Here's another story guys! This one will be more organized don't worry.

I'd like to thank my beta reader: Brookie cookie17. :)

BLAME ME.

Listen to my story

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My baby girl lets go of my hand to go onto the stage. I had rented a large auditorium for her twelve birthday party. The dancers had already performed…my old band performed too. It didn't sound the same, not since he died. I sit back into the chair and listen to her voice speak on the microphone, people were already leaving.

"Um guys, I'd like to read something to you please. It's a very special birthday present. Can everyone sit down?" She twirls her hair nervously. She was never a good public speaker, however when she did everyone made sure they'd listen because she was just too innocent to ignore.

"Thank you. Ah, daddy? Could you come up here with Uncle Hiroki and Nowaki?" She smiles brightly. I have no choice but to obey her wishes, so I walk sluggishly up the stairs and smile for her. She grabs my hand and leads me to a chair that was on the stage. She did the same with Nowaki and Hiroki.

"What's up sugarplum?" Nowaki says, he sticks his tongue out when he sees Hiroki roll his eyes. I scoff.

"I read this," She looks at us sadly while her voice boomed through the auditorium.

"Is it one of Akihiko's books?" Hiroki suddenly sat up. For god sakes Hiroki she isn't reading my porn books! I made sure that they stopped publishing.

"No, daddy doesn't write books anymore. Not since…" She trailed off, "It's Haruhiko's."

I sat up. That man, he murdered my daughter. He ruined our life! I hate him.

"Throw it out." I say harshly. My daughter looks at me and pouts, crossing her arms she turns back to the audience.

"I'm going to read it to all of you today, out loud," She looks at me evilly.

"Ah, he's here!" She suddenly yells.

In the back I hear a small, "Let go of me you bastard," but I don't think nothing of it. I want her to throw away the book badly. His name still leaves a bitter taste in my tongue. I realize after a few minutes just who the big buff men were hauling. It's my brother. Holy shit, It's my brother.

He looks at me and his eyes widen. He turns around to run away but the guards ram him to the ground.

"I'm missing my damn flight you jack ass!" He yells and gets back up again. Juliana just smiles warmly as if she's known the man her whole life. So Misaki like, I think to myself.

"I'm going to read your story out loud in front of daddy and his friends. Okay?" Juliana said. Haruhiko paled.

"N-No…t-that…how did you get it anyway? I made sure I threw it out." He stopped struggling against the guards hold.

"You drove by my house while you were drunk and threw it at my window." Juliana said emotionless. His face became red with embarrassment.

"Don't read it." He says more sternly. "Please."

Nowaki gasped. Never in my life had I heard Haruhiko say please. Juliana looks at him with tears in her eyes as I growl in confusion.

"I already did." Haruhiko fell to his knees.

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry," He says while wiping the tears from his eyes.

"I never blamed you. I'm sure Rosie wouldn't either." This time all of us gasped. What had my brother told Julie? She was never supposed to know she had a twin.

"Don't-" Haruhiko was thrown into the chair by the security guard.

"I understand all of it and I want them," She points to me and her uncles, "To understand too."

She looks at him for permission. "Okay, but after this I'm going to leave."

"I understand."

And then she opens her mouth and reads:

I remember it like it was yesterday. The day your papa died, Julia. It was a terrible day and I hope when you read this you'll understand why your daddy cries at night or why sometimes we have to rush him to the hospital due to over-drinking. I want you to know that I've always been there watching out for you and your father in the side lines. That's where I belong, in the sidelines. I don't deserve to be anywhere Isaka isn't.

You see, your parents have gone through hardships Julia, please understand, that without your papa your daddy can't live…he really can't. Which is why you have Hiroki and Nowaki there at the house. Now don't be confused, your papa loved you and your daddy loves you and it's not your fault. He's trying hard to smile when your there and I know you notice something's wrong with him and you ask yourself 'why don't I have a mommy?"

Juliana, you don't have a mom you have…or had…two dads. You know, when you were a baby, your papa would sing to you and your daddy would play his guitar. I know this because I would get so depressed by myself I'd sit outside your daddy's door and just listen. Listen to the laughs that came out of both their mouths. It was beautiful. They were beautiful. If your daddy were in his right mind then he'd tell you all sorts of stories of how I wanted to steal everything beautiful from him, he'd tell you to stay away from me.

Don't. I'm not the man I used to be, back then I was jealous of what your daddy had. I wanted your papa for myself because he was, dare I say, my brother's property. Anyway, I planned to give this to you for your sixteenth birthday but I have to give it to you sooner. Some of this you won't understand, since you're only twelve, but most of it you will. So you know, just like I do, that your fathers went through all this pain so you would be able to breathe. They love you Julia, as do I.

Juliana, you need to understand that no one asked for my story. No one asked for my thoughts. No one asked me if I was okay. I lost someone important too…but no one really cared. No one came to the waiting room with me, to hold my hand, they were occupied with you and your sisters birth. I think…at that moment I hated you. I hated you with everything I had and I'm sorry. I don't hate you anymore, I know it was part of my grief. It was something that I had to deal with…I was to blame for your sisters death and my lover's death because I was the one who left the door unlocked that day. You should blame me…I wouldn't think less of you if you blamed me. As for your papa's death, the blame goes onto the drunk driver who hit him.

Still, blame me for that too…because I wasn't there to protect him, or I asked him to buy some lemons for Isaka, or I told him to just hurry home for Akihiko since they didn't have lemons. I understand and I accept if you blame me…it's easier because you don't know me. The hard part is knowing someone and blaming them…thank god I don't really know myself right?

I know I'm running away from everyone but I can't take the pain of seeing my precious brother breaking down because of my carelessness. I plan on going to where Isaka's grave is, in Japan, and sitting there until I rot. I really can't live without him. Plus it's not like your daddy will miss me or anyone else for that matter. Understand that I just want to be with the one I love again. Akihiko would understand but I know he hates me. I hate myself.

But you're the only one that will listen to what I have to say…I think. You are Misaki's kid so you should be able to listen with your heart.

Listen to my story Julia.