(The Real) AN: Ahem. Ahem-hem. Introducing the brainchild of not only MistressDaisy, but also I! The infamous Parlandarish4E! Hm? What's that? No one knows who I am? Uh huh. No one cares about this story? Uh huh. I hear what you're saying, but it doesn't matter! Why? Because they shall all know about us now!
On a more serious note, welcome to a collaboration that for us (the ones writing) has been coming for a long time. Years in the making, we are finally ready to offer up a fanfic that we are invested in and we hope you become invested too. I, myself, like a little feedbacks so please make sure to review this chapter and any chapters after it. This one is going to be a wild ride and the fruits of our labor will bear great seed! Now onto Daisy!
Daisy here, as you can tell.. I am not alone this time. What's that, I'm doing another story. Well yeah, this baby has been in the planning for a long time and I went to Par last week, 'hey you want to actually write the collab now' and bam. A week later and this beauty is done. I can't help that I have so many ideas (stares at the unfinished ones on my Drive) yeah one day. Like Par said, reviews and feedback would be appreciated, it would mean a lot to us. Now to promote something that Par and I have made, it's a Discord server for Wrestling Fanfic writers and readers alike. A good way to get opinions and give feedback to other writers. Or if you want just a cool place to chat, add me on discord XoMiss Daisy oX (yes there is a space)and I can invite you in. We only have three members right now but I think this is a fun idea and I hope it expands. :) Thanks for reading and enjoy the story.
Lance's POV
You know.. when you move out of home and start to live with people.. it's supposed to be fun. Living with these three goofballs was definitely not what I wanted out of my first apartment experience. I mean everyday started the same, but it never got any better. At 6:30 in the morning AJ's alarm would go off. He managed to get his entire morning routine done in 30 minutes and by 7 am, he was way too fucking happy and way too ready for the goddamn day.
After that you'd think I would get some solace, but that's around the time when Jeff decides to wake up out of his stupor of smoking weed everyday. With his occasional mixing of substance with smoke, it usually meant an unceremonious session of puking. Puking.. Right outside of my fucking door because I'm closest to the bathroom. I swear he's a fucking villain. After Jeff's hour of puke and recovery, it's finally time for my last and certainly not least if he had any say about it roommate to appear.
Randy. I like Randy. He's probably my favorite out of the guys and one of my closest friends, but there is one thing I desperately hate about him. Randy is, for lack of a better word, a man whore, so he usually had girls over most nights and they sure as hell weren't there to play patty cake. Well.. in a way I guess you could say that they were and there was that one girl with in the sexy Scouts uniform and I really don't want to think about that one. Randy loves sex. That's the main thing that you have to know about him. He loves sex at all times, so unfortunately for me the morning was no different. Randy would wake up with whatever girl he had been with the night before and go into a round of morning sex. Very loudly. In the room across from me. Because he could. I was painfully aware of just how much stamina he had because of the moaning and yelling deep into the night. I didn't need to be reminded. It's 9 am Randy. Give it a fucking rest. Have mercy on my poor, shriveled soul.
Oh. And I guess there's me. I drag my aching carcass out of bed at about 9:30 because I can't take the torture anymore. I'm dead tired because Jeff and Randy usually have one person with them in their rooms every night. Jeff's friend goes home and Randy's date goes with him to be at oh you know.. the reasonable hour of 2 in the morning. I hobble my way to the kitchen for coffee and see that AJ has left me enough for one cup. That is his single greatest function on this Earth. I didn't know how he slept through all the night's events but there was one thing I knew, AJ Styles could make a cup of fucking coffee. The sweet nectar of coffee is my only lifeblood. Without it I definitely would have committed a triple homicide. It's as I replenished my life's essence that AJ came to sit down at the table. There was utter silence for a moment before I looked at him. He had been expecting me to say something.
"Yes, AJ?" What the fuck does he want from me? "Something I can help you with?"
"Lance.. I have something important to tell you." AJ started but I cut him off right there.
"Holy shit!" I practically stood up. "You're moving out!" He looked confused as I pounded my fist on the table. "Finally. Finally my days of suffering will end! You know what it's like being an insomniac and living with a guy who wakes up at 6:30? Do you!?"
"I'm not moving out and you know that." AJ said in that patronizingly patient voice of his. Wow! What a patient and loving man! Ladies if you want someone to bring home to your mother.. He's your man.
"Fine. Kill my fun, AJ. Tell me again how you like to not enjoy things." I muttered sitting back down.
"Don't be childish. This will be good news for you." At that I perked up a bit. AJ wasn't a liar. I at least knew that. "Asuka has invited us all out tonight to party. It's going to be a wild night, so I'll be there to be your designated driver."
"Asuka did?" I could still feel sweat rolling down my spine. Since I met her, Asuka has been.. Interesting to say the least. "I'm down. Definitely."
I.. holy shit. My back is killing. My legs are killing. Everything is killing me. In Asuka's room for the whole night. Never again..
"You and Daisy never talk about how you met Asuka much." AJ said knowing it was a sore spot.
"I mean AJ you know.. I- Fuck it. Just drop it, dick." I growled and got up out of my seat. I stalked to the sink and placed my cup inside. "So we're going out tonight. Are we going to see playboy AJ?"
AJ didn't seem to find my teasing fun and had the nerve to look affronted. "Of course not. I need to make sure everyone gets home safe."
There it was again. Nice guy AJ. "You just need to relax and have a drink." I said pointing at him. "You need to loosen up."
"I am plenty loose." I couldn't help but to snort. Jesus AJ. "Not what I meant."
"You said it. Not me." I raised my hands in innocence and walked out to our living room. Jeff was already sitting in there snacking on a egg sandwich. "How the fuck are you eating, right now? That was one of your worst barfing fits I've ever heard."
"I guess I have a strong stomach." Jeff shrugged and took another bite.
"Bullshit. Your stomach's probably holding on by a thread as you eat that." I sat on the armchair that sat next to the couch.
"I can guarantee that it is." AJ said disgusted. He had been the one to pat Jeff's back as he puked. "You're probably going to puke again." He sat down on the couch next to Jeff and I already knew what was about to happen. "Jeff, you need to slow down this lifestyle of yours. You're mixing drugs like no tomorrow and soon you could crash and burn."
My eyes nearly got stuck in the back of my head from the strength of the eye roll that occurred after AJ's first sentence. He had given this speech many times before in different variations. I looked over at Jeff, who stared back dully. I nearly exploded into laughter at the slow blinking of his eyes and his staring back at me. God damn it, Jeff.
Thankfully, it wasn't long before our fourth and unofficial roommate came to grace us with his presence. Apparently Randy had left at some point, because he came through the door of the apartment with a platter of breakfast food. God. There were days that I fucking loved Randy and this was going to be one of them.
"AJ, you gotta give up on the pep talks." Randy said interrupting the on-going speech. "Jeff's not going to change, I'm not going to change, and you aren't going to change. Live and let live, right?"
"Randy." I said quietly waiting for him to face me. Then, I dropped to the floor and bowed. "You are a god! A god I say!"
I could hear Randy's laugh as soon as saw what I was doing and Jeff and AJ weren't too far behind.
"You have to stop watching That 70's Show." Randy said shaking his head. "It's out of date."
"Out of date?" I said holding my chest as if stricken. "Never. Television is timeless."
"It's also about to be obsolete." Randy said amused and sat on the coffee table. "Anyway, I have the works here because tonight is going to be one hell of a night. Asuka always gives us a great time, but tonight I told her I would chip for something that would take it over the edge." He smirked in the snake-like way that he did. "Buckle up, boys! We are going to have an insane party tonight. I expect us all to be out of commission."
"Fuck yes." I said hopping up and putting my fist out. Randy put his fist next to mine, Jeff on my otherside, and AJ begrudgingly across from me. "Guys, tonight we have the opportunity to have a kick ass time and make a memory that we will never forget. Yes, even you, AJ." He made a "ha-ha" gesture before flipping me off. "So let's do this shit right and get down tonight."
"Jesus have you always been this corny?" Randy asked looking at me in a mixture of approval and cringe.
"Yes I have. So, let's do this." I said looking around at each of them. "We didn't ask for the name, but anybody who's anybody in the party scene knows us. We're the fucking Brotherhood and we're going to party so hard the whole place will get shut down."
"Hell yeah!" Randy and Jeff yelled together while AJ "Nice Guy" Styles rolled his eyes. With that we broke our group apart with our pact complete.
I started to head off to finally get the shower I desperately required when Randy said one sentence that sent a chill down my spine.
"So.. who's going to take over Daisy and Asuka's share?" Fuck.
I didn't have to turn around to know that three pair of eyes were suddenly burning a hole in his back. God damn it. I turned around and Jeff was already handing me the platter for Daisy and Asuka. God damn it, Jeff. I tried to stop myself from being moved as Randy and AJ teamed up to push me out of the door. The only time these fuckers teamed up was to get me into positions like this. It wasn't long before I lost the battle and was left standing in the hallway. With no other choice, I walked the few steps to stand in front of Daisy and Asuka's apartment. Dreading being born, I raised my hand and knocked. Nothing. Oh thank God. Thank God. I wouldn't have deliver it after all.
*creak* I closed my eyes slowly and smacked myself in the forehead. Just my luck. I opened my eyes and saw that Daisy and Asuka's apartment was dark. Too dark. They must not have had the blinds open. I walked in slowly. It was quiet. Too quiet. I manage to shuffle my way into their kitchen where I put down the platter and quickly started backtracking. I made it back to the living room before a hand wrapped itself around the back of my neck. I turned to look over my shoulder and was met with what looked like a traditional Japanese mask covered in blood. Covered.. in blood? Covered in blood!? I jumped forward and spun around. My turn was far from graceful and I found myself on the ground in no time. I scrambled back against the wall as the person in the mask crawled on top of me and I leaned back. The person moved the mask aside so it hung off of the side of their face and it was revealed to be Asuka.
"Oh.. hey Asuka.." I said trying not to notice as she stared at me without saying a word and licking her lips. Please no. "Mind.. uh.. Giving me some space here?"
"Space?" Asuka asked to the air around her. "No, we don't need any space. In fact, we've had enough space so far. I think we're overdue for another.. appointment."
"Appointment?" I asked not fully getting her meaning but also entirely getting her meaning. "Oh! Hey. We're uh.. Good friends but.."
"But nothing." Asuka said standing up. She stared down at me with some VERY evil in her eyes and said two words that still haunted me. "Asuka fucks." Then, she turned and walked away. Shit.
I jumped on to my feet and I do mean jumped. Then, I nearly sprinted the few steps out of the apartment and slammed the door behind me. Seriously, fuck those guys for this.
Daisy's POV
My eyes stared at my clock in utter annoyance, it was about eleven and I didn't really want to get out of bed. This has probably been the most peace and quiet I have had in several days, I should be treasuring it and sleeping some more. But no, that isn't how the world works. My body isn't wanting to respond to me, I wanted to get up and take a nice shower to wake myself up. However I continued to lay in the same spot, the only sound I could hear was my small fan blowing a refreshing breeze in my direction. I always have to sleep with some kind of sound on. A slight pain hit my stomach before it growled loudly, I can't even remember the last time that I ate some time yesterday I believe. Now that I have decided my mission to find something to eat, if there is even anything left. We normally order takeout or go grab some fast food. I managed to finally sit myself up on the edge of the bed before I let out a loud yawn. Move Daisy, move. I am fucking starving. Getting up to my feet, I trudged my way over toward my bedroom door. I didn't hear the television or the radio, nothing but silence on the other side of the door. It wasn't abnormal, my roommate is pretty unique. That's one of the many things that I could say about her but I am not sure if I want to go down that route just yet. Opening the door, I noticed the woman sitting on the couch in a weird position, I have seen her in it often but can't recall the name of it. It was almost Indian style but the feet were in the middle instead of on the outside.. fucking Lotus position that is what it's called. Her hands made a circle resting on her legs. Her eyes were closed until they slowly opened and looked directly over to me. Shit, maybe I should have went back to sleep. "You are up earlier than usual. What's the occasion?" Her tone was soft but it still sent a shiver down my spine. Her lips curled into a sadistic grin knowing that she can intimidate me so easily.
"I didn't mean to interrupt your morning meditation but I am starving." I started making my way over toward the kitchen while the pale skinned woman stayed in her spot on the couch. Short red and blue hair that barely touch her shoulder, those aren't the only colors I have seen since I have known her. I could only groan once I open the fridge to see that there was nothing really in it. Great, I guess I am going to have to order takeout or something. "Asuka."
"What?" She almost snarled, please God, don't bite my face off. It's too pretty.
"Is there anything in particular you want to eat for lunch?"
"Not sure yet. However I do have something to ask you, do you have any plans tonight?" There was a particular gleam in her eyes whenever she turned to look back at me.
Oh dear god, why is Asuka asking me that? Normally that means some of the best and worst nights of my life. I am slightly terrified. "Actually I was going to chill with Melina-"
"We are going out tonight, and I invited the boys."
Alrighty then I guess I am going to cancel my plans with her and move that to tomorrow night hopefully. Mel's got a hot temper so I don't want to bring her here and have her interact with Asuka. Not after last time, oh dear god, never again. "Oh that sounds like fun." Thank god, I could use some drinks and partying sounds like a good time right now.
"Leave me to be to meditate in peace, the boys disrupted it earlier. I heard questionable noises earlier that I wish to forget. I must find inner peace before I deal with the stupid." Asuka sighed, turning back to face the position that her body was facing.
Yeah, it's better than I go back into my room and do other things to get ready for the day while Asuka meditates. I guess I am going to get my shower before food after all since I know for a fact that the Japanese woman does not mind the sound of running water. I did however grab a bottle of water from the fridge before prepare to exit in my solitude, that's whenever I heard a small clicking noise. Hm? I passed that over because it could have been someone leaving from across the hall. I mean AJ is always up at the crack of dawn for whatever reason, hell sometimes I am awake still probably whenever he gets up. I have things to do at night, what can I say. The door practically swung open almost hitting the wall, like this place isn't dented up enough..these poor walls have seen better. There stood someone that was very familiar to myself and all the others, not someone I wanted to see this early in the morning. She was a few inches shorter than I am, about Asuka's height with long, blonde hair that she normally keeps up neatly in a ponytail. Most of the time, she is wearing the colors pink and black because it's what she does. For her age, she's very in shape but that's all I am going to say. Her hands were full of many plastic bags as much as she could carry. "I BOUGHT GROCERIES! " Oh, maybe I can tolerate having you over just this once Natalya, just don't say another word.
"And here is the STUPID!" The Japanese woman pointed over toward the blonde woman, who glared directly at the younger of the two.
"Excuse me Missy, who are you calling stupid? I brought both of you ladies some food and that's how you are going to thank me?" She scowled angrily her hands going on her hips.
"Asuka probably heard Randy with another one of his female 'friends' this morning so she's grumpy. She hates whenever something disrupts her morning meditation." I said trying to shimmer down the other woman, last thing I want is to anger Asuka. It's not pretty, I speak from experience.
"That man is so distasteful I swear, who does things like that?" Uhhhh, I am not going to answer that honestly. The blonde let herself into our apartment, shutting the door in the process. Who gave you a key anyways because I sure as hell didn't? The blonde woman made her way over toward me, a wide smile appearing across her face. Why couldn't I have been in my room already? "Look at you waking up before two in the afternoon, it's not healthy to be up all night doing whatever activities you do. You look like you just rolled out of bed." The older woman set all the bags onto the counter before reaching up in an attempt to fix my hair. Why does she have to do this? "Such a mess.."
"I realize this but I am not going to be entering any beauty pageants Nattie, I am fine looking like this until I go shower." I said annoyed, trying to get her to stop touching my head. She is very persistent about fixing my hair though.
"Fine fine, don't be so grumpy. I bought a whole bunch of healthy goodies because you have been eating too much fast food. You aren't working out enough, you are going to end up gaining weight." Oh I do plenty of exercising but I am not going to tell you that now, am I? Wait, is she saying that I am getting fat? "I always go on my morning runs about nine in the morning, you should join me sometimes."
"No thanks, that's too early." I said while nonchalantly trying to dig through the bags to see what Nattie managed to bring me.
"Well we are going to do it sometime this week, we need you to have a healthier lifestyle." In one ear and out the other, this is why I don't like dealing with you sometimes.
"Tch, my lifestyle is perfect the way that is it. I am going to go take a shower."
"Okay, I am going to put away the groceries and fix you ladies some lunch. I bet you girls are hungry." That is one thing that I am thankful for, Nattie has like this sixth sense for knowing whenever I need something. It's hella creepy though. She is over here so fucking often that the blonde looked in the fridge and saw that there was no food. "Ahem, I didn't hear a thank you."
"Thanks.." Nattie smiled and pointed to her cheek. "No."
"Goodness you are grouchy this morning, once you get some edible food in you, you will feel much better." She leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. God damn it Nattie, why do you have to do this? I didn't say anything more and walked back over toward my bedroom. At least I can have some peace in the shower hopefully and maybe Asuka won't want to go on a murder spree afterwards. I have a feeling that tonight is going to be interesting, hopefully I won't regret cancelling my plans with Mel.
Third Person POV
"Where the fuck is Jeff?" Randy hissed. "He should of been here by now with the weed. I put in a bit extra to get some really good shit and if I don't get it. Tonight is not going to be the rager I want it to be."
"You can keep the weed. I'm trying to get drunk and get drunk fast." Lance said leaning with a drink already in his hand.
"Fast is the exact opposite of what you should be doing if you want to have fun." AJ berated.
"God it just never stops with you, huh AJ?" Lance said take another gulp out of his cup.
"Now now children calm down. This is suppose to be a fun time." Daisy adding herself into the conversation knowing that bickering was about to start. She turned her head and scanned the bar looking for anyone she could possibly hook up with but no one of interest. "Fuck, nothing yet."
"Nothing yet, Daiz?" Randy asked with a smirk. "You're losing your touch."
"Ha, I am not losing anything." The brunette scoffed taking a sip of her drink.
"That's not what Stacy says." Randy grinned in his way and called for a shot.
"Wait, what the hell has Stacy told you? Because she has told me plenty of things about you.."
"You guys are still talking to Stacy? I don't think I ever could. Her legs are just too long. It puts me on edge." Lance interrupted.
"Don't you think it's disrespectful to talk about a woman that isn't here, not to mention in a suggestive way like that." AJ cut all of them off being the joykill that he is at outings like this.
"I find it disrespectful that you aren't talking with us about this woman in a suggestive manner." Lance said mock affronted.
"Yeah, AJ." Randy said cutting in. "Why haven't you fucked Stacy yet?"
"Join us, AJ. Join us." Daisy performed a "come hither" motion.
"You guys are children." AJ muttered to himself caught somewhere between amusement and distaste.
"Maybe you wouldn't be such a buzzkill if you got laid." Daisy mumbled taking another big sip of her drink.
"Getting laid wouldn't change AJ. That's just who he is." Asuka said surprising the fuck out of everyone who forgot she was there. She never has to do much to scare anyone it seems and she enjoys the hell out of that. "Plus, I've seen what he can do firsthand.." And there was something even more surprising.
"And suddenly I don't want to talk about this ever again." Lance practically yelled. "More shots!"
"Oh my god yes, more of those please. I want to forget what I just heard. Yeah, I am going to go make a phone call now." Daisy spoke eager to leave the table and get away from this conversation. She stood up only to be stopped by someone grabbing her waist.
She looked back to see that it was Asuka with that creepy ass grin on her face. "No." The brunette blinked a couple times until Asuka released her wrist. She practically reached deep enough to grab her crotch. Asuka pulled out it, turned it off and set it on the table. "Now, be a good, little Daisy and plant your ass in the seat." The brunette wasn't going to protest and sat back in her seat, her wide eyes staring straight ahead to avoid looking at the Japanese woman.
"Well this doesn't look like my AA meeting." Jeff said walking up to the group.
"God damn it, Jeff." Randy stood up to make room for him. "What took you so long?" Jeff is the type of guy that doesn't have a sense of time. He could tell you that he would be gone for about ten minutes. But is it ever really just ten minutes, of course not. Ten minutes could equal an hour for him.
"Transaction took longer than I thought, but I got the Vitamin C right here." Jeff raised a bag of weed and shook it.
Randy took the bag and opened it. He took a sniff and looked up at the stoner with a mad grin. "Holy fuck, Jeff, you mad genius. Time to get this party started."
About 30 Minutes Later..
"Jesus Christ." AJ said disapprovingly with an "End my suffering" expression. "Too much, too fast."
Jeff inhaled from his blunt deeply and stood up. Oh God. He was going to speak. "Guys. Did you guys hear about all those break-ins? They've been going on for a while. "Jeff waited for them all to nod yes or no before continuing. "Well.. I learned something very important about them today." He declared raising his hands in the air. "Their leader has a huge rack man! Like I respect women and all that, but damn! I was so caught off guard."
"Like how big are we talking?" That was probably the only thing that Jeff has said that actually caught Daisy's attention. "Like my size, bigger? Gimme something here." She gestured to her own chest.
"Well uh.. Alright imagine a watermelon. Okay? Then, cut that watermelon in half, okay? Following me? Cut that in half and put the round ends on a woman and that's how big. They were like two bazookas, but they were breasts man!" Jeff moved his hands sporadically through the air as he tried to get them to understand what he was talking about.
"Fuck yeah, Jeff!" Randy broke off as he pulled away from tonight's girlfriend. "More of an ass man myself, but I appreciate a great rack."
"I appreciate both for sure, like I swear this blonde I got with once had the nicest ass I had ever laid my eyes on. I knew I had to get ahold of that. She normally comes to this place, I was hoping to see her tonight. Oh well, what can you do?" Daisy smirked thinking back to said blonde, she was something else.
"Wait break-ins? When the fuck did those start?" Lance asked cutting through their sexual desires.
"About three weeks or so ago, it was on the news a few days ago about the latest one." AJ said happy that the conversation went back in its original direction.
"I should've known that AJ would know." Lance groaned. "Have anymore information? Like why they decided to dress up as graverobbers?"
"No, but that's obviously to keep their identity a secret. But the only thing that I do know is that the string of break ins have been in the same five mile radius. Close to here."
"Wowee AJ. Thanks for sharing that super amazing factoid with us. Nice to know that you watch the news as much as my grandmother does." Lance scratched his forehead and pointed at his friend. "In fact, I'm sure she has bingo next Wednesday, you should join her I know how important it is to keep the elderly active."
Before AJ could retaliate, Jeff yelled."CLICK CLACK BOOM! HERE COMES THE PAIN! BORK LASER!"
"Did you just have a stroke, Jeff? Are you alright?" Daisy looked over at the older man, who was pretending to shoot a machine gun. "Yeah he's fine.." She said sarcastically placing on hand over her face. " Damn it Jeff.."
"Okay, Jeff has had enough." Lance laughed getting up. He walked over to his friend and patted his back. "You're cut off and you need to get to sleep. To be honest, you look like shit."
"Already called a cab." AJ said putting his phone away.
"Congratulations AJ, do you want a fucking medal?" Daisy said louder than she intended to, she went back to drinking one of her many she had tonight. He looked over at the youngest brunette but decided not to say anything back to her.
"You should all call me Captain Cannabis!" Jeff struck a superhero pose.
"Go see if you can fly, oh mighty superhero." Daisy was the first one to speak after another one of Jeff's weird outbursts. Who are they kidding? Everything that leaves that man's mouth is fucking weird.
"God damn it, Jeff! Settle down!" AJ scolded, it was a rare occasion to hear him curse. Even though the brunette man wasn't the oldest out of the group, he was definitely to most mature. He felt like he was always around a bunch of children with the exception of Asuka, who hardly even speaks. She has her moments though. Most of the time, AJ wishes he could walk away and pretend like he doesn't know any of them. He has a good heart and doesn't want to risk any of them getting hurt due to their own stupid choices. "The cab will be here in five minutes!" Jeff looked at AJ petulantly and slowly sat back down at the table. "Alright now we can wait patiently to go home."
It took about 5 solid minutes of awkward silence for the cabs to come. Lance slammed a couples of shots down, Daisy sat drunkenly, Jeff spaced out, Randy's makeout session was getting too intimate for public eyes (doubt he cared), AJ was keeping an eye on his phone, and Asuka was eyefucking someone at the bar who was eyefucking her right back. All in all, the group was calm. Thankfully for some in the group, it was a mercifully short time before AJ perked up.
"The cab is here." AJ said standing up. "Let's go I ordered a taxi van, so we should fit."
One by one everyone slowly got up from the table, Randy had added difficulty with his new neck brace, and shuffled towards the exit. On the way, Asuka tapped a man sitting at the bar's shoulder. Without a word, the man got out of his seat and followed her. Their group was now apparently eight. Jeff, surprisingly, is the one who immediately noticed the problem.
"1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6.. 7.. 8.." Jeff counted, his finger pointing at a different person as he said each number. "Hey AJ. You didn't get a big enough basket for the bread, man."
AJ looked back in confusion. "What are you talking about, Jeff?"
"You didn't strike the right pose for Madonna." Jeff made a quick pose to emphasize.
"Sure Jeff. It'll be fine." AJ said nodding his head. "Whatever it is will be fine."
"Fuck yeah, Jeff! We need to buy a bread basket!" Randy said pumping his fist. His female friend giggled at his antics before continuing where they left off.
"There it is." AJ pointed at the yellow cab/van smitty warbermenjensen. "I'll talk to the guy real quick and figure out how much it is."
With that the group was left to figure out that they needed to get in, Randy was the first person as he was eager to get laid. He and his "date" stumbled over each other trying to get in, but eventually settled on the far left in the back row. Next was Jeff who looked worn out and ready for bed. He settled down next to them and closed his eyes. Asuka and her eyefucking partner squeezed into the last bit of space. Daisy tried to get in next, but couldn't get them to move down any further. She moved to reposition herself only to end up falling on her ass. Lance cringed at the impact and reached down to haul her up.
"Hey Styles." Lance said helping the brunette to her feet. "You miscalculated."
AJ turned to see what he meant and realized that the back row was full. Then, he realized that there were two extra people with them. "Shit. Sorry guys. I can have Nattie come down and pick you up or call a taxi."
"Fuck that. I'll see you guys later." Daisy shrugged and immediately started walking down the sidewalk. She wasn't exactly in the mood to see or hear anything Nattie had to say. It would be a two hour conversation about how she needs to change her habits and blah blah blah. She has heard that way too many times before. What was so wrong about going out and having some fun?
"Aw shit." Lance chuckled. "I better catch up to her. Don't call Nattie yet, at least wait until we're gone."
AJ looked like he wanted to disagree, but gave a short nod and climbed into the front seat. "You have 15 minutes. Then, I'm calling Nattie."
"Thanks Pops." Lance yelled jogging after Daisy who was moving quickly despite her drunken state.
The pair of long time friends walked together in silence for several moments before Daisy spoke. "I could have fucked Melina tonight."
Lance put a hand on his chest mock affronted. "Am I such bad company?"
Daisy tried to punch him in the shoulder, but just stumbled past him. He reached out to stop her from having a hard fall and brought her back to two feet. As soon as she was she socked him in the shoulder anyway. "Don't be a jackass. You don't understand, have you seen her ass? Plus she's super flexible, downside is that she's kinda a bitch. I can deal with that though. But no, I had to cancel because you never say no to Asuka."
"Jackass? I'm always that. Yes, I have seen her ass you've shown it to me enough times on your phone while bragging that you were about to hit that. Super flexible? I know because of that time she did a split outside of your door while waiting for you to open up." Lance said in a droll sarcastically. "At least you didn't say no to Asuka. Had a run in with her earlier and she really is a ninja. Probably works as an assassin during the day."
"That wouldn't surprise me to be honest. She hardly speaks and just mediates all the time. Are we even going the right way?"
Lance scanned the are in search of a street sign and spotted one. "West and Barker? Fuck think we went a block or two in the wrong direction. Not used to this area. Think we need to head down this way." He pointed to a slightly sketchy looking street.
"Then, let's go!" Daisy shouted pumping her fist as she led the way.
"Okay.." Lance snickered. He was amused by his friend's antics.
Daisy was able to go the correct way for a while, but as usual all good things must come to an end. She wandered into an alleyway and Lance followed close behind.
"Daiz, how do you get lost going in a straight line?"
"I'm not lost. I just found adventure!" She tried to justify her reasoning only for her friend to stare at her with a blank expression on his face.
"I.. yeah sure."
They continued down the alley until they heard voices coming from the building on their right. Lance turned to Daisy and shook his head. "Daisy no."
That like always, that fell on deaf ears as she pointed back to the building. "But it's a mystery. We have to investigate." Lance was no strangers to these 'adventures' that Daisy would drag him out on. Most of time, it always lead to some sort or trouble or stupidity. He technically had no choice in the matter to tag along with her, it was either that or go back and wait for Nattie. He wasn't going to do that. What Lance could do was try to convince her not to be stupid.
"No." He said bluntly, not wanting to get involved in whatever stupid bullshit she was about to do.
"I'll be Sherlock and you'll be Watters." She spoke confidently not realizing in her drunken state that she had gotten one of the names wrong.
"Watters? You mean Watson?" Lance arched a brow at the younger woman, who could only look at him with uncertainty.
"Watt ever man." The brunette scoffed before laughing at her own joke for several seconds on end. In all honesty, it was a really back pun but to Daisy is was the most hilarious thing that ever left her mouth apparently.
"I wonder if this is what an aneurysm feels like.."
"Come along Watt Man! We gotta save the day!" She almost screamed, inching her way closer toward the side of the building. Lance didn't budge for a second and Daisy twirled her finger trying to get him to come over toward her.
"Are we superheroes now?" He asked almost mockingly.
"Yeah! Just call me Mistress Daisy!" Lance stared blankly at her again, the fact that she had came up with a name so fast confused him. It was almost like she had this in her head the entire time, or maybe since Jeff had called himself Captain Cannabis or whatever the hell he said.
"That sounds a bit sexual don't you think? I mean for a superhero?"
"Quiet before I whip you!" She snarled not realizing how bad that actually sounded out loud.
"No need to get kinky on me."
"Not like that. Like Indiana Jones." She said flicking her wrist in a whipping motion and failing miserably.
"Indiana Jones? I'm not going to be Mutt." Lance retorted back.
She immediately placed her ear around the wall, trying to hear through the thick walls. "Pipe down. I'm trying to hear." She hushed him, waving her hand dramatically around. Daisy climbed haphazardly on top of a dumpster and peered through one of the windows. Lance stood behind her in the inevitable case that she would fall. Daisy spotted a group of people in black masks and outfits moving large boxes on to trucks. She noticed that one of the people wearing a black mask who had a big rack was collecting money from two men in suits. "Ooo! They're the robbers!"
"What? The ones from the news?" He said quietly over to his friend that had to just really scream that realization out loud.
"Yeah! This is some kind of criminal activity!" She spoke loudly once again not controlling the volume of her own voice. It was probably too difficult for her.
"Hey Daiz?"
"Yeah?" She turned back to look at him but still tried to see what was going on.
"Time to get the hell out of here."
"Right! We need to report this to the police!" The brunette spun around in excitement, forgetting that she was on a dumpster and fell into Lance's already waiting arms. They both crashed to the ground with a noticeable thump.
"God damn it, Daisy." Lance sighed grasping his aching back. "Now, let's go." He got on to his feet and turned to his friend only to realize that there were now four people in black masks standing in front of them. "Shit." Lance raised his arms in the air as they walked closer. "Hey listen man. We don't want any trouble." He didn't even have to see their faces to know that they weren't going to let them off easy, so without thinking too much about it. Lance shrugged and punched the one in front of him straight in the face. He spun on his feet, grabbed Daisy's hand, and they took off running. "Shit, shit, shit. You and your damn adventures!"
"Fuck. We have to lose them somehow." Daisy said looking back. She was struggling to regain some sense of clear thinking in light of the serious situation that they found themselves in.
Lance dropped her hand and used both hands to throw a trash can behind. He took his first look back and saw one of the shorter people catch it in both hands. His eyes widened in surprise as that same person pulled back and threw it back at him twice as fast. Lance couldn't move fast enough to dodge and instead took the can to the upper part of his back and neck. He crashed to the floor little grace and laid there.
Daisy, who had overtaken him when he stopped to throw the can, stopped and ran back towards him. She picked up a pipe on the way and charged into battle. Daisy had no experience using a pipe as a weapon, but that didn't really matter. She swung as hard as she could and smacked one of the masked figures in the face. The rest stopped as their associate crumbled to the ground. Seeing that she had the advantage, Daisy kept the pipe in front of her and waved it at them.v"Stay back! I just want to take my friend and leave!" Daisy jabbed the pipe at one of the figures who got too close for comfort and actually hit their arm. "I said stay back!"
The shortest figure stepped forward and didn't even flinch at Daisy's waving of the pipe. The brunette tried to swing at the masked person, but the pipe was caught with one hand. The masked woman chopped Daisy's wrist and ripped the pipe free. Then, the short figure gave Daisy a punch that could probably be considered a lovetap and sent her stumbling backwards over Lance's prone form. She fell hard and looked at the sky dazed.
Lance started getting back to his feet with his head still hung. He didn't have a plan, but he really didn't want to die tonight. Lance growled as he was grabbed by Shortie and grabbed the arm holding him with both hands. His eyes widened in surprise as he was lifted off of his feet and his face was basked in moonlight. Meanwhile, Shortie reeled back slightly in surprise. The taller man took this to his advantage and slipped out of the loosened grasp. He dropped to his feet and threw another punch, which was caught in her hand. The short figure had gotten over the shock and was ready to end this. Shortie kicked Lance in the knee, making him fall easily. He grabbed hold of it, not expecting the kick to be so powerful.
The masked woman came to hover over him, but before they could do anything more, there was a loud smacking sound. The short figure turned to look at their associates and saw them laying in heaps on the ground. A redheaded woman stood above them armed with a baseball bat.
"Looks like your friends are out of the game." The new stranger said smugly resting her bat on her shoulders. "I don't suppose you want to be next?"
Shortie faced the new intruder and moved towards her confidently. They anticipated the incoming bat swing and caught it. What they didn't anticipate was the boot to the gut or how much it would hurt. The woman robber reeled from the sudden damage and reassessed the woman in front of them. This was no ordinary human. Shortie struck the redhead in the side with a kick, but it was caught and countered with a punch to chest. The short figure stumbled back more in surprise than actual pain. This variable was new and unexpected. They needed to report to their master. Shortie grabbed the dumpster behind them and lifted it. They turned and tossed it at the surprised redhead, who was just fast enough to move out of the way.
The redhead covered her head as the dumpster flew past. Then, she scanned for the figure. They were nowhere to be found, gone without a trace. The mysterious woman sighed in frustration before remembering the two other people in the alley. Lance had gotten up first since Daisy had puked from her level of intoxication. He helped her up, feeling a presence coming towards him. Lance faced this new presence and spotted the redhead.
"Another one?" Lance asked himself in exasperation. "Why me?"
She studied both of them for a moment, they were just ordinary humans but they were trying to fight off people are strong as those robbers. They were either brave or stupid. The redhead was leaning more toward the second option. "You there. I need a place to stay." The redhead demanded, pointing over toward Lance.
That stunned him that the mysterious woman was actually speaking to him. "What? I must be in an alternate universe, because I swear you just said you need a place to stay." Lance said disbelieving what this woman was demanding of him.
"I do need a place to stay. You will provide it." The redhead said simply, holding her bat down to her side. Lance continued to study her body language, his eyes stayed on the bat for a moment.
"Jesus Christ. We have the Queen of England in our presence. You hear that, Daiz?" Lance said rubbing his friend's back as she finally stopped being sick.
Daisy stood back up fully and finally caught sight of the redhead. HO-LY SHIT. She was the most beautiful woman that the brunette had ever laid her eyes on, for right now anyway. "Is she a goddess?" She stage whispered to Lance.
"Of course." Lance facepalmed before turning back over to the woman in front of them. "Listen I'm not giving you a place to stay, I don't even know you." For all he knew, she could have been one of those robbers. What if she was and tried to kill them? Why is she so pushy about making them give her a place to stay?
"She needs a place to stay!?" Daisy yelled right into Lance's ear, looking back over to the mysterious piece of eyecandy in front of her. How she didn't have a bed for the night was beyond her, she was smoking hot. Probably could bag anyone she wanted, and Lance was doing to be dumb enough to turn that down. "Dibs!" She wasn't going to miss this chance, she might never see this chick again.
"Dibs?" Lance asked incredulously, his patience was starting to run out. "You can't be serious."
"She's hot." Daisy said as if that justified it. "She can stay with me."
"I.. I.. I.." Lance felt like he was indeed having a stroke as he tried to forced words out. "I fucking can't." He let go of Daisy and looked back at the redhead. "Fuck it. Just fuck it." He was going to pretend that the last several minutes of that conversation didn't happen. His friend was prone to make stupid choices when intoxicated at times but this took the cake.
Lance turned away from the two and started walking off. He was out of commission for the night. Daisy seemed to realize that he was leaving them and started to follow, but not before calling out to the hot redhead. "Come on! He's our ticket home!" Instead of looking regretful for the decision to seek shelter with these two, the redhead looked pleased with herself as she followed behind them.