Burry Our Lies

Sometimes people change who they are on the outside so that when they're gone, no on will miss them. I was one of those people. I lived my life, and I was an asshole to everyone. It'd be a lie to say it was arrogance that made me not give a shit about anything, but it wasn't. I lived in my own world and no one else mattered because I knew how insignificant these years were.

I didn't need to work in class; I didn't need to be nice. I strut through school on my father's power and money and that worked for me, until the day I graduated. Well maybe it was before that. Yes, I'd have to say it was the cold day in April.

It was a particularly cool day considering summer was supposed to be fast approaching. There was an even more prominent mist covering the grounds than usual, when I went on my walk around the lake. As I approached my designated area I turned and faced the school, looking out over the vast lake. There was another body directly across from me, in my space, in my sunrise! I was outraged and all I could do was stare as the figure appears to float through the mist and around the lake to me.

Shit, it's Granger. Of all the people to interrupt my mourning routine it had to be her, thank you Merlin.

"Malfoy," she said as she sat next to me looking out on the lake with me.

"Granger," I was pissed. It took what little self control I possessed not to scream at her. Maybe she won't talk I thought to myself. And she didn't, not for at least 10 minutes, we just sat there. It became our morning ritual; those 10 minutes belonged to the sun. I always arrived first, she always showed up soon after.

That first day and few after were awkward, but for some reason we wanted to get along so we kept trying. We got used to each others company and I slowly got used to not yelling at her. We met every morning for a month. On May 14th she didn't show up until after the sunrise.

"Draco," she greeted.

"Hermione, where have you been?" I asked, "The sunrise was great this morning, our favorite kind."

"Draco, this might be our last shared morning." She whispered.

"What are you talking about, why?"

"I know you're lying to me, to everyone – but especially to me. The thing is though; we both know you're lying. But, Draco, I'm lying too. I've shown you almost all of me, but we all have our secrets." As she grabbed my left arm I knew she new, she knew she knew, and then I knew. I knew what we hid from each other, only she was much better at concealment. Like I said sometimes we burry ourselves away so people won't miss us when we're gone.

"Draco, I can't become myself without your consent, and I don't know why that is, but I can't. I need you to know all of me." As she reached in her pocket I knew what was coming and it brought tears to my own eyes. You never truly realize how much you care about someone until they ask you to. "My blood is clean, just like yours. I don't have muddy blood. I want you to prove that to yourself."

"Hermione, I can't do that. I can't hurt you."

"You're lying to me again. You're scared of what you'll find beneath my skin. If what I tell you is true, then you'll have to accept all of me and set me free. You're scared to lose me; you know that if I go you might not be able to follow."

"That's not true, it's not true! I can't hurt you, Hermione." She just stared. I looked down, I couldn't hold her gaze. She could see my pitiful existence of a soul. She knew everything there was to know about me, no matter how much I lied. She was still holding my arm. She knew that I would collapse, but she knew she'd have to wait. She opened my hand and dropped the cool metal razor. "Hermione, how can you ask me to do this?" Rhetorical question, I knew the answer, remember, I knew all the answers. As a few more moments passed she knew I was caving. "Fine…fine I am scared as hell to let you see a part of me that I've hidden from everyone, including myself. I'm scared you'll leave me."

"I'll never leave you. I need you - lies and all, always." She pulled up her sleeve to reveal several cuts and scars. Its funny how scars are never there when you want them, and always there when you hate them. You can never run from them, they may fade, but you know where they lie, you always know. To this day I know where they all lie, on both her and I. I stared; entranced by her blemished skin. She cuts at her own accord. As I drew the razor across her arm she felt the bite. Her sharp intake of breath brought me crashing back to earth, I broke down immediately and as I tried to look away she forced me to look at her, to look at her crimson blood. "You see, Draco, we're the same. We've always been the same."

That day did I not only mark her life, but mine as well. I hid myself, and everything that I was, so well that people just believed that I was that person. Hermione wasn't a bookworm because she was smart, she was a bookworm because it was easier than facing every ones opinions. That's what we're all afraid of, people's opinions. Hermione and I slowly came into ourselves. Well, I was slow, after that day Hermione was pretty easy going about who she was. I guess she wasn't lying when she asked me to set her free. True to her word, she's never left me; we still need each other as much as we did that day we finally met. Sometimes I wonder what would've happened without her, and again, I know the answer. When certain things happen to us we begin to understand what's happening around us just a little bit more, we begin to understand existence, and it's one of the greatest gifts.