Author's notes: AUGH. So. Welcome! This isn't a fic. that features any of the characters from the series, save for the special infected. I know it features fan-characters, but bear with me on this! It'll be ok I swear.

I wrote it more as a companion piece for a character I've been extensively roleplaying. There are a whole lot of mistakes that I've just corrected and I just found an editor so that should at least become less of a problem as we go along here! Chapters will be longer, I really do not like how goddamn short they are thus far. Feedback is appreciated as I'd love to know how I can improve.

I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I do writing it.

- BonBon

"What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped in his toe?"

"Roger, Can it wait?" The young woman muttered setting the textbook down and fixing her gray eyes onto the figure of the scrawny male before her. "I kinda want to get going with the studying here?" She pouted clearly getting extremely tired of his antics."The test is like…monday."

"No! No, I swear you'll like this one Beth. " The dorky blond in the Darwin t-shirt said, adjusting his glasses and sitting up in his chair. "Like its funny! I swear it is." He gestured wildly with his hands as he spoke as if he had to place emphasis on every little word he said.

"Ok," Beth said with a sigh, smoothing her reddish brown hair back behind her ears. Considering the light sandy roots that were coming in at her scalp the auburn colour was not natural by any means. "What did the cell say to her sister?" She asked, and bit her lip in preparation for Roger's inevitable corny answer, hands playing with the strings of her oversized hunter green University hoodie. The guy could never take anything seriously, but he was the only go to guy on campus if you needed last minute tutoring in anything from Biology to obscure literature from like the 17th century.

He grinned like an idiot before spouting off the answer "Mitosis!" Beth groaned and put her head in her hands, trying so hard not to laugh. She didn't want to encourage him. "So you get it right, 'ca-" She interrupted him before he could finish, lifting her head up to look at him with an exasperated expression "I get it because cell division yadda, yadda, yadda…can we move on here? I'd love to get this over with so I can go…"

She didn't actually hate him, she just felt uncomfortable around him. It was a conflicted sort of feeling actually. Not exactly hate but not exactly like. Beth had known him for two years now, she thought she'd be used to his brand of energy and weirdness but the truth was she was far from…that tolerant of him. He was just really nice, a little too nice half the time. She often wondered if he was like secretly creeping around campus spying in like the woman's dorm windows. He was a bit too chivalrous in a day and age where most guys were complete douchebags, He had to have an ulterior motive. There was no other alternative here.

"Oh, oh right..I'm sorry." He cleared his throat to indicate he was back on task and picked up the cola can beside him quietly sipping the contents before setting it back down with a light clink. "What term were we on?" he then asked and she was glad that they were finally resuming. She glanced at her paper and squinted, "Somatotype?" she read tapping her slippered foot against the floor. Roger kinda sat and twiddled his thumbs, his body slowly receding into the chair. "Ah," Roger said in understanding and grinned, "thats a classification for physique and body type. " he said cheerfully as Beth scoffed in reply, "I got that but I can't remember the actual types themselves... it's insanely difficult." The subject of biological anthropology was not her strong suit, she hated the fact the class was part of her studies. Why did the hardest things need to be mandatory?

"I'm surprised," mused Roger, "it's not hard if you use the people around you as a kinda stepping stone." he motioned to himself, " I'm an ectomorph," he giggled, "you can tell because I'm thin as a fucking rail and look like I haven't eaten a sandwich in a few days, Ectomorphs are built for endurance based sports like…cross country for example." She knew he was trying hard to simplify it for her and for that she was grateful. He continued, "Uh an ectomorph is slender and has a difficult time gaining weight." Beth mad a dismissive noise at his words, "Geeze, I wish I were an ectomorph." she muttered, grinningly slightly at her attempt at self deprecation. It was true she had a lot of curves, people liked to point it out in as rude a manner as was possible.

"You look fine," Roger said, his tone quite defensive, or so she assumed. She was sort of set out to loathe him so who knew how he truly meant it. Beth merely frowned, 'god he's such a creep' she thought, glowering at him from underneath her wavy mess of hair. He continued his little encouraging body positive spiel "I mean you are fairly typical for an mesomorphic female, you gain weight easy, but you also lose weight quickly so in truth… " his habit of gesturing as he talked really, really bothered her. "you are really quite normal!" good! He finally finished his mini-rant. Beth closed the textbook with a thud, "Is that the next term?" She muttered curtly, glaring at him from across the couch. "Err, yeah. Yeah it is…with the uh." he replied, glancing at the clock, "somatotypes." he muttered. Things got a bit awkward in the silence that followed.

Beth decided it was time to leave. She didn't like how that conversation went at all. Too much, too creepy, even if he meant well. Getting up she placed her textbook back into her backpack and gave a curt nod toward Roger as he stared up at her dumbly. "I'll be back later, I got things to do" she uttered trying to make the tone of contempt in her voice abundantly clear to the nerdy guy in the armchair. "Er, Yeah yeah!" he responded grinning, "Shoot me an email! I'm available most times."

She waved him off, rolling her eyes as she left the mostly barren rec. room. God almighty you had to have the patience of fucking iron to deal with Roger for more then five minutes.

Roger sat by himself completely and utterly confused. Social interaction was a bit hard for him but he managed well enough to at least function. It wasn't that he was bad at it, it was just that his wavelength was different from everyone else's save for his few close friends and family. When it came to people like Bethany, his wave never flowed with her's, it went in the opposite direction. He was aware she disliked him, he just didn't understand why. He always assumed it may have been about his breath, or maybe his joke? It didn't really matter to him the reason though, he was content just being himself. If other people didn't like it, it wasn't really up to him to decide for them! All he wanted to do was help people out if they needed it, Run around on the track, nerd out about comic books, and play around in the campus labs with his friends Leo and Tim. He didn't really ask for much in life.

Besides when it came to girls he had absolutely zero interest. Her behavior just served to completely perplex him and nothing more. Watching her back as she left he began to wonder if there was a biological reason for her cold behavior. Maybe a slight change in brain chemistry brought on by the stress of her classes, that his immature joking certainly did not help, caused some sort of…behavioral fluctuation?

Pssh, Nah, It wasn't up to him to think about things like that. He was a biologist, not a psychologist. He got up from the chair and picked up his heavy blue backpack from off the floor. Damn, He needed to empty it every once and awhile, it wasn't healthy to carry so much shit in one bag. Checking the clock, and adjusting his glasses he made his way to the glass door leading out onto the school's hallway. According to his schedule he had one more tutoring session and he was done.

Roger passed by a student mingling in the hall, barely paying attention to the man his arm just slightly brushed against his, but it seemed to be enough to knock him forward a little. "Oops! My bad!" he said, throwing his hands in front of him to show he meant no harm. The student turned to look at roger, skin pale, and almost gray in colour and eyes bloodshot as if he'd been hitting a joint recently. There was a distinct layer of sweat on the dude's face that glimmered when the artificial light from the hall way beamed down on it that indicated the guy was a little bit more then merely high.

Roger's eyes widened with immediate concern. "Oh…shit dude, you look like crap." said Roger sympathetically, motioning down the hall. "The nurse is down there! I don't know…How much help that would be." Roger drew his arms closer to himself and shrugged. The student said nothing in reply, just opening his mouth as if he meant too. "Look, I can help you get the-" A flood of black vomit seemed to stream from the student's mouth splashing upon the floor and staining Roger's red converses with a splattering of the stuff. Roger immediately backed off, a primal fear running up through his spine and causing his heart to beat frantically in his chest.

That wasn't normal. That was so far from normal.

The man let out a weird gargled growl and it was then that Roger knew it was best to leave. Flinging his backpack to the ground, he took off running as fast as he could.

Like fucking hell was he going to look back.