Well, this is my first full fanfic in a while. This idea has bitten me and seems to have taken hold. There are some OC's in this as well as the Avengers (eventually). Thanks to my beta, Ladyamesindy, who has encouraged me all the way. Enjoy!
A week after waking up
Steve looked at the book the psychologist, Dr Anders had given to him. A journal, he said it was. A diary, it was called before Steve was involved in that plane crash. He said as much and saw the grey-haired Dutch man nod and write something down on his pad. Another thing to make him feel old and displaced, a man out of time. Nevertheless, there was something that appealed to him about the book, the black leather cover and the creamy pages, almost too nice to write on. It had something about it that would probably be called 'retro' now. A better phrase than 'old-fashioned'.
The man's voice intruded upon his thoughts, bringing his attention back to the doctor. "You can write whatever you want in there or even draw, if you so chose." Steve's eyes widened at the thought of using that paper to draw on, although he hated using lined paper unless he really had to.
Steve uncapped the pen that the man had given him and wrote his name in the 'This belongs to… ' part at the front. Steve Rogers, he wrote in his neat script.
Dr Anders put his pen down, a sign the session was coming to a close. "One last thing, this journal is for you. Don't feel obliged to tell me what you're writing – unless you want to. I can promise, not even Fury will find out." The man gave him a lame smile, both of them knowing while they were working for SHIELD that could never be true. Fury had his ways.
Steve nodded and picked up the smooth book and silvery pen in his left hand and reached out to shake the doctors hand."Thank you, Dr Anders." He gave the man an uncertain smile then turned to leave the grey painted claustrophobic room.
"So do you think he's getting any better?"
"My honest opinion? He's doing remarkably well for a man who has been on ice for so long - only to find out the world has moved on without him."
Fury raised an eyebrow at the doctor. "I rely on your honest opinion, Doctor. I have an assignment for this man that I think he would be ideal for."
Nils Anders frowned."Well, I would normally have my reservations about something like that so soon, but I sense this man has been 'on ice', as it were long enough. I think he needs something to occupy his time."
Fury picked up the file from his desk. "Perhaps its time you learnt about the Avengers Initiative, Doctor..."
Sitting down at the desk in his SHIELD-approved apartment, Steve placed the book and pen in front of him. Opening the journal, he caught sight of the empty pages and his stomach lurched. Just what he would write, he didn't know. Uncapping the pen, he tapped the top against his lip before writing,
'Steve Rogers - Captain America. Right now, I am someone who should have died seventy years ago. I've woken up in another age, an era who barely remembers Captain America. I mourn for Peggy, for Bucky, for the ghosts of my past. Right now.. ' He paused before carrying on.'I can't remember feeling so alone. Lonely. I almost wish I'd stayed frozen.'
Dropping the pen on the page, he sat back and sighed, rubbing the back of his head. Honesty is painful, he thought. Slamming the book closed, he walked over to his bed and lay down, trying to blank out the days' events.