Disclaimer: This belongs to JK Rowling and Warner Bros. The authors are making no money off of it. Any other citations will be made where necessary.
Rating: PG 13. Slash.
READ AUTHOR'S NOTE FIRST:
Authors' Notes: First of all, this was written mostly by two people, with the help of a few others. So if you see "we" instead of "I" it's not cause we're schizo. This is not meant to be offensive. As a matter of fact, we're big fans of Harry Potter. We just thought we'd write a parody about it. But don't think we'd let books like Animorphs and movies like Shrek get out of our jokes. See if you can identify it. Enjoy.
This is a VERY dumb story.
Harry Potter and the Sluts of Hogwarts
One very fine, well actually not very fine, day Harry was thinking. Thinking about what you might ask? Well he was thinking about his friend Ron and how much he missed him. You see Harry had a deep, dark secret. What was this secret you might be wondering? Harry was bi (a bisexual).
Suddenly his owl Hedwig flew through the damn window. She toppled onto Harry's shoulder and shit out a roll of parchment onto the floor, covered in slime.
"What kind of sick bastard would shove a roll of parchment up an owl's ass?" Harry muttered to himself, but picked it up all the same, "bless your heart, you shittin' blessed bird." He opened the slime covered letter.
Dearest Harry,
How about if you come visit for some fun. The whole family's here and we're gonna have lots of fun. Apparate on over here as soon as you get this.
Love, your friend.
"YES!!!" Harry bellowed with his manly voice, "He wrote love. Ah Ron, you sweetheart." He then apparated into Ron's room. He had walked in on something spectacular but also shitty.
He always knew Ron had a liking for each other, and had known there was something going on, but this was too much. You see they were hoppin' on the good foot and doin' the bad thing. Or maybe I should say they were having a little mojo. Or the choo-choo was going into the tunnel. Or you could just say they were fucking. He rubbed his eyes and looked again. He seemed to be having an LSD flashback.
"Listen Donkey," Shrek said, "I'm an ogre. Ogres have onion layered and oyu don't want a layered friend. I'll leave you crying and I'm not gay." He rubbed his eyes again.
"Oh Minnie, I love you," Mickey squeaked.
"And I, you," Minnie replied.
But then they were Hermione and Ron again. It was the first time he had every seen them naked and it give him a magic wand in his pocket.
That was just a sample. What ya think? Like it, hate it, wanna burn it? Think it's completely stupid? Well so do we. But that's not the point. The point is, we wanna know your opinion. It just takes a couple words. Review.
It might have been stupid, but you gotta admit, it was damn funny!