Four-five seconds ...
I was walking around in the strrets, not knowing how i felt , where i was going , what to do ...
"i think i've had enough , i migth get a little drunk ..."
"I say what's on my mind , i migth do a little time..."
"cause all of my kindness , is taken for weakness..."
Later that day i had an argument with my father , just like always since my mother died when i was 10.
I am someone who always says what he thinks and thinks what he says . And that doesn't suit my father's personality .
Taugh this time it went to far ...
-What do you mean you are gay ?!
-It means what it means dad ! I have been like this the whole time !
-No ! you got out with that Annie girl !
-Dad stop ! You know i didn't ! i helped her out ! she was harassed in the streets by a strage guy ! what did you expect me to do ?!
-Do not lie to me eren , if you weren't dating her that means you are just a weak faggot !
-I hope mom doesn't hear you ...
And he went red , rage glowing in his eyes.
-DONT EVER TALK ABOUT HER AGAIN !
And here i was , headphones in my ears , with a red cheek and multiple bruises , like always , walking down the road that led to central park .
"Now i'm four five seconds from wild'in !"
"and we got three more days till friday~"
My head was a mess , and i had nowhere to go to , since my dad kicked me out .
"i'm just tryin' to make i back home by monday , mornin' , i swear i wish somebody would tell me , ooh that's all i want..."
I continued walking , past central park , past the buildings , past the poeple, took the bus , the train , and walked , walked , walked ...
"Woke up an optimist . Sun was shining im positive ."
I remembered my mother's cuddles , her hair , her eyes, her smell ...
-Dear ! sun is shining ! its a pretty day ! let's go for a walk , wake up ! i made your favourite cookies and invited armin and mikasa over !
I walked.
"then i heard you was talkin' trash . Hold me back i'm bout' to spaz' !"
-NO SON OF MINE IS A FILTHY FAGGOT ! YOURE MOTHER WOULD BE DISGUSTED ! LEAVE THIS HOUSE ! BEFORE YOU DIRTY HER MEMORY !
Teeth clenched , fists closed tigthly , i walked .
"Yeah im four five seconds from wildin' . and we got three more days 'till friday !"
"I'm just tryin' to make it back home by monday , mornin' "
Where is my home now ?
"I wish somebody would tell me , ooh that's all i want !"
Tell me , where is my home now ?
"And i know that your'e up tonigth ! "
My home is with you mom ...
As i saw the bridge nearby i walked .
"Thinking how could i be so selfish ..."
What will Armin and Mikasa say ?
"But you called 'bout a thousand times ! "
That voice is still calling me ..
"Wondering where i've been ..."
Mom ...?
"Now i know that your'e up tonigth ! "
Mom..?!
"Thinking how could i be so reckless ? "
The border is close mom ... I'm comming ...
"But i just can't apologize ! "
That voice still calls me ...
"I hope you can understand..."
One more step .
"If i go to jail tonigth ..."
-From now on eren , momy wont come home ... so you stay with me ! understood ?! Never leave .
"Promise you'll pay my bail..."
Mom ...i want to break free this time ...
" See thay want to buy my pride , but that just ain't up for sale ..."
How strange mom ... this voice that calls me doesn't looks like yours... have i forgotten you yet ?
why can't i take that step ?
Nothing waits for me anymore ... no home , no friends , no parents...
"See all of my kindness , is taken for weakness "
I just dont want to burden this world with something as useless as me ; a human that no one needs...
"Now i'm four five seconds from wildin' , and we got three more days till friday ..."
One step ...
"I'm just tryin' to make it home by monday, mornin' "
I walked .
" I swear i wish somebody would tell me , ooh that's all i want ..."
But i dont fall ...
I dont see my mother's eyes .
They aren't grey .
I dont feel my mother's arms ...
They aren't this muscular .
"Four five seconds from wildin' "
She doesn't smell like this .
"And we got three more days till friday ."
-Who are you ?
-Got a home Brat ?
-No.
"Just tryn'a make it home by monday, mornin'"
-LEVI ! YOU GOT HIM ?!
-I do shitty glasses ! Isn't it obvious ?
I dont understand quite well but ...
-C'mon kid...
"I swear i wish somebody would tell me..."
-...Let's go home .
"Ooh that's all i want..."