There were a hundred over used adjectives to describe the room.
Dark. Empty. Damp. Isolated. Alone. Lonely; some words were obviously redundant.
A different set of vocabulary ran through his head.
Betrayed. Unwanted. Somber. Dejected. Colorless.
This was Allen Walker's reality.
Allen stared across the room at the now large golem that he had become rather fond of. Timcanpy was there from the start. In a way, it was Allen's second do over. When his time with Mana came to an end, Cross Marian entered the picture. Timcanpy was a constant in Allen's hectic and unpredictable life. While it had little capability in the way of holding a conversation, the golem was more than efficient with what it had.
Timcanpy was currently secured to the cobble stone ground by large restraints that buzzed with blue electricity of some kind. No doubt was it the orders doing. Timcanpy's teeth were clenched, biting back the urge to fight their captor's hold on them. Any attempt was futile, and the golem learned this quickly.
Allen grimaced at the obvious struggle of his friend. Timcanpy was only in this hellhole because the golem had defended Allen. The boy was thankful beyond belief, but at the same time apart of him wished his friend had turned his head the other way for their own sake. Selflessness was not only a strength in character, but as well as a persistent flaw.
Allen closed his eyes, leaning completely back against the wall he was already propping himself on. Letting his body slouch and bringing his knees closer to his chest, he held his bound left arm closer to his sternum. If nothing else, Link was a master of the CROW Binding technique. Allen laughed softly at the thought.
'Link gets the job done, I suppose,' Allen thought morbidly, and causally joked to himself in his own head.
"Well Tim, I guess it's you and me. Like old times." Allen's words echoed slightly in the empty space he would probably call home for a long time, if not a while. The golem grunted in response, making the boy give a small smile.
"I thought you would agree." Opening his eyes, the darkness in the room became real again. When eyes are closed, the person chooses to close out the light. The lack of light with open eyes was something else. It was empty, void of sunlight, even artificial color. The ex-exorcist now realized how true this was. Something as simple as a candle, firelight, anything but the dark of a shadow was out of reach. Impossible.
Allen's mind wandered aimlessly, coming back to settle on the Ark. The white room, the pristine piano amidst a large open space. He could almost be describing the very space he filled now, with the exception of color and the musical instrument. Both were lonely. Allen could recall and picture the very lines and symbols he and Mana created all those years past. Though now that he looked back, were they really theirs?
Allen hummed a quiet and soft melody. He couldn't open the Ark. He already knew that. The order, no doubt had made sure of this. Lvellie had specially requested this to be a necessity. There was not a shred of doubt in the boy's mind.
The words were not something he would forget for a long time. They were ingrained into his memory. Whether this was a good thing, or unfortunate, Allen could not be sure. Had he given it thought before now, he would have figured such a thing as lyrics and piano notes could never be considered an unfortunate thing. But where had they led him?
Softly, the boy's melody morphed into words.
"Soshite bouya wa nemuri ni tsuita,
Ikizuku hai no naka no honoo hitatsu,
Futatsu to
Ukabu fukurami itoshii yokogao
Daichi ni taruru ikusen no
Yume, yume..."
He let the last note linger, then falter, lost in the echo of the cell.
"I've seen you open the Ark a hundred times, but I didn't know it had words." Allen sat up instantly startled out of his trance like state. Someone was in the room with him. The door had to have made noise. It was noisy as hell when you moved the hinges even a little. It wasn't the first thing on the higher ups list to fix however. Allen stayed quiet. He realized he was afraid to speak; afraid of who stood in the dark with him. Friend, or enemy? Did he know the difference anymore?
"Yume. Dream. " The person spoke. "It's an interesting concept. We dream when we sleep, but it's an illusion of sorts. It's not real." Footsteps moved closer towards the boy. He unconsciously moved further into the stone, rugged wall. With no windows, it was practically pitch black in the room with the exception of the blue electricity in Timcanpy's restraints.
"When were awake, others tell us to follow our dreams. I don't know if it's that easy. You can't just make something you want become real. No one tells us how." The voice paused, then said:
"What is your dream, Allen?" The boy stopped cowering away from the figure. They said his name. Not 'Noah.' Not 'The Fourteenth.' Allen. Their tone was void of uncertainty and detest.
'I'm so stupid.' Allen knew this person. He trusted this person. They had never wronged him, nor betrayed him once. And he felt he had done the same in return.
"Lavi. Why are you here?" He hadn't meant for it to be anything but a simple question, but came out almost forceful. Lavi laughed at this.
"I don't need a reason to come see a friend do I? Besides, I don't care what they say." Lavi moved and made to sit by Allen on the damp stone floor. Allen looked away from Lavi, despite the lack of sight.
"How did you even get in here? Isn't the door under lock and key?" Allen questioned, the bitterness gone from his voice. Instead, there was a hint of…there wasn't a word for what Lavi heard, besides 'empty.' Hopeless.
"Yeah, Lvellie is pretty strict about who gets through the door. But you forget, I'm a bookman. We're resourceful," the older boy explained, his usual playfulness and a little bit of over confidence showing through his words.
"So, what is your dream Allen."
"You were serious about that?" Allen asked, surprised. He hadn't taken the other seriously.
"You bet I am. You tell me yours, and I'll tell you mine." The younger boy nodded silently in agreement.
"It used to seem so silly. Almost childish. But I would have to say," Allen pondered for the right words. He found them; "A family. Nothing perfect, just people who I can trust and who can trust me."
"Now I'll tell you mine," Lavi started.
"My dream is to make connections, memories with you, Lenalee, Komui. Heck, even Kanda!" They both laughed a little. Lavi continued.
"Everyone. And I want to be able to become a bookman like the Old Panda one day too, without constantly worrying about the stupid code of Bookman that forbid us from becoming attached to other people."
Lavi had never really opened up to the others really. Allen thought this, but realized he hadn't much either.
"I think I made my dream real." Allen let a small, sad grin take his lips.
"But I think I lost it. What's most pathetic is the fact that I don't even know."
"The Black Order?" the other asked, receiving a nod.
"I thought that I would always have a family here; with you, Lenalee, Jerry, Kanda, Miranda, Komui, even Fou and Bak. Everyone."
"I don't know if I would say that," Lavi said in reply.
"How do you mean?" Allen turned towards his friend's direction.
"I like to think that everything will be sorted out soon. If not soon, then later. But this whole predicament that were all in, I don't believe it will last forever. And Allen?"
The younger met the others eyes as best he could in the dark.
"We haven't given up yet. Not all of us. Were still behind you, ready to help you when the opportunity presents itself. You're still 'Allen Walker.' Don't let anyone tell you different." Lavi was solemn. He made it clear he spoke sincerely.
"Thank you." Allen was on the brink of letting go of all existent hope that maybe he could still be himself. The Usagi had reinstalled this simple fact again for him.
"Anytime, Allen. Anytime." Lavi stood, stretching a bit in the process.
"I hate to say it, but I should probably get going before Lvellie figures out that I lied to his face about coming in here for other reasons." Before closing the door behind him, Lavi stopped.
"I promise we will figure this mess out. We will. So just hold on a little longer. You're not alone."
The door shut gently, and a click signifying the lock falling in place could be heard. Allen was alone with Timcanpy again. But it wasn't the same as before. He still couldn't help but doubt that anything would get better or return to the way it was. For now however, the boy had more hope than he did.
And that was enough for the time being.