Clarke stares at Lexa's unmoving form.
Twelve hours have passed since she was shot.
Clarke had sent Titus to bring every healer at his disposal after he missed his intended target. Her own knowledge of modern medicine and the Grounder's expertise of herbal remedies had combined in a frantic attempt to remove the bullet and staunch the bleeding.
Now, she'd been left alone to wonder if her best efforts weren't enough.
The Commander lays still before her, the only indication of her vitality being the nearly imperceptible rise and fall of her abdomen.
She stares at the dressed wound, watching the ivory bandages slowly stain with Lexa's ebony blood.
Clarke leans forward in her chair- the guard had brought it in a few hours ago- and trails her hand down the brunette's arm. A corner of her mouth pulls into a weary smile as she sees goosebumps appear on the skin below her fingertips. The instinctual reaction is almost comical, given Lexa's current condition. This, and the full comprehension of the day's events, coaxes a hysterical chuckle to bubble out of her mouth. However, the manic laugh quickly morphs into a quiet sob. Clarke lifts her hand, covering her mouth in an attempt to stifle the subdued noise. Inhaling softly, she leans forward until her forehead rests on the bed. She watches as her own tears stain the cement floor a darker grey, letting out a long sigh once there's no moisture left. She wipes her face before speaking.
"I don't know if you can hear this," Clarke begins tremulously. "but I need you, Lexa."
She feels her resolve waver, but continues. "I thought I'd never forgive you for what you did. I let you in once, and you betrayed me." Clarke presses on. "I should've let you go then, Lexa. But I couldn't. I let my anger fester. After you dragged me here, I convinced myself that whatever there was between us had abandoned me on that mountain as well." She inhales sharply as the memories of the past few weeks wash over her. "You proved me wrong. Again. You managed to break past the resentment that had taken me months to build."
Clarke's voice softens. "I forgive you, Lexa," She starts, before her tone hardens into something resembling anger. "but that means you can't die. You hear me? You can't make me different and then leave."
She pauses before finishing.
"I love you." She whispers.
A prolonged silence follows her words. She can feel herself beginning to break again, before a hand brushes the side of her head.