Disclaimer- One person owns iCarly. I'm not it.
A/N- Hey, my peeps! You know all of those stories where Sam changes herself for Freddie? Yea…this isn't one of them. Now it's Freddie's turn to change for Sam. When she gets a new boyfriend, Freddie begins to morph into a new person. And what does Sam, Carly, and a random hobo have to say about it? Read and find out.
Warning- The following story contains a bunch of weirdness. Viewer discretion is advised.
As I stare at my reflection in the mirror, I see a clean-cut teenage boy wearing a striped polo shirt, and light brown khaki's. Not a single hair out of place, nor a single wrinkle on his clothes. I sigh loudly, kicking the wall in frustration.
That's just it! The reflection I see is of Fredward Benson. Class A nerd – or at least Sam says so. But when have I ever cared what Sam Puckett thought? Oh, wait! Now I remember!
The day I fell in love with her.
I'm not going to go into this long love story about how the blonde-headed demon stole my heart. Because, to be honest, I wouldn't be able to. I didn't just wake up one day and think, "I'm in love with Sam! Yippee!" Because it didn't happen like that. It took a simple fire escape kiss, lots of denial, and her captivating blue eyes to push me over. And because of that, I began to fall. For the one and only Samantha Joy Puckett.
Shoot me now.
The day I realized this small fact was not a joyous one for me. Why, you ask? Well, I'll tell you. Jake.
Also known as: The guy who Sam fell head over heels for.
Shoot. Me. Now.
Ever since Sam announced that she and Jake were dating, I've been asking myself one thing. Why can't that be me? I mean, is it so wrong for me to want to be the one who Sam kisses, holds, and looks lovingly at?
I guess so, because I'm not that guy. And, unless I do something to win over Sam's heart, I probably never will be.
Which brings us to my current situation. If you remember correctly, I was staring hatefully at my reflection. And I still am. So, I do what any logical person would do in my situation.
Grab some hair moose, baggy pants, secretly work out for a few months, and completely change my outer appearance in hope that Sam will fall for a guy who's not really me. What could go wrong?
Twenty minutes later, I strut confidently to my door. I have a new look, a new confidence, and above all, I'm a new me.
"Fredward Benson! What in the name of tofu is in your hair?" I hear my mom yell at me. My eyes widen, and I quicken my pace.
"It's just hair gel!" I yell, as I race out the door. So much for my suave confidence.
I regain my composure, and knock quickly but surely on Carly's door. I hear shuffling on the inside, and the door swings open.
"Oh, it's just you. I thought you'd be- OH MY GOD, FREDDIE! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? YOU LOOK HOT!" Carly shrieked, taking in my appearance in shock. After realizing she was gawking, she quickly closed her mouth and blushed.
"Gee, thanks," I say, laughing at her slight blush. "Can I come in yet?" She blushes again.
"What happened?" Carly repeats, after letting me in. I casually stroll over to her kitchen, and shrug.
"Thought I needed a change," I say, opening the fridge. I grab some ham, and sit down on the couch.
"Freddie! What are you doing? That's Sam's ham!" Carly cries, trying to take the meat from me. I roll my eyes at her, and plop the pork in my mouth.
"Was Sam's ham. And, unless Sam wants to wait a week or so, I'm not givin' it back," I say, eating some more ham. Carly stares at me in utter shock.
"Do you want to die?" Carly yells in my face. I wipe the spit from my cheek, and smirk.
"And who's gonna kill me? Sam? HA!"
"Wow. When you said you wanted a change, you really meant it," Carly says, shaking her head. At that moment, Sam chooses to walk in with…him.
"What's this about changing?" Sam asks, dragging her boyfriend behind her. Nope, still can't say that without cringing.
"Hey, Samantha," I taunt, and smirk at her. She drops her boyfriend's hand, and comes over to me. She grabs my collar, and peers into my eyes.
"Do you have a deathwish, nub?" I shiver at the closeness, but remain in control nonetheless.
"Don't call me a nub, princess. It doesn't fit me anymore," I say, removing her hand from my shirt. She glares at me, slightly shocked. She now takes in my new appearance.
And she continues to do this for another 30 seconds…Yep, my new look worked.
"Close your mouth, Sam," I laugh, patting her on the head. She snaps out of her reverie, and wipes the drool from her lips. Yea, you heard me. Drool.
"That's it, Fredlame!" She yells, jumping on my back. I fall to the ground, the wind knocked out of me. But, no matter! Remember I told you I've secretly worked out? Well, time to put those results to the test.
Though it takes me a few seconds, I am eventually able to push her off me. I flip her around, making it so I'm now on top of her. She looks up at me in shock.
"Didn't see that one coming, now did ya?" I ask her cockily. She glares at me, and I shoot her a smirk in response. Much to my pleasure, we remain in this position for a while.
"Um…would you mind getting off my girlfriend?" Jake asks, interrupting our staring contest. What a jerk.
"Oh yea, sure," I say, getting up. I wait until Jake turns away, then I wink at Sam. Her eyes widen, and I smirk.
"So, who wants to go to the movies?" Carly asks, clapping her hands. I glance over at her quickly, about to say yes. But then Sam and Jake agree to go. As if I'd watch them make out in a dark theatre.
"Uh, I would, but I can't," I say quickly. "I got to go work out. You know, keep up that six-pack of mine." I look over at Sam, anxiously awaiting her response. Unfortunately, her face remains neutral.
"Okay," Carly says, slightly disappointed. "Bye Freddie!"
"See you," I nod, heading for the door. Just as I'm leaving, Carly grabs me by the arm. I turn around, and see Carly looking up at me nervously.
"Um…before you go…I want to ask you something," Carly says, fidgeting with the lace on her jacket.
"'Kay. What's up?"
"Do you…maybe…want to go on a date with me?"
Uh oh.
A/N- Looks like Freddie caught more than just Sam's attention. But how long will he keep up his 'cool' facade? And how will Sam react to Freddie's change? Find out next time on iAm Not A Nub.
Remember to review. For the hobos.