Francine woke up with a start. Something was squirming in her pants. "That's not my pet hamster," she thought. "Eugh, where am I?" she said out loud. She was in an unfamiliar room, in an unfamiliar bed.
It was a few moments before she realized she was on the lower level of a bunkbed. A fuzzy head appeared above her from the top bunk; crumbs fell onto her face from its gaping maw. Two long ears blocked the light. "Hey Francine, that was some party last night!" Buster shouted. "You were making out with everyone!"
Francine looked over to the other side of her bed and saw two eyes staring back at her. Francine groaned. "Not again," she thought. The two eyes were attached to two red braids. "Fool me once," the owner of the braids said.
"Shame on you. Fool me twice…FUCK ME!" Buster retreated and allowed more light to fall on the figure before Francine. "Oh all right," Francine said, rolling her eyes. "I'll get the strap-on."
Muffy smiled pleasantly.
The two made passionate love to the sounds of Buster crunching.
Afterwards, holding each other in their arms, they began to talk. "Francine, we can't keep doing this. I know that you have feelings for me."
Buster watched eagerly as he shoveled popcorn into his mouth.
"I'm tired of hiding, I want to show our love to the world, not hole up in Buster's room." "Well, what do you expect?" Francine asked incredulously. "You make me fuck you in the ass and then expect me to just…walk away from you?" She glanced at Buster before continuing. "And then you go on dates with Arthur, and tell me about them?"
"I think we both have to be brave," Muffy purred.
Buster loudly slurped his soup.
Francine allowed herself to relax in Muffy's embrace. "Just promise me one thing," she said cautiously. "If other people are going to know about us then…then you can't keep seeing Arthur."
Muffy pulled away quickly.
Buster choked on his quiche.
"What are you saying? You want me to give up the one boy who can give me what you can't? No offense sweetie, but I prefer the real deal. Maybe I was wrong, maybe you're too immature for a modern relationship. Don't you know that monogamy isn't realistic?"
Buster sucked his straw, he was done with his drink and was down to the ice.
Francine felt the heat rush into her cheeks. "No, no!" she said quickly, her voice beginning to quaver. The bed above them creaked as Buster repositioned himself and cracked open a few raw eggs. "I AM mature! I just…I guess I just don't want to share you. I'm sorry. I'm being selfish. You should just break up with me now."
Muffy stroked Francine's face lovingly. "Frankie, that's what you have to understand about me. Arthur can give me things you can't, but that doesn't mean I don't love you any less."
"Wait…love?" Francine asked, flabbergasted.
Buster chewed on his tart.
The bed creaked once more, louder this time. They looked up as Buster moaned miserably. He'd done it again; he'd eaten himself nearly to death. Francine knew what was coming, but as the panic settled over her, she found herself unable to move or speak. Muffy was still talking, seemingly unaware of what was to happen, but Francine couldn't hear her. There was a loud crack, and the bed came crashing down in a cascade of soup, milk, and crumbs.
"Oof, too many raw eggs," Buster groaned. He felt some things squirming beneath his massive gut. "That's not my pet hamster," he thought. He lay there for a moment contemplating the situation he'd gotten himself into. His room was in ruins. Splintered wood littered the floor amidst puddles of milk and soup. Something red was oozing out from beneath him. "Runny ketchup," he thought.
"ARTHUR!" he bellowed. "GET THE MOP!" Arthur emerged from the closet and peeled off his gimp suit.