'A calendar', Robbie frowns, 'like the bloody WI?' He glares at Moody across the table with genuine scepticism.
'It's for charity Robert and you need to set a good example.' Moody suggests.
'You want me to show myself in me birthday suit as a good example?' Robbie asks incredulously, watching as James smirks beside him.
'I never said naked, I said sexy and personal. You present your private passions in a senusal way to appeal to the public. We'll find a good interest for each of you.' Moody's smile is entirely disconcerting under the circumstances as is James' lack of objections to this insane scheme.
Just the e-mail from Moody informing them that the office would be doing a charity calendar in support of the refugee situation had Robbie concerned. The words 'Showing the world that coppers have private lives and sex appeal' in one sentence had Robbie's shackles up, though that might have more to do with his recent breakup with Laura and subsequent early return from New Zealand. Even if the split was amicable and they both agreed that there was no way they were going to work out long term any mention of the idea of himself as sexy or romantic just got him on edge right now.
'You send me an e-mail with your desired hobby to be featured and make sure it is something that can be made to look good… playing rugby, raising kittens that sort of thing.' Moody suggests and Robbie silently wonders if staying in the job is really worth this kind of humiliation.
'Breathe Robbie, it'll be fine' James says placing a gentle hand on his shoulder as they leave the office.
'You seem remarkably unmoved by all this. Didn't have you down as the take your kit off in front of an audience kind of guy.' Robbie growls.
'I have my Gibson and if she's not sexy enough I can borrow an electric guitar from an acquaintance. Everyone loves a rock star right?' James smiles and Robbie is thoroughly envious of his easy confidence. Of course the lad has the looks to pull something like this off. With his long legs, romantic disposition and bright blue eyes he could be the poster boy for any take your kit off project, or a 'be sexy without taking your kit off event, as apparently this was.
He's never actually seen James play his guitar so the idea of getting to watch the man in action was quite appealing. Maybe making a complete arse of himself would be worth it in order to finally get to see James display his prowess in front of an audience.
Well it would be if he had any kind of marketable talent. In the end Robbie finds he has nothing to report to Moody, he doesn't have any skill worth mentioning and his eventual e-mail is far more honest than he thinks Moody will ever realise when he asks if he can't just appear as a groupie in Hathaway's rock star photo shoot.
He receives a reply informing him that Hathaway's music angle is not happening as DI Lauren Williams will be covering the music angle. She plays the cello which is, according to Moody, a much sexier instrument than James' guitar. Robbie suspects that the reason why the cello is deemed more sexy has more to do with the fact that Williams has curves enough to match that cello of hers and Moody is obviously 110% straight.
The long and the short of the message however is Moody informing him that with the aid of a compliant Maddox, they have got hold of Lyn who has revealed that Robert Lewis is, thanks to his dead wife's demands, quite a skilled ballroom dancer.
The worst thing is that he can't even deny it. Val had dragged him to classes twice a week for the entire year preceding their wedding and at the end of it he hadn't even really minded because as Moody and Lyn suggested, it had turned out that he wasn't half bad at it.
He hates showing it off mind you, would do anything not to have to dance in public but that doesn't mean he doesn't secretly love it. He loves it enough that he finds himself wondering if DI Lovett who has been assigned as his dancing partner can actually dance or if he will be carrying her around the dance floor. It will never be the way it was with Val, but it could possibly be fun to dance again with a good partner.
He returns to the office significantly more cheerful which is quite the opposite of how James returns ten minutes later. Robbie suspects that it is the rejection of his rock star idea that is to blame for James' foul mood and he wonders what Moody might have found to torment James with.