Junior didn't know what was wrong with him. He loved Kris still, even though she'd hurt him so badly. Yet, as much as he wished he could deny it, he was completely mesmerized.
Even though Junior never payed attention to his conscience, he could faintly hear from it that he was falling for Gillian. She was Matt's old girlfriend. He knew now just how much of a bitch payback was. And, unfortunately, in his innermost thoughts, he knew that this was simply a way to get back at Matt.
He was still so pissed at him. He had a right to be. They had been in love. Not too long ago, Junior had been sure that was still true and was prepared to do something about it. There were so many moments where he just wanted to go back to the past. Where he just wanted to kiss her.
But then they had both hurt him in the worst way humanely possible. They'd torn his heart out. He wasn't even sure if it was there anymore. For days, all he had the strength to do was eat and sleep. Hell, he barely had strength enough for that. After that period had passed, he started to get more involved in the farm. He eventually lost sight of himself and was buried in Davis Farms paperwork. He caught himself acting more and more like his father. That was no who he wanted to be.
So there he sat, in the stables at Davis, chewing on a piece of straw, trying to relax. Figure out his priorities. He lay back on the hay bale he was sitting on and closed his eyes briefly, sighing loudly. He took the wet straw out of his mouth and toyed with it. He thought for a moment before thinking the thought that had threatened to pop into his head (a/n: I know that line is really weird).
FLASHBACK
"What about the rodeo?" Kris asked him between bouts of passion.
"Screw it," Junior said on her lips as his tongue swirled into her mouth and she moaned. He pulled up her shirt, suddenly all too aware of what was going on. This wasn't right. He couldn't do this. But then her fingernails scratched his scalp and he lost it, groaning quietly.
She took off his shirt delicately, brushing her fingers softly across his silky smooth chest. She felt bad. She felt like one of those girls. Those girls who slept with anyone they could get their hands on. First Matt, now Junior? Again? She'd just wanted to comfort him, and then he leaned in and... well, here they were.
He moaned into another kiss as her tongue tickled the roof of his mouth. She grinned against his plump lips and he laughed quietly as he broke away for a millisecond. Then his lips crashed against hers again as he pushed her back onto the bed roughly, making her wince.
He lay on top of her and she took off his pants, not even bothering to unbutton or unzip them. He repeated the same thing with her light blue jeans.
They lay there afterwards, sweaty and breathing heavily. Kris turned and propped herself up on her elbow, looking at Junior intently. He stared back at her with that little twinkle in his eye. He ever-so-slightly smirked and her eyes fell to his lips as she leaned in.
"That was great," Kris said, brushing her hand against his neck and chest. She was still amazed at how smooth it was, even after all this time. It was as soft as a baby's bottom.
"Yeah, it was," Junior said back softly.
END FLASHBACK
Junior was startled out of his daydream by the neighing of a horse. He saw Gillian ride into the barn with her cap on, as well as blazer and khaki pants. He stayed where he was, hoping to avoid her. Honestly, he just didn't want to talk to anyone right now. He needed some space. Even though he'd been taking it quite a bit lately.
She walked over to the stall, where she heard some rustling when she came in. She peered inside and saw none other than Junior Davis, laying back, chewing on a piece of straw. That's uncharacteristic, Gillian thought.
She strode in and walked up to him, kneeling in front of the bale. He immediately sat up and she kissed him without a word.
Junior tried to pretend he was kissing Kris, but it just wasn't the same. With Gillian, everything was more awkward, he felt weird around her. Their tongues didn't do the same dance that his and Kris' did every time they met.
He pulled away quickly, making Gillian beet red with embarrassment. Had she done something wrong? He looked at her face, which showed just what he was feeling. Why not give it another shot? Junior asked himself.
He didn't bother to let his gaze fall on her lips, just leaned in and kissed her, trying to do the same thing he and Kris always did. She made several attempts to give him what he wanted, but all failed. God, this is wrong, Junior thought. Its just not the same. Am I ever going to get over her?
He abruptly pulled away from her and walked out of the stall. Out of the barn. He went into the dark house and gloomily stepped up the numerous steps until he reached his bedroom. He turned the light on and his eyes immediately met with the bottle of half-full pills on his nightstand.
They helped him. It never hurt when he took one. It helped. He just had to remember that. He flopped back on the bed and opened the orange bottle in a flash. He took out three of the small purple pills and popped them into his mouth, grabbing the glass of Sprite next to him and chugging it down.
Before he knew it, he had fallen asleep, dreaming of a place where only he and Kris existed. Where no one tried to screw everything up between them. It was a paradise, their paradise. No Gillian, no Matt, no Ritters, no annoying fathers to interfere. Just them, sipping drinks on the beach and relaxing, never leaving this wonderful place.
Kris uttered one sentence before his dream went black, "You know what's right, Junior." And then she kissed him. After that everything was dark and he couldn't see a thing. He felt his real self begin to cry in his sleep and he awoke, staring at the ceiling and sobbing all night. He didn't car if he was acting like a girl, this helped. It made him feel better. He didn't feel like such a mess. After hours and hours of bawling, he finally allowed sleep to overtake him again. Although it was a restless one, it was much needed and helped him a lot. He would wake the next day and start new. He was sure of that now. Their real-life paradise was over. His mourning period was over. It was time for Junior Davis to move on.