This originally was a prompt on tumblr: " things you said when you thought i was asleep " for the Missgood ship.
So this is just a short impression of a night when Missy stays with Osgood and thinks about their relationship.
Maybe leave a review, pls?
Missy didn't know what made her stay with Osgood overnight. She didn't do that kind of things; she didn't do relationships at all. The Mistress has never been good with all that romance stuff, but yet she tried to be better at it. She tried to have a proper relationship. And it was hard.
And yet she found herself lying next to Osgood as she watched her sleeping. It was kind of fascinating to watch this human next to her. For once: she did truly love her, and second: she never had the opportunity to watch a human sleep without the intention of killing them. It was… calming. In a strange kind of way.
Absentmindedly, Missy ran her fingers soothingly through Osgood's hair, though more to keep her occupied and not thinking about things she could do instead. Many wonderful things ran through her mind from just going out and finding some victim she could kill or torture just for the pure purpose of entertainment and the feeling of adrenaline running through her body. She needed it, but wouldn't admit that to Osgood. She was far too innocent to deal with her strange needs, even though she knew what Missy was capable of.
And that was the main reason she didn't understand why Osgood loved her. Why she kept up with her and stuck with her even though she'd kill people without a second thought. She was heartless and she knew it, she wasn't ashamed of it. But it wasn't what Osgood deserved. It was more like a punishment to her. And yet, Missy never said a word of it. At least not while Osgood was awake.
"People say I'm the crazy one, that I'm bonkers. They're right, I know. But they don't know that you're even more bonkers." Missy said with a low voice so she wouldn't wake her lover.
"Loving a psychopath, something has to be wrong with you. Maybe even more than me. Though, a Time Lord loving a human? I almost sound like the Doctor!" A thought she'd rather not have, despite the fact he was her best friend. They were different, that was why they worked. Kinda. It was complicated.
"Darling, I think I'd have to kill you if you'd ever hear what I'm telling you. You know I would. Could…. No I wouldn't… What are you even doing to me? A simple human… Rassilion, I'm a Time Lady! There are stranger stories though. Older ones as well."
The Time Lady sighed and shook her head. Where was she even going with that?
"You better be asleep deep and hear none of this, because no one must know about it. I'm afraid. I know me, I know you. And I know it will end badly, one day. I will hurt you, you will hate me, and it will be the end of it. I don't want this to happen, but I don't know how else it should be. If it can be any different. Loving another person properly, I've never been good at it. But you're worth all the pain I'm going to end up with. Everything I do, and will do, is just the best for you."
She hoped Osgood would know, that everything she did was just to protect her. She had to do it, even if it meant pain. But for now, their lives could be peaceful. For this one brief moment in time.
The Mistress shook her head and rolled onto her back as she turned her head towards the woman sleeping next to her. "Seeing you like this, it's almost sad you're never going to know about what I just told you." She whispered and turned her gaze to the ceiling. She would always think about their relationship, whenever she could spare the time. Thoughts where running through her mind as quick as the light itself. And in the end, she was so occupied by her thoughts, that Missy completely missed the small smile that appeared on Osgoods lips.
She would know.