Kuroo, T [16.01.14 09:06]: Kenma
Kuroo, T [16.01.14 09:07]:We're starting a pool to see how many boxes Bokuto can move from the morning shipment before Asahi notices.
Kuroo, T [16.01.14 09:07]: We're giving you first pick.
Kuroo, T [16.01.14 09:09]: Are you thinking of your answer?
Kuroo, T [16.01.14 09:12]: You can't possibly be that busy already.
Kozume, K [16.01.14 09:12]: I am currently away from my desk right now.
Kuroo, T: [16.01.14 09:12]: Yah!
Kuroo, T: [16.01.14 09:13]: Don't just put your away message on.
Kuroo, T: [16.01.14 09:16]: We're going to skip you, you're losing first pick privileges.
Kuroo, T: [16.01.14 09:20]: Are you playing Maple Story again?
Kuroo's desk phone rings the minute his last message to Kenma is sent.
"Ah, if it isn't my lovely co-worker Kenma-"
"Kuroo, stop messaging me."
Kuroo swivels a little in his chair. He grabs his chest as if he's been shot in the heart, "Kenma, direct hit."
"Just get a number from him and hang up, the first shipment comes in right before lunch." Bokuto leans from his own chair, headset already on and ready to call the other guys for their bets.
Kuroo and Bokuto share an office working in the marketing department for a mid-sized company in the city. The two are also their advertising and sales department. Their location is one of the smaller branches, but they lead in sales, so corporate is fine to leave the branch as is. Why screw up a good thing, right?
Bokuto thinks their branch success is due to location and of course, their awesome sales team (it's him and Kuroo, after all.) But Kuroo thinks there's a little more that goes into being one of the leading branches. Knowing your existing customers, knowing your new customers, and knowing the team you work with. That's why their branch performs so well. They might be few in number, definitely one of the smaller branches, but the turn over rate is basically non existent. There hasn't been an open position since they last hired Yamaguchi in HR.
When a team works together for a long period of time, they become more like family. So when Kenma calls and says something so bluntly, rather than just responding through their work chat, Kuroo knows something's up.
"Kenma, you okay?"
Kuroo hears Hinata's voice in the background as well as a few others he doesn't recognize. Are they being robbed? Taken hostage? What was that code word they came up with a few years ago in situations like this?
Then he hears Kenma cover his mouth piece. There's muffled noises and most definitely a panicked Hinata. "Yah, what's going on over there?"
"Kuroo, I have to go, just, please stop messaging me." Kenma's voice is hushed, hurried.
"Are you being kidnapped? Just send the burglars to us, tell them we have the money. Bokuto and I can take them." Bokuto is up out of his chair, doing push-ups.
Kuroo hears Kenma's name being called, before Kuroo can ask who's in the office with them Kenma cuts him off, "I'm being audited."
The phone connection cuts. The dial tone fills Kuroo's ears.
"What's up?" Bokuto asks, laying on his stomach on the office floor, full given up on the push-ups.
"I think... Kenma is being robbed." Kuroo didn't catch the last word Kenma said to him. He could have swore he said something about being modest, but that doesn't make sense. Molested? How can he be so calm if he's being molested!? He did sound a little more on edge than normal, though. He was talking so quickly and in such a low tone it was hard to get out what he was saying. Kenma's horrible to understand on the phone normally, which is why he's in data entry and coding.
One would think a data entry position would bore Hinata to death, but with Kenma's help it isn't so bad. The two balance each other out. It's just enough of a fast paced, changing environment for Hinata to never tire and it's a secluded enough position for Kenma to enjoy. Hinata can talk Kenma's ear off all day and the quiet boy will gladly listen and give little input. They work well together.
The same could be said for all of their departments. Daichi and Sugawara run the finance department. Both are level headed enough and dedicated to take their work seriously at all times, which is a must-have quality for someone you trust your finances with. There are certain things that stress Daichi to no end; fourth quarter numbers, bonus reports, that Sugawara handles with ease. Then, there are other things, like finding a missing expense, or reconciling a default account that cause a Sugawara meltdown. In return, Daichi is able to sift through the mess calmly and efficiently.
Yaku and Lev handle customer service. Some customers want to talk with an upbeat voice with a smile, reassuring them that whatever reason they're calling in will be addressed. Other customers want a stern voice that will get them an answer to their question in the most precise and concise way. Even though Lev might be on the lighthearted side, but he does a good job of not taking things angry customers say too personal. Yaku, for the most part, enjoys the angry customers. He likes saving the sale, making the customer feel like they matter. Alternatively, Yaku also likes telling customers where to go if they cross he line and make outrageous accusations about their company.
Even their basement teams, Kuroo likes to call them, are paired well. Nishinoya and Asahi are their shipping/receiving department in the basement warehouse. Nishinoya does well handling their vendors or catching a damaged or defective shipment. Asahi keeps the warehouse put together. Everything has a place, there's a method to his madness, one could say. Since Nishinoya trusts his method completely, there's little argument to be had.
Of course, there are some departments that have similar personalities that it's a wonder how they manage. Tanaka and Kageyama are their delivery drivers. Let's just say it's a good thing they drive separately.
Their human resources department consists of Yamaguchi and Ennoshita. Both are seen as push overs, but push them too far and they're anything but nice. Tanaka and Kageyama are the only team to push them far enough, but neither boy will talk about that experience again.
And then there's Kuroo and Bokuto. Some would say the two boys are too alike for their own good. Both lean on the extroverted spectrum, but it comes with the position, doesn't it? You have to be charming to be in sales. You have to know how to 'woo' the customer when I comes to closing the deal. What's going to catch your next new customer's attention? It comes full circle to Kuroo's theory of a great branch. Customer satisfaction. Company satisfaction. Easy enough.
And it's not like Bokuto and Kuroo are carbon copies of one another. Kuroo thinks a little longer before he speaks. Just a little.
"Did you say robbed?" Bokuto asks.
"Yeah, I think that's what he said." Kuroo is tempted to call Kenma back, but if he really is being robbed he doesn't want to risk making the robbers even more angry with his friend. What if they have weapons?
Bokuto is up on his feet again, this time doing a few squats, as if he's going to be the one to rescue Kenma and Hinata. "Well, did he give you the code word?"
"What's the code word again?"
"I thought you would know."
The boys listen for a scuffle below. Kenma and Hinata's office is a floor below their own, but there's nothing.
"Should we call him back?" Bokuto is on the same page as Kuroo.
"I don't think so... that could make it worse."
Bokuto snaps his fingers, "I know who to call!"
"If you even pick up the phone and say 'Ghostbusters' I'm going to rob you myself."
There's a flash in Bokuto's eyes that let's Kuroo know he thought about it, but he's actually dialing an extension so he knows it's not an appropriate time to joke.
"Yamaguchi, we're being robbed!"
Kuroo hear's the 'WHAT' from the other end of the Bokuto's headset and quickly a set of footsteps close to their office door. Yamaguchi bursts through their door, golf club in hand, raised high like he's about to tee off.
"Wow..."
"You just walked right in here..."
"And endangered yourself..."
"For us..."
Yamaguchi thinks the robber has him pinned, but realizes its Kuroo and Bokuto, bear-hugging him.
"You're so brave!"
"And here we are, calling you when we should be rescuing Kenma and Hinata!"
"W-Wait you're not the ones being robbed?"
"Kenma is." Bokuto and Kuroo say into Yamaguchi's dress shirt. Smells like citrus something.
"Wait, Kenma is being robbed while he's being audited?"
"Being what?"
"Kenma is being audited."
"By who?" So that's what Kenma had said when he hung up the phone. Oops.
"...Our auditors?"
Kuroo stands up while Bokuto still clings to Yamaguchi, enjoying how nice the younger boy's shirt smells.
"We have auditors?"
"Yes, Bokuto," Yamaguchi tries to gently brush off the larger man attached to his shirt, "internal auditors. They've been here all week."
"WHAT!?" The boys are in great synchronization today.
"I went over this at our branch meeting on Monday. Were you guys not listening? Ennoshita told me I should have made you guys repeat what I said." Yamaguchi looks defeated, tired, and yet relieved, all at the same time.
"How come we haven't seen them around?"
"They usually stick to one department, no reason for them to wander." Yamaguchi remembers he's holding a golf club and immediately feels silly, "they'll see the whole office by the end of the week anyway."
"It's Thursday. Where's our audit?" Bokuto asks, sounding a little offended. He hates being left out of anything.
Yamaguchi straightens his shirt and makes sure there's no damage to the door he just kicked open, "if you were listening on Monday you would have known that your department is last. You'll be audited tomorrow." The sales team high fives.
"Saving the best for last!" Kuroo nods, at Bokuto's statement. Meeting co-workers from different locations is always fun. It's kind of exciting to know that there will be some new faces around, even if it's only for a day.
Once he's assured the door is in one piece Yamaguchi goes to leave the office. "Although I will say you two are the only ones that actually want to be audited."
"Why's that?" Kuroo doesn't want to sound stupid, but...
"What does an auditor do, anyway?" Leave it to Bokuto to have no shame.
Yamaguchi wishes he would have sent Ennoshita to check out the distress call. He thinks about leaving the conversation at that. If they had been listening on Monday they would have known. At the same time... if they knew what they were in for this whole week Yamaguchi would have probably used his golf club sooner rather than later. That's probably why he's so hesitant even now to explain the auditing process.
Fuck it. Yamaguchi's audit was on Monday.
"It's when our internal auditor's come in and watch what you do all day. The look at your past work, how well you keep your records, if you're within any rules and regulations, they basically pick apart your job and make sure you're doing it correctly."
Yamaguchi is met with blank stares from Kuroo and Bokuto.
"We're awesome at our jobs." Bokuto says and Yamaguchi just shakes his head.
"It doesn't matter how well you do you job," Yamaguchi sees the hurt expression on Bokuto's face, "I mean of course it does, to me! To us! I just mean that's not what the audit is about."
"But you just said-"
"I said they're making sure it's being done correctly. Correctly." Yamaguchi stresses the three syllables one last time before leaving their office. He needs a cup of coffee, and maybe a doughnut. Yeah, a jelly doughnut. He deserves it, dammit.
Kuroo and Bokuto are left in their office. It's quiet. So quiet, they can hear the classical music Yamaguchi and Ennoshit play in their office down the hall.
"Well," Kuroo opens a filing cabinet, one he forget they had. He thought the drawer was jammed, maybe the lock broken, but once he finally frees the draw he realizes there are just too many papers stuffed in it, jamming the drawer. He checks the three draws below the first one, but has to stop at the last one because there is an actual lock on it. Neither boy knows where the key is.
Kuroo ends up using the fire extinguisher (also forgotten about) to break the lock. Once the lock is off Bokuto opens the drawer, anxious to find out what's in it. They locked it for a reason, so it's got to be something important, right? Maybe an organized filing system? One with all of the necessary paperwork?
Instead they find a candy bar, so old the wrapper is worn and colors faded. Bokuto takes it out, opens the wrapper and splits the candy bar in half. He hands one to Kuroo and takes a bite out of his own.
"We're fired."
"Yup."