Maybe it was because Artemis had been a planned child, while she had been a 'surprise.' Or maybe it was because when she had been a smart-talking, rebellious 4-year-old, Artemis had been a bundle of smiles. Or maybe it was simply because Artemis looked like him, with blonde hair and Caucasian features, while she displayed no trace of her French heritage.
Whatever the reason, Jade always knew that she would never be Lawrence Crock's favorite daughter. The fact that she hated her father didn't make it any less painful.
Sometimes, in a rare moment of fatherly pride, Lawrence would inadvertently blurt out, "Good job, baby girl," when Artemis excelled at an assignment. Jade always excelled at her assignments, but was never given a compliment. She was never called 'baby girl,' either, only 'little girl' - and yes, there was a difference: one was a term of endearment, the other a term of belittlement.
It was also Lawrence who made Artemis the star of Alice in Wonderland. Paula had been reading the story to the sisters, when Lawrence came over and said, "You know, Alice reminds me of you, Artemis. A blonde girl always snooping around, discovering things she probably shouldn't - you stay out of my desk drawer, baby girl. I warned you once. Anyway, like Alice defeated the Queen of Hearts, you'll defeat the Queen of Justice someday - that is, Wonder Woman. You'll take her down."
Even when he was admonishing Artemis for invading his drawer, he ended up showing that he expected good things from his younger daughter. Jade wasn't sure what he expected from her. She chose the role of Cheshire for herself - fading in and out of view, wearing the fake smile of the cat because she didn't smile herself.
Her 13th birthday was the first 'family event' without their mother. It wasn't really a 'family event' anymore - Lawrence had spent the day away on an assignment, and she and Artemis had bleakly celebrated with a tea party and stale cupcakes.
Artemis' 9th birthday was a bit different. She and Artemis were having another tea party when Lawrence, who was never awkward about anything, awkwardly joined them. He put a cake in front of them. A real one. He opened and shut his mouth a few times, looking a bit lost, then simply said, "It's Devil's food. It's... good?"
Jade knew that Artemis didn't really like chocolate, but the birthday girl seemed to have forgotten this fact as she radiated sunshine with a smile bigger than the Cheshire cat's. "Thank you, dad!" she exclaimed.
"Artemis doesn't like chocolate, in case you don't remember," Jade snapped. Artemis kicked her under the table.
"No, Jade, it's you who doesn't like chocolate," Lawrence said pointedly. "Artemis tends to dislike what you dislike. She never had a problem with chocolate until you declared your hatred for it."
As Jade watched Artemis happily eat the cake, she wondered whether Lawrence had really been referring to chocolate, or to himself.
She hated Artemis. But then again, she didn't. Artemis was tough-as-nails on the outside, but was warm and kind on the inside.
Although Artemis was the younger of the two, it was Artemis who protected Jade from the worst of Lawrence's wrath. "Please, dad," Artemis would beg when Lawrence belittled Jade for being inadequate at something or another. "Jade knows she did wrong. She knows! You don't have to make it worse for her. Please?" Most of the time, this would cause Lawrence to gruffly sigh and walk away.
"Leave me alone," Jade would snap after Lawrence left. She would grit her teeth and try her best not to cry.
"Okay," Artemis would say glumly, and would leave Jade alone until she thought her older sister was asleep. Then, she'd crawl into Jade's bed and hug her tightly. And Jade would let her, because it was a small comfort to know that at least someone loved her. Jade would also cry, because she knew that another someone didn't love her at all.
The one thing Lawrence was completely fair about was training. If anything, he was harsher on Artemis, making the small girl fight against her stronger, smarter, and more experienced sister.
The punishment for failure was the same: a barrage of insults, several threats, a hundred push-ups, and two extra miles of running through the woods - with a carton of eggs, and not a single one should be broken at the end of the run. The only difference was that since Jade was older and stronger, she had to run five miles instead of two. It almost seemed fair, if there was anything fair at all about putting two children through training that a Marine would find difficult.
However, during one of their sparring matches, Artemis was less coordinated than usual. Jade hadn't thought much of it, and attacked as she normally did. The problem was that Artemis failed to block her and received the full force of her roundhouse kick - to the temple.
When Artemis flew to the ground, unconscious, Lawrence had been just as shocked as Jade was. After a stunned moment of horror, he rushed to Artemis' side and checked her vitals. "She's alive," he breathed, and Jade released the breath she didn't know she had been holding.
But after that, Lawrence had become furious. She had initially thought that he was mad at Artemis for failing. But he was mad at her, even though he tried to imply otherwise.
"You don't go easy on your kid sister, do you?" he asked, his tone deceptively calm. "That's good. What doesn't kill her will only make her tougher. And what doesn't kill youwill make you tougher, too. It's time for you to advance to the big leagues now, Jade. You'll fight me. And I won't go easy on you."
Jade woke up the next morning in her bed, but with no memory of climbing into it herself. She also had a bruise on her temple - the same spot where Artemis had a bruise.
Despite everything, Lawrence had never physically abused them before. But here it was. She thought it was retribution of sorts, for hurting his favorite daughter.
And that had been the last straw. Was she sick of the abuse - first verbal and now physical? Or was it that she was sick of Lawrence's twisted favoritism? She wasn't sure; most likely both. She packed up and left home that night.
As far as she was concerned, Jade Crock was dead. The girl who had hurt because her father didn't love her, the girl who had hurt because her mother was crippled and incarcerated, the girl who had hurt because she was forced to fight her little sister, was no more.
In her place was Jade Nguyen. Cheshire, the girl who didn't hurt because she didn't feel, the girl who didn't cry because her mask was eternally smiling, the girl who would become the deadliest assassin in the world. She was part of the big leagues now, just like Lawrence had wanted.
But deep inside, she knew that becoming the deadliest assassin wouldn't impress her father. Becoming the deadliest assassin wouldn't make her a daddy's girl. But it was okay. She didn't have to be a daddy's girl - she was her own girl.
In her world, her Wonderlessland, it was every girl for herself.