No Concern Unwarranted
Hugh knew immediately from the sound of Cadet Tilly's voice that something bad had happened. And he knew it had to be Paul. His heart almost stopped at the sight of his love, writhing in pain and bleeding. Why couldn't he listen? Added scene to "Choose Your Pain", 1x05.
By Emiliana Keladry
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek Discovery. I'm just playing with it. The world needs more Hugh/Paul.
Author's note: I'm not a doctor, so please forgive any medical mistakes. I really thought that the episode needed more of an adorable moment between Hugh and Paul, along with a serious scene of Hugh finding out what Paul did in the spore chamber. Enjoy!
"Black alert."
Doctor Hugh Culber listened as the alert went out over the comm system. He knew if Paul managed to get the tardigrade able to jump, it would've killed the creature. The look Hugh had shared with Paul on the Bridge, it should've let him know that he wouldn't forgive him if he did this to an innocent creature, but Paul did it anyway. He was too stubborn at times. Hugh knew Paul was trying to follow the orders of Acting-Captain Saru, but if it came at the cost of the life of the tardigrade, then it was too much. Hugh shook his head, holding onto the edge of his station. The ship shuddered as it jumped. He forced himself to focus on the bio-readings from the last crewman physical in his queue and not on what was probably happening in Engineering.
"Transporter room to Sickbay, Captain Lorca is aboard the ship and in need of medical assistance, along with another member of Starfleet," a voice called.
"Sickbay," the CMO answered. "Beam them to biobed one and two."
Hugh stood at attention, waiting for the two to arrive. The transporter beam deposited them on the bio-beds. The CMO went to work, examining Lorca as he protested that he was okay, despite the blood smeared on his face and the way he protected his midsection from touch.
Hugh stepped over to the newcomer. Sweat dripped from his long brown hair and there was a sense of panic in his gaze as he looked around. His face was unshaven; his cheeks were shallow. The man swallowed and laid back on the biobed as Hugh approached. It was clear he'd been beaten and most likely tortured by the Klingons.
"I'm Doctor Culber. What's your name?" Hugh waited to type the name into the PADD, hoping it would pull up the man's medical records from the Starfleet database.
"Tyler. Lieutenant Ash Tyler," he answered, looking a little more assured when he spoke his name aloud.
"Are you experiencing any pain?" Hugh looked up at the monitor as the biobed scanned him and displayed his readings. He was right to assume the Lieutenant was malnourished, previous signs of joints being dislocated and repaired crudely, deep scars, and a bacterial infection he must've picked up that was displaying as a low fever and most likely some nausea. They could treat the physical issues, but it would take a long time to recover emotionally. One of the worst casualties of war was the emotional scars left behind.
Tyler started to answer, but stopped as the comm interrupted him.
"Engineering to Sickbay!" Hugh recognized the panicked voice as Cadet Tilly. He could hear the tremble in her voice and the unease. Something bad had happened. It had to be Paul. His heart raced as he waited for her to speak again. Someone spoke quickly in the background, but he couldn't catch the words. "We – we have an emergency in the spore drive control room."
Paul.
"Sickbay, what's the emergency?" Hugh responded, trying to remain calm.
"There's been an… incident involving Lieutenant Stamets," Saru answered. "We are in need of medical assistance."
"I don't feel so good now." Paul's voice slurred, but the communicator picked it up. A high pitched giggle followed his complaint. Something definitely was wrong. Paul didn't giggle.
Hugh looked at the CMO for assistance, but he was focused on Captain Lorca. They briefly caught eyes and the CMO nodded. Okay. He could handle this in a professional manner. "Beam him to biobed –"
"It is unclear if it's possible to transport Lieutenant Stamets at this time," Saru interrupted.
What the hell happened? Hugh heard a loud groan in the background and Tilly's voice, saying something in a soothing tone. Paul. He giggled again, but it quickly turned into a moan. Hugh felt physically ill from concern and he wanted to run to Engineering to find out what was wrong with his love.
"Keep him still."
"Doctor Culber, go. Take Nurse Leilani," the CMO ordered. "I can take care of things here."
He didn't have to ask him twice. "Excuse me, Lieutenant Tyler. I'm sorry. There's an emergency I must attend to. I'll be back." Hugh grabbed an emergency med kit.
Nurse Leilani, a petite brunette with a soft voice, grabbed the hoverbed and waited at the door for him. She was one of the best nurses on the ship. Hugh was grateful she was on duty. He liked working with her and she was very good at her job. Hugh motioned for her to follow him.
The short trip across the ship felt too long. Leilani barely managed to keep up with him, but she didn't bother asking him to slow down. Hugh rushed into Engineering as the doors slid open. The first thing he saw was Saru and Tilly crammed into the spore drive control room. In-between them, Paul lay on the floor of the chamber.
"Please clear the chamber," Hugh ordered. He knelt down and opened his med kit, grabbing the tricorder.
Saru and Tilly exited the chamber, letting Hugh see the full extent of Paul's injuries. Blood came sluggishly from four puncture wounds, two on each side of his chest. His face was contorted in pain as he let out soft groans and moved as if he couldn't get comfortable. A hypospray lay next to him, but Hugh had no idea how it correlated with the situation.
Paul's eyes popped opened as Hugh touched his shoulder. "Hugh. I knew you'd come." He coughed and giggled once again.
"Oh Paul." Hugh touched his cheek, but only for a second. He turned on the tricorder and started scanning him.
"I'm sorry," Paul whispered.
Immediately, the readings started to come through. His heartrate was elevated, but his blood pressure was low. There was something else. He detected something strange in his blood. It was familiar, but only just. "What happened?" Hugh asked, barely managing to keep a professional tone.
"He – he – injected himself with the tardigrade DNA compound. He used it on himself so he could make the ship jump. He was unconscious when we found him and then – he started laughing." Tilly wrung her hands nervously. "I'm so sorry."
It made sense now why Saru didn't want him to beam Paul to Sickbay. They didn't know if the transporter would harm Paul after what he did. Eugenics experimentation, especially on humans, was forbidden and had been banned for years. What had Paul done to himself? Hugh knew very little about eugenics and filed away the information from Tilly, intending to have her assist. This wasn't the time to focus on what Paul did, but on how to help him.
Paul groaned and started coughing. He put one hand on his chest, touching one of the puncture wounds and getting blood on his fingertips. He gasped at the pain.
"Shh, it's okay." Hugh kept his voice low.
"Hurts," he hissed. Paul tried to sit up, but Hugh kept him down by placing a hand lightly on his chest. He coughed again, as a sucking sound came from his mouth.
The tricorder registered it as the same time as Hugh realized what was happening. "Air is leaking into your chest cavity and compressing your lungs. It's making it harder to inflate your lungs. Just focus on breathing and listen to my voice." Two of the puncture wounds had pierced his thoracic cavity and punctured his lung, letting air leak into the pleural space. It would become serious very quickly with his already weakened state.
Paul grabbed at the hand on his chest, digging his fingernails into Hugh's skin as he writhed in pain.
"I can't give you anything at the moment. I don't know how it will affect the compound in your system." Hugh hated his own words. There was nothing he could do until he got to Sickbay. "Nurse Leilani, prepare the hoverbed. We need to move him immediately."
"Can I be of assistance?" Saru asked, taking a step closer to the chamber.
As much as Hugh wanted to tell him to mind his own fucking business and step back, he knew it would be quicker. He wanted to be the one to protect Paul, but at this moment he couldn't. Hugh nodded, unable to form a sentence. Saru tenderly lifted Paul off of the floor and carried him to the hoverbed. Paul cried out. It physically pained Hugh as he listened and couldn't do anything to ease his pain yet. The exertion of the yell caused Paul to cough and cough. Hugh put a hand on his shoulder again, letting him know he was there for him. Paul barely nodded as he greedily sucked in another breath. His skin appeared even paler than normal.
"Hugh," Paul gasped.
The trip to Sickbay was faster. Nurse Leilani shouted out Paul's stats as they dropped and they moved as fast as possible to Sickbay. Saru and Tilly followed them, to which he didn't object. Hugh needed more information on the tardigrade compound and he suspected Tilly knew that information. When they entered Sickbay, the CMO was still working on Captain Lorca. Two of the nurses helped transfer Paul to biobed three. Paul cried out again. His hand reached for Hugh, but he wasn't close enough. Paul let out a raspy tight breath as his eyes found Hugh. An alarm went off on the biobed. Hugh turned it off, knowing it was Paul's oxygen levels.
"Dermal regenerator," Nurse Leilani said, handing him the instrument without prompting.
"I'll need a 14 gauge bore needle with tube."
"Yes, Doctor."
Hugh removed Paul's uniform top and undershirt, revealing the slow bleeding wounds. The bio-scanner told him which of the puncture wounds had pierced his chest cavity, the two on his right side. His lung was collapsing as the air compressed his lung. Paul coughed and tried to sit up. Hugh formed a sterile field around the biobed as Nurse Leilani brought him the needle. It shimmered around them.
"I need to remove the pressure and release the air." Hugh touched Paul's cheek, but he didn't respond to him. He continued to gasp and squirm. "Paul, please. I'm trying to help you."
He still didn't answer. Hugh turned his attention to Tilly, who was standing close by. He glanced over and saw moisture in her eyes, unshed tears for the man they both cared about.
"I'm going to insert a needle into his chest and it's going to be painful." Hugh barely managed to keep his voice even. "I need to give him something, but I need to know more information about what he did to himself in that chamber."
Cadet Tilly stuttered as she talked about the compound Paul had made from the tardigrade's DNA. It was complex, but he didn't think it would hurt Paul more if he administered an analgesic. "I'm sorry," she finished.
"It's not your fault. I'm not going to blame anyone, but thank you."
Hugh returned his attention to his patient. Nurse Leilani sterilized his hands by running the wand over them. Hugh administered a low dose of a pain reliever that he knew Paul wasn't sensitive to. This wasn't going to be pleasant. Despite all of their technology, sometimes an older method was more affective at solving a medical emergency quickly. Hugh uncapped the needle. He activated an immobilizing field to keep Paul still.
"Paul, I'm right here. I need to give you an injection. Even though I gave you some pain medicine, it's still going to hurt."
Paul's blue eyes were red and wet. Hugh grabbed his hand as Paul reached out. He tried to speak, but couldn't. Paul shook his head and tried again. "I – I trust you."
That was all he needed. Hugh released his hand and put his hands on Paul's chest, finding the midclavicular line in the second intercostal space. He jabbed the needle into the space. Paul grunted and tried to move. Out of the corner of his eye, Hugh saw Tilly turn around. The tears flowed freely now. Hugh pulled the needle out, leaving in the clear cap. Air hissed from the wound. Paul moaned and coughed. After a few minutes, the air slowed and he started to breathe easier. Hugh closed the cap and waited for Paul to settle. He removed the point, covering it quickly and sealing it off with the dermal regenerator. Hugh worked to heal the puncture wounds to prevent air from getting back in. Paul's eyes remained closed, but the scanner said he was awake.
"Hugh," he whispered. "I'm sorry."
"I know."
Hugh cleaned the blood from Paul's side, making sure there were no other injuries and that he was okay. Nurse Leilani went to work with the dermal regenerator on Paul's left side, tenderly touching his side. Hugh valued her immensely at this moment. Paul's heartrate had gone down, but his pain indicators were still elevated. Hugh took a blood sample to take to the lab and analyze the compound in his system. He also inserted an IV to push fluids. Paul was a little dehydrated. When he was working on something, eating and drinking wasn't always a priority, other than coffee with too much sugar. Having finished the IV and hung the fluids, Hugh stepped out of the sterile field.
Tilly took a step back as she looked at the splatters of blood on the front of Hugh's white uniform. Paul's blood. "Is he going to be okay?"
"He's stable at the moment. I will need all information and files you have on the tardigrade compound in order to treat him properly."
"Of course, Doctor Culber."
Hugh ran a hand across his face, releasing a little of the stress in his body. Paul was stable. He'd need to remain in Sickbay for a few hours for observation and he'd need to study the effects of what Paul injected himself with.
"What happened to Lieutenant Stamets?" Captain Lorca asked from his bed.
"It'll be in my report." Hugh held his gaze, not wavering. He was NOT going to justify Paul's actions or speak about what happened right now.
Lorca opened his mouth.
"In my report," Hugh repeated.
"Captain, I can give you a brief update on how we discovered your location," Saru interrupted.
The captain leaned back. "Fine, Lieutenant."
Tilly mumbled something about files and rushed from Sickbay as Saru went to speak quietly to Captain Lorca. Hugh made a mental note to check in with Tilly and make sure she was okay later. He didn't mean to snap at her, but worrying about Paul tended to cloud his judgement at times. She was a bit eccentric, but Paul liked her and he thought highly of her. Hugh knew he should check on Lieutenant Tyler, but he didn't want to leave Paul just yet. The CMO seemed to sense his reluctance and headed to check on their other patient. Nurse Leilani raised the privacy screen around Paul's bed. Hugh looked away.
What had he been thinking? Why would he inject himself with an alien compound? Paul was reckless at times, but he had to have a reason. Hugh walked over to Lieutenant Tyler's bed to distract himself.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I want to apologize for leaving like that," Hugh said, tucking his hands behind his back.
Lieutenant Tyler nodded. His face was no longer flushed and his heartrate was lower. "No problem. Is he going to be okay?" He gestured in Paul's direction.
"He'll recover." Hugh forced a smile on his face. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm better now." It was the same forced smile Hugh had. Tyler wasn't going to be okay just yet.
The privacy screen disappeared. Nurse Leilani had dressed Paul in sickbay pajamas, but left his shirt off so Hugh had access to his chest.
Hugh glanced back at Tyler. "If there's anything you need, don't hesitate to ask. I'll give you some privacy now." He left the CMO to complete the medical evaluation of the lieutenant.
Nurse Leilani came over to Hugh before he made it to Paul's bed. "He's awake, but he's very tired. You might want to leave that talk for later."
"Thank you," Hugh whispered.
"Anything, Doctor Culber." She winked and went over to help the CMO.
Paul didn't look at him as he approached the biobed. Hugh looked up at his vitals, noting they had started to balance out. His oxygen levels fluctuated, but not enough to worry him yet. Nurse Leilani had cleaned the rest of the blood from Paul's sides and wiped the beads of sweat from his face. Paul shivered slightly. He hated to be cold. Hugh frequently found Paul's cold toes against his legs in the middle of the night because he refused to sleep wearing socks. One wouldn't know by looking at him, but Paul loved to cuddle. Hugh stepped over to the nearest supply cupboard and pulled out a blanket. He carefully covered Paul, making sure it covered his chest to keep him warm.
"Thank you," Paul whispered, snuggling into the material.
Hugh nodded.
"Are you okay?" Paul asked.
"Why wouldn't I be? I'm okay." Tension crept back into his voice. He tried to force his expression to be neutral. "How's the pain?"
"It's not bad. Hugh –"
"I'm going to give you a little more painkiller and something to help you relax. You'll be here for a couple hours for observation."
Paul opened his mouth to say something else, but stopped. This wasn't the place to have a personal conversation. While most of the staff in Sickbay knew about their relationship, Paul and Hugh were private. Hugh administered the hypospray.
"Hugh." Paul's soft voice pulled at his heart.
Hugh squeezed his hand lightly, but didn't look at him. As soon as he fell asleep, Hugh let go. Before stepping away, he leaned down and gently pressed his lips to Paul's head. "Don't do that to me again," he muttered. "I love you."
He turned around and saw Cadet Tilly standing by the door to Sickbay. She held a PADD in her hand as she stared at the floor. Hugh silently walked over to her.
"I have the information you requested. It's not a lot, but hopefully it helps," Tilly blurted out.
"Thank you, Tilly. I also wanted to apologize for being rash with you. It's not your fault that my partner doesn't always listen to others. He's very impulsive."
Tilly made eye contact and he saw the red puffiness beneath her eyes. She'd cried tears for Paul. "He is, but he – he saved all of us. He knew we all could've died and he took the place of the tardigrade. It was probably stupid, but it was kinda brave. Please don't be mad at him."
Hugh's gaze softened at her words. "You're right. Thank you."
"I'll let you get back to him. I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop him."
"He probably wouldn't have listened to you," Hugh stated.
"I know, but I would've tried."
He smiled at her as she quickly retreated from the room. Hugh walked back to Paul's bed and sighed. They had a lot to talk about, but right now, he needed Paul to get better. The sounds of Paul crying out in pain would haunt him for a while. But he was going to be okay. He had to be.
Hugh and the CMO agreed to discharge Paul, as long as Hugh promised to bring him in if anything changed. The CMO put Paul's direct care in his hands, along with studying the effects of the tardigrade DNA compound. The two didn't say anything as they walked back to their quarters. Hugh knew it was bugging Paul that he wasn't talking, but he needed time to collect his thoughts. Paul immediately went to change into his pajamas in the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Hugh did the same in the bedroom. He sat down on the bed and ran his hands over his face. He needed a shower and at least ten hours of sleep, but that was a luxury he didn't have right now.
The bathroom door slid open, but Paul didn't step out. Hugh heard the water running in the sink. He stepped into the bathroom with his tricorder. Paul had both hands on the sink with his head down. He was still pale and the medicine in his system was making him feel tired, along with what happened in Engineering. Hugh still wanted to hear the full explanation. Paul grabbed his toothbrush and started brushing his teeth. Stepping up beside him, Hugh scanned him, making sure that there was nothing wrong. He needed the confirmation to ease his nerves.
"Stop," Paul muttered around his toothbrush.
"Stop what?" Hugh couldn't keep the irritation from his voice.
"Stop worrying." Paul raised his eyebrows slightly. "Stop doctoring."
Like he had a right to tell him to stop worrying when a few hours ago, Paul had been bleeding and gasping as his lung collapsed? His vitals hadn't changed. They still were off slightly, but they were stable. Paul wasn't dying at the moment. Hugh sighed and lowered the scanner. "Well, one tends to worry when they're doomed to love a brilliant but reckless maniac who's willing to risk his life for glory."
"The Captain was in danger." His answer was simple, but wrong.
Really? It wasn't that long ago that he said he hated Lorca and how he wished he'd never met him. Paul wasn't a soldier. Hugh grabbed his own toothbrush to keep himself from reaching out and shaking the stupidity out of him. "Captains are in danger every day."
Paul pulled his toothbrush out of his mouth and took a good look at Hugh. "You were in danger." His voice was steady, but Hugh could hear the emotion behind his words.
Hugh looked away from him, still wanting to be mad at him, but it was getting hard. He knew Paul cared about him. He just didn't always articulate it. Worry was a mutual emotion between them; it was the nature of their careers.
"I've spent my entire career trying to grasp the essence of mycelium. Now for the first time, I do. I saw the network. An entire universe of possibilities, I never dreamed existed. It's… unspeakably beautiful." Paul paused. Hugh wanted to forgive him, but he looked away and went back to brushing his teeth. "I also knew you'd leave me if I let anything else endanger that creature."
Hugh almost dropped his brush as he turned to look at Paul. "Oh. So you do listen to me?"
"Not really. You sold that with a look."
"Don't do anything that stupid ever again." Hugh turned to face him. He needed Paul to understand this to and to feel how he felt. "You may not care about you," he said, taking Paul's hand. "But I do." He lifted his left hand and tenderly rubbed Paul's shoulder. Hugh ran his fingers through Paul's blond hair and touched his cheek as he leaned into the touch. "You sure you feel okay?"
"Yes, dear doctor. I feel okay." Paul gave him a timid smile.
Hugh allowed his hand to drop. "Okay."
He didn't wait for Paul to say anything else, but headed into the bedroom. He pulled back the blanket on his side of the bed and lay down. Paul came out of the bathroom a moment later. He didn't say anything as he crawled into bed. Hugh opened his PADD and started analyzing the blood sample he'd taken earlier. He opened the research file Tilly had given him, so he could compare them. Paul scooted closer to the middle of the bed. He tucked his pillow under his arm so he was propped up a little.
"You're still angry."
Hugh dropped the PADD onto his chest and turned to look at his partner. "I'm not angry. I'm worried about you. I don't want to lose you."
"I don't want to lose you either. You're my world, Hugh."
Hugh touched the side of Paul's face. "Same. You know I love you, right?"
"Yes. And I love you too."
"I love you, even when you make me worry."
Paul had the computer dim the lights. He snuggled up against Hugh's chest after stealing his PADD and putting it on his nightstand. "If this works, I could actually control the jumps. I could continue to be a part of the network. We might need to find a different way to connect me to the spore drive that isn't so painful though."
"True. I'll have to see what we can do. But I don't want to think about that right now." Hugh pressed his forehead to Paul's. "I need this."
Paul gently grabbed his chin and turned it so he could kiss him, hesitating to pull away as their warm breaths mixed and he could feel Hugh's pulse beneath his fingertips. Hugh returned the kiss, deepening it by ever so slightly parting his lips. Paul groaned as Hugh pulled back.
"Not tonight. You're too tired and you need to rest," Hugh murmured.
"Okay." Paul grabbed his PADD from the nightstand and turned it on again. "Do you think we could do a little more reading?"
Hugh smiled and took the PADD. It was odd to some, but Paul loved it when Hugh read to him. He'd snuggle up and listen to him read for hours. It was soothing. "Just for a little bit. You need to get some sleep. Your body needs to heal more." He opened "The Lord of the Rings" and started where they left off. "Rauros roared on unchanging. The River had taken Boromir, son of Denethor, and he was not seen again in Minas Tirith, standing as he used to stand upon the White Tower in the morning. But in Gondor in after-days it long was said that the elven-boat rode the falls and the foaming pool, and bore him down through Osgiliath, and past the many mouths of Anduin, out into the Great Sea at night under the stars. For a while the three companions remained silent, gazing after him. Then Aragorn spoke. 'They will look for him from the White Tower', he said, 'but he will not return from mountain or from sea.'"
Hugh paused and looked to see Paul's expression. He smiled at the sight. Paul's lips were parted as he breathed evenly and free from pain. His hand rested on Hugh's chest, even in sleep. Hugh turned off his PADD and set it down. He pulled Paul closer to him and kissed the top of his head before drifting to sleep.
I hope you liked it! I really just needed a Hugh/Paul moment before the toothbrush scene that showed Hugh discovering what Paul did to save them. :)
Sorry for not using a name for the CMO. Discovery hasn't given us a name for the CMO, other than saying that Hugh isn't him.
Also, the quote is from "The Lord of the Rings" by J.R.R. Tolkien, page 417 (ebook, The Two Towers).
Thanks!
Emma