.
"Yes," he said slowly, "Master Zero."
LLLLLLLLLLLL
Zero had taken an unarmed standard VTOL troopship for his excursion from Horai to the Forbidden City, the expansive interior seating him and his two followers quite easily. It wasn't luxurious in the slightest, and not fitting his usual sense of style, but the Black Knights didn't have an entirely stable source of income and vehicles just yet, so it simply had to do.
The mood of the initial trip was bordering on somber, and was spent in silence, but the journey back to the manmade island was quite a lot more upbeat.
Originally, Kallen had been nervous at the prospect of going to Tianzi's wedding party, even if Kaguya had an invitation and she was just along as a bodyguard. To her, it was an enemy stronghold, and not even the presence of their invincible leader Zero could set her mind at ease. Now though, she was positively beaming, cracking jokes with Kaguya and taking every opportunity to tease and harass Suzaku, sitting as far away as possible from her and Zero on the grey metal slab seat on the opposite side of the ship.
He said nothing most the way back, his head down and arms crossed, a disgraced reverse of Zero, sitting tall and proud, though equally silent.
"Suzaku," Zero said finally, Kallen and Kaguya quieting down to let their leader speak. "Now that you belong to me, I shall have to give you a position in my forces. I have decided to call you the Knight of Zero."
Suzaku's head snapped up and his eyes focused on Zero, blazing with disgust.
"Haven't you done enough!? You've trampled over everything I cared about and forced me to forsake my oaths to the Empire, and now you have to torment me on top of it!?"
"It's a fitting title though, don't you think?" Zero's tone was conversational, no ill will behind his words, and that irritated Suzaku all the more. "You are no longer the Knight of Seven. But you are still a knight in the service of Zero. It only makes sense to label you as such."
"It's mocking the Knights of the Round!"
Kallen was quite enjoying Suzaku's humiliation, but as he spoke with Zero a thought came to her mind.
"Zero," she addressed politely, "aren't I still your knight?"
Zero looked down at the redhead beside him.
"I considered that, Kallen, and I believe Suzaku would be better suited to that position than yourself."
"What?" Kallen's jaw dropped. She was being replaced? Just like that?
"No, it's hardly fitting for someone of your talents and loyalty to me to serve as a mere bodyguard. You could use a promotion, don't you think?"
The Captain of Zero Squad blinked, and Kaguya to Zero's other side cheered.
"Oh, Kallen, isn't it wonderful? He's acknowledging you as one of his future brides!"
Kallen's face went as red as her hair.
"Eh!?"
"Along with myself, and C.C. though, of course."
On the other side of the transport bay Suzaku huffed.
"I despise you, Zero," he spat, not interested in the two girls' chatter. "What makes you so sure I won't betray you?"
Zero didn't dignify Suzaku with an answer. Instead, he simply laughed at the boy, the sound coming out tinny and sinister from his mask's voice modulator.
He was met with a prolonged glare, the former Knight of Seven not taking his eyes from the rebel leader for even a moment.
"My dear, Suzaku," Zero began finally, seeing Suzaku wasn't going to let this go, "I happen to know for certain that you won't betray me. You're far too stubborn for that, and your deference to authority is unlike any I've ever seen. And now you follow my authority."
Zero took one hand from beneath his cape and flung it out before him dismissively.
"However, if necessary, I can always assign Kaguya as your guardian."
"Oh!" Kaguya clapped her hands together. "That would be marvelous!"
Suzaku's face hardened at Zero's mocking suggestion. There was simply no end to it, it seemed. But, then, he was used to this sort of thing. He'd known all along that the world would always reject him for holding true to his ideals. Kallen and Zero and Kaguya all making fun of him was only logical. He'd expected it.
Zero was right though. Suzaku wouldn't betray him. It went against his principles. No matter how much he hated it, he'd agreed to join him if Zero beat Schneizel at chess. Betraying him could end the war, but such an end would be gained through despicable means, so wouldn't be worth anything anyway. In other words...
"That won't be necessary," Suzaku replied to Zero's quip, utterly defeated. "I'll fulfill my duties to you."
LLLLLLLLLLLL
There was a huge reception for Zero when his airship finally arrived back on Horai. Hundreds of Black Knights and others stood in attendance near the landing zone, waiting, hoping to simply see the masked hero with their own eyes. Only a few of his officers were present though, most of them in the designated Black Knights Horai HQ Command Center, and C.C. was finally indulging in some pizza topped with tabasco sauce, but at least Tohdoh and Tamaki were there to greet him.
The airship touched down amid cheers from the assembled crowds, welcoming Zero home as if he had just come back from the front lines and not attended a party. The volume and intensity of the onlookers only grew when he finally stepped out in all his caped glory, stopping to survey the scene before him.
Zero was met by Tohdoh and Tamaki as Kallen came out from the airship behind him.
"Well?" Tamaki probed with a boisterous laugh. "How was it?"
Zero looked upon his 'best bud'.
"All tasks at hand have been cleared."
"That good, huh?"
There were gasps and sudden boos from the crowd as Kaguya skipped out from the airship behind Kallen, her arm curled around that of a boy in a white uniform, denoting him as a Knight of the Round Table.
"Zero?" Tohdoh questioned gruffly.
Zero acknowledged Tohdoh with a glance, then held up a hand for silence, and at once everyone quieted down.
"People of the USJ! Behold: Suzaku Kururugi now fights for Japan!"
There were whispers of confusion all around at Zero's declaration, but the leader of the Black Knights didn't waste time to elaborate, instead nodding once to Tohdoh and excusing himself. The crowds parted for Zero and he walked with absolute confidence between the hordes of black and silver-clad men and women, Kallen and Kaguya following closely behind, Suzaku between them to prevent the mob from grabbing him.
They made their way quickly to the Black Knights' new KMF carrier flagship, the Ikaruga, donated by India in secret with hopes Zero would use it to liberate them from Chinese rule, and once aboard, Suzaku was released from Kallen and Kaguya's protective grasp.
"Lady Kaguya," Zero said as they marched down an empty hall toward his private chambers, "could you grant me a favour?"
The Japanese princess' eyes lit up.
"Why, certainly!"
"Would you acquire a suitable uniform for Suzaku now that he is to be the Black Knights' Knight of Zero?"
"Of course!" She smiled wide and nodded vigourously. "Anything for my future husband!"
And with that, Kaguya turned on her heel and ran off, presumably toward the Horai command center while Suzaku grunted in frustration at Zero for forcing him to wear the Black Knight colours.
At last they entered into the Ikaruga's lavish quarters reserved for Zero, and Kallen shut the door behind them. Suzaku was used to such opulent settings by now, having spent a year as one of the Emperor of Britannia's own favoured soldiers, but he still had to marvel at the difference between Zero and Britannia.
Back in the Imperial Palace, everything was marble and gold, and covered in frescoes, and Baroque statues littered every room and hall. Everything about the place extolled Britannia's past glories and revered their history and myths. It was all very overstated and bordered on the ridiculous.
But here, in Zero's quarters aboard a warship, there was no white to be found. Everything was painted or coloured in muted tones of blue, pink, purple, or black, although the gold was still present. There were multiple bookcases lined up against one wall and various large computer screens assembled in one alcove of the main chamber. The whole setting was one of calm compared to Britannia's visually stunning and bold displays.
And Suzaku hated to admit he preferred it that way.
"I'll leave you be, then," Kallen said after a moment as Zero wandered into his room and Suzaku stood by, simply taking in his surroundings.
Zero unlatched his cape and draped it across one of several couches in the center of the room, then threw out a hand casually.
"Nonsense, Kallen. Please stay." He looked back at her and gestured toward the couches. "Make yourself comfortable."
Kallen blinked in surprise, feeling her cheeks growing warmer, then smiled and sauntered over to sit down. The troopship had been roomy, but the seating was among the most uncomfortable Kallen had ever endured, and the violet cushions in Zero's quarters were a welcome change from that.
Zero turned his gaze upon Suzaku next, still standing near the door.
"You too, Suzaku," he ordered pleasantly, then unlocked his mask from the back with a click, removing it and revealing the pale, sharp features and single glowing red Geass Eye of Lelouch vi Britannia. "We have much to discuss."
Suzaku only sighed and shook his head at what he saw.
"So it is you, Lelouch. I knew it."
"But you had no evidence," Lelouch finished for his friend with a smirk. He stretched his arms and sat down, then leaned forward. There was a chessboard set up on a small table at the center of the couches, and he reached out to pick up a white knight piece and examine it, turning it about in his fingers. "You can stop glaring, Suzaku. We're on the same side now -" he tossed the piece to the newly dubbed Knight of Zero "- the way it was always supposed to be."
Suzaku scowled and closed his grip around the white knight.
"I don't want to be on your side!"
Lelouch's smile didn't recede. He calmly sat back and raised his eyebrows, letting a touch of amusement enter his voice.
"Why?"
"You have to ask? You're a monster. You don't care about anyone other than yourself."
"And you're any better?" Lelouch watched as Suzaku approached him and Kallen reluctantly. "Up until this exact moment your strategy has been to step on everyone just to elevate yourself."
Suzaku spat back, unable to hold the hate from his voice.
"Don't you dare compare me to you...!"
"And why not!?" Lelouch stood up, his good humour evaporating instantaneously. "I think there's plenty for us to compare! I lead a rebel army that seeks to end Britannia's tyranny. You put down freedom fighters to earn medals!"
Suzaku strutted up to Lelouch, getting right in his face but not lifting a hand to initiate violence.
"There's no room in the world for terrorists."
Lelouch didn't back down, his lips plummeting into a vicious scowl of his own.
"Then what about your campaigns in France and Spain!? Are the soldiers of sovereign nations in the European Union terrorists as well? Well, Suzaku!?"
Kallen watched on uncertainly as her two former classmates - her rival and her leader - one who she had found quite pleasant until he was revealed as the pilot of the Lancelot, and the other she'd abhorred until he was revealed as Zero, faced each other down and traded verbal blows. She knew ever since their confrontation on Kamine Island during the Black Rebellion that their friendship was as good as over, but still, she hadn't expected quite such a ferocious reunion.
"You want to change Britannia," Lelouch quipped, "but all I see is Britannia changing you."
Lelouch held his ground but Suzaku took a step back. He grit his teeth, realizing he'd failed to meet Lelouch's challenge and showed weakness in front of him. He looked away as he offered a flimsy excuse.
"Britannian rule was inevitable. If I wasn't fighting for them, they still would've conquered the world."
"So you're just trying to cement your place in the new order, is that it?" Lelouch's words dripped with venom and malice, and sensing an opening in Suzaku's defenses, he continued to attack. "How pitiful. You're no better than a Britannian nobleman, only loyal because it benefits him to be so. You don't stand for anything other than attaining power for yourself."
Suzaku regained his footing in the argument and riposted with a snarl.
"That's a laugh coming from you of all people! All you do is hurt people for your own self-satisfaction! Liar! You don't care about Japan at all. You just want people to follow you around and do what you say!"
As he spoke Suzaku came upon an idea - the most hurtful thing he could say - and he let it fly.
"You're a Britannian prince after all, aren't you!?"
Now it was Lelouch's turn to step back. His eyes went wide and his mouth gaped open, but then, slowly his face morphed into an expression of the deepest hate, his Geass unknowingly beginning to glow even brighter as he punctuated his slow reply.
"You. Take. That. Back."
"I won't, Lelouch. You told me, remember? When we were kids, you said your uncles and aunts killed each other to be next in line for the throne, until your father was the only one left. Maybe that's your goal! You're using the Japanese people - playing on their despair and forcing them to fight for you - and when the war is over and Britannia's obliterated, there won't be anyone to stand in your way of becoming emperor."
Suzaku paused to think what to say next, and he went with the only thing that came to mind - the only thing he ever did think about, and the only thing that mattered to him.
"I won't make excuses for what I've done. I've hurt a lot of innocent people. But if you hadn't stopped me I would have become the Knight of One, and I would have rescued Japan. But you..." The Lancelot's pilot, the White Death of Britannia, thought back, the images of that time seeming so incredibly vivid in his memory, even now, more than a year later. "You use your Geass to steal people's souls and force them to obey you. You make them turn against everything they care about and turn them into a villain. Then you can come in like a big damn hero and kill them, and grandstand over their corpse!"
He delivered the words with as much vitriol as he could muster, but the effect they had on Lelouch was not the one Suzaku expected. He'd expected Lelouch to get even angrier and maybe lose his temper, or else try to change the subject and thus demonstrate that he'd lost their argument. Instead, he seemed to deflate entirely, all his energy bleeding away in the time it took to blink.
Lelouch plopped down into his seat and set his elbows against his legs so he could lean his chin atop his fingers. He answered slowly.
"You're talking about Euphy, aren't you?"
"Damn right I am!" Suzaku shouted, throwing out a hand vengefully. "How could you? Even after all this time, I still can't believe what you did to her."
Kallen had been watching all this time in silence, unsure if she should step in. It bothered her that she was just a witness to the two boys' fury again, just like before at Kamine. And yet, there was nothing she could say to add to any of it. This was between them, and she just happened to be along for the ride. However...
"Lelouch," she started cautiously, "what's he talking about? He mentioned something like this before, didn't he?"
Suzaku glanced at Kallen before returning his attention squarely on Lelouch and scoffing derisively.
"I figured you didn't tell anyone what really happened - what you did! You want to know, Kallen? Princess Euphemia was Lelouch's sister. And he used his Geass on her! He made her into a killer just so the Specially Administrated Zone of Japan wouldn't happen!"
"Lelouch..." Kallen felt like she was sinking in her seat - as if the whole world had suddenly stopped making sense. "What?"
Finally it was time for Lelouch to answer, and without moving from his contemplative pose and keeping his gaze directed straight ahead, seeing everything, and yet also seeing nothing all at once, he gave his measured reply.
"And all of Japan rose up in response. A few thousand dead is a small price for revolution."
Suzaku had had enough and he stepped up to grab Lelouch by the collar with one hand, pulling him up from the couch to look him in the eye. Kallen blinked and shook her head, trying to return to reality, and jumped up to intervene and protect her leader.
"Only a monster could think of people so coldly." Suzaku seethed at Lelouch, his green eyes meeting the noble purple and baleful red of Lelouch's own. "As if they were pawns to be sacrificed!"
Something about Suzaku's words rekindled Lelouch's fighting spirit, and he shoved his oldest friend away, freeing himself from his grasp.
"Then you should be pleased you're no longer on the same side as my brother! I value people as a means to an end. Schneizel places no value on people at all! To him everyone is just the same - interchangeable! Replaceable! A human life is worthless to him, because to him life itself is meaningless!"
Suzaku was momentarily taken aback. That's not what he expected Lelouch to say. But then again, there was no way to predict how Lelouch would act. There never had been. It was why Zero had run Britannia ragged before the Black Rebellion, and was continuing to do so even now when he was directly in their scopes.
Something seemed off to Suzaku, and before he attempted a rebuttal he looked down. He was still holding the white knight, clenched tight in one fist - so much so that the chess piece's unicorn horn had torn a hole in his glove and pierced his palm. He had entirely forgotten about it until he realized he was feeling pain and was bleeding.
He leaned down to put the piece back on the board, now stained red, then looked back up at Lelouch.
"Euphemia was your sister..."
Lelouch threw out both arms and screamed back.
"And I killed her! Is that what you wanted to hear!?"
Kallen had stopped her advance when Lelouch threw Suzaku off of him, and now she, along with Suzaku, stood in utter shock at Lelouch's response. There was such emotion carved into his face and infused into every word he threw like daggers, and it seemed like he was on the verge of tears as he continued to shout Suzaku down.
"You think I don't regret it!? You think I don't constantly wonder if there was some other way!? I did what had to be done! There was no other way. It was already too late! The Geass command was given, and there was nothing I could do to stop it!"
Suzaku took Lelouch's words in then threw them right back without hesitation.
"You wouldn't have had to kill her if you hadn't given her a command at all!"
"I DIDN'T!"
This was enough to stop Suzaku from answering again. Never before had he ever gotten an outright denial from Lelouch. Never. Not about a thing. Even here, he'd only skirted the issue of Euphemia, neither agreeing with nor denying Suzaku's accusations until the Honourary Britannian was able to coax a more specific statement from him.
But, with that said, Lelouch couldn't mean to say that...
"Look!" the Black Prince demanded, pointing to his own face. "Look into my eyes! You see it, don't you? Geass!"
It was true, Suzaku could see it. He could see the shining red sigil of Geass burning in Lelouch's left eye. It was apparent to him the first time he saw it on Kamine Island, when Zero was finally unmasked, but at the time he'd been so swept up in the night's events, as well as the reveal that Lelouch had been Zero all along, that he didn't bother to bring it up. Besides, he'd been primed by V.V. to expect such a sight.
But ever since Zero first appeared, Suzaku had never noticed the Geass before when he looked into Lelouch's eyes. It was only after the Black Rebellion that he started seeing it - on Kamine and all the way to the Imperial Palace. Surely Lelouch had his Geass before that time. So why hadn't he seen it before then?
Lelouch continued, an indescribable mix of anger and sorrow in his tone.
"I see it every day when I look in the mirror. It glows in the dark and keeps me awake at night!" He reached a trembling hand up to his face and held it aloft over his left eye, obscuring it from view, almost as if he were embarassed and didn't want Suzaku and Kallen to see it. "I can't turn it off! I said something stupid and Euphemia...!"
Suzaku's face paled and his jaw dropped. His brows knit together in disbelief and he tilted his head toward Lelouch. He questioned slowly and timidly.
"Lelouch... What are you trying to say?"
"How was I supposed to know something like that would happen!? C.C. doesn't tell me anything!"
"Lelouch, are you saying what happened with Euphemia was an accident?"
Lelouch's whole body was shivering, a sign that an adrenaline rush was finally coming to an end, and he practically fell back against his couch, letting his face drop into waiting palms.
"I went there with the intention of using my Geass on Euphemia. I was the one who was supposed to be shot though. Not her. Not anyone else." His voice was slow and quiet, barely above a whisper. "We talked for a while. We were just talking... I told her I had a power and could make her do anything I wanted... Even if it was something as awful as killing all the Japanese... It wasn't a command. But she went and did it anyway."
Suzaku stood still, completely stunned. He turned his head to see Kallen, mirroring his pose, as if frozen in time, transfixed by Lelouch's confession.
For the first time since entering Zero's chambers, Suzaku took a seat.
"You..." He tried getting the words out, but they felt foreign on his tongue knowing that he was speaking to Zero. "You're telling the truth, aren't you?"
Lelouch didn't move. Lelouch didn't answer.
"Lelouch," Suzaku tried again, emotion flooding his tone anew, but no longer that of hatred, instead being that of despair, "why didn't you tell me? Back on that island I asked you why you killed her - why didn't you explain!?"
Suzaku gave Lelouch a minute to say something. He turned his head over to Kallen and to his surprise found that she was staring at him uncertainly. They shared a moment, speaking without words, and she looked back to Lelouch, then crept slowly over to him, sitting down by his side.
After another minute Lelouch finally spoke again, just as weakly as before, giving Suzaku the clarity he so needed right now.
"Because Nunnally was taken. I called for a truce, didn't I? It might seem like it was a long time ago to you, but to me it wasn't so long at all. I've only been myself for a little while, after all."
Kallen raised a brow in Suzaku's direction and he looked away in shame. He knew what Lelouch was referring to even if she didn't. She had to have known that Lelouch had amnesia before returning to his role as Zero, but clearly he hadn't explained just where that amnesia came from.
Geass: The power to rewrite any and all memories of a target with just a second of eye contact.
Suzaku had helped enforce this fate upon Lelouch. He'd done so gleefully. And now all of a sudden he felt a year's worth of regret for doing so hit him all at once.
Lelouch continued on, heedless of Suzaku's sudden inner turmoil.
"I asked you to help me find Nunnally. After that, I would have explained everything. Besides, even if I had explained myself at the time, you wouldn't have believed me anyway. You would have said I was making excuses and trying to get out of what I'd done. It would have been exactly in line with your interpretation of Zero's actions."
Suzaku felt like he should say something; should thank Lelouch for admitting the truth, or else apologize - something!
"The Black Knights," he muttered eventually. "Are they under your control?"
"You know what my Geass does. You know exactly what its limitations are. I can only use it on a person once. It's why you can look me in the eye while we talk. Because I already gave you an order. You too, Kallen."
Kallen's brows arched in confusion.
"You used your Geass on me?" Once again she felt like she was losing track of what was real and what wasn't. "You were controlling me? In Babel Tower you said-!"
"It was your choice to be there. I had no influence over you at all. I used my Geass on you once, a long time ago, right after Shinjuku. I had you answer some questions. Nothing more."
"But how...?" she wondered back. "How do I know for sure that's true? How can I be sure you're not controlling me even now?"
Lelouch took his face out from his palms and looked Kallen in the eye, blue meeting purple and red.
"Kallen," he started slowly, "put your hair down."
"Huh? Why?" Kallen scrunched up her face in confusion, not taking her eyes from Lelouch's.
"Make a silly face," he commanded next, earning the same consternated look from her. "Pull out your sidearm and shoot me."
Kallen simply continued staring at Lelouch as if he'd gone mad until he clarified.
"If you were under my control, Kallen, you wouldn't be able to say no. Your conscious brain would shut off, and you would comply without hesitation."
Suzaku watched this exchange intently, observing Lelouch and the way he explained things. Like he'd noted before, it was so incredibly roundabout. He didn't confirm anything. He didn't refute anything either. Considering it like this, Suzaku figured this must've been how he was able to ensnare people so easily into following him. He exuded an aura of strength and supremacy - as if such unsophisticated concepts as 'yes' or 'no' were beneath him.
"You still haven't answered my question," Suzaku said eventually.
Lelouch glanced at his oldest friend then let his vision fall down to his feet once more.
"The Black Knights obey me because they believe in me. I have no use for an army of slaves that cannot appreciate why they're fighting in the first place."
There was silence for a short while and Lelouch, Suzaku, and Kallen all sat together, each thinking and remembering. Then a voice crackled on an unseen comm system, the voice belonging to Deithard.
"Commander Zero, there's a Britannian airship incoming. They say you're expecting them to make a delivery."
Lelouch took a deep breath, steeling himself, then stood up, pulling his cape off the back of his couch. He strode over to his computer system, swirling his cape around his shoulders as he did and set it into place, then hit a button.
"I am," he replied, taking a deeper and darker affectation. "Allow them to land and unload their cargo, but maintain maximum security until they leave."
"Understood."
With that, Lelouch spun on his heel and marched back to the couches where Suzaku and Kallen still sat, grabbing his mask and heading for the door.
"Think what you will, Suzaku," he said, looking back at him, all of his earlier weakness gone, or perhaps more likely, well concealed, "but from now on you work for me. You may not agree with my methods, but be assured, I do intend to liberate this world from Britannia. Do everything in your power to help me succeed in this goal, and perhaps we can reduce the number of casualties getting the result WE want."
At last Lelouch set his mask back over his face, hiding his Geass and his true identity entirely.
Zero opened the door to his chambers and faced foward before addressing Suzaku and Kallen one last time.
"Now, both of you, come with me. We need to discuss the plan for crashing Tianzi's wedding tomorrow."
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