Not Over You Chapter 1: Not Over You, a chicago fire fanfic

A/N: So this is an one-shot I did based on what happened in 3x14 (Call It Paradise). This is what I would have liked to see happen instead of Casey going home with that hoe, who just so happens to be married to their new chief. Like WTF Derek Haas! Never mind Casey screwing some married tramp, how about we get #Dawsey back together!

Anyway, enough of my rant... Sorry if I'm feeling a little... hostile, towards one of my favourite shows. Like I said, this is what I would have loved to see if Casey hadn't been an idiot. Please R&R and visit my other fic, Finally One Day. It's a collection of one-shots based off of Linstead (Chicago PD) and what I would love to see or would change based off of prompts and episodes.

Disclaimer: I, sadly, don't own Chicago Fire. I also do not own Gavin Degraw's Not Over You.

If you ask me how I'm doing, I would say I'm doing just fine. I would lie and say that you're not on my mind. But I go out, and I sit down at a table set for two, and finally I'm forced to face the truth. No matter what I say I'm not over you.

He couldn't believe that he had let her walk away from him. From them. He knew the minute she closed the door behind her he should have went after her, but he also wanted to respect her and even though he hated it, he wanted to give her the space she needed. At least that's what he was telling himself. The hole in the wall told other stories.

Severide coming home, seeing him fixing the hole he had made, and asking if this was really fair to him or not, was what had made him start questioning everything. Questioning his decision of letting her walk out, questioning why they didn't work things out, why they just couldn't seem to talk to each other anymore, and why he had let his professional job and decisions cloud his personal job and decisions as her fiancé.

When she found that baby outside and he got to see firsthand how she took care of a child, or would with their children one day (he hoped), he couldn't help the flood of love and affection he felt towards her. When he caught her looking at him while he held the little girl, a look of love and adoration in her eyes, he knew she still loved him but was cautious with giving her heart to him again. He could tell, just by the look in her eyes that what she wanted wasn't for them to have space and take a break, but for him to fight for her.

Yet, when Severide had suggested he 'get back out there' and stop pining after her, he had agreed. Sure it was only a half-hearted agreement – she still held the other part of his heart – but it had been an agreement. That was why when that girl had started paying attention to him at Molly's that night, he bought her a drink. But as the night wore on and he spent more time with this girl, who wasn't her, all he wanted was to go and apologize to the one person who he knew still held his heart completely. His girl.

That was how he found himself standing on Brett's doorstep. Before he had left Molly's he had found the blonde paramedic – who everyone knew looked like Shay – and asked if Gabby had gone home. That word felt so foreign in his mouth when referring to somewhere that wasn't their apartment. When Brett had told him she was, he could tell she knew why he was asking.

"Casey," she said, grabbing his arm as he turned to leave, "make sure she knows that you're sorry and still love her. That girl needs to hear it." Matt simply nodded to Brett and turned to leave, grabbing his jacket on the way out.

He took a few cleansing breaths and knocked on the door, praying that she was still there and hadn't gone to bed. He didn't have to wait long for an answer, because just as he was about to knock again, Gabby opened the door with a surprised look on her face.

Matt took a minute to take her in. She must have just been relaxing because she had opened the door in nothing but a pair of black leggings and one of his over-sized CFD sweatshirts he hadn't even known was missing. God she looks beautiful, he thought and pulling himself out of his thoughts when he saw her start speaking.

"Matt? What are you doing here?" Gabby asked, slightly taken aback to find him standing on Brett's – no her – doorstep.

"Sorry to barge in and interrupt what you were doing, but I was wondering if we could talk?" Matt asked hopefully, silently praying she wouldn't slam the door closed in his face.

"No you weren't interrupting, I was just getting ready to watch a movie. Come in," she replied, stepping to the side so that he could enter. The sharp intake of breath she took as he walked past her not escaping his notice.

"So what did you want to talk about?" she asked once they were settled on the couch, each holding a beer. His favourite brand, her mind pointed out when she saw the small smile cross his lips when he took it from her.

"Us," Matt simply said, looking up from the bottle in his hands to her eyes.

"Matt-" Gabby started.

"Can I maybe just say what I need to and then you can throw me out if you want to?" He cut her off, needing for her to hear him out. Gabby nodded. She wasn't sure what he meant by needing to talk about them, but she was willing to hear him out.

Matt took a deep breath before he began, setting his beer bottle on the coffee table in front of them and turning to face her more. "I know that when we had dinner the other night you asked that we take a break and try again later. And I respect that, but what I realized tonight – and that I should have realized a while ago – was that I don't want to take a break. I want you. I want you home with me, planning our wedding for next year and talking about the day we had, whether it was about work or just a day we spend laying on the couch. I realized that I should have fought for you, and that I should have found some way to make you stay. I realized that no matter what I tell people or try to tell myself, I am not over you. I know that I hadn't done what I should have when coming home from shift. I know that I didn't separate being your lieutenant from being your fiancé and I am so sorry for that. I just want you to know that I will do everything in my power to get you back, and I promise you I love you more than anything in the entire world and will spend every day for the rest of eternity trying to show you that, if that's what it takes to get you back."

Gabby was shocked. She knew that she still loved him so much and it tore her apart to walk away from him, but she also knew that he loved her with his entire heart and soul and he would do exactly as he said. He would fight for her. She wanted nothing more than to fall into his arms and stay wrapped in them for all eternity, but she was still nervous and skeptical about whether they would work this time or not.

"Matt, I believe that you want me to come home and that you will fight for me and love me, but how do we know that we won't end up like last time? How do we know that we can separate work life from our home life? We got into this whole mess because we couldn't have a simple conversation about our relationship or what we were feeling. Trust me, I want to come home. I want to be able to fall asleep in your arms every night and wake up with you every morning, but I'm scared that we won't be able to work through any problems or fights we may have."

Matt took in the pained expression on her face, and it practically shattered his heart. The one thing he had never wanted to do in this relationship with her was hurt her, and he had done exactly that. He slowly reached across the space separating them and placed his hand on her cheek. He felt her lean into his touch and saw the small smile grace her lips.

"I am so sorry Gabby. I never meant to hurt you or cause you this pain. I should have put aside the choices we both made and feelings I had after work and focus on being your fiancé. I promise you though, and you know I keep my promises, that we will work through everything. I promise you that we will talk about anything and everything, and I promise you that I will try every night and day to separate my feelings as best as I can. I love you so much and I want us to work. I want to marry you and have a family with you one day. Can you please forgive me and take me back? Can you please promise me that you can try and talk to me whenever times get rough?" Matt asked, slowly moving closer to her, never moving his hand from her cheek. At this moment, he just needed to have some form of contact with her.

"Matt," Gabby whispered, her eyes never leaving his, "I forgive you, as long as you can forgive me. I want to talk to you, and I want to try to talk to you when it's hard. I love you more than anything. Let me come home. I want to stay planning our wedding even if we can't have one now. I know I hurt you too and I know that I put my career before you, and that is something I never should have done. I'm so sorry, baby."

Matt finally knew that they were going to be okay. They would make it, even if they had some bumps in the road along the way, they would make it. Matt leaned in even more and gently brushed his lips against hers, each letting out a sigh at the feel; something they hadn't felt in a long time, rightness. As they pulled away and rested their foreheads on each other's, small smiles graced both of their faces.

Matt pulled away first, and framed Gabby's face with his hands. "Baby, you can come home whenever you want, all you have to do is say the word."

"Good. Now, would you like to stay the night and I can talk to Brett in the morning so I can come home tomorrow?" Gabby asked, staring into his deep blue eyes that always entranced her.

"I would love to," Matt replied, standing up and pulling Gabby up with him, relying on her to lead them to her room.

As they laid in bed together later that night, there was a sense of peace and contentment surrounding them and creating a bubble. Gabby laid on Matt's bare chest lightly tracing nonsensical patterns into his skin, while his arms rest around her running his hand up and down her bare back and arm. Matt leaned down and placed a kiss on top of her head, causing Gabby to let out a content sigh.

Matt, however, was the first one to break the silence with a small chuckle. "You know, today Severide saw us together with the baby. He came up to me after shift and told me it was time to move on and put myself back on the market."

Gabby propped herself up on her elbow and shot Matt a surprised look. She knew Kelly was looking after Matt since they were like brothers, but she was shocked that he would tell Matt to move on when it was obvious that they still loved each other.

"You know, I almost did too. There was this woman at Molly's who was openly flirting with me from across the bar. So, being a guy, I bought her a few drinks. But, as we sat there and talked and flirted, all I wanted was to be with you. It didn't matter where, just as long as it was you and me. That's what made me come here," Matt said, reaching his hand up and running it through Gabby's short, wavy locks, tucking a few pieces behind her ear.

Hearing that Kelly had told Matt to move on shocked her, but hearing that Matt almost had rocked her to her core. She knew that they hadn't been the best in the relationship department lately and had been 'taking a break' but it didn't make it hurt any less.

Seeing the look of hurt briefly cross her eyes, Matt's heart broke a little knowing that he had hurt her by even considering moving on. Turning her face so she was looking into his eyes, Matt knew he had to correct what he had said.

"Baby, not for a second did I ever think of going home with her or anything beyond talking and flirting. The only one I would ever want to take home from a bar is laying with me in bed now, and – if she still wants – is my fiancée. I love you, and only you, and I plan on showing you that for the rest of our lives and on into eternity. I promise you," Matt said, pulling her back into his chest and placing a light kiss on her forehead, instantly feeling the tension leave her with his words.

Gabby sighed again, and placed a kiss on Matt's chest right above his heart – subconsciously claiming it as hers. Because she knew it was. "I know, and I believe you. It's just the thought that Kelly could even suggest you moving on that baffles me. Could he not see how hung up on each other we were? I mean, I didn't want to admit it to anyone let alone myself, but we were pretty obvious. And may I say, when I get my hands on him, I am kicking his ass for even planting that idea into your head."

"Yea we were, and you have my full blessing to kiss his ass," Matt said, a soft smile crossing his face. He had never been more content than he was now, laying here with the love of his life, running his fingers through her hair and just enjoying the moment. Suddenly, another thought crossed his mind that seemed to make his smile grow.

"You know I meant it," he quietly said, returning his hand to running up and down her back.

"Meant what?" Gabby whispered back.

"That you would be a great mom. I guess in the back of my head I added a 'to our kids' to the end of it, but I meant it. You are going to make an amazing mother someday Gabby, and I hope that I can be the one to provide that for you. For us," Matt replied, his smile or ministrations never fading.

"Oh you know that it will be to our children that I will be a great mom. Just like you will be an amazing daddy to them too," Gabby said, looking up at Matt from her spot on his chest.

"Well, we have a few things to focus on first before we get to have those kids. First we need to move you home and make sure we are okay. Then we need to figure out a way for us to be able to work together and not have it effect this. Finally, we need to get through the next nine months of your candidacy so that we can announce our engagement and finally get married. How's that sound for a while?" Matt asked, leaning down and placing a soft kiss on her lips.

"That sounds absolutely perfect," Gabby replied. "And just so you know, I'm not over you either."

Matt smiled at her, and they both knew that they would be okay. They would work through the rest of their problems and make it work while they were on shift. They would find a way to talk to each other even when it was hard, and they would get married as soon as they were able to. Then they knew that they would have that family they had talked about, and they would have the perfect life together, for the rest of eternity. As long as they could face it together they would make it out stronger than ever, and they knew that no matter what, they would never be over each other.