Dear Mr Malo
Dear Mr Malo, of Malo Mart, Kakariko Village, Eldin province.
Hey, it's me, your friendly postman. I'm just writing with an idea I had for broadening your range of stock, if you're interested?
You see, I do a lot of running around all day, delivering letters here, there, and everywhere. And although the uniform is great at keeping me cool, and it's designed for ultimate streamlining for reduced wind-resistance, there's just one snag. You see, at the end of a long day, things can get, well, a teeny tiny bit uncomfortable…down there… If you know what I'm getting at?
It's the shorts, they're just so short and skin tight. I know the ladies like them, but it's getting to the point where I'm just not enjoying the job so much anymore. And that makes me sad.
So anyway, if you could maybe start selling some kind of balm or lotion to help with the, um, chaffing… then I for one would definitely be a regular buyer! And I'm sure you could market it to those hero types I keep bumping into around Castle Town. I could even help deliver it for you!
Lemme know what you think anyways.
Thanks, Postman.
PS. I know it's strange me writing a letter when I'm the one delivering it, but hey, delivering letters is what I do best!