**Warning** includes swear words, gore and ginormous breats
Chapter 1- The Sewers
The sun had barely risen over the small seaside town known as Crows Bay. At the southern most point of Arcadia, the town was bathed in harsh summer solstice sunlight from dusk till dawn. Acting as a trade port many shipments docked at the bay throughout the week, making the otherwise small hustle and bustle of the town rather hectic at certain times of the day.
Walking through the winding narrow streets was Aadya, a half-orc woman that stood at an astonishing six and half feet tall. Her black hair was short and pulled back tightly into a messy tail. Her pale green skin wasn't as harsh as normal orcs, her human heritage likely dulling the colour. Most men would often run the other way after seeing the mass of muscle Aadya carried on her body. But the most striking feature was her chest.
Her breasts were enormous. In proportion to her body it was a feat in itself that she even managed to get out of bed in the morning. What made it even more shocking though was the gigantic spiked maces that she strapped to them. A feature most people would see as sexual instantly lost all of it's appeal on Aadya. She indeed used them to her advantage… but not in the sexualised manor other woman would.
Entering the local tavern, Wet The Wenches Whistle, Aadya smelt the familiar aroma of sweat and ale. It was dimly lit which was to probably mask the weathered wood walls of the tavern. The building itself used to be a ship, one of the greatest Elven ships to ever travel the oceans in fact. But it met its untimely demise in the port of Crows Bay when an inexperienced trainee sailor had forgotten Arcadia existed and crashed on it's shore. How one simply forgets an entire continent exists is beyond the wisdom of most.
Aadya noticed her employer, a dwarf by the name of John, sat at the bar across the room. As she made her way across the tavern she noticed a bunch of rowdy men sat around a dingy makeshift stage. Some of them had black patches over their eyes and others had scimitars strapped to their waists. Aadya immediately recognised them as pirates not only from their appearance, but their bashful and rude presence aswell.
They were cheering and whistling at a girl, no older than 20, who was performing on stage with a beautiful golden harp. The notes coming from the instrument struck the air with enchanting notes which only seemed more beautiful as the girl's voice silkily blended with the harp. Suddenly four orbs of bright white light appeared in front of the girl, proceeding to dance around her like magic. The light bounced off her bathing suit like outfit, reflecting colourful lights from the rainbow of dazzling jewels embedded into the black leather. The men stopped cheering and began to silently admire the beauty of the girl, almost like they had been entranced by her music.
Aadya rolled her eyes at the sight, but as she did she felt a slight tug on the pouch around her waist. Immediately gripping onto it she peered inside noticing that her wooden eagle totem was missing. She never left the totem unattended as it was gifted to her as a child by her mother. It was the only thing she had of hers and was hoping that it would one day lead them back together. Noticing that nobody was around Aadya quickly marched over to John in a flurry. "R'John, sumthins taken my eagle an' am about to rage I am."
"What yer talking bout Aadya. You probably jus' left it at home." John replied drunkenly. He'd been sat in the tavern for over an hour now working on his daily goal of being too drunk to talk coherently. He was the same size as a human child but had the face of a thirty-year-old man. His brown beard was scraggily kept and blended into his hair, making him appear to have a mane. Dwarves aren't known for their cleanliness and appearance so it was overlooked by most due to what where probably racist stereotypes.
"So yer not even gunna help me look for it then r'yah not?" She huffed, knowing that she wasn't going to get any help from John. That's when she noticed a glisten in the air to her left. Her eagle totem seemed to appear mid-air and fall onto the dusty bar in front of a rather glum man. If he wasn't startled by the small wooden eagle dropping inches in front of him he was most definitely by the loud mass of Aadya thumping over accusing him of theft. "Look ere' you thief, you gots about ten seconds to tell me why you stole ma trinket before I smack yah."
"I didn't steal your trinket." He said calmly, trying to look as innocent as possible. "I'm as confused as you as to why it dropped in front of me." Aadya quickly gripped the man's shirt and pulled him close to her face. Her two large Orc teeth protruded from her mouth, causing the man to quake slightly.
"Yer lucky I canny prove nothin, or you'd be lickin your arsehole by now." She said before pushing him back down in her seat and walking over to John. "S'alright now R'John, gots me trinket back I did." John nodded in acknowledgment, not caring in the slightest about Aadya's drama.
Around half an hour had passed and John was still chugging down ale. Dwarves are known for how much they can drink, but Aadya was still impressed at how much John could actually drink, especially for his size. It was a wonder as to how all that liquid fit into his tiny body.
The singing and music had stopped and the men around the stage became rowdy once more. As the petit girl on stage climbed down they whistled her along like a celebrity asking for another performance. "You'll have to wait boys; I'll be performing again later today don't worry." She winked at them as she strutted over towards the bar.
"I don't know how you do it Stephanie, but whenever you perform it's like the entire world stands still. I've never had performer like you." The barman and owner of the tavern said in amazement.
"Music just comes to me Robert." Stephanie replied sitting down on a still next to Aadya. Her vibrant blonde hair flowed beautifully down her back and peaking out from the strands where tiny pointed ears. They weren't as large as normal elven ears so Aadya assumed that she was only a half breed like herself. Even up close the jewels on Stephanie's outfit sparkled like nothing Aadya had seen before. "Any chance for my morning usual?" Stephanie asked, feeling slightly drained from her performance.
"Oh I'm sorry Steph, but we're all out of vodka behind the bar. You drank the last of it last night during your performance. Which was much more scantily clad that usual by the way. It brought in a hell of a lot more customers though."
"Thanks." Stephanie said blushing. The performance in question included an exotic dance routine and the subtle removing of clothes. She always gets carried away after a drink or two. But the extra tips on top are nothing to complain about. "What about the cellar? Don't we have anymore down there?" She asked but Robert shook his head.
"I'm afraid not. Something's been going amiss down in the town sewers and it's caused our drains to block up. The entire basement is flooded. I've only got a few days' supplies left but the next shipment doesn't arrive until next week."
"But without alcohol how are gunna open the tavern? My singing alone won't attract many customers." Stephanie asked, worried that her time in Crows Bay may be coming to an end earlier than she had hoped.
"I don't know, but there has been a message going around town. Apparently whoever finds out what's going on down the sewers and fixes it, the mayor is willing to pay a fine sum of gold as a reward."
"Money?" Said John, sitting upright on his stool taking his immediate attention to the conversation beside him. His scraggily beard was coated in ale and Aadya had to sheepishly wipe it clean without him noticing. "Is this open to anyone?" He asked, leaning forward to get Robert's attention.
"Well yes I'd assume so." The tavern owner replied.
"I'd go myself but it might be dangerous on my own." Stephanie admitted, but Robert shook his hands immediately.
"Oh no, I never meant for you to go down there on your own my dear. I wouldn't dream of asking such a thing of a prize performer."
"What if we go down with her?" John asked pulling out a hand axe that was strapped to his belt. It was larger than a normal Dwarven axe, likely one he'd simply found and repurposed for his own use.
"What?" Both Aadya and Stephanie said in unison.
"You know, that might not be a bad idea. You've been looking for some more money haven't you Steph."
"I guess… but I have another set in ten minutes." She replied, motioning to the empty stage behind them.
"Nonsense, I'll give you the rest of day off. You deserve it anyway!" Robert gleamed, much to Stephanie's subtle hints that the last thing she wants it to go anywhere near the sewers with two people she just met. However, it was true that she did need the extra money and perhaps some extra muscle would prove to make it worth her while.
"Fine, but let's do this quick. I don't want to spend the rest of my day down there." She stated, standing up from the bar. As she did Aadya noticed as a dingy piece of paper appeared in thin air underneath the bar next to Stephanie's hand. She grabbed it quickly and tucked it into her suit, thinking that nobody had noticed.
With that the mismatched group of three left for the town sewers. The first few minutes was spent in silence. John eagerly looking forward to the amount of gold he'd be rewarded. Aadya looked down at Stephanie every few seconds, suspicious of the girl. It wasn't often you saw orbs of light floating around a girl after all. With her trinket vanishing and reappearing in thin air much like the scrap of paper Stephanie had pocketed, Aadya began to suspect the half-elf girl as the culprit. "So, are you from around here?" Stephanie asked, feeling Aadya's eyes burning into her.
"We live on the outskirts of town." John said, not taking much notice of the tension.
"I've not seen you around before and I've been here for a few months now." Stephanie said trying to place their faces. "You must not come to the tavern very often."
"Spend most of our time working we do." Aadya said, cutting into John's words before he could speak.
"Oh, well where do you work? Warriors I'd assume with those." She said pointing at the weapons they shamelessly brandished. Just walking through the main streets of Crows Bay the group of three turned heads. The local tavern performer walking side by side a drunk dwarf and brutish half-orc isn't something you see everyday.
"No we has a mine, collect gems and such." Aadya stated simply.
"I love gems, they're gorgeous."
"Hm."
"…"
"Is this it?" John said suddenly breaking the awkwardness between the two girls. They'd walked down the main street of Crows Bay and directly in the centre was a plethora of streets that stretched out in a several directions. Stores and houses winded around the town made of very different materials. Some wooden, some stone and others of metal.
"It would appear so." Stephanie said, scrunching her nose at the smell that managed to break through the grates seal. Aadya bent down and ripped the grate from the floor and the instant smell of rotting food and faeces filled the air around them. "I change my mind; I'm not going down there."
"Too late fer that Princess." Aadya said, pushing Stephanie forward. Loosing her balance, the blonde haired girl fell down the hole and into the darkness below. A shrill scream followed her and then silence.
"You din't af to kill er." John sighed, knowing that they'd likely have to now cover up yet another murder.
"I'm not dead you blubbering idiot." An annoyed voice stated from below.
"Shame." Aadya shrugged to John before climbing down into the sewer. As they reached the bottom they noticed Stephanie desperately scrubbing at the purple cardigan that she wore over her performing suit.
"I hope shit doesn't stain." She said trying her best not the gag at the smell. Apart from the light peering down on them from above, the group was surrounded by total and utter darkness. "Which way?"
"Give me a sec." John said, walking towards one of the sewer walls. He examined the stonework carefully. Scraping his nails across the walls and pushing his nose to the floor he smelt each individual stone slab around him. "It's that way." He stated, pointing towards the left.
"How do you…" Stephanie started but thought it best not to bother asking how he knew. Instead she followed John and Aadya closely, making sure not to loose one another in the dark. Not much time passed before they came across another fork in the sewers. To the left was another dark walkway and to the right was a large wooden door.
"Sewage flows that way." John said noticing the dirty water beside them.
"So that's the right way then?" Stephanie asked, only gaining acknowledgment from John. Aadya was still highly suspicious of the girl. There was a inkling feeling in the back of her mind that wouldn't go away. If Stephanie was indeed a mage, then why wasn't she using the same orb spell to light up the sewers?
"Spose' we go that way then John lad." Aadya said, knowing that John was more likely thinking of the gold he can pocket and not the possible danger Stephanie presented to them.
They walked further into the darkness until they came out in a small opening. The room itself was dark, the only light inside coming from a grate above them. That's when they heard the loud grinding noise coming from the other side of the room. Amongst the shadows was a dark mass that seemed to shudder and move at their presence.
"What the hell is that?" Stephanie said, noticing the dark mass shift closer to them. Stepping into the dim light the group came face to face with a giant rat. Its fur was damp with sewage water and clumped together with the faeces matted into it. Bright yellow eyes glowed as the rat's rotting teeth chattered, looking forward to their next meal. It lunged forward, diving for John with it's jagged claws.
"Get back yer stinky piece of shite!" He yelled, rolling out the way narrowly dodging the diving rat. He quickly loaded a crossbow bolt and fired at the rat, but the bolt missed and pierced into the wall behind.
"Stand aside R'John, I gots it I do." Aadya said as she ran forward, smashing her reinforced mace breasts into the side of the giant rat. It squealed out in pain as the impact sent it flying across the room and impacting it against the far wall.
"Oh, but it wants to really fight." Stephanie said, shocked that it managed to scramble back to its feet. The impact had severely hurt the creature. The spikes on Aadya's maces had pierced the rats skin and were now coated in thick crimson blood. Its teeth were once again grinding together, snarling at the group.
"Nothins gunna stand int way of me and my gold. Specially not a dirty rat!" John yelled out, frustrated that this was precious time wasted that he could be using to count his gold. He ran up to the rat and smashed his axe down on it's head, piercing the skin and sending blood oozing from it's open wound. Noticing that the rat was looking worse for wear Stephanie knew that it wouldn't take much to finish it off. So she cleared her throat, and began to sing a string of insults that drifted through the air like a viscous but sweet melody.
"Buck teeth, clawed feet, you smell of rotten faeces and are ugly. And they say your CR is Thirteen, ugliest creature I've seen, and I've been travelling since I was Sixteen." As the melody reached the rats ears it stopped snarling for a moment as the words wracked inside of it. A subtle enchantment had been laced amongst the melody and began to take its toile on the disgusting creature. It looked around desperately, before running straight at the opposite wall and bashing its head against it. Thud after thud and the giant rats skull began to cave in. Blood dripped down it's face as it limp body fell to the ground, it's muscles twitching every few seconds. "We did it!" Stephanie cheered, but Aadya didn't look pleased at all. Infact she had a twisted, angered face as she marched over to Stephanie gripping her by the throat and lifting her off the ground.
"I knew it, yous can do magic you can." She said angrily, tightening her grip on Stephanie's throat. "What did you's want with my trinket?" She snarled, pushing up her breasts intimidatingly.
"What are you talking about?" Stephanie croaked out gasping for air. Suddenly from behind the blonde girl a small creature materialised from thin air. It had the body and face of a tiny green dragon but it's four wings resembled that of a butterflies. They glistened with the spectrum of a rainbow and it was quite possibly one of the most beautiful creatures a human would ever see.
"What the fook is that, it looks like a flying rainbow weasel it does." Aadya said, not loosening her grip on Stephanie in the slightest. That's when the creature flew straight at Aadya and dove onto her face, blinding her with it's body and scratching her with it's claws. "Get if owf me John, its urtin ma face with its weasel feet it is!" She screamed, clawing at her face.
"Jalus, leave her alone. This is your fault after all." Stephanie said, snapping her finger for the tiny dragon to return by her side.
"What do yer mean its his fault. You were da one who stole ma trinket." She snarled, feeling the claw marks in her face.
"Im afraid my little friend gets carried away sometimes. He has a tendency to take things that don't belong to him." Stephanie said, scolding the dragon who seemed to shrug like it had done nothing wrong.
"So yer tellin me that this tiny weasel stole ma trinket?" Aadya said, turning her angered gaze at Jalus.
"Well yes, but it didn't see any value for it so it gave it you back." Stephanie said, seeing the anger in Aadya bubbling up to boiling point.
"Ma trinket is the most valuable thing on this planet. Not ye or yer dirty weasel is gon' insult my ma like that!" Aadya screamed, raising her fists into the air. Just as she was about to pummel down on Stephanie and Jalus with her tits or furry, John pulled her back.
"You need to calm down Aadya, am sure the lass din't mean to insult yer mam." John said, trying to diffuse the situation. He pulled Aadya around so their backs where to Stephanie. "If she is a magic user, perhaps she might be useful later on if we af to fight some more of those beasties."
"Spose' your right R'John." Aadya said, calming herself down. "But if she insults me ma again ama smash her face with ma tits I am."
"I can hear you… you've only turned around and you're hardly whispering…" Stephanie stated, shocking both John and Aadya.
"Ye well, least you know where we stand." Aadya said with a huff, marching forward across the room. In her false sense of pride, she had her nose so high into the air that she hadn't noticed the large metal door in front of them. "Aw, that urt that did." She said rubbing her bruising nose.
"I bet that's the way we need ta go." John said, examining the door. It was locked tightly with a large padlock and chain which didn't seem like they where going to budge easily. "We're gunna af to find a key." He said, much to dismay of Stephanie and Aadya who where beginning to really despise each others company.
**Note** Well I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! Let me know if you liked it and tell me about some of your funny D&D experiences. If you click the link below it'll take you to a picture of Aadya, Steph and Jalus. I'm afraid I've not had chance to do John yet but he should be finished some time soon :)
blog/scrumptiousjellyfishwolf