Bloody Sapphire Blade: I wrote this like a year ago, but I'm finally typing it up and post. MY LAME ATTEMPT AT A HUMOR FIC. Review anyway.
Revised 7-21-2011
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Yearbook
School was out, and it was officially the first day of summer. Fourteen of my friends and I were currently riding in a van on our way to God-knows-where. We'd been on the road for about two or three hours now. From my current position, which was sprawled out on in the middle of Neji and Gaara on the second row seat in the van, I could see the sun beginning to rise. It was quite beautiful and relaxing.
I took a quick glance at my friends. It was surprisingly quiet. Then again, it was still early in the morning, but that had never seemed to stop Naruto, Ino, and Kiba before. Temari was driving with Kankuro in the passenger seat. She was about to start her third year in college and Kankuro was about to be a college sophomore, yet they still found it entertaining enough to hang out with us every once in a while.
On the first row behind them were, from left to right, Sakura, Kiba, and Naruto. Sakura had to sit with them to keep them in check. Kiba and Naruto had to sit closest to the door because of infinite amount of Monster(1) they'd drank or it could be that they just had bladders smaller than their brains like Sasuke stated. Which of course led to an argument at five in the morning. I smiled at the thought.
Behind them were Neji, me, and Gaara. There was no real reason for our sitting arrangement. Neji was slightly tilted to the left with elbow on the window sill and his face resting on his fist. My head was laid back rested on his collar with my legs stretched out across Gaara's lap. He had his left elbow mounted on one of my thighs to prop up his head. He occasionally switched thighs or lifted up to keep my legs from getting too numb. His right forearm rested casually slung over my lower legs as he stared blankly at the road ahead. I was surprised Neji and Gaara hadn't dumped me on the floor yet.
Behind us were Ino, Hinata, and Shikamaru. Ino was twirling her ponytail around her finger, looking out the window, and listening to her iPod. Hinata was reading some book, and Shika was naturally asleep with his head thrown back on the seat.
On the last and longest row were Chouji, Lee, Shino, and Sasuke. Chouji was working on his fifth bag of chips, Lee was discussing something with Shino about a book Aburame was holding, and Sasuke was looking at the sunrise out of the window.
How did we get into this predicament? Well, it all started when Ino had suggested that we all celebrate the high school graduation of Neji, Lee, Shikamura-he'd skipped a grade-and I by doing something memorable. And that memorable something just happened to be a road trip since we wanted to go out of town and couldn't decided on where to go exactly. We'd ride until we could decide or at least until we saw something interesting enough to make us want to stay there.
"Hinata!" Everyone's eyes snapped to the girl with the platinum blond hair. Even Shika sat up to see what was going on. "You didn't tell me that you'd finished!" Ino beamed and Hinata blushed lightly at all the sudden attention. The blond continued to stare at the book that Hinata was holding. "Guys, look." Ino commanded gesturing to the book that Hinata was holding. "Hinata, Tenten, Sakura, and I have been working on a special yearbook for us all year."
I sat up out my comfortable position and turned all the way around in the seat, sitting with my legs tucked under me and facing backwards so that I could get a good look. "We have? And a yearbook?" I questioned, puzzled. 'We already have yearbooks.'
"Before you say anything, Tenten," Ino stated, "the special one that Hinata had to edit and put the finally touches on."
A look of utter bewilderment was all she got for her trouble.
"You know when Hinata told to take lots of pictures and collect some interesting ones this school year and turned them into her?"
"Oohhh…" I remembered now. I nodded.
"It's like a scrapbook/yearbook," she explained to everyone else. "It has all the things the school yearbook does like the club and staff official photos plus some. It's centered around us. You know all those things that had to be edited out of the school's official book?"
I nodded.
"Well they're in here! And some of the pictures that we ourselves have been taking, so everyone contributed even if you didn't know you did." She beamed.
Interested, I leaned over the seat to get a better view.
"I wanna see!" Naruto shouted and climbed onto the seat between Gaara and I. Kiba took up the space between the third row and the window. Sakura climbed the seat situating herself between Neji and I to see.
"Alright, Hinata. You have everyone's attention." That was Ino.
Hinata opened the book to the middle to a page titled Most Memorable Moments. "The first part is the regular yearbook, " she explained.
A couple of us made that 'Ohhh…' face, and she flipped the page.
My face grew hot, and if I took the time to look around, I bet I wasn't the only female affected this way by what I saw. The page had a picture of Kakashi running down the hall full of students from Anko-sensei. Anko was holding shredded cloth that I assume was his shirt. The caption under the picture read Kakashi-sensei-Shirtless, Maskless Running From An Angry Anko-sensei.'
"I don't know what Kakashi did that day, but Anko surely did have him running for his life," Naruto commented.
I burst out laughing along some of the others. "Yeah," I agreed. "And who managed to catch that on camera? Kakashi was so fast, it was like a freaking whirlwind going through the hallways."
"Sasuke," Hinata answered.
We all looked at the dark-haired young man. "What? I had my camera phone out at the right time in the right place," he smirked.
"More like he set sensei up," Sakura mumbled.
On the next page was a picture of me, Ino, and Sakura sitting at a table at that new café looking stunned. Hinata was standing by the table frowning some dude from Sound High, our rival school. The dude was holding his bloody nose. The caption for this read: Hinata Doing Some Damage.
"I remember that day. That dude was being a real perv," Sakura put in. Then Neji, Sasuke, Naruto, and Shikamaru came in, and we all got into a fight with that dude and his gang in the café, because he was about to hit Hinata back. "We'll never be able to go back to that café again," Sakura continued, nostalgically.
And I'd never seen Naruto so angry.
"But on the plus side, HINATA KICKED BUTT!"
We laughed at Sakura's proclamation .
"Also, guys, you can look on the bottom to see who took the picture and who submitted it to be in the yearbook," Hinata said. "The first one with Kakashi, the picture was taken by Sasuke as we all know and it was submitted by Ino. The second pic was taken by Kiba and submitted by Sakura."
With that said, she turned the page. It was Neji and I sitting on the living room couch. We were at Hinata's and Neji's condo for the sleepover and were spraying E-Z Chez on each other. It had started when I lost the water drinking contest~stupid, I know~to him and wanted to get payback. I smiled at the fond memory. The caption read: Neji's Smiling. WAY TO GO, TENTEN! It was taken and submitted by Hinata.
"Awww," Sasuke cooed, mockingly. "You were so cute, Hyuuga."
Neji glared at Sasuke while the guys had a laugh at his expense.
Hinata changed the page. It was a picture of Sasuke and Sakura holding on to each other with startled expressions as they fell over into Hinata's pool. Ino was standing a couple of feet away from them with a satisfied look on her face. There was a thought bubble coming from Ino's head with the words "Get a room" in it.
"I remember that," Kiba said. "Ino snuck up on them and pushed them in the pool in the middle of their make-out session." We burst out laughing, and Sasuke scowled while Neji smirked at him. The caption read: The Hot Couple's Unexpected Cool Down Picture taken and submitted by Tenten.
Once everyone stopped gasping for air, Hinata flipped to the next page. It was a pic of Kurenai-sensei on a stage singing and dancing at some club. Caption: Kurenai Singing 'Hips Don't Lie' and Belly-Dancing Taken by Shino and submitted by Tenten
"That was our trip to the States, right," Sakura asked.
I nodded.
"That was a very YOUTHFUL night indeed." Like we don't know who that came from.
"Yeah. Asuma-sensei was drooling so hard," Ino added.
We laughed and Hinata turned the page.
A picture of Gai wearing some black jeans and a white shirt with black wolves on it. Caption: The Day We Wish Would Last FOREVER-Gai-sensei With NO SPANDEX Pic taken and submitted by Temari.
Next page. Asuma and Kurenai slowing dancing. Pic taken by Shikamaru. Submitted by Hinata
Page turn. In this pic, Principal Tsunade's head was on her desk, face slightly flushed while her secretary, Shizune, scolds her and Genma-sensei was watching with indifference. Caption: Drunk On the Job. How Unsurprising Taken by Naruto. Submitted by Sakura.
Next page. Iruka-sensei is sitting in the classroom on his desk reading a sheet of paper and blushing. A bouquet sat next to him. Caption: Someone Has A Secret Admirer…
"Hey, Naruto, weren't you the one who delivered that to Iruka-sensei?" Ino asked.
Naruto scratched the back of his head. "Yeah," he answered.
"So… did him and Rin-sensei ever get together?" Ino raised her eyebrows in a suggestive gesture.
"Of course." Naruto replied with a devious grin on his face.
Hinata turned the page. It was me and my ex standing in empty hallway after school. He was nursing the black eye that I'd just given him. I mean seriously, no means no, and he didn't seem to get that. "I don't remember anyone snapping that picture," I said. Caption: I've Finally Moved On. I'm Already Gone. Taken by Neji and submitted by Hinata.
'Neji,' I thought. 'I should've known.'
Page turned. A pic of Shino without his shades or hood on. Caption: Told You Shino Was A Hottie. Pay Up, Sakura and Ino! Taken and submitted by Tenten.
And MAN did I have to work to get that picture!
I grinned as me and Hinata held our hands toward the blond and pinkette. They grimaced and slapped fifties in our hands. I could feel Neji and Shino glaring at me, but I didn't care. I'm fifty dollars richer! HA!
On the next page was Tsunade yelling at Gai. A speech bubble was coming from her mouth. It read: "SHUT UP BEFORE I STICK MY FOOT UP YOUR *** AND SHOW YOUR INSIDES SOME STYLE!"
DUDE! We got a laugh out of that one!
The next few pages went as followed:
Haku in a tux standing beside a limo.
Jiraiya getting pummeled by some angry women.
Naruto on stage singing. He's actually quite good too.
Temari dancing on stage at a concert.
Gaara laughing at the make up and dress Kankuro had to wear after he lost a bet. Really got a laugh out of that one.
Kiba taking orders at his fast food job.
Rin-sensei blushing when Iruka-sensei walked by.
Shika struggling to hold Lee and Chouji back to keep them from killing some Sound students. "Could've helping instead taking pictures," Shika mumbled.
After that there was a page labeled Who's Who.
Most Active-Tenten. There was a collage with me playing volleyball, basketball, running track, swimming, gymnastics, etc.
Best Hair-Neji. I smiled at the title. There a picture of a shirtless Neji just waking up with his hair untied and falling across his shoulders. You could just see the beginnings of black ink marks of the huge, tattooed angel wings that covered his back on the top of his shoulders and on his sides through the silk curtain of his hair. He looked like he was still half asleep, eyes doing a sort of squint.
"Awww," all the girls cooed. "So pretty..."
"I am not pretty," Neji said through clenched teeth.
We just laughed.
Best Smile-Naruto. There were three different pictures of Naruto and on each he was sporting a different smile. They were labeled Goofy, Friendly, and Foxy respectably.
Most Intellectual- Shikamaru. There was a picture of him actually awake in class. THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END!
Best Personality-Lee. A picture of him doing his 'nice-guy' pose in the hallway.
Most Talented- Sasuke. Making a 3pt shoot in the picture.
Most Likely To Succeed-Sakura. There was a picture of her raising her hand in class.
Best Dressed-Ino. She was, of course, in one of her fabulous Ino originals doing her sexy pose.
All Around Friendliest-Hinata. There was a picture of her advising some freshman.
Most Artistic-Shino. Picture: He was in art class drawing yet another one of his master pieces.
Most Intimidating-Temari. She was scowling. "Ah… That look brings back so many memories," I sighed out nostalgically.
"You mean about the first time you met Temari in that martial arts tournament, and she practically handed your butt to you on a silver platter," Sakura quipped helpfully.
I smiled, brightly. "Exactly," I said, then grimaced. "I sore for two weeks after that."
Everyone laughed at my expense. Then the page was turned again.
Cutest Cutey-Chouji. A couple of girls staring fondly at Chouji in the mall.
Group Clown-Kiba. Holding Naruto in the headlock. The title Group Class instead Class Clown came in because we were not in the same class.
Most Adorable Bad Boy-Gaara. There was a picture of me, Ino, Sakura, and Hinata totally glomping a flustered Gaara. I knew the redhead was glaring death at the title.
Most Entertaining-Kankuro. He was singing on stage in the dress that he had to wear when he lost the bet to Gaara and Temari.
Hottest Single-Haku. He was at prom dancing with some girl.
Cutest Couple-Lee & Hikari. There was a picture of Lee and the American chick he'd started dating.
Hinata, finally reaching the end, closed the book. "That's it, people," Hinata concluded.
"That was great, Hinata," Sakura stated.
We all agreed-except for those that were still brooding for being 'pretty' and 'adorable.' -CoughNejiandGaaraCough.-
"We should definitely make one for next year too," I added.
Everyone made their way back to their seats. I looked at my boyfriend, Neji, to see that he was still pouting. "Aw, Neji, cheer up," I patted him on the cheek. "I mean being pretty isn't so bad. I have to go through life looking this good everyday." I smiled as he glared at me.
"YOSH! MY YOUTHFUL FRIEND! EVEN YOUR YOUTHFUL RIVAL, SASUKE DID NOT DENY HOW ATTRACTIVE YOU ARE!" Lee yelled.
"…Well… he was the first one to mention how 'cute' I was in that first picture," Neji stated, slyly throwing at sideways glance at Uchiha.
"OH MY GOSH, SASUKE!" That was no one but Sakura. "And here I was thinking that you were just playing hard-to-get. You mean to tell me that you've been LUSTING AFTER NEJI'S FLESH ALL THIS TIME!"
Neji was smirking, and Lee looked totally clueless. After that everyone except Neji, Sasuke, and Lee just lost it. Gaara was smirking smugly and throwing Sasuke questioning looks. All the while looking quite amused.
I laughed so hard, my insides started to hurt. Through teary eyes, I vaguely made out Shino taking a picture of Sasuke's furious blushing and sputtering nonsense in his defense.
Well, at least we were getting a head-start on our next yearbook.
BSB: Yeah. I got lazy toward the end. Sorry if there are any mistakes. I'm too lazy to proofread properly. REVIEW PLEASE! AND IF YOU'RE TOO LAZY JUST RATE IT 1-10. Ten being the best. Ja ne! ^_^
(1) Monster is the name of an energy drink for those of you who don't know.