Final Fantasy VII
Ramblings of Boredom
We all know a bored Yuffie is a bad Yuffie, but sometimes there's nothing to stop her. Watch as our favorite characters suffer the wrath of a bored Yuffie.
Chapter 1-
It was another day at the Seventh Heaven and Yuffie was just plain bored. There was absolutely nothing to do. No one to intimidate or play pranks on. Even those little terrors were gone.
"Ughh!" Yuffie randomly burst out.
Tifa looked up from her glass cleaning, concerned, "Are you alright Yuffie?"
Yuffie wailed in desperation, "I'm bored!"
Tifa was less than condescending, "Well, why don't you help me clean these glasses?"
Yuffie peered at Tifa, "I said I was bored not desperate."
Tifa shrugged, "Suit yourself then," and resumed to ignore Yuffie.
Yuffie started tapping her finger against the table.
tap
tap
Yuffie looked at her fingers tapping in amazement. Then had a wide grin on.
taptaptaptap
taptaptappitytaptap
Yuffie was getting into it, and started drumming the table and dancing to her beat.
"YUFFIE!" Tifa yelled, "I know your bored, but find something other than that to do!"
She stared at her blankly, "Like what?"
Tifa sighed, "Why don't you..." she thought for a moment looking around, "Why don't we just talk?"
"Talking is boring," Yuffie complained.
Silence hung over the bar besides the occasional squeaks from the glasses.
"Why are you boobs so big?"
Tifa almost dropped her glass in surprise. She stared at Yuffie who was peering at her boobs closely. It was minorly disturbing.
She cleared her throat, "Well, I didn't ask them to be this big. It was just natural."
Yuffie scoffed, "You're lying. If it was just natural, mine would be just as big as yours. You must have done something," she thought, while Tifa was actually gaping at her. A thought came to Yuffie, "You must have taken some magical potion that instantly gives you big boobs!"
Tifa's eye started to twitch, "Umm... Yuffie, I'd rather not talk about this. How about another topic?"
As expected, she was ignored, "No...if that was the case, every girl would have big boobs...I got it!" she grinned at Tifa, "It must be some sort of exercise! That's why you're always working out, isn't it!?" Yuffie grinned widely like she had discovered the secret of life.
Tifa knew that Yuffie was random, but not this random, "Not really-"
Before Tifa could dispose some common sense to Yuffie, Yuffie barreled on her thoughts, "It must suck having big boobs. Being chased by pedophiles..." Yuffie asked Tifa seriously, "Have you ever worried about your bra just randomly bursting by the weight and size of your boobs?"
Even more confused and perplexed than before, all Tifa could do was watch Yuffie go on her...trail of randomness.
"Imagine if that happened in front of Spikey!" Yuffie gushed, "I bet he'd die from the amount of blood loss!" This caused Tifa to turn red, Yuffie didn't seem to notice the effect of her words.
She pondered, "Of course, if someone were to design a bra that would warn before bursting, they'd save people like Spikey." her eyebrows furrowed in concentration, "It would probably have to start yelling 'NIPPLE PEEK!"
She clapped her hands in exitement, "I got it!" She had on an even wider grin that before, "I'll be your warning device! If I think that you're going to have a Nipple Peek, I'll warn you!" Ignoring Tifa's protest, Yuffie ran off, "I'll tell Marlene and Denzel about this!"
Later on that evening, when all of Avalance got together for dinner, it was to Tifa's shock and embarresment, when all of a sudden, holding the chicken, she heard someones yelling, "NIPPLE PEEK!" Causing Tifa to drop the chicken, Cid to choke on his cigar, and for everyone else to stare at Yuffie, who promptly ran out of the room. It was Reeve who broke the silence, "What, if I may ask, is Yuffie yelling about?"
Tifa rubbed her face in agitation, "Don't ask...please, don't ask."
---author's note---
I have no idea what possessed me to write this. I'm thinking about continuing this. What do you think? Hope I've relieved you of your boredom and saved an innocent soul.