Popular like Gwen
Hey guys random little bit of funniness, 2 songfic's combined... enjoy!
Ianto stood in front of the mirrored monument, studying his plain reflection. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
"Ianto?" He turned to see Gwen walk towards him. She was wearing her usual tight jeans and leather jacket.
"Hi Gwen."
"What's occurring?" She asked, pouting.
"It's nothing..." He turned his gaze back to the monument.
"Doesn't look like nothing. Come on, you've had a face like a slapped behind all day!" She nudged him playfully.
"It's just... don't you ever feel like a change?"
"A change?" She shrugged.
"Yeah..."
"What's really going on Ianto?" Gwen asked as the wind from the bay picked up. She wanted him to tell her quickly so she could offer a few comforting words and then go home to Rhys.
"It's Jack... I think he's getting bored of me." He thrust his hands into his pockets and kicked a stray pebble out from under his foot.
"Jack? What makes you think that?" She asked, trying to suppress a laugh.
"I don't know. I just think it's time for a change." He shrugged simply.
"You know what you need? A makeover."
"I'm not sure..."
"Ianto, now that we're friends, I've decided to make you my new project."
"You really don't have to do that..." Ianto feebly protested.
"I know." She simpered. "That's what makes me so nice." Joking she linked arms with Ianto and pulled him away from the bay. As they walked Gwen pointed out other people. "Whenever I see someone less fortunate than I, and let's face it, who isn't less fortunate than I?" She joked and Ianto laughed weakly. "And when someone, like you, needs a makeover I simply have to take over." Ianto tried to protest. "I know," she stopped him. "I know exactly what they need." Gwen saw the nervous look on Ianto's face and made an attempt to make him laugh. "And even in your case. Though it's the toughest case I've yet to face." He gave a throaty laugh and inspired, she continued. "Don't worry, I'm determined to succeed. Follow my lead." And with that she pulled him into the nearest clothes shop. After some rummaging along the clothes racks Gwen pulled out a printed tee shirt. "And yes indeed, you will be popular."
"I'm going to be popular?" Ianto asked, confused.
"Yes. I'll teach you the proper poise when you talk to boys, little ways to flirt and flounce." She flicked her hair over her shoulder in demonstration. She looked over his shoulder to see a shoe rack. "Oh! I'll show you what shoes to wear." She thrust a pair of red converse at him. "How to fix your hair." She raised an eyebrow and handed him a pot of hair gel. "I'll show you everything that really counts to be popular."
"Popular? You'll help me be popular?" He asked warily.
"You'll hang with the right cohorts; you'll be good at sports. Look at Owen for example. I'll teach you the slang you've got to know. So let's start because you've got an awfully long way to go." She propelled him towards the nearest changing cubicle.
"I'm really not sure about this Gwen." He called from the cubicle.
"Trust me, there's nobody wiser. Not when it comes to popular" She flung a pair of low hip jeans over the curtain to him. "I know about popular, and with an assist from me, to be who you'll be, instead of dreary who you were..." she looked him over. "Well are, there's nothing that can stop you from becoming popular." She took Ianto by the hand and led him to the next shop. After some more frantic searching amongst the rails and the occasional excited squee, Gwen pulled out a leather jacket.
"No way. You might be able to pull that off but I definitely can't." He argued.
"Yes you can... think of Tosh."
"What about Tosh?"
"Think of how shy she was at first. And her fashion sense. She would not be where she is today without my help. Think about it," she continued, ignoring him. "When I see depressing creatures with unprepossessing features, I remind them on their own behalf to think of celebrated heads of state or especially great communicators." Ianto made to interrupt but she continued. "Like Jack, did they have brains or knowledge?"
"Well actually..." Ianto was about to point out that Jack was indeed very knowledgeable on thing Gwen could only imagine.
"Don't make me laugh." She snorted. "He is popular, please." Laughing. "How many times? It's all about popular."
"Surely there are more important things..." Ianto said, beginning to doubt himself and seriously regret asking for her help.
"No. It's not about aptitude; it's the way you're viewed so it's very shrewd to be very verypopular like me." She waited for Ianto to exit the cubicle and when she did she gasped. "Ianto... you look beautiful." She grinned as he examined his reflection. He was now wearing a pain of dark skinny jeans and a black leather jacket. After much persuasion Gwen coerced him into buying the outfit. "You want to do some more shopping?"
"I have to go..." He thanked her and all but ran to the taxi station.
"You're welcome..." Gwen sighed and began the short journey home. She thought back to the change in Ianto. "And though you protest," she whispered under her breath, "your disinterest, I know clandestinely you're gonna grin and bear it, you're newfound popularity." She began to hum to herself as she walked into the house. An image of Jack and Ianto popped into her head. "Yes Ianto, you'll be popular... just not quite as popular as me!"
The next day Jack received a shock as Ianto walked into the board room. "Ianto..." Gwen grinned at Ianto and gave him the thumbs up. "I think that's it Gwen, you can leave now." He hinted to Gwen and she winked at Ianto. "What's happened?"
"Do you like it?" He lifted his arms in an awkward manner. "I felt like a change, Gwen helped."
"So that's what it is..." He nodded thoughtfully, scrutinising his leather jacket with a red top underneath. "You realise you look like a carbon copy of her don't you?"
"I was afraid you would say that. But Gwen is always so confident and I was worried that you were going off me."
"Never. I love you Ianto." He admired Ianto's smile. It's so sad... he thought to himself, why doesn't he see what I see? When he smiles it seems as the whole world stops and stares for a while. "Listen to me," He pulled him onto his lap. "You know I'd never ask you to change, if perfects what you're searching for then just stay the same. Trust me; I miss the suits and your waistcoat. When I see your face there's not a thing that I would change." Ianto blushed and buried his face into Jack's neck. "So don't even bother asking if you look okay, you're amazing, just the way you are Ianto Jones." He pulled his young lover into a warm kiss.
Gwen looked up through the glass wall and saw Jack and Ianto kissing. My work here is done...
I am fully aware of this fanfiction's cheesiness, but we all need a bit of cheese in life, right? The two songs in this were not mine of course, but Popular from the musical Wicked (if you've not seen it I would recommend it, very clever) and Just the way you are, by Bruno Mars. R AND R please ;) If anyone has any requests please talk to me :D