Author's Note: This piece is paired with 'Somebody Calls You' and was co-written by ladyraveneye.
oOoOo
Picture Yourself
It was a routine mission. Barely even a mission at all, in fact-a simple visit to the kindergarten.
This was the primary objective of Pink Diamond's position on this planet, after all-overseeing how construction was going, ensuring the Injectors were in working order, evaluating the place where, centuries down the line, new Gems would emerge. She had a small envoy with her: a few scientists, an engineer, her Pearl of course, and a few warriors as a precautionary guard. The thought of there actually being any danger here for Gems was laughable.
But the Kindergarten was unstable, as Kindergartens tended to be. There were loose stones. Loose boulders.
An emerald was the first to notice the landslide. She shouted out for everyone to run for cover. Most did- except for the ruby, who was clearly distracted, thinking about something else. No one in the envoy reacted in time as Pink Diamond surged forward to push the ruby out of the way. There was nothing they could do as the heavy boulders fell onto their leader's body and crushed it flat.
There were things she could have done, of course. She had both shields and protective bubbles to summon. She had healing tears; there could have conceivably been enough time for her to cry and heal the damage she had sustained before her physical form dissolved. But the only thing she had done, aside from push the ruby to safety, was make sure she was positioned so that her own Gem would not be damaged.
Yes, the thought of danger had been laughable. And truly, as the world around her vanished and she retreated into her gem, she felt like laughing. The one thing her retinue hadn't expected was a Diamond actively choosing to run headlong into danger.
The only thing she really regretted was her Pearl's screaming cries ringing through the rocks overtop of her.
But what else was she to do? She wanted to regenerate; she had wanted to for a long while. A chance to do so would only happen if she manufactured it herself.
She allows herself to float, passively, through the mindspace of her gem. It has been a long, long time since she's done this. Despite the discomfort and danger inherent in regenerating, there's a sort of tranquility to it. The serenity of being completely alone, in your own mindscape, a place which is, in fact, you.
She 'gazes' around, if that's something you can do without eyes. It's changed, from the last time she's been here. There is still the deep infinite blackness of space above, a glittering vista of galaxies and planets and comets, stretching on forever. But the land beneath it has shifted and changed. It is no longer a proud, sprawling city-scape of her people-it is a field. Long, tall grasses rustle gently in the wind. Her mind has constructed other plants, too; trees and bushes and flowers and roses. It is unmistakably Earth, underneath an alien sky.
It's lovely.
Well, time to get to work, she thinks.
She starts with the basics. Torso, head, legs, arms. Her newly imagined feet dig into the soil and roots of her earthen field. She's barefoot.
Eyes, mouth, nose, ears. She fiddles with them next. She wants her eyes larger, wider. She'd never bothered much with a nose before- but this new planet is filled with such glorious scents, she wants a body which can capture them more fully. And a tongue, she had always thought of it before as nothing but an instrument through which to create speech and song. But humans and their habit of eating- of doing so for joy and companionship, not just out of necessity- well, it intrigues her. She wants to experience taste. Understand what they get out of those spices they use for seasoning.
She does her hair next. That had been her proudest change to her last form. She loved how that glorious pink mane had looked, had felt, the weight of it. And of course, the way it had made her sister Diamonds squirm. Perhaps it had been petty, flaunting her powers in such a frivolous manner, but sometimes you needed such frivolities. She makes her hair even bigger now. This time, it will be an active taunt.
She only has so much mass to work with. To make that hair, she has to sacrifice some height. She's more than prepared to pay that price. Height has its advantages of course, but size is not actually strength. She'll put some of the extra energy she'd have used to lug around a larger body into muscles instead. They will be useful, in the battles which are certain to come.
She builds herself soft. Fat. For the humans, such a shape represents safety. Security. It means that they have enough food, not only to survive, but to thrive.
What next? Ah, yes. Clothing.
She wants something different. Striking. It must set her apart, immediately, from the others. No jumpsuits. No armour. No gauntlets or boots or helms or belts.
A dress.
She goes for something simple. It must be. She'll be wearing this into battle; she'll still need to be able to move freely. It must not have frills which will catch. She considers colours. She doesn't want the pink to be overpowering. She considers green, but decides that it clashes, as does red. She scoffs down yellow and blue on the spot. White- white is risky, of course. But her sisters do not have a monopoly on all those colours, and she likes that one. It's pure and fresh.
A white dress, then. Long and flowing. She layers it, like petals. It's a subtle detail, but pleasing.
She only truly hesitates when she comes to the gem at her belly.
A diamond. That's the shape of the cut she's had there ever since she first formed. But she won't carry that symbol any longer. She refuses.
What, then? A triangle is just as bad. A circle- too simple. A pentagon- too repetitive. A square wouldn't work at all. And anyway, she wants something more unique. Something that can be a symbol, not just for her, but for all her people, and this planet.
She thinks about it for a long time. Then she remembers a piece of art, something she'd seen painted on the wall in a human encampment. A glittery little shape on a background of black. She'd asked what is was.
'A star,' the human painter had explained, pointing up at the sky.
And of course, it was silly. She had seen stars up close- or as close as anyone could get. Stars weren't like that at all. They were merely boiling, burning balls of plasma, fuelled by nuclear fusion.
But the funny thing was- when you looked up into the sky at night, the stars' light filtered through the planet's atmosphere and made them twinkle, and they did look a little like that.
Yes. That would work. It would be a reminder, to everyone, that she is not fighting against her people, but for them. Gems are the children of the stars, and they will not relinquish them.
Carefully, defiantly, she frames her gem with a five-pointed star.
She realizes then, her name will have to change as well.
Gems don't truly have names, of course-they have castes, titles, occupations-but names are far too individual. The Diamonds all have the distinct privilege of being the only gemstone of their kind and so they tended to float nebulously above the no name rule, like so many other things they indulge in while forbidding all other gems-
That is when she knows.
If her physical form had existed in that moment, it would have laughed with anticipatory pleasure at what her Pearl would think.
It takes herself a long time, to construct and design the new form. Distantly, she's aware that the others must be worried about her. They're probably fussing. She would find their concern almost amusing- except, she thinks again of her Pearl. She is almost certainly in a state of panic by now. It is regrettable, keeping her, and the others, waiting.
She gives her new body one last look over. Ensures there are no details she's overlooked, no flaws which need fixing.
She's perfect.
She lets her light shine.
In the fleeting place between mindspace and body, old forms shifted around her gem. The senses of a physical form were returning-she smelled the cold, icy wind and felt the myriad of stares on her. She finished reforming in the air, arms outstretched, hair billowing, dress fluttering. She floated down to the ground, the image of grace.
Pearl was right there to meet her, spear in hand. She had forgotten to bow; she realized that quite suddenly and hurried to it, completely missing her liege's fond smile.
"Pink Diamond!" Pearl exclaimed, and it was as good a segue as she could have hoped for.
"No," she said, and she reached out for her lover. Put her new hand on her shoulder; made sure everyone could see it. "I am not a Diamond anymore," she announced. Her voice echoed through the amphitheater, through the mountain. Soon, it would echo through the entire galaxy. "Earth is a place of choice. I choose to be Rose, after the flowers on this planet."
She met Pearl's eyes directly. They were serious, and hopeful, just as they were the night of their first dance.
"Rose Quartz."